New York, New York | By : addykins1989 Category: Individual Celebrities > Tom Hiddleston Views: 3272 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: I make no money for writing this piece of fiction, nor do I own Tom Hiddleston *le sigh* |
Chapter One
Anna took a deep calming breath as she watched the set in front of her. She was in downtown New York in Rockefeller Center, waiting anxiously for her cue to step on set. She had been completely at ease until she’d arrived at the studio to see none other than Tom Hiddleston chatting with Matt Lauer. Tom Hiddleston was as much the imaginary love of her life as he was the bane of her existence. The charming Brit had fueled her fantasies for over a year, ever since the release of the first Thor film. To know that he was in the same room as her made her feel extremely exposed and as skittish as a colt, even though the man had no way of knowing the effect he had on her. Anna had vowed to not give herself away…though she wasn’t sure how long that would last if the those damn blue eyes didn’t stop flicking in her direction. He’s just curious, nothing more. Anna almost laughed aloud at the idea that Tom would be interested in her. He’s here to do an interview, nothing more. Get a grip Anna, it’s not like he’s going to lock eyes with you and decide he has to chase after you. That only happens in movies. Damn it, why can’t my life be a movie? Anna sighed as she listened to Tom’s voice as he spoke to Matt, waiting for the next commercial break and his portion of the interview to begin. Anna took the opportunity to bury her head in her notes, pretending to go over them to avoid the temptation of gawking at the Brit. Only a small segment remained before Tom would take the stage and just after that, Anna would follow. Why couldn’t they have them come on separately? She could probably handle the idea of him watching her offset much better than sitting across from the man. Why, why, why?! Curse you, universe!“Good morning,” that velvet voice greeted her, jarring her discombobulated brain back into focus. Thoroughly startled, she couldn’t help but stare at the man. Dressed impeccably in a black three piece suit and black and blue striped tie with his ginger hair swept back off his face, he was a lovely sight amidst the dreary studio set. “I’m Tom.” He offered a dazzling smile and his hand which Anna accepted with a small smile, doing her best to remember what words were. Collecting herself, she quickly pulled off her glasses and shoved them into her purse before taking his hand.
“Good morning,” she managed, returning the smile. “I’m Anna.”
“Yes, you’re the therapist. My publicist keeps me well informed.” Tom gave another smile at her astounded look. He knew her work? Oh lord, this just got ten times worse.
“As he should,” Anna laughed lightly. “Knowledge is power after all.”
“Truest words I know,” Tom echoed her laugh with his own. Hearing his ebullient ‘ehehehe’ in countless interviews couldn’t have prepared her for hearing it from right beside her. It was absolutely adorable, and utterly devastating to her well-being. And he was ginger! She loved that look on him. It did unspeakable things to her, and the scruff on his strong jaw was decidedly not helping. Damn him. “Are you nervous?” his voice pulled her from her silent assessment of him, catching her off guard again.
“A little,” Anna admitted. “I’ve done plenty of web interviews for the book, but I’ve never been on national television.”
“Ah,” Tom nodded politely as a man gestured for him. It was nearly time for his segment of their joint interview. “It’s not so bad. Excuse me.” He winked at her as he strode off confidently to be outfitted with his mike. Anna looked away, determined not to gawk. He’d winked at her! It was nothing Anna, don’t get worked up over it. He’s just trying to help me feel better.
When Tom had arrived at the studio, he’d known only that the woman appearing with him was a sex therapist promoting her new book. Luke had been able to provide him with a modicum of information on the doctor, namely her impressive resume. Her resume paled in comparison when he had seen her across the room. Tall and lithe, Doctor Anna Fowler was far from what he’d imagined in his mind. He’d expected some middle-aged woman with glasses and a knitted sweater in a ghastly purple. But the reality was welcome, and quite attractive as he spied her nibbling daintily on a triangle of toast from the catering table. She’s adorable. She appeared nervous, or at the very least distracted. Letting his eyes drift back to the anchorman he was supposed to be listening to, he tried to ignore the siren across the room. How was he supposed to listen to her talk about sex and not turn into a doddering idiot? Luke must be torturing me for something. Once Matt had taken his leave, he fished his phone from his pocket and sent a quick text to his publicist, knowing he would be awake. His phone vibrated immediately, and he smiled to himself as he unlocked the device.
