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Good Enough	By : eavey Category: Individual Celebrities > Gerard Butler Views: 6293 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know Gerard Butler. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

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Good Enough

Chapter One

(A/N: The lyrics used in this chapter are not mine. They are from the song “Wreck of the Day” written by Anna Nalick on her album Wreck of the Day. Again, I did not write them.)

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Ann stood there on stage wondering why she was about to bear her sole to a bar full of strangers. It wasn’t that she had stage fright; well okay she kinda did, but that her lyrics were so personal. Right when she thought she was going to give up and walk off stage, her friend Drew leaned over.

“You can do this,” he whispered. “We practiced, like a hundred times. You’ll be fine.”

She was grateful that Drew had agreed to play her song. He was much better that her when it came to playing the guitar. Drew was an old high school friend who had moved out to New York to peruse his stage acting. He was in a band when Ann first met him. She was amazed that he, a junior, was so nice to her, a freshman. Over the years he had helped her develop her music writing and Ann had finally let go of her school girl crush.

Ann took one more look at the audience and got a thumbs up from her friend Lynn. She turned to Drew and gave him a nod. As he began playing Ann closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and began singing.

* * * * * * * * * *

Gerry was bored to death, sitting alone in his unfurnished apartment. He had, yet again, pissed off another girl with his philandering ways. His love life had become a pattern. 1) Start to date girl one. 2) Get sick of girl one. 3) Go out and get girl two and keep girl one. 4) Keep girl two when girl one finds out. Then start the process all over again. He hadn’t had a relationship longer than a month in longer than he could remember. Most of his ex-girlfriends hated him; wanted to watch him die. He got lucky with Lisa. Not only had they dated for quite a long time, but she hated him so little that she became his personal assistant. There were times when he wondered how she put up with him.

To add to his boredom, Gerry realized that all of his friends were out of town for the weekend. ‘What to do? What to do?’ he said to himself as he looked out the window. As he looked across the street, he saw a little pub that reminded him of one back in Scotland. Thought he didn’t drink anymore, he was feeling a bit hungry. He grabbed his coat and was out the door.

When he got to the door to the pub, he saw a sign that said there was an open mic night. ‘Great a bar full of drunken people trying to sing.’ He walked in anyway, sat down in a booth at the back, and gave his order of a coke with lime to the waitress. She handed him a menu and walked away.

He looked up from the menu and saw her. The girl on stage was beautiful and he couldn’t help but stare. She looked to be tall, something he liked in a woman. As he looked her up and down, he thought, ‘Damn’. Then suddenly her gaze caught his and he wasn’t just looking at another girl he was going to seduce. She was different. The bar was small enough that he could just see to color of his eyes. They were the most beautiful color of hazel with a bit of green in them. She began to sing but kept her eyes on him, as though she was singing to him.

Driving away from the wreck of the day
And the lights always red in the rearview
Desperately close to a coffin of hope
I’d cheat destiny just to be near you
If this is giving up, then I’m giving up
If this is giving up, then I’m giving up, giving up
On love, on love

Gerry felt a little uncomfortable for a while, but he couldn’t stop staring. He could feel the emotion in her voice as she sang “If this is giving up, then I’m giving up, giving up, on love, on love”. Finally she broke her gaze from him. She began to say as she continued to sing.

Driving away from the wreck of the day
And I’m thinking ‘bout calling on Jesus
‘Cause love doesn’t hurt so I know Im not falling in love
I’m just falling to pieces
And if this is giving up, then I’m giving up
If this is giving up, then I’m giving up, giving up
On love, on love

He could see the tears well up in her eyes as she sang. Her eyes met his as a tear ran down her cheek.

Maybe I’m not up for being a victim of love
All my resistance will never be distance enough

Gerry felt a strange emotion roll over him. He wanted to run up there and catch the tear that she let fall off her jaw. He felt a connection to her. Her voice was hauntingly beautiful, soft and deep. The words she sang touched his heart in a way that no song before had done. He wanted to know her, to know who hurt her so deeply that she cried as she sang. He didn’t know her name, but he felt as though he knew her enough through the song she sang.

Driving away from the wreck of the day
And it’s finally quiet in my head
Driving alone, finally on my way home to the comfort of my bed
And if this is giving up, then I’m giving up
If this is giving up, then I’m giving up, giving up
On love, on love

As she finished her song, there was light applause. He just watched as she walked off stage. He wanted to talk to her, but as he got up, she was pulled to a table by an older man in a nice suit. Gerry didn’t want to interrupt, so he paid for his drink, left a generous tip on the table and left the pub, still a bit dazed by his swirling emotions.

* * * * * * * * * *

When Ann began to sing she was scared shitless. She looked out into the crowd to find something to focus on. Then she found it, a man with two gorgeous green eyes looking right at her. There were plenty of other eyes on her, but there was something about these that pulled her in. They were so gentle and inviting. It was almost like he was saying to her, “Tell me what is wrong and let me help heal your wounds”.

She loosened up. Ann broke her gaze with him. She began to fell the music and she started to sway. She started to feel uncomfortable. Trying her hardest not to think about Adam as she sang the song she wrote about him, she began to cry.

She searched for those tender eyes as the tear ran down her cheek. It was like she could read his thoughts. The look on his face mirrored what she wanted. She wanted him to hold her as she cried. She didn’t know his name, but Ann felt as though they had already met. Ann could feel their emotions running together. She looked at him as though he was the only one in the room, like she was singing only for him.

