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Ship wrecked	By : KarinVAM Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > HIM Views: 3333 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know the members of HIM. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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“If you tell me first.”

“What?!”

“If you tell me how you feel about me.”

“Oh come on. That’s not fair... I asked you first.”

Even in the dark Bam could see Ville’s radiating blush. It was true he was just as embarrassed as Ville, and didn’t want to be the first to answer it. It was after all, a very sensitive subject for them both.

For Ville this was a downright nightmare. Admitting he had feelings for another guy, was so not what he wanted to do. That was like…..saying he was gay. Or Bi at the very least. He had had the wild party’s where he shared quick kisses with his friends, just to be Rock and Roll, but that was all it was. It meant nothing. Nothing like this.

Admitting it to a guy he had feelings for, was absolutely awful.

Admitting it to Bam, seemed like the end of the world on this godforsaken island.

Ville faced this, honestly, as a loose/loose situation. He could either tell Bam the truth and scare the shit out of the sweet innocent boy, or he could lie, ending up hurting Bam’s feelings again….and he really didn’t want to do that. He, or Bam would live through it.

So yeah, both ways he was screwed. And since they were together on a deserted island, making Bam either scared or upset was really not something he wanted to do.

Hell, it wasn’t something he wanted to do, period.

“Well…I like you.”

Ok, so he chose to stay in the middle. Letting Bam know the truth, in a mellow and safe way. Something he could interpret in various ways. It was the truth…just not the complete truth.

“Hmm…Ok.”

Bam sounded a little…disappointed, Ville noticed. And he was. Ville liked him, great. He knew that. But what did that really mean. Like him? As a friend? As a brother? As a freaking pet…? What the hell did that mean?

“You know you have to do better than that, don’t you?”

Ville was surprised Bam suddenly spoke with so much confidence in is voice. It was night again, and when it became dark, it always seemed like their masks came off. Ville’s did, and so did Bam’s. Only Bam didn’t become weaker when he did, he became stronger. Ville felt he only became less of himself.

“Bam please….”

“No, Ville I deserve the real truth. I’m confused, and hurt and scared. Tired, hungry, dizzy and on a deserted island. I don’t want to play games here anymore. My whole life in the States has been a charade and….I need some truth.”

Ville knew Bam was right, and shivered when Bam laid his hand softly on his shoulder. Not pressing, but simply letting him know he was serious. Ville couldn’t understand why Bam wanted to know so badly. Wasn’t he afraid of his answer?

“Alright… I….”

The long pause made Bam’s stomach start doing flip flops. The truth was that he was terrified of the answer. But he was even more afraid of not knowing, and assuming something that was a lie. His heart would break if he found out too late.

“If it’s that bad…”

“NO…yes...no, It depends.” Ville's sigh made Bam shuffle closer to him, feeling a bit guilty for doing this to him. He was obviously not really a talker when it came to his feelings.

“Just tell me.”

Bam lips brushed Ville’s ear gently as he whispered the words, and his mouth opened slightly from the heated storm going through his mind. He felt sweaty, and shaky and….weird. And even though he'd never felt anything like this before, it was clear what it was.

“I’m falling for you Bam. I wish I wasn’t, but I am.” Ville finally found the courage, eyes shining in the dark, filled with sincerity and looking straight at Bam. His voice was shaking, and his cheeks were red, but the message hit home, because Bam’s eyes widened and a small gasp escaped from the boy.

“You’re falling in love with me?” He asked, voice cracking and saying the word Ville had been too afraid to use.

“Yes.” It was a small hiss, but Bam heard it. It was a real yes, and Bam smiled, his stomach no longer doing flip flops, but now filling itself with butterflies.

“I’m falling in love with you….too.” He confessed, a nervous chuckle breaking off the sentence. Ville didn’t laugh, he didn’t cry. He didn’t know how to react. He had just
one question left.

“Are you as scared as I am?”

“Yes.” Bam answered without even taking a breath and Ville finally broke out into a smile, looking at his hand and giggling together with Bam.

“Oh thank god.”

Bam realized how hard this really was on Ville. Even harder than it was on him, and that said a lot. So he decided to go easy on him and not pressure him into answering anymore questions.
“Don’t worry. We’ll take it slow and well….We’ll just…see what happens.” Ville felt Bam’s hand stroking through his hair and he felt himself calming down. It was…alright. This, him feeling this, it wasn’t the end of the world after all, he noticed. For now, it wasn’t.

“Yeah…we’ll just see….”

Ville lifted his head to look into Bam’s burning blue eyes, that seemed to stand out so beautifully against the dark background. With his brown curls falling into his eyes, and a sweet smile on his boyish face, showing his white teeth. Ville felt his face burn, and wasn’t able to look away from the sight.

“Yeah…we’ll see...”

They just kept staring, Bam mesmerized by Ville’s beauty, that seemed almost magical in the moonlight shining on his ivory skin. Ville had leaned closer to Bam, not noticing he was doing it until their lips were suddenly almost touching.

He was taller, and hovered over Bam just a little as they were sitting close, seeing a shy Bam looking up at him from under long lashes that grazed his cheek lightly whenever he blinked.