*No Tom, I am not torturing you. Why do you ask?* Tom snorted to himself as he considered Luke’s reply. Maybe he hadn’t known the woman was young and beautiful.
*She’s bloody gorgeous, you sod. I swear you did this on purpose.* He pocketed his phone once again, looking over at Doctor Fowler again. Her brown hair hung down to her shoulder blades, pulled back from her face in a loose bun with tendrils framing her face. He did a quick once over, eyeing her athletic form with hungry eyes. His phone vibrating pulled him from his gawking and after glancing around the room nonchalantly, he opened his new message.
*The therapist?* was the simple reply.
*Yes the therapist, who else? She could pass for a naughty librarian, and I have to listen to her talk about God knows what without embarrassing myself. It’s not fair.* Ok, maybe he was overreacting a bit. But he was a hot-blooded single male in the presence of a beautiful woman. There were no excuses to be made for him at times like this.
*Tom I’m not interested in what you think about in your free time, but try to focus okay? Interview first, shameless flirting after.* Tom scoffed, tapping out a quick response.
*I’m just trying to give you a heads up in case I make a fool of myself.* Tom didn’t have to wait long for a response.
*Stop making dirty jokes and focus on why you’re there. I didn’t book this interview so you could drool over a woman.* Tom sighed and put his phone away in frustration. His segment was rapidly approaching and he knew she was meant to follow him. Maybe if he talked to her first he could get somewhat comfortable with her before things got…undoubtedly weird. He glanced over at the doctor who was engrossed in her notes, a pair of reading glasses perched on her button nose. Gritting his teeth, Tom dove for his phone, seeking distraction of any kind.
*SHE EVEN HAS GLASSES LUKE* he felt better after sending the message, looking anywhere in the room but at the woman. His phone vibrated in his hand and he checked it immediately.
*Bet you’re wishing she was an old woman in a purple sweater aren’t you?* Luke’s sarcastic tone was not lost on Tom, who was indeed wishing this cruel prank would end and the real Doctor Fowler would appear. But that wasn’t going to happen, and he needed to prepare himself for the inevitable. *Just talk to her. You’re overthinking things.* Luke’s new text advised him. Right. He could do this. Tucking his phone away, he made his way over to her and greeted her casually. She jumped slightly before she turned to look at him, pulling her glasses off her nose and tucking them into her purse before taking his outstretched hand.
“Good morning. I’m Anna.” She returned his smile, making his nerves flutter.
“Yes, you’re the therapist. My publicist keeps me well informed.” He said smoothly. The hell he does, the bloody wanker.
“As he should,” Anna gave a soft laugh. “Knowledge is power after all.” She gave a cheeky grin and he had to return it.
“Truest words I know,” he laughed with her, captivated by her quiet charms. “Are you nervous?” He asked, wanting to put both her and himself at ease. He hoped upon hope she didn’t discuss anything graphic; if she did his public image would most likely be shot to hell.
“A little,” Anna admitted noncommittally. “I’ve done plenty of web interviews for the book, but I’ve never been on national television.”
“Ah,” Tom nodded politely as a man gestured for him. His time with Anna was over. “It’s not so bad. Excuse me.” In a bold move, he winked at her as he strode off to the sound technician to attach a mike to his shirt. Anna watched on with interest as Tom walked onto the set, confidence clear in his gait. He answered Matt and Kate’s questions with ease, completely comfortable in the moment. Damn him. Then again this is probably his millionth and a half interview. She was about to retreat to the bathroom to collect her nerves (for the twentieth time) when a techie flagged her across the room to pin her mike on her shirt. So much for that…
The show cut to commercial and Anna’s blood pressure sky rocketed. She felt like she was walking to her doom; in a matter of minutes she would be face to face with Tom god-damn Hiddleston talking about BDSM relationships. Could there be anything more embarrassing?! Oh god, I need a drink…I knew I should have put vodka in my water bottle.
