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The Rose and Thorn	By : FlameWolf666 Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > Marilyn Manson Views: 3180 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I still don't know Marilyn Manson, Johnny Depp or any of the other famous people in this fic in real life. Needless to say, this is a work of fiction. I make no profit from this and this is just for fun.

Chapter List
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Author’s Note: ‘Servo [as Megalon]: Nyah nyah, nyah nyah nyah! Your father was a lizard! Your mother was an A-bomb! ...Your uncle was a robot!’ - MST3K

Chapter Twelve: I’m Going Home
    The next few days were a whirlwind of concerts, Amanda eventually relaxing just a bit around Manson. She didn’t necessarily like him but she certainly tolerated him a lot more than she used to. It all had to do with how drastically the rock star’s attitude had changed in regard to Raven. It was as if he was determined to prove he was willing to become better for her roomie and the curly haired female slowly grew to believe him. The singer hadn’t let Raven out of his sight since she had agreed to stay on his tour bus and was beginning to show his affection for her around others much more frequently.
    Johnny had left after a full night’s sleep, asking Raven to call him that evening before he went. The actor had seemed reluctant to leave but had to get ready for a roll in a movie soon. His only solace had been that Twiggy was staying. The dreadlocked male had an oddly maternal streak and would make sure things didn’t get too out of hand. Still, when the freelance artist had called him, he had felt a flood of relief. He could see Brian was doing his best but there was still a lot of darkness within him, darkness that had yet to surface. The star was frightened what would happen when Raven dug too deeply under the surface.
    Said female was honestly never happier. Manson had been treating her so lovingly that it made her heart swell with affection every time she saw him. So far, he had kept contact between them entirely platonic but it was obviously beginning to wear on the rock star. Every time they locked eyes, she could tell he wanted nothing more than to press himself up against her and inhale her scent. To be honest, this was the part that confused her the most. She had never known him to hold back in the short time she knew him, in fact he seemed more inclined to make what he wanted blatantly clear. Now he almost seemed gentlemanly and aloof despite the half starved look in his mismatched eyes.
    To be honest, Raven was just the slightest bit glad that Johnny had left as soon as he had. With him gone and Twiggy around, Manson had seemed to relax significantly. He had even started to joke around a bit; behavior she hadn’t seen before and, from the reaction of his band, the others hadn’t seen either. Shaking her head at how much things had changed in the past few days, the pale female leaned against the outside of the tour bus as she watched her boyfriend and Jonathan playfully wrestle eachother. Yet, even as she watched this, she felt just a hint of unease. After all, none of the issues that had caused the initial break-up had even been talked about. Sooner or later, they would have to be addressed and she found herself dreading breaking this peace.
    Watching the usually temperamental male laughing and honestly enjoying himself, the dark haired female felt no urge to drag things back into the dark. She had no idea what bringing up what was going on with him would do. She seriously doubted he would react well and she began to nibble her lower lip nervously, a gesture that was not lost on Twiggy. The former guitarist had been standing right next to her and noticed right away that something was deeply bothering her. “Better spit it out before he notices,” the effeminate male whispered in her ear, tugging her into a one armed hug.
    Looking up at him with a shocked expression at first, Raven tilted her head so her gaze focused on the ground. All of a sudden she felt shy and apprehensive. How much of what happened would Manson be comfortable with her sharing with Jeordie? How much did he know due to being around during that time? “Are you worried about what caused him to act the way he did after that concert he took you to?” Twiggy asked quietly, getting right to the heart of the matter. The stunned female next to him could only nod slowly, keeping her gaze focused on the dirt beneath her platforms.
    “We don’t have much time but I can tell ya it has a lot to do with Dita and the effect she had on his head while they were together,” the bronze skinned male murmured quietly, confirming her suspicions.
    After having Dita’s side, Raven was a lot less likely to place all the blame on her. Sure she had done some fucked up things while with him but her heart was in the right place. The model had used Manson’s affection for her to try to control him but it was because she was worried for his health. From only a short time around him, even Raven had to agree he had a worrying drinking problem and tended to make bad decisions. Yet, despite agreeing with that side of it, the artist had been wholly opposed to the pin-up’s methods. In the end, Dita had come to realize just how damaging what she was doing had been and expressed very real regret.
    Still, hearing just how much she was still affecting him bothered the ebony clad female. Would there ever be a way she could shove the dark shadow of Dita from his mind? She honestly didn’t know but she was determined to try. Just like her, Manson was haunted by the ghosts of his past and needed help to pull free. This revelation made her feel even more connected to the currently relaxed and laughing superstar. Maybe they could help eachother if they just gave in and trusted one another. Maybe, together, they could both overcome the demons in their heads. Just the thought made her heart fill with hope and she felt a bright smile curl her lips.