“Yeah…” Ville silent whisper tickled Bam’s lips for a second before he finally found the courage to tilt his head a bit and press his lips to Ville’s parted ones.

Immediately the whole taking it slow part was out the window as Ville plundered Bam’s mouth hungrily and laid him down on his back as he climbed on top of him again, straddling his waist.

Their groans and moans sounded almost like the animals in the forest behind them. Their hands desperate to touch each other, roaming through each others hair and over their faces and chests. Like virgin teenagers, afraid but exited to explore each other for the first time.

Bam forgot his pain. Ville forgot his fear.

And they just kissed and touched, for what seemed like hours. Maybe it was hours. The sun was their only clock here, but there was no sun at night. Bam shyly let his hands wander over Ville’s back and shoulders. Some of his own brown, dried blood still sticking to the skin, was wiped away by his hands as he touched it.

Even with his pants still on, Ville had never felt so exposed in his life, and when Bam shifted a little, he took the opportunity to pull off Bam’s shirt, slowly and carefully for his arms. If he was showing his goods, Bam should at least do the same.

“Oh god Ville.” Bam moaned when Ville pinched his nipple gently, and a shiver ran down Ville’s spine. Hearing Bam moan his name like that was….well downright hot as hell.

“Bammie.” Ville gasped when Bam scratched his ribs with blunt fingernails, down to his bellybutton. A soft, warm mouth suddenly enveloped Bam’s ear, making him pant as Ville sucked on his earlobe gently, moving down to his neck.

Bam tried to put his arms around Ville as he started sucking on his collarbone, but winced when his heavy arms protested against the movement. The wounds were still not healed as much as he wanted, and they throbbed under the black cotton.

Ville pulled back, noticing Bam’s pain and smiled sadly. “Bammie, just lay down sweetheart. I’ll make you feel good. It’s the least I can do.”

His last words were muttered softly, pain clear in Ville’s voice, making Bam frown as he lifted Ville’s chin with his index finger, forcing him to look him in the eyes.

“Don’t feel that way. It’s my….my problem. Not yours.”

“No, it’s my problem too. Because I care about you. I want to make you happy.”

It was out before he knew it. And it felt so strange saying something that could have come straight out of some sappy movie he would never watch.Bam gasped soundlessly in surprise, but let his head touch the bottom of the boat as he laid on it, as Ville motioned him to do. He had no idea Ville’s feelings really were so similar to his own.

“I’ll take care of you.” Ville whispered with a smile, making Bam swallow hard.

“O-O-Ok….”

He felt foolish for being so willing to admit his weakness, but seeing Ville straddling him like this without a shirt, willing to well….please him. Something he was dying for, was just not an offer he could refuse. He had never done this. Ville had never touched another man like this.
But this whole situation wasn’t as frightening as the fact that he actually wanted it. He truly wanted to touch Bam and make him feel good.

Beginning with Bam's fingertips, he slowly kissed every one of them, taking it painfully slow, but oh so sweet.

He kissed the inside of his wrists, underneath the cuts, the inner side of his elbow above the cuts, and his shoulders. His eyelids, his forehead, the bridge of his nose and his cheekbones.

Never had it been so sweet and fragile. So beautiful with so little. Then he dipped down, kissing Bam’s lips again before moving down to his neck, sucking on the pulse point and making the skin red underneath. Bam arched his back at the feeling and moaned, encouraging Ville to be a little bolder, and kiss his chest gently before moving to his left nipple.

Bam hissed when he grazed it softly with his teeth. Carefully taking it in his mouth and sucking on it gently. Insecure and still so powerful. Bam couldn’t help but hear lyrics in his head of a song he had once heard. From a band he had listened to while he was going through his dark times. Negative…it seemed right then.

It was a song he would never hear again.

On and on I was looking for freedom
less and more I found it by you
this darkened sky of our heavenly kingdom
the thing in common is there's not so
much left to say

Ville moved to the other nipple, pinching the abandoned one while his tongue flicked the other, making pleasure shoot through Bam’s aching body. He wanted more, so badly he could cry. Oh hell, he probably would.

Are you ready or not?
ready for the truth?
sick and tired of this nonsense
I'm frustrated by you

One last kiss on his mouth, before Ville's head dipped lower again, hands roaming over Bam’s muscles, covered by tanned and toned soft skin. His fingertips pressing as he drew beautiful patterns on his stomach, teasing and caressing.

The signs of silence are
getting louder
breaking the bond we
protected so long

Ville’s tongue dipped into his bellybutton, kissing the soft skin and made his way down to the waistband of his jeans. Bam bucked his hips in despair, wanting so bad to feel more of Ville. This slow teasing, so sweet and tender. So full of love and care, was making his eyes water from the need. Little trails of water slid down the side of his face and dripped over his
ears as he moaned.

I don't see a reason
to ponder with this
any longer
there's no turning back
just one way to fall
fall apart

“Please Ville.” He begged, and Ville looked up, seeing the beautiful sight in front of him. Grabbing Bam’s clenched hand on the ground next to him, he placed a firm kiss on his knuckles, his gaze never leaving Bam’s eyes as he did, making his sweet little boy finally relax. Bam’s hands released the tight fists they had formed, and his forehead unwrinkled as Ville’s eyes kept staring at him.