“This way miss. We’re ready for you.” The sound technician said, ushering her toward the set and her plush arm chair as Matt and Tom were laughing about something. “We’re back on two.” The technician said, retreating from the set and giving a thumbs up to the cameraman. Oh god, two minutes! Oooohmyyyygoooood…ok Anna, you can do this. Just breathe! Everything will be fine-holy hell why is the cameraman counting?! Has it been two minutes already?!
“Please welcome our next guest, Doctor Anna Fowler.” Matt introduced her and Anna took a deep breath as her first national television appearance started. Sitting in the same room as Tom Hiddleston was not helping. She felt like her insides were made of J-ello, just because she knew he was watching her with interest. Don’t do anything stupid, don’t do anything stupid. “Doctor Fowler is a sex therapist here in New York and author of her first book, Full Exposure: Opening Up to Sexual Creativity and Erotic Expression. As you all know, the practice of BDSM is under fire by many people calling this kind of expression degrading. Doctor Fowler, can you explain this subculture to us? What exactly does it mean to be involved in a BDSM exchange?” Fuck, here we go. Can’t believe I’m talking about this in front of my go-to fantasy guy. Why did I ever think it was a good idea to become a sex therapist?
“BDSM encompasses a variety of erotic practices involving dominance and submission, role-playing, restraint, and other interpersonal dynamics. Many people engage in BDSM behaviors without even realizing it. Given the wide range of practices, inclusion in the BDSM community is usually dependent on self-identification and shared experience. Interest in BDSM can range from one-time experimentation to a lifestyle, and there is debate over whether a BDSM or kink sexual identity also constitutes a form of sexual orientation.” Anna made the mistake of letting her eyes drift away from Matt and Katie to Tom, who sat with his back straight and his eyes at rapt attention on her. And his fucking legs splayed open. As usual.
“So when you say wide range of practices…what all does that include?” Katie asked, drawing Anna away from Tom’s hypnotizing eyes.
“The three main aspects of the culture are bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, and sadism and masochism. A person might identify chiefly with one aspect, but that’s not to say they don’t enjoy bits and pieces from another. Everyone identifies differently, and the majority of BDSM communities are very open and accepting of this fact.” Anna answered.
“So there are no set definitions,” Tom spoke up, looking up from her breasts as Anna looked back at him. He really didn’t want to be caught ogling her, even though he could swear he’d caught her ogling him. Now that she was under the bright lighting of the set, he was able to see her much better. She was truly beautiful, there was no denying that. He could see the red tint in her hair now. Her warm amber eyes drew him in and those damn legs and breasts of hers made it extremely difficult to focus. Her stylish clothing accentuated her curvy physique, from the black leather high heeled boots that enclosed her calves, the black pants that clung to her skin, all the way up to the deep blue top she wore. The sleek material gave off a metallic sheen under the set lighting, and the color offset her skin tone perfectly. The sleeves she’d rolled up and buttoned, exposing her soft forearms, which made him want to see more. The collar she’d left unbuttoned, along with the top two buttons, so he could just barely see the tantalizing beginnings of cleavage.
“Correct,” Anna graced him with a smile and he returned it happily, enjoying the glow her smile brought to her face. “The precise definition of roles and self-identification is a common subject of debate within the communities. For example, in the Dom/sub aspect, people who fluctuate from the dominant to submissive role are known as switches, but a lot of people within the community find the term derogatory. It puts too simple a label on something much more complex.”
“As I said, there are some groups that are saying this kind of behavior is barbaric and degrading, especially for women who identify as submissives.” Matt said. Anna chuckled at that; how backwards.
“Not at all; those women make the choice to allow someone, whether it’s a male or female, to dominate them,” she smiled cryptically. “These people, while not necessarily female, do in fact give their consent to a person they trust to take care of them. Consent is the backbone of the BDSM community. Without consent, that is where you get into barbarism. There have been recent studies that show people involved in a BDSM lifestyle to be less likely to commit violent crimes than say…a man who has had no involvement in that lifestyle. What we derive from this data is that people involved in BDSM practices are able to act out their darker urges in a safe environment, with a willing participant. Everything is based on mutual trust, just like any other relationship.”
