Never Alone | By : pols4elijah Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > Green Day Views: 1287 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know the members of Green Day. I do not make any money from the writing of this story. |
This here is a belated Valentine's fic I wrote. It's part 1 of 2 (The second part containing sex, oral sex and general boy/boy action! XD
Summary: It's Valentine's Day and Tre Cool believes that he's better off alone. That is, until the love of his life comes knocking on his door in the middle of the night.
*****
Trè Cool is better off alone.
He knows it; his brain is telling him so over and over again, so it must be true. The past examples give almost exact proof at his level of competence in relationships; nothing. Zilch. Nadda. Nil. Why should he want to find somebody else, let alone even have feelings for anyone, when he knows it’ll all end in tears?
No, Trè is most definitely better when he’s on his own.
At least, that is what Trè is forcing himself to believe.
He lies on his sofa, his back lying against the soft cushions and breathes a heavy and frustrated sigh into the room. He tightly shuts his eyes as he attempts to clear his thoughts and his hand rises to rub at the creased lines in his forehead. Outside, it is dark and black clouds invade the sky; twinkling stars vanishing beneath the thick blanket. It’s not long into St Valentine’s Day; the biggest event of the past month, it seems, and the one thing that Trè can’t avoid and this adds more to his misery.
It is giving him a headache, this whole ‘love’ ordeal. Valentine’s Day is supposed to be about showing it and this message had almost drowned him since the beginning of the month. But his brain is completely focused on telling him the opposite; what he wants to believe is the truth and that nothing good will come out of following these new…thoughts he’s acquired about a certain somebody in his life.
But, in the depths of his mind, Trè can hear something else.
“Tell him how you feel…”
He sighs again, the pain in his head throbbing as the other half of his mind persists. Hissing slightly in pain, Trè rubs his forehead again.
“It’s not that simple…” he speaks aloud, his weary eyes staring up at the dark ceiling above him; the cracks in paint seeming the only outlet for his thoughts.
“He already has a boyfriend…I’ve left it for too long to redeem myself for when he says no…”
He pauses, his vivid blue eyes flickering in thought.
Yes; the man he’d been practically craving was in a relationship. But it was one that, in Trè’s opinion, wasn’t even worth the effort. He knew that the other guy knew absolutely nothing about his ‘partner’s’ character; knew none of those beautiful qualities that Trè had fallen for long ago. His gorgeous smile, his laugh, his sparkling eyes…
“Besides…” Trè suddenly croaks, breaking his chain of thought sharply “I cope better on my own.”
“Yes, that’s right…alone.”
The room remains silent in reply to the man’s open-thoughts, the rain slowly beginning to tap at the window as the clouds open in the midnight-sky. Trè doesn’t pay heed to it though, not even as it slowly quickens and the thunder booms slightly in the distance. The outside noises get louder but they go unnoticed as Trè simply lies there, swallowed up within his own thoughts; the thoughts which have been plaguing him for almost 3 months.
He swallows, trying in vain to hold back his emotions; the urge to burst into tears forcibly buried in his chest.
“You’ll only hurt him, like you did the others…you have to keep it silent…”
For a moment, Trè remains still, the words echoing in his throbbing head. He licks his dry lips and breathes a shaky sigh. He’s trying to absorb the words, but it won’t be allowed by his sub-conscious.
“But…I love him.”
Trè whispers the words aloud unsteadily, tears slowly seeping below his tired eyes. He hadn’t meant for them to slip out, but…it’d felt…almost heavenly to do it. His breathes come quickly now, the sub-conscious beginning to win over him.
“I love him…” He says again, “I…I love him so much…”
“…Then tell him.”
Trè’s eyes widen then, the unhurried and almost unnoticeable tears running slowly down his warm cheeks. The dark and dreary air is suddenly disturbed then, by a loud ringing. Trè jumps in fright and immediately sits up on the sofa, his head swiftly turning toward the front door.
For a moment, he stares at the pine and listens to his quick breaths slow brush from his lips. He wipes his damp eyes with the back of his hand and stands up on shaky legs. He’s drawn sluggishly and almost unwillingly to the door; a puppet on his mind’s strings being dragged across the front room.
Just as he approaches the door, Trè hears a voice and stops dead on the wooden floor.
“Trè? Are you there? Please!”
The voice is undeniably recognisable and Trè gasps, breaking into a light sprint and hurling himself at the locks on the door, attempting his best to unlock them smoothly.
Soon, he gets them all undone and he immediately pulls open the door, gasping a little for breath and tightening his grip on the pine.