Are you ready or not?
ready for the truth?
sick and tired of this nonsense
I'm frustrated by you

Their was no need to be frustrated, Ville was in love with him. He was going to make him feel good. No need to be worried. He wouldn’t run. He wouldn’t back out or hate him afterwards. Bam could see it in his promising eyes.

In a life that we live in
for the love we believed in
this might be the day we die
so we can be born again

His jeans slid down, together with his boxers he was wearing underneath. Bam was happy he had washed himself and his clothes just the other day. Else he would have been embarrassed. Ville looked at him, naked, and Bam felt himself turning red. Only to feel even more exposed when Ville dipped his head, kissing his thigh and whispering; “God you're beautiful.” against
his skin.

And life should be easy
when there's someone to hold on
that's what they told me
that's what I thought

He was already so ready. Pre-come leaking from his cock as it stood prouder than ever before. It had been so long since he had had any form of sexual release, and his body was protesting. Now with Ville’s touch and mouth on him, his body was working hard to make up for the lost time. Making his skin sensitive, and his erection throb even harder than his arms.

Are you ready or not
ready for the truth
sick and tired of this nonsense
I'm frustrated by you

Ville’s mouth hovered over him, as his hands massages his inner thighs, making Bam’s eyes roll back from the need. Finally Ville’s hand reached for his cock, grasping it gently and rubbing the slick pre-come over the top.

Both Bam and Ville gasped at the feeling of it, before Ville slowly started to run his fingers along the shaft, rubbing the head gently and pumping in a steady rhythm, making Bam moan louder than before. His hands reached for Ville’s shoulders for support, as Ville slowly lowered his mouth, closing his lips around the tip as he did, his hand still pumping Bam.
“Jesus, oh God. Oh please don’t stop”

In a life that we live in
for the love we believed in
this might be the day we die
so we can be born again

Ville didn’t stop. He closed his velvet mouth around Bam, and took in as much as he could, before sucking in his cheeks with force and pulling back again. The feeling of it was so amazing that Bam didn’t know how long he would last.

Ville moaned against Bam, making the boy shiver all over and gasp out loud as he now held on to Ville’s long hair. Ville just couldn’t help trembling from the taste of Bam. He was salt and sweet at the same time. He tasted like sex and…and just him. It was so typically Bam for
some reason. It turned him on so bad he was rubbing against Bam’s leg, he realized.

God, the things the boy did to him, he had no idea. He just needed to do something before he would come in his pants and ruin this whole thing. Unzipping his jeans with his free hand, he grabbed his own erection to get himself off while tasting Bam on his tongue. He was, just like Bam, also in desperate need for release as his body had done without for far too long.

God, maybe this was coming forth out of the blossoming love they had discovered for each other, but hell, this was now even more about lust. Bam looked down, immediately wishing he hadn’t as he bit his lower lip for control. Seeing Ville touching himself while sucking him off was just…too erotic. He was already so close.

“Ville, oh god…” He groaned, trying but failing at keeping his eyes from the sight. Ville was still sucking him, fiercely now as he stroked himself hard. Sucking even harder and whimpering his need against Bam as he arched his back, feeling his body tightening.

“Fuck Ville, I’m coming.”
Just as he said the words, he released himself hard, spurting into Ville’s gasping mouth and throwing back his head at the powerful feeling taking him over. He felt Ville swallowing around him and he screamed soundlessly as the powerful climax made his whole body spasm.

But only seconds after Bam was coming down from his high, he pulled Ville back up on him and crushed their lips together while batting away Ville’s hand from his erection. He tasted himself on Ville’s tongue, that danced fiercely with his, and let out a low moan.His hand curled around Ville’s cock, pumping him with force and making Ville gasp, while breaking away from the kiss to breath.

“Oh god Bammie, please. So fucking close.” He moaned, placing his head in the crook of Bam’s neck and panting heavily. Bam just smiled and stroked him harder, feeling his body tighten on top of him. It didn’t take long before Ville was coming, releasing on them both and
moaning Bam’s name while his eyelids fluttered like butterflies.

“So amazing.” was all he muttered before kissing Bam’s lips tenderly. Who nodded with a wide smile before nuzzling Ville’s neck. They looked at each other for a little while, smiling like they had just done something really…naughty. Ok, maybe they had.

Then sleep overtook them both again, as they laid in each others arms. Bam completely naked, apart from the fabric on his cuts, and Ville with his pants halfway off his legs. With the sun already colouring the horizon a beautiful deep purple.

On and on still looking for freedom
Planet Of The Sun

Okay guys, I wnet easy on the cliffhangers for you all! This time..*wink* Hope you like it and thank you all so much for the support, advice and reviews! A special thanks to my one and only soulmate punksbitch for being my amazing beta and my wonderful best friend!! May we go to Helsinki together love *raises glass* Cheers!
Much love!
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Ship wrecked