“Within the book, there is a chapter where you touch on the best-selling novel Fifty Shades of Grey and I have to say I was rather surprised by your opinion on the work.” Katie said.
“Ah yes,” Anna gave a light chuckle, lightly scratching her face. “E. L. James and I are not on the best of terms, suffice to say.” She replied.
“Having read the book I already know the answer, but can you explain to our viewers why you took such a strong stance against the books?” Katie asked.
“E. L. James did not give her readers an accurate representation of a BDSM relationship. In her novel, the exchange is controlled by Christian Grey. Anastasia is extremely innocent, especially concerning BDSM experiences. I was disturbed by the fact that Christian sort of lulled her into the world of BDSM; it can be extremely overwhelming and it’s something you should ease into.” Anna said firmly.
“The pair did actually ‘set limits’ as you said a couple should. What exactly was it that you disagreed with?” Matt asked.
“The thing we have to keep in mind is that limits are the same as rules. Some are flexible, some are not. Soft limits are the rules you’re willing to bend. Hard limits are non-negotiable,” Anna shook her head. “In Fifty Shades of Grey, both Christian and Anastasia set their limits; they even signed a contract to that effect. Yet almost immediately, Christian showed an utter lack of disregard for Anastasia’s hard limits when he pushed her to do what he wanted. This is not an accurate portrayal and only fuels the fire against BDSM practices,” Anna sighed. “Contrary to what people might think, in a BDSM exchange-especially in a D/s partnership, the submissive holds all the power. On the surface these interactions appear to be putting the submissive down, but this isn’t true,” Anna shook her head. “In truth, while the submissive gives his or her dominant power over them, the dominant can only act within certain parameters that they and the submissive have worked out before hand.”
“So you could say that the dominant is a caregiver of sorts.” Matt summarized.
“In a way, yes. The dominant is a provider. They know what their partner needs and are happy to take care of those needs, and they do have freedom to choose the way they do so as long as they stay within their predetermined boundaries. Christian Grey is not a good example of a dominant because he is constantly pushing Anastasia to do what he wants.”
“But in the later books Christian did take very good care of Anastasia.” Katie pointed out.
“To an extent, yes, but we need to examine his behavior as a whole. Christian is very controlling and possessive of Anastasia, which are usually seen as red flags in any relationship. He comes from a tragic past so he does feel that need to control everything around him, especially women; all of which resemble his birth mother in some fashion. Any psychologist would tell you that this is not the type of person you would want to be involved with. People with those sort of issues rarely have healthy relationships.” Anna said firmly.
“What type of person would make the best dominant? Is there a certain type of personality or trait that they all share?” Tom asked, regaining Anna’s attention. He could swear he saw a faint blush along her cheek bones, and his inner self grinned like a Cheshire cat.
“The best dominants are very sympathetic, sensitive people. It’s very important that the dominant is in sync with their submissive in order to take of their needs,” Anna explained. “Whereas controlling and apathetic individuals are very ill-suited for the dominant role.”
“Can I ask how you identify?” Tom asked, his tone slightly shy. He was pushing her, he knew, but he was burning with curiosity.
“Guess.” Anna requested, meeting his gaze levelly. He gave a smile, and Anna could swear she melted inside.
“Are you the dominant one?” he asked, intrigued by the faint rise of color on her cheeks.
“Only if you ask very, very nicely,” Anna grinned, allowing a hint of mischief to color her eyes. “I’m actually a submissive.”
“So how exactly does that work?” Katie asked. “I mean, what all does a dominant do?”
“It varies from person to person really…there’s a sliding scale, so it can range from being only slightly controlling to completely controlling, say…what your submissive is allowed to wear in public or how they can wear their hair.”
“Would you be willing to give a small demonstration? Nothing too explicit, just to give us kind of an idea of what the dynamic is like.” Matt said. Anna was shocked by the request, her brain crashing to a stop at the idea of Tom seeing her like that.
