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The Wonders of Fate	By : mysticalcat Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > Panic! At The Disco Views: 1480 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know the members of Panic! At the Disco. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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A/N: TART TOASTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

“FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!” Ryan yelled out as he and Cat hid behind a bed sheet, hiding from the rest of the gang, who decided to chill right after the gala ended. “Didn't that Do Not Disturb sign say anything?” Brendon rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly, almost tempted to gouge his eyes out at the sight. “What sign?” Pete held up a sign. “You mean this one, right?”

“PETER!” Rebecca had gasped, staring at her brother as she realized that he had pulled off a not-so-innocent prank. “You could have spared us from the sight before you did that.” Ryan and Catrianna continued to glare daggers at the rest of the group, all who seemed as if they were about to either get sick, or burst out in laughter, ridiculing the couple until the end of time. Pete laughed, shaking his head at this suggestion. “If I told you guys, that would have defeated the whole purpose of the element of surprise.”

“I'll show you a bloody element of surprise,” Cat grumbled as she reached for the sheet the two weren't hiding behind, wrapping it around her. “Now, if you don't mind, I think I'm going to get dressed.” She stalked into the bathroom, clearly blushing like mad.

Becca walked up to Ryan, tugging at the blanket some, so to catch his attention. “Get some clothes on before I decide to yank off the sheet.” Her tone was authoritative right now, as she had fully intended on wrapping this little chat up so that she could then gather the girls together for Operation Tart Toaster. Primarily, she would be needing the DL on this Lilly so that this mission would be perfectly planned for the next evening.

Ryan scowled at Becca as he wrapped the sheet around his waist. “Don't look unless you want some peep show,” he muttered, causing the rest of the group to look away. “Thank You,” he muttered, finding his boxers over a lampshade. Just as he had slipped those on, Cat had emerged, clad in undergarments, shorts, and an over-sized tee. “Right, so Becca, you looked like you were needing something?” Becca rolled her eyes as she grabbed Cat by the arm, leading her towards the door. “We have some business to attend to.” The girl raised her eyebrow as she jerked her arm away. “Tart Toaster,” Becca had whispered in explanation. “Oh yeah, that.” She meekly kissed Ryan on the cheek before Becca finally dragged her out of the room. “As adorable as that might seem, we ought to get this planning done with.” Cat sighed, though she nodded in agreement, tiny knots forming at the notion of having to spend one evening remotely close to that tart.

That fateful evening soon came, and now, Catrianna sat across from Ryan while staring covertly at the table with Becca, Patrick, Andy, and the whore. Ryan raised an eyebrow as he saw her repeatedly stabbing the cherry tomato. “Cat, are you alright? You never did explain to me why you and Becca want to trail this girl. Cat sighed, putting her fork down. “Remember how I said that a friend's betrayal is what led me to the roof the night I fell? That tart with her eyes on Andy, that's the so-called friend. Bloody whore is what she is.” Ryan gave Cat a meek grin as he reached for her hand. “Don't worry. You know we're all here if any trouble starts.” Cat gave Ryan a wan smile. “Have I told you lately that I love you?” Ryan stuck out his lower lip in a playful pout. “Not today.” Cat leaned in, lightly kissing him on the tip of the nose. “Well I do.”

Their moment was ruined as a waiter brought forth a specific dish, setting it before Cat. Cat cast a look at the table where the others were at, and took notice to Becca spitting something out. She gave Ryan a questioning look. He, in turn, looked up at the waiter. “Excuse me, but what's in that?” The waiter smiled. “Monsieur, eets a very special dish requested to be brought here by zat girl over zere. “Crab paste with celery.” Cat had been holding the cracker with this paste right before her lips when she let the cracker clatter onto the dish. Ryan's eyes widened as he reached across from the plate to get it away from her. In turn, he handed it to the waiter. “Unfortunately, she's very much so allergic. Though thank that girl for us,” he said smoothly, beckoning that the water be off before turning to Cat who had been trembling from head to toe.

It was at this moment that Becca whispered in Cat's ear. “Tart toaster.” Cat sighed, smiling sweetly at Ryan. “I'll be only but a moment Love.” As she walked in, she stopped dead in her tracks as she saw Becca nose-to-nose with Lilly. She pursed her lips as she simply brushed by the redhead, not even wasting her breath on the wretched girl. It was here where the cow decided she would like to leave. Before she did, she turned around. “Oh, Cat dear, the violet is hideous and the boy you’re with looks like a rather ugly cross-dressing dyke. Ta, darlings!” she had simpered.