    It was at that moment that Manson turned to look at her, seeming to freeze in place when he saw her expression. The look on his own face faded from one of open happiness to one of simple and pure love. Then he was walking towards her, her heart racing as a blush filled her porcelain cheeks. She had never seen such a look in his eyes before and she found herself feeling more and more flustered the closer he got. Soon he was a bare inch from touching her body with his own. To both their surprise, she was the one to initiate the kiss; her tongue licking against his lipstick coated lips as her arms wrapped around his neck.
    In an instant his long arms wrapped around her and held her tightly to him, opening his mouth as he allowed her to direct the kiss. A bit shocked at this, Raven began to cautiously stroke his tongue with hers; growing bolder when she heard his breathless groan. That was when she began to kiss him in earnest, her tongue making sure not not miss a single part of his mouth. All too soon she had to break for air and she did so reluctantly, giving his lower lip a nibble as she let out a soft keen. Panting to catch her breath, the embarrassed female tried to ignore the shame and shyness swirling within her. She had nothing to be ashamed of dammit!
    Manson was just as out of breath as she was, his breathing ragged and coming out as a shuddery growl every exhale. Then he was tugging her into the looming vehicle, closing the door behind them before practically devouring her mouth once more. “Oh God Raven, you have no idea how long I’ve waited for this moment,” the performer rasped between kisses as his hands twitched on the small of her back. Just hearing those gruff words were enough to make her flusterment rise to all new levels but she quickly squashed that in favor of listening to the lust singing through her veins. Right now she couldn’t give a fig for all her hang-ups, all she wanted was to enjoy this moment.
    All of a sudden she found herself in the back room with the tall male with the backs of her thighs hitting the foot of the bed. It was then the reality of the situation crashed into her and all the horrible things her parents and exs had said to her came back with a vengeance. Looking up at Manson with fear and nervousness clear in her hazel eyes, she saw the rock star giving her a pained, resigned expression. Then he was giving her a patient smile as he removed his hands from her arms and backed up a few steps. “No!” she found herself exclaiming, frustrated tears rolling down her cheeks as she found herself angry with, well, herself.
    The lithe male tilted his head to the side, a confused, concerned look on his painted face. “Raven, it’s okay. I can leave if you need me to,” he offered in a quiet, soft voice as he began to back towards the closed door.
    “No, please! It’s not...,” she began before stomping a foot out of simple rage and frustration and sitting on the bed to cup her face in her hands. Then she was releasing a watery sigh as she ran her hand up her face, up her forehead and over her ebony hair; sweeping the shoulder length locks out of her pale face. Tears streaked down her paper white cheeks as she took several deep breaths to calm herself.
    “I... I really, really want to, especially after how well you’ve been treating me lately but... Every time we even get close everything I’ve been told comes back into my head and I just...,” she whispered, gritting her teeth as her heart clenched in her chest. Right now, she couldn’t be anymore furious at herself. Hadn’t he proven to her over and over this past few days that he thought she was attractive? Shouldn’t that be enough for her?
    Only when she felt him taking her face in his hands did she notice Manson kneeling in front of her with an all too understanding look on his make-up covered face. “There’s really no rush. Just having you around is more than enough for me right now,” he replied in a gruff voice, wincing slightly for a brief moment. It was then that Raven came to the realization that a man that had practically been a nympho had basically deprived himself of sex of any sort for her sake.
    “I’m sick of this, I’m sick of being the only thing holding us back from having a sexual relationship. I’m sick of all the drama! We just started getting on track here, I don’t want to be the one to put that in jeopardy,” the frustrated woman sighed, hating how she sounded like she was whining. In all honesty, the man on the floor in front of her had it more rough than she had and here she was acting like a child that didn’t get a lollipop.
    “You aren’t the only one with shit holding you back,” he replied in a quiet voice as he crawled onto the bed to sit beside her. Then he was placing a tattooed arm across her thin shoulders and tugged her close to his side. The fact that he was dressed in his normal stage costume only served to make her a bit more flustered but at least she was able to relax into him.
    “You’re already doing much better than our first attempt at a relationship. You’re trusting me with a lot more a lot faster, something I’m grateful for. I may not know all of your past but I do know enough to know that this level of trust with me is not to be taken for granted. Now, I find myself in a position where I have to return that amount of trust and I honestly don’t know if I have it within me,” Manson continued, his whitish blue and brown eyes fixed on her as an apprehensive look crossed his decorated features.