***
“I’m sorry for coming round at such a late hour…and without calling or anything…” he starts timidly, perched on the sofa with a towel draped over his shoulders. His raven-toned hairs falls damp by his eyes, which are vivid, yet dull as the night sky with sadness.
“It’s OK, Billie.” Trè answers quietly.
He’s standing before Billie on the sofa, he arms folded around him securely, as if to protect himself subconsciously from the turmoil Billie’s ready to throw in his direction.
The said man sighs and runs his hand through the wet hairs hovering over his eyes, looking up and revealing the jade-green stare that Trè can never seem to resist.
“Tim threw me out.” The petite man says clearly, his voice quiet but unnerved but his emotions.
Trè sighs wearily too, shifting his feet a little in awkwardness. Billie continues, his voice becoming that little shakier with each sentence that falls from his lips.
“We had a fight…I ended up telling him h-how I didn’t like his attitude and …he got angry because it was so close to Valentine’s…”
Trè lets his tired body move downward and he sits on the carpeted floor.
“What else did he say?” The Autumn-coloured haired man asks.
“It doesn’t matter…” Billie answers sadly. “It’s over.”
Billie Joe bites his lip and averts his eyes to the dark carpet, swallowing down a sob and clenching his fingers into the worn material of his jeans.
As he watches Billie’s form; downcast, heavy and weary with sadness, the voices begin to fade back into Trè’s head.
“Of course he doesn’t love you…”
“He only wants comfort for himself…”
“He’ll forget it tomorrow, you’ll see…”
“Trè?”
The chestnut-haired man flicks his head up at the sound of his name, blinking the voices away as he’s met with Billie’s shimmering green eyes once again.
“What?” he asks quietly, clearing his throat.
“I just…well, I know it’s sorta…impolite…but is it OK if I stay here tonight?” Billie Joe asks timidly, his fingers gripping and twisting the damp material of his jeans anxiously.
For a moment, Trè’s eyes slowly move down in thought and as the voices begin to play once again, Billie speaks.
“It’ll only be for this…tonight, I-…I swear. Tim…I-..he needs time to… calm down, you know? I don’t want to… intrude, but…”
As Billie’s pitiful voice fades away, it is replaced by the return of the echoing calls in Trè’s head.
“Don’t do it…He’s using you…”
The younger man moves his head up slowly then and looks directly at his friend sat above him and breaths an unstable sigh.
“I…I’m not sure if-…if you really mean it, though…”
Billie blinks, certainly a little surprised by Trè’s uneasiness but the younger man continues.
“Valentines Day is supposed to be about spending time with the one you love…and, well…I know you love Tim so…well, you can’t give up on everything you two had after some fight, you know?” he explains, his heart practically tearing in two as the words spill from his mouth.
For a moment, Billie Joe moves his dull and weary eyes to the coffee table by his legs and he lets a tired sigh loose from his mouth, his shoulders slumping and his hand running through and stopping to bare the weight of his forehead.
“You don’t get it…” he replies, hushed and rubbing small circles into his sore head. “It wasn’t…wasn’t just ‘some fight’.”
He sadly strokes the soaked denim of his jeans with his free hand and refuses to move his eyes from Trè’s grave blues as he speaks.
“I can’t go back there, Trè. Not after what’s happened, can’t you see that? Tim and I…We lost what we had a long, long time ago.”
He smirks miserably and briefly to himself.
“He just never realised it…”
“All the same, Billie. I’m not sure if-”
Trè begins his decision gradually and quietly, but it seems too forced onto him and he can’t form the sentences the voices so badly crave him to say. He swallows and his chest tightens as he sees small droplets of tears form at the brim of Billie’s eyelids.
He watches in silence as the jade-green slowly looses hope and averts again, moving down to gaze at the floor. A tear is pushed off the edge and it sparkles as it falls to the carpet.
Trè gasps silently at the sight; beautiful yet crushing to see at the same time. The voices in his head are suddenly pushed away and the quiet whisper from before is increased in volume.
“Help him. Tell him…Let him know how much you love him…”
A small rustle of movement as Trè pushes himself onto his knees, at Billie’s feet. The quiet yet quick intake of breath as Billie tries in vain to control his crying. The silent stream of tears, now falling down a cold and broken face; these are the only sounds Trè can hear now and it seems like they’re even louder still, as there are no more orders or callings in his head.
“Please, Trè.” Billie begs quietly, now looking at Trè’s knees in front of him.