“Um…I didn’t bring anyone with me…” she started. Once again she mistakenly looked directly at Tom, whose eyes had darkened just a touch. “Normally I wouldn’t do anything like that with someone I didn’t know, but I guess I could make an exception,” Tom stared at her in awe, equally startled by her gall and turned on. Don’t do it, Tom. Don’t say anything…
“I don’t know much about it, but I could try.” he offered semi-awkwardly, inwardly cursing himself as he spoke. Why the hell did he have to open his mouth? Fuck, Luke is going to be furious. Across from him, Anna was having an internal panic attack and nearly killing herself to seem calm on the outside.
OHMYGODOHMYGODTOMFUCKINGHIDDLESTONWANTS TODOMINATEMEOHMYGODYOUIDIOTSAYYES!!!!! NONONONONONO!! NOTONTVYOUSTUPIDFUCK!! OHMYGODSAYSOMETHING!!
Anna cleared her throat, trying not to squirm as desire lanced her core, already imagining what was about to happen.
“Ok, so um…” Anna struggled to extract words from her panic and desire swamped brain. Keep it together, Anna. Do NOT embarrass yourself in front of Tom Hiddleston! “So normally,” Anna attempted to begin her explanation as she did her best to seem natural and not like her insides had turned to what she imagined a star felt like before it exploded. “Before anything happened,” she took a deep composing breath. You can do this! You can talk about sex with Tom Hiddleston like a normal, functioning adult…that hasn’t gotten off to thoughts of him a million plus times…not to mention your near instant orgasm when you watched The Deep Blue Sea and saw practically all of him naked. Hnn… “Tom and I would have a discussion about what is and isn’t okay, we would each be able to set our limits; I would tell him what I’m comfortable with,” Anything…-“And he would tell me what he’s comfortable doing.” Oh honey, you can do anything you fucking want to me.
“So Tom will have total control.” Matt said. OHMYGODYESPLEASE!!!
“Yes,” Anna replied. “The submissive doesn’t do anything unless they’re told. In some cases the submissive isn’t allowed to speak unless the dominant says they can.” she glanced over at Tom, who was regarding her pensively. HOLYFUCKINGSHITTHATLOOKI’DKILLTOKNOWWHATHE’STHINKINGRIGHTNOW!!!
Tom watched Anna unabashedly, taking note of the small squirms that seemingly went unnoticed by Matt and Katie. She was enjoying this! Nervous as he was about being in such tricky territory, he was curious to see how this would play out. What is going through her head right now? Glancing at Matt and Katie, he realized he should probably take control-of Anna- and the situation.
“I just have a few more questions for you-”
“Anna,” Tom said, interrupting Katie’s tangent. Anna’s eyes flickered to his, and he could see that her pupils were dilated and gave a small smirk. You can do this, Tom. It’s just a role…with a gorgeous woman who will probably do whatever I tell her. Fuck. He held up his hand and beckoned her with a finger. “Come,” Anna swallowed, making no move to get up as her eyes bored into his. OHMYGODIT’SSTARTINGFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKINGFUCK Tom raised a brow at her, showing impatience, and Anna held her breath as she got to her feet and crossed to his side of the room, stopping in front of him. Tom realized she was waiting for him to give her another command, so he told her to turn around. “On your knees.” he said smoothly, watching as Anna complied. When she’d sat back on her haunches at his feet, he leaned forward and threaded his fingers through her loose hair, pulling her head back slightly when he’d fisted a handful of the auburn locks, and Anna’s core throbbed headily. OHGODPLEASEPULLHARDER… As if he’d read her mind, Tom tightened his grip on her hair and as she felt the minute sting in her scalp she allowed her eyes to slip closed for a brief moment and she swallowed, trying to control her rapidly rising heart rate.
Tom felt like he was having an out-of-body experience as he looked down at Anna with her eyes closed, his eyes following the movement of muscles down her throat as she swallowed. To have this beautiful woman at his feet, under his hand…and enjoying it? His cock twitched in his lap, thankfully hidden in this position. Maybe if I-No no no no no! Shut up brain! Don’t even think about it.