    Raven only gave him a small smile, wrapping her own arm tentatively around his thin waist and leaning her head against his bony side. “My father... he... I guess it all started when I was just a young child. He treated me like his buddy, took me with him everywhere until I turned thirteen. My brother had already been born by then and he had already become a bit aloof but it really changed at that age. He started treating me more and more like an object, something to do things for him and my brothers. Soon it got worse from there. He began to mentally abuse me, telling me I was never good enough. That I was fat, which I was overweight at that time so those comments really did a number on me. My mom was no better,” she whispered, feeling a bit like she was letting pus out of an infected wound as each word left her mouth.
    When she had finished, tears were rolling down her cheeks unconsciously and she swiped them away before she nestled more into the taller male’s side. “It wasn’t long before he began to beat me as well, his rage towards me only seeming to grow the older I got. I began to spiral into a deep depression and came very close to killing myself a few times. What eventually ended up saving me from that pit of abuse was Tony. When I first met him, he had been completely different. He was kind, treated me well and gave me a place to get away from my parents to. I eventually moved in and that’s when things started to go downhill. He... he began to... act a lot like my father, eventually getting to the point where he hit me when he was drunk. He very nearly killed me one night. It was only Amanda coming over that save my life. She told me she just knew something was wrong and ended up calling 9-11 when she found me. She forced me to move out and in with her soon after. We eventually had to move to a different state because Tony kept stalking me,” Raven continued, beginning to shake from the fear of her memories.
    They may have happened years ago but just talking about them made her feel as if these things had happened yesterday. More tears left her as her breathing began to hitch from the sheer amount of distress she felt. The only thing that kept her anchored was the feeling of Manson gently rubbing her half bare arm and murmuring comforting things in her ear. “It wasn’t long after that that I met Miah. It was almost the same thing over again. He started out very sweet and was even outraged when he had heard how Tony had treated me. Once again, when I moved in with him everything changed. He became very verbally abusive, often punishing me for imagined slights by taking away ‘privileges’. Soon he and Tony joined forces, the bastard coming out to live with us. They had me trapped for years until I escaped one night and pretty much hitchhiked my way home,” Raven finished up, her voice clogged with tears as a ball of pain rose into her throat.
    Silence followed, only broken by soft sniffling and gentle shushing. Then Manson was tilting her chin up to place a loving kiss on her lips. “I had no idea it had been that... Fuck Raven,” he whispered, petting her dark haired head gently. The distraught female only clung to the celebrity like a lifeline, sobs ripping from her throat and sounding like she had held onto them for far too long.
    “I haven’t e-even t-told you everything they did to me,” she whispered, shaking as the tears continued to leave her like a flood. It was almost as if a dam had been broken deep inside of her and all of her past agonies were finally leaving her. To her shock, instead of feeling worse the more she cried, she began to actually feel cleansed.
    “I don’t want to know sweetie. I don’t think I could withstand it without flying into a rage and scaring you. If you still feel a need to later, you can but just not now,” the superstar murmured, his voice gruff with thinly hidden anger that wasn’t directed at her. In fact, his hold on her was gentle and very protective.
    Then he was slowly releasing her and getting to his feet, moving to two familiar bottles on his messy dresser. Before she could even begin to miss his presence, the six foot six rocker was walking back to her with them both in his hands. He settled back in beside her and handed her the bottle that was full of green fluid and labeled Absinthe. “Take a tiny sip of that. Just a tiny one,” he advised, his heterochromic eyes watching her closely. Raven looked from him to the bottle before taking a closer look at the bottle.
    “148 proof?! Holy shit, how does this not taste like rubbing alcohol to you?” she asked, all her earlier angst fleeing for sheer shock as she cautiously twisted off the top and took a sniff. To her surprise, the jade colored liquid didn’t smell as alcohol-y as she thought it would. It more smelled like black licorice and something bitter and earthy. In all honesty, it didn’t smell too bad but she saw why he had cautioned her to only take a tiny sip. She had only had Pucker before, nothing this strong.
    “That’s why I said only a tiny sip. It’ll help calm you down a bit,” Manson replied, taking a sip out of the Vodka bottle in his hand.
    Making a face, Raven gave the bottle a wary look; as if she was afraid it was going to attack her. She had never really like the taste of any form of alcohol, not even wine coolers. She only drank if someone asked her to and that wasn’t often. Giving the man next to her a nervous look, she took the tiniest sip she could; shuddering at the bite of the Absinthe. It didn’t taste bad so much as it burned from how strong it was. It burned all the way down, warming her and making her shudder slightly. “Phooo that is fucking strong,” she hissed, her eyes watering as she handed the bottle back to the singer next to her.
    “Yep,” the thin male replied from next to her before taking a pull from the bottle she had just handed him. Then there was an urgent knock from the door, drawing an irritated sigh from the performer.