Cat had just about lost it right here. Rebecca didn’t know who appeared to be more furious, Cat or her. But at the moment, she would bet it was Cat. Especially given the slight against Ryan. Rebecca reached out and grabbed Cat before she lunged after Lilly, clearly intending to settle the score once and for all. As soon as the restroom door closed behind her, the irritating giggle out of earshot, Rebecca let loose of Cat’s arm, watching as she proceeded to start to pace angrily. “Who does she think she is to come waltzing in here like she owns the world? Bloody tart, she never was worth anything more than the two-pence knickers that she showed every bloody wanker who walked past.”

Rebecca managed to keep from giggling as Cat slipped deeper into her native slang, her accent growing with every syllable. She had only seen her friend this mad twice before, and each time she had ended up scared of her. She didn’t doubt that this would be another one of those times. “Cat, calm down. If you get much angrier I won’t be able to understand a word out of your mouth. And you know that I can understand pretty much anyone. Now, I know that Andy is absolutely petrified of this girl, so we don’t have to worry about there being a repeat of this situation, we just have to make sure that we all survive this night, and we’re home free. So come on, I’m sure that Ry is beside himself wondering where you rushed off to. ........ Tart Toaster.”

Rebecca giggled along with Cat at the small joke as they walked out of the restroom and headed back towards their separate tables, although when Rebecca approached her own table, she wanted to turn and run back the other way. Had she just seen Lilly grab her brother’s private areas?

Apparently Ryan had seen this too, as had Cat. Ryan looked as if was about to vomit right here. “Just had to see if they were real.” This had done it. Ryan had abruptly gotten up, walking briskly towards the restroom. He had already been on edge with all that had happened this night already. This was the tier that brought it all together. He groaned as he finished emptying the contents of his stomach into the toilet before flushing it. “I really don't remember eating that,” he muttered as he made sure all was clean before he went to rinse his mouth. Fortunately, this restaurant had mouthwash in the restrooms, so he was able to rinse out with that. With a tired sigh, he ventured out of the bathroom.

Meanwhile...

Cat had choked on the grape she had popped into her mouth as she had seen Lilly reach for them. She bit her lip as Ryan bolted out, and had immediately rushed by Pete to make sure he didn't do anything too rash. Though, it seemed as if Ivy looked like she'd do something instead. Rather, Pete's girlfriend had spoken. “What? I was just going to tell Lilly here, that yes, they are quite real. And if she would kindly keep her hands off of my boyfriend’s private areas. Else I would hate to reverse all the plastic surgery that she has no doubt had.”

Ryan had come out to join Cat as he, too, had watched Ivy on the verge of dismembering the girl. He breathed out in relief as it so seemed that Becca had done crowd control. “Kitten, are you alright?” Cat sighed as the two headed back to their table. “I'll be better if I can throw a grenade her direction.” She smiled wanly as she turned to her food, which she first sniffed to make sure it hadn't been laced with anything. Good. In silence, the couple ate their food, not quite sure what to expect to happen next.

When they got back to Jon's, they found Spencer to be in some sort of strange mood. Ryan looked at Cat with a tired look and then nodded towards the room. “Feel free to go online or something. I sort of have to deal with Spence,” he said in an undertone, walking into the suite's next room where actually the four boys had been.

“Look guys, I just need some time alone, is that so much to ask?”

“Spence, when you've emptied the mini-bar, yes it is.”

“Brendon, you're exaggerating.”

“Bullshit.”

“I have to agree with Bren there man. I couldn't get a lousy bottle of vodka.”

“What Jon, teaming up with Brendon now? So when's this wedding of yours.”

“In your ass.”

“Guys, stop, this is getting really old. Spence, I'm not letting you go anywhere.”

“What the fuck Ry, give me the keys.”

“Like Hell I will.”

“Fine, is that the way you want things to be, I'm gone.” With this, Spencer walked out of the room, slamming the door behind him. Cat jumped at this, and then stared at the other guys, who seemed to look rather sullen. “Shall I pop in a movie?” she asked, in hopes that the boys could at least like that. “Whatever.” Cat raised an eyebrow at her boyfriend as the other two just flopped on the couch, Jon resting his head back on the headrest, and Brendon sitting with hands on his temples.

