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Ms Self Destruct	By : TrentReznorsSin Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > Nine Inch Nails Views: 3298 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know the members of Nine Inch Nails. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Title:
Ms Self Destruct
Author: TrentReznorsSin
Disclaimer: Trent unfortunately doesn’t belong to me *sobs* (do you really think I’d be sat at my PC if I owned him?? Lol) but Erin and some other people you won’t recognise belong to moi. I’m a poor uni student so don’t sue, I’m not making anything out of this!
Summary: Set during the Self Destruct Tour 94/95. Trent’s decision to ask his best friend Erin to come along for the tour has made them both ask the question ‘are we just friends?’
Feedback: Yes please, no flames though, they make me cry
Author's note: This is the first NIN fiction I’ve written in years, so I might be a bit rusty.
Thank you to those who read and review and as always a huge thank you to Danu *mwah*
I know its been a while since I last updated, I've been so busy with going back to uni etc etc so I apologise. Enjoy chapter nine!
Chapter Nine: She Makes Me Real
Trent woke the next morning, the sheets tangled around his waist from tossing and turning. He had decided he was going to talk to Erin and tell her that she was right; that their friendship was something he wouldn’t want to risk.
The band had a sound check that afternoon. Despite everything that had happened, they had decided to make Erin a guitarist for the rest of the tour, even though Robin was now on the road to recovery. Trent or someone else would usually do the rest of the guitar parts but now there were two guitarists, it would make life easier for everyone.
Pulling the sheets off himself and putting on a t-shirt and jeans, he walked over to the bathroom. Turning on the tap, he cupped his hands to catch the cold water before splashing it over his face. Looking at himself in the mirror for a moment, he stared into his own eyes.
You tell her she’s right, that it could never work between you two…
He sighed and looked away.
Doesn’t make it hurt any less…
Looking down at his watch, he realised that he was supposed to be meeting the rest of the group down in the hotel restaurant for breakfast. Putting his hair back in a messy ponytail, he dried his face and walked out of the bathroom.
* * *
Erin had been up for the past couple of hours; she hadn’t been able to sleep. Pacing up and down by the window, she paused to look out of it. It was the day that would either make or break her and Trent’s friendship. Worrying her lip, she looked over at the clock on the desk. She had about ten minutes before she was to meet the rest of the band for breakfast. Having already gotten changed, she decided to go down and wait for them.
There weren’t that many people around when she got there as she picked a round table in the corner. Opting for a black coffee, she sat and waited. Her head was telling her it was a bad decision to tell Trent that he was right. But her heart told her it was the right thing to do.
* * *
It’s the right thing to do; it’s the right thing to do…
Trent uttered the silent mantra in his head over and over as he and the others sat down and started ordering their food. The thought of telling Erin that, yes, the notion of being together was a big mistake, made his heart sink into his boots. Ten years it had taken them to get this far and now he was realising that it would go nowhere, which was probably one of the worst feelings he had ever felt.
He stared down at the toast that had been put in front of him, his appetite suddenly diminished. Reaching over towards the sugar, his fingers suddenly touched those of Erin, who had reached at the same time. Their eyes met for a moment before Erin lowered her eyes.
“You go first…”
“Thanks.”
She watched as he took the sugar and added some to his coffee, stirring the black liquid distractedly. Turning her attention back to her own food, she took a bite out of one of the pancakes on her plate. Her heart did a little flip at the thought of telling him that she was willing to make a go of them.
“Erin?”
“Hmm?” She looked up at him, along with the rest of the band, who were interested in the drama that was unfolding between the front man and their female guitarist.
“Could I have a word after breakfast?”
“Sure…”
The conversation died a sudden death after that and the band ate in silence. Neither Trent nor Erin could eat. Trent didn’t see the point of eating at that moment, he felt so depressed he didn’t see the point of anything at that moment. Erin was nervous; she was going to tell him she was willing to give it a shot. After 10 years of quietly lusting after her best friend, this whole scenario was a bit of a shock. She suppressed a shudder at the images her mind conjured up.
* * *
“You wanted to talk?” Erin said as Trent led her out of the restaurant to a secluded area down one of the many corridors.
“Yeah I do.”
Both spoke at once before laughing at their timing.
“You go first Trent…”
“Okay.” Digging his hands into the pockets of his jeans, he took a deep breath. “You were right…”
“About what?”
“About us, about the kiss, it was all a mistake and I should never have done it. We would never work…and I wouldn’t want to loose you as a friend.”
The cold hand of dread wrapped around Erin’s heart at his words. She felt like throttling him then herself.
“Oh…”
“What was it you wanted to say?”
“I was actually going to say that I had given it some thought and realised that life is too short for ‘what if’s’. We’ve been through so much together already, what could go wrong?”
Trent felt like gripping his hair and screaming.
“So basically we’ve both convinced ourselves of each others original view?”
“Yes.”
“I don’t know Er…I can safely say I love you, I’m not afraid to say that now. But what happens if something did manage to break us up? Then what? Our friendship just wouldn’t be the same.”
“But what if nothing did? You have to take some chances. You’ve done it with your career and every choice you’ve made has been for the better. Why not do that in your personal life as well?”
“I like to keep business and personal separate.”
“Does that include me?”
Rubbing his eyes with one hand, the other firmly in his pocket, Trent sighed. He didn’t know how much more he could take. His heart was telling him to say yes, be happy and be with his soul mate. His head on the other hand was telling him it was just going to end in tears and ruin something he had held so dear for years.
“I don’t know…listen, I think about it. You convinced me it was wrong and now you’re saying it’s right…”
“I know and I’ve convinced myself that it was right after what you said.” Erin said with a sigh. “Listen, I’ve got to go. But before I leave, I’m going to give you something to help you make up your mind…”
Before he realised what was going on, Erin’s slim fingers buried themselves in his hair and tugged him downwards into a blistering, soul searing kiss. Her body was pressed into his for a fleeting moment before pulling away, leaving Trent stunned.
“Just think about it, okay?”
He couldn’t even reply, the kiss had taken his breath away. Watching her walk away, he touched his lips with his hand before walking the opposite way.
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Ms Self Destruct