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Fear
By : angelgirl1242
Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > Silverchair
Views: 935 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0Disclaimer: This is pure fiction. I do not know Daniel Johns or David Helfgott. No money is being made from this writing. - Chapter List
- 1
“He’s kissing you and rubbing you. And there was this one time he grabbed my dick. He didn’t know that he was doing it. I was just standing there, a little uncomfortable. But he’s really nice.”
-Daniel Johns on David Helfgott
He smiles and the smile lights up his face. For a second, somewhere behind the pain, innocence still glimmers. I want to hang onto that flicker, my mind frantically searching for some way to keep that smile on his face. My head rests gently on one of his thin arms, a slight concern that even this action would cause him pain; positioning myself so I can’t see his face. If I’m watching him when that flicker dies, something inside me will die too.
From my new vantage point I can see his hands fly across the piano keys. When he asked of he could play around with it I wasn’t expecting him to demonstrate such ease. I’d be lying if I said that I’m not jealous.
“Good,” I ruffle his hair; ignoring the itch in my fingers that suddenly, and quite desperately, want to touch more than these dirty locks. I hold my breath, but the itch doesn’t go away and somewhere, below my belt, blood is rushing to areas that I would rather ignore.
“Thanks. I took lessons as a kid,” he smiles.
I move away from his shoulder long enough to whisper a few inside jokes into his ear. I was afraid that the interaction would arouse suspicion, but only good humour shines on his handsome face. I whisper again and he laughs; it’s a beautiful sound. I revel in it even as I am, once again, reminded of the growing discomfort between my legs. I reach out and touch his hair. My touch my touch must be different because he tenses under the probing fingers.
“David--”
My mouth kills the protest on his lips. He struggles, attempting to throw me off him. It’s useless. The other battle that he’s engaged with, the one with anorexia nervosa, makes it impossible. Underneath us, the piano bench crashes to the floor. My mouth never leaves his, although I do open my eyes sometime during the kiss. I find myself staring into shocked blue eyes. My hand reaches up to caress his face.
“Shhh.” I continue to caress his face to calm him while my other hand locks his wrists above his head. “It’s okay. I’m not going to hurt you. I’m going to love you.”
“Please--”
He whimpers. It sounds like a protest or a plea. He needs this too. My ego grows when I think about our position. I get to show him love. Inside, I swear I feel my heart burst. The hand that had been soothing him moves low enough to passionately rip the pants from his slender hips. He cries out from under me and I stroke his bare hip, feeling the bone under the baby-soft skin. I claim his lips again, nibbling the full bottom lip, while I push down his underclothes. He squirms against me.
Wetting my finger with my mouth, I coax his legs apart with my own. Once his knees are splayed far enough part, that’s the finger that I use to search for his entrance. The task isn’t an easy one but I find it. He cries out as my fingers push into his body. It takes all my strength to him under me. Shit, I should have known that this would be his first time with a man!
When I finally enter him, with my manhood, my weight holds him nicely in place. I feel almost too good to think. His body is so tight. So beautiful. I stroke all the bare skin I can reach. I spend myself so fast. Guilt flushes my face. He probably didn’t get much out of it. I pull out of him; movements as gentle as possible. His face is a blur to my exhausted eyes.
Epilogue:
I guess I had fallen asleep because I wake up on top of him. Daniel is asleep underneath me and I take the opportunity to check him. His rosebud looks so sore; a pang of guilt squeezes my heart. I lay back down, waiting for him to wake. From the corner of my eye, I see something shiny on his face. Curiosity pushing me to investigate, I gently cup his face, moving it towards me. My eyes widened with growing horror. There are tears on his face. Frightened blue eyes open, and, for a second, there’s nothing behind the fear. For a second, I swear, I see only emptiness.
The End- 1
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