Ann finished her song, there was light applause. She walked off stage to get a drink and saw him stand up and take a few steps towards her.

Ann grew nervous as she thought about those eyes coming towards her. Just then Drew came up behind her, making her jump a bit. He came with a “suit”, an older man with lost of money. Drew and Ann had a lot of laughs over coffee one night about these people.

“This is Steve James,” Drew said.

“Hello Ms. Nevin,” Mr. James said shaking Ann’s hand and showing her to a table. “You were great out there.”

“Thanks, and please call me Ann.” She was still watching as the green eyes kept walking towards her. Then he stopped.

“I was wondering if you had ever thought about recording a demo,” Mr. James asked.

Ann watched as the green eyes smiled at her and walked away. “What?” she finally replied, still stunned by the smile. “Are you serious?”

“Yes. Your song was beautiful and I would like to help you record a demo and get it out to the record companies.”

“How did you even know I was here?”

“I’ve known Drew for a while and he told me that I had to hear you.”

“Drew?”

“I pulled a few strings and called in a few favors,” Drew replied.

“I would love to record a demo Mr. James. Thank you so much,” Ann said as she hugged him.

“Please call me Steve. Here is my card. Call me tomorrow and set up a meeting and we can get started.” He shook Ann’s hand and turned to leave.

“Thank you again for coming,” she called after him. She turned to Drew, who looked very pleased with himself. “I fucking hate you,” she yelled as she smacked him a few times. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because you would have been too chicken shit to get up there,” he said, rubbing the sting she left on his shoulder.

“Who was that,” Lynn asked as she ran up franticly, “and what just happened?”

“A record producer and he wants me to record a demo!” Ann screamed.

Lynn chimed in and both girls started to jump up and down. It was all Drew could do to keep from calming them down. He knew what Ann had gone through a few months ago and she needed a bit of happiness.

When Ann got back to the tiny two bedroom, four story walk up apartment that she shared with Lynn, she realized she wasn’t tired enough to sleep. She made some coffee and sat out on the fire escape to think. ‘Did that really happen?’ she thought. ‘Am I really going to make a demo? Is that song even good enough?’

“Don’t doubt you talent,” Lynn said. “I don’t, that is why you are staying here practly rent free.”

“But I was so angry when I wrote it. Those songs never work out.”

“No matter what that asshole did to you, he gave you one gift. He gave you a reason to write the best song you have ever written.”

“But I…”

“No buts missy. Give me that coffee and go to bed. You have a big day tomorrow.”

“Thanks mom.” Ann did as she was told but stuck her tongue out at Lynn as she went into her bedroom.

As she got undressed and under the covers, Ann thought about how different her life was compared to three months ago. Back then she was in what she thought was a loving and committed relationship of two years with Adam. Ann would have done anything for him, apart from tattooing his name to her ass. She thought they didn’t have any secrets, more like Adam knew everything about Ann. She thought the feelings were mutual until he got a call from some girl. He was acting all strange and said he would take it in the other room. When Ann decided to take a bit too long to hang up the phone, she caught Adam talking about some ultrasound appointment. ‘Maybe she was talking to his sister,’ she thought. ‘Oh wait, he doesn’t have a sister!’ Ann hung up the phone quietly and waited for Adam to get back. “What was that about?” she asked him.

“Oh, nothing.”

“So you aren’t doing anything tomorrow?”

“What do you mean?”

“I heard you on the phone, Adam. The cat is out of the fucking bag.” Ann got up and walked to the door.

“What do you mean?”

“Is it yours?” Adam gave her a puzzled look. “Is the baby yours?”

“Yes. I was goi...”

“Don’t tell me that you were going to tell me,” she yelled fighting back tears and wiping those that got away from her. “You know you would have kept it a secret for as long as you could have. How long has this been going on?”

“About a year and a half.”

“Are you kidding?” she said not able to hold the tears anymore.

“Please, let me explain,” Adam said reaching for Ann.

“You get to explain nothing. I don’t want to know. I will be back tomorrow. You should be gone by then.”

With that Ann slammed the door. She parked her car in a parking lot and cried her self to sleep. When Ann got back to the apartment she had shared with Adam, he was gone, as was all of his stuff. He had left a note that Ann didn’t even bother to read. She walked into the bedroom, laid on the sheets that still smelled of Adam, and swore off love forever. ‘I will never love again.’ She cried. She packed up all the clothes she could and shoved them in her car. She drove to her parents’ house to give them the keys to the apartment, called her friend Lynn, and drove off to New York to escape everything with not much more than a hundred dollars.

Ann was grateful to Lynn. Lynn took her in when she had no money and no where else to go. When all Ann could do was cry all day, Lynn would be home in the evening to make sure that she would get up and at least eat. After a few weeks, Ann got out of her funk and decided to start a new life. She went out and found a job and got one as a Barista at a Starbucks around the corner. She was trying to help with the rent, although most of the time Lynn just told her to keep it, or that she would have to pay the tab the next time they went out.

As Ann closed her eyes to fall asleep, she realized that she really had everything she wanted. She had a great job, an apartment she shared with her best friend in the whole world, and a chance to make a demo and become a recoding artist. Right before she drifted off, those green eyes popped into her head and for the first time she thought about what her time in New York was missing, love.

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Good Enough