It’s so fascinating to watch but the somewhat pathetic sight of Billie breaking down shatters Trè ‘s already crushed heart and he lets curiosity take over; his right hand rises up as he sits back on his haunches and cradles Billie’s damp cheek, the skin silky beneath his fingertips. Billie keeps his saddened gaze to the ground but still leans in slightly, almost unconsciously, to Trè’s gesture.
“Please…”
He recognises a pleading in that voice, so rare that it makes Trè’s chest clench as he hears it; desperation.
“I…I can’t go back…” Billie sniffs quietly, still facing downward. “I can’t because…because if-…if I do…”
Billie finally moves then, shifting his heavy head up to look at the sky blue of Trè’s eyes. He shivers slightly as he feels Trè’s breath close to his face, but not at all in an uncomfortable way.
“…I’d be living a lie.” he finishes with a whisper.
Trè frowns slightly in confusion at Billie’s confession.
“What do you mean?” he whispers, stroking Billie’s soft cheek with his thumb.
A slight pause follows and the two friends stare at each other gently. Trè can feel his eyelids becoming heavy with an unfamiliar yet secretly craved desire and he beholds Billie’s beautiful frame from a half-lidded vision. He gasps quietly as he sees a shimmering jade as bright as an emerald.
“I mean…” Billie begins quietly and he’s moving ever so slowly forward now, inching closer and closer toward Trè, whose insides jump as he realises the closeness between the two. But, he makes no move in turning away. Instead, he lets his hand move subconsciously to take a soft hold of the back of Billie’s neck, his fingers lightly stroking the fine black hairs they find there. Billie licks his lips a little and takes in a deep breath at Trè’s touch, his eyes too beginning to fall to a close.
“…this.”
Slowly and beautifully, the two are connected as Billie closes the gap between them. It’s a kiss so light that Trè feels as if he’s amongst clouds. Both pairs of eyes close and Trè gently deepens the kiss by lightly parting Billie’s lips with his tongue and his hands venture slowly to Billie’s back, stroking his palms across the soft material of a t-shirt. Billie moans from deep in the back of his throat and Trè smiles shyly at this, his hands moving of their own accord now and delving underneath Billie’s top.
The kiss breaks apart then and Billie arches his body toward Trè’s hands, like a cat with his master. He moves in to latch his lips onto Trè’s neck, but it suddenly aware that there are palms on his chest pushing him away slightly. He looks up to see Trè’s face riddled with confusion and what seems to be grief; his normally bright blue eyes shimmering amongst a thick layer of tears.
“How do I know you’re telling me the truth?” he blurts out, louder than he possibly intended and his fingers gripping at Billie Joe’s t-shirt like a newborn to its mother.
“How do I know you aren’t just looking for revenge?”
Billie gasps lightly as he watches the tears slowly spill over Trè’s eyelids, just as his had done earlier. He’s at a loss for words at the sight before him; he’s never seen Trè in such a vulnerable and pitiful state before and it makes his heart clench and twist with sadness for him.
“B-Billie…I love you. I love you …so much. I couldn’t bear it if I k-knew you were only…here…to get back at him…” Trè begins almost uncontrollably now, the voices in his head rising again and spilling the words from the young man’s lips.
“I’m s-sorry I never told you, Billie…but...”
He’s silenced by a finger pressing to his lips and Billie stares at his tear-ridden eyes deeply.
“Sssshh…” he whispers. “Trè it’s OK…”
Billie enhances his words with a kiss to Trè’s neck and the said man gasps at the sensation; the sweet and soft pressing of Billie Joe’s lips on his skin melting his entire body as he surrenders to what he’s been so badly craving for too long.
“I love you…” he says in a strangled whisper, his eyes closing slowly as Billie continues to kiss and relax him.
“I love you too.” Billie murmurs in reply, his voice muffled by the younger man’s skin.
Trè lets a small groan fall from his mouth and his head tips back against Billie’s hand, which has risen up his back to cradle Trè’s head like a young child’s. He can smell Billie’s cologne and it’s driving him even more lust-ridden as the fumes rises up his nostrils and hits his senses. It’s the smell he’s adored in secret; the smell of Billie.
He can feel Billie breathing slowly against his neck as the kisses finally come to an end and the love-struck young man can’t help in letting a small whine of need escape.
“Billie…” he whispers, his still eyes closed.
Then, he hears movement and moves his head forward slightly to the pressure of Billie’s hand pushing gently. He then shivers as he feels Billie Joe’s breathes against his mouth.
“Happy Valentines…” Billie Joe whispers.
End of Part 1
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