“Um…back to my question: you don’t find the idea of being controlled demeaning?” Katie asked, clearing her throat and dragging Tom’s attention away from Anna for a brief second before he looked back at her. Anna’s warm honey eyes shot up to his, asking permission to speak. He gave it with a subtle nod, turning her head slightly so she looked at Katie.
“Not if it’s by someone I trust. This instance is different because I don’t know Tom personally, but by giving permission a submissive gives their dominant free reign over their will. That’s not something anyone should give lightly; there need to be rules in place, and both partners need to know what they are and are not okay with. Consent and safety are the most important things.”
“What about the people who call BDSM abuse? What would you say to them?”
“A healthy BDSM relationship is completely consensual. In an abusive relationship, the victim has no say, no control over what is done to them. There is no direct connection between BDSM and abuse…” Anna trailed off as Tom’s hand flexed, slightly tightening his hold on her hair and making her scalp tingle. Hnn…
“Anna.” Tom cajoled her softly, snapping her back to reality. His hold loosened and she was able to focus again.
“Right, sorry,” Anna flushed, smiling embarrassedly. “If we look at the psychology of both BDSM participants and abuse survivors there are major differences. The submissive is able to opt out if things get to be too much for them, whereas a victim of abuse has no say.”
“Well, thank you very much for being with us, Doctor Fowler, Mr. Hiddleston; that’s all the time we have for today.” Katie said.
“Have a good day everyone, and we’ll see you tomorrow morning.” Matt signed off and the camera man gave the cut off sign. Tom released his hold on Anna’s hair and offered her his hand to help her to her feet. Anna didn’t meet his eyes, but accepted his hand as she stood up. Did I do something wrong? Anna made a beeline off stage, stopping at the small reception table and grabbing a bottle of water. Tom followed, still intrigued by this woman, coming to a stop next to her at the table.
“You seem flustered.” he said without preamble, causing Anna to nearly choke on her sip of water.
“I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t.” she replied honestly with a coughing laugh, daintily dabbing away a droplet of water on her lip with the pad of her finger.
“I hope I didn’t do anything wrong.” he offered, breathing a small sigh of relief when Anna shook her head.
“No, no, nothing like that.” she assured him with a small smile.
“Oh good; I’ve never done anything remotely like that before.” Tom smiled and Anna gave a faint laugh, resting her hand on the table. Tom’s eyes jumped to the surface, which was level with her hips. Perfect height…shut up!
“Could’ve fooled me,” Anna said, getting his mind out of the gutter. “You just kinda ran with it, I’m impressed.” Tom shrugged, pinning her with a playful look.
“That’s what actors do,” he teased, his eyes darkening slightly. “We’re very good at reading people.” he added, and Anna knew she’d been caught. He knew. He must have seen her checking him out. Fuck! Now what do I do? Wait…he enjoyed it too! He’s been staring at me since I came on set! Two can play at this game…
“So are therapists,” she said cordially, grinning when he looked taken aback. “I was thinking of going for an early lunch, would you like to join me?” she offered boldly. OH GOD I just asked Tom Hiddleston out!!
“Um…” Tom checked his watch, brightening when he realized he had nearly three hours to kill before he needed to be at the airport. “I have some time to kill…what did you have in mind?” You could bend me over the table and fuck me senseless…
“Does the Carnegie deli sound good? It’s not far from here,” Anna suggested, mentally slapping herself as more dirty thoughts ran rampant through her brain. No suggesting you straddle his face…or Loki roleplaying! Oh god, I honestly might die of embarrassment… Tom grinned when he noticed a slow blush covering Anna’s cheeks. What was she thinking about? Did she really enjoy having her hair pulled that much?
A/N: The real author of the book mentioned in this chapter is Susie Bright. Also, I pictured Anna looking like Elena Satine. Please let me know what you think!While AFF and its agents attempt to remove all illegal works from the site as quickly and thoroughly as possible, there is always the possibility that some submissions may be overlooked or dismissed in error. The AFF system includes a rigorous and complex abuse control system in order to prevent improper use of the AFF service, and we hope that its deployment indicates a good-faith effort to eliminate any illegal material on the site in a fair and unbiased manner. This abuse control system is run in accordance with the strict guidelines specified above.
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