Hours later, the phone in Jon's home rang. Ryan was the first one to answer the phone. “Spencer, where the hell are you?!” Becca's voice sounded on the other end.
“Hello to you too, Ry.” Ryan cringed as he fixed his gaze on Cat who had been watching her boyfriend pace around for hours, eventually falling asleep on the couch where Ryan had been standing next to. “Oh, sorry Becca. I’m just worried about Spence. He went out and hasn’t come back yet. He was in one of the moods, so I’ve been up pacing.”

They continued to talk, and Cat started to stir a little as she heard the next phrase.
“Oh my god Becca, are you fucking serious?! Is everything alright? Where are you?” Cat rolled over, not sure what that was about. She groaned slightly at the fact that she had been woken up. “Yeah, they’re all in bed. Cat tried to wait up, but she fell asleep about an hour ago. Becca, I know you probably don’t want to hear this, but I thought I should tell you. When I said Spence was in one of his moods, I meant the ones that started up recently. He’s not over you, you know?”

“I'm up,” Cat muttered, sitting up as she rubbed her eyes groggily. Spencer getting over Becca? This was new news. When were they ever together? “Becca, are you still there?” Cat tilted her head in her sleepy daze, though her look plainly asked Ryan what the hell was going on. He waved her off as he continued to speak to Becca.
“Yeah, I know. But listen, just call again when you’re about to leave the hospital to make sure someone’s awake, and I’ll try to get Jon up to help get Spence in the flat, okay?” Cat drummed her fingers impatiently, still listening. “No promises on that one. But be careful, Becca. We wouldn’t want to lose you....Bye.”

As Ryan hung up, Cat raised an eyebrow. “Spence got his ass drunk in some shaded place. Looks like he has to have his stomach pumped... That figures.” Cat shook her head, thinking of how angry Spencer had seemed. Had this been over Becca. “I didn't know Becca and Spence were a couple once.” Ryan sighed wearily. “It's a long story. Just, try to get back to sleep, everything is fine now.” Cat nodded, though she still felt that she should stay near Ry. Soon, she drifted off to sleep again.

Hours passed and eventually, Ryan had helped Becca with bringing Spence back into the place. Though, since he had been puking the entire night, this was definitely an all-nighter. Early morning turned into afternoon, and Ryan had been drinking coffee, forcing himself to stay awake when he heard a knock on the door. He answered to see Becca on the doorstep. “Morning sunshine.”

“Right, Becca. Besides, it’s not morning any more.”

“Yeah, don’t remind me. I still have a video shoot to get to. I just wanted to come and see how the oaf was doing right quick before rushing over to the lot.”

“The last time I checked he was still passed out, but go on up.”

“Thanks, Ry.”

Ryan let her in before going to sit with Cat, who seemed to have just woken up herself. “Think there's time for some quick nap?” Cat smiled slightly. “Only if you're joining me.” Ryan nodded. “Sure, sounds like a plan.” Within moments, the two had fallen asleep on the couch, curled up to one another, drifting into peaceful slumber. Though, realizing that sleep was just a lost cause, Ryan had decided to take a shower, and Cat ventured into the kitchen where she had sipped coffee, a new habit of hers these days.

“Hi, Cat.” Cat turned her head towards Becca, stifling a yawn as she saw her reach for a glass to put some ice cubes in. “Ello Becca. Taking care of our invalid?” Becca nodded. “For just a little bit. I have the video shoot to run off to soon. But I thought I would come and see how the oaf is doing.” Cat stifled a yawn as she sipped more from the espresso. “How sweet. I’m glad you reminded me of the shoot, or I would have completely forgotten, and Ryan too. He’s been pacing around all morning, even after not sleeping a wink.” Cat smiled as she traced a finger along the rims of her coffee mug before looking back at Becca.

“Poor guy. Well, I’m going to go tend our sickie. See ya later then.” Cat nodded as she sipped from the coffee again. “Ciao.” This being said, Cat sighed, seeing Ryan come back down. He greeted Cat with a kiss. “Coffee for me?” Cat shook her head, getting up as she fixed a new mug which she handed him. “Here's yours. I need mine.” Ryan rolled his eyes as he took a sip of his own coffee. “What a night huh?” Cat nodded in agreement. “Mmm most definitely.” Ryan stared at his coffee before he stared at Cat again. “I have some free time on my hands. Think you're up to exploring?” Cat nodded, getting up to rinse her mug in the sink. “Sounds like a plan. I ought to get showered and such then.” With this in mind, she headed back to the rooms, gathering her things before she slipped in the restroom to shower.

A/N: Annnd I am officially caught up with Row :) -*-Feels accomplished-*-
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The Wonders of Fate