    “Can’t have a moment’s peace,” he grumbled, giving her a frustrated smile before he went to the door and opened it. On the other side stood the entire, concerned group. Their eyes immediately went to an amused Raven and varying expressions of shame came over the assorted faces.
    “As you can see, we are fine. Since I already performed tonight, I have no more obligations and bid you all a good night,” Manson declared in a completely neutral but firm voice before he closed the door and locked it.
    “They mean no harm, they’re just worried,” Raven soothed, getting to her feet and walking over to him to place a hand on his upper back.
    “They act as if I’m going to attack you. Nothing could be further from the truth!” the irritated singer sighed, turning to pull her into a hug and kissing the crown of her head affectionately.
    Instead of digging up that sore spot in their past, the pale female lead him back to the bed and sat beside him; leaning against him once more. “Raven, I don’t often feel guilt for the sake of my girlfriends. I usually find it hard to put someone else’s wants ahead of my own. I guess a lot of that has to do with my own childhood. I don’t know how much you know but my boyhood was not a happy one. There were good moments but there were also a lot of bad ones. My parents did their best with me but they had their own shit they were dealing with and I often got the worst end of it. I guess the moment that changed my life was with my neighbor. I’d known him since I was little, I never dreamed he would... I wasn’t the same since then. I found myself unable to let people in or treat my partners right. I think I was afraid to let anyone get close to me again, at least until Melinda. Then there was Dita, which only made things worse. You... you’re the closest I’ve felt to actually being in love with someone for a very long time,” Manson told her in an eerily calm manner, only the pulsing of his fingers letting her know just how hard this was for him.
    “Manson...,” she whispered, looking up at him before reaching up, cupping a cheek and forcing him to turn to face her. Then she was kissing him with all the love and gratitude she felt for him in that moment, not caring when he began to bend her towards the mattress as he deepened the kiss.
    Then he was breaking it with a pained whimper, his eyes fixed on her as he panted raggedly. “I love you Raven. I love you and trust you,” he murmured, hovering above her as his mismatched eyes fixed on hers. It looked like it was taking every drop of his control not to pounce her to continue to kiss the life out of her and she felt heat flush through her body to pool in her core. The flustered, shy female only nibbled her lip before gently pushing the much taller male back just slightly. The look of disappointment on his face almost made her feel guilty but she knew what she was about to do would wipe that look off his face.
    Taking a deep breath and gathering what determination she had within her, the shaking, nervous female lifted her shirt up and over her head. She had lost a lot of weight since he had last seen her and she found herself looking at the stretch marks that littered her fishbelly body due to her fluctuating weight. Her boobs were large but slightly saggy due to her constantly changing body mass and she felt shame as well as panic begin to clog her throat. How could she be so foolish to believe the stunning male before her would find any of this beautiful.
    That was when she was very nearly tackled backwards as Manson’s lips crashed into hers fiercely. His tongue pried her mouth open and dove in while his arms wrapped around her tightly. Raven went stiff at first but soon relaxed into the kiss with an unsure whimper, more tears rolling down her marble skin. Was it possible that he didn’t care about her tiny flaws, that he didn’t see her as ugly like almost everyone else that had been important to her seemed to. It was in that moment that she felt truly accepted and loved, leaving her feeling like a bit of a fool for not doing this sooner. “Beautiful Raven, you’re absolutely gorgeous,” the performer husked when he broke the kiss to pull back and allow his eyes to rove over her half clothed form.
    Even that small amount of scrutiny was almost enough to make her want to cover herself but she forced herself to leave her body open to his gaze, to trust what his expression and actions were telling her. Taking another deep, steadying breath; she got to her feet, removed her platforms and slid her pants down. Already, her heart was racing once more but she forced herself to continue; keeping her eyes on the ground as she removed her crimson panties. She also had stretch marks on her thighs and lower stomach, another source of shame for her. Her entire body shook as she waited for Manson to say or do anything as she kept her hazel gaze fixed on the carpet.
    Just as her stressed sobs were beginning to bubble past her trembling lips, Raven felt a firm hand lifting her chin. Looking up, she saw Manson looking down at her with a mixture of reverence and downright lust. “Lay on the bed hun,” he rumbled in a gentle voice, his lips briefly brushing against hers. Her heart racing in her chest, the nervous artist nodded before laying on her back on the bed; sitting up just enough to watch the rock star across the room from her. The longer she was naked around him that he wasn’t acting revolted, the more it was helping her relax and her body slowly began to stop shaking as the singer started to untie the corset around his torso.
    As the piece of leather hit the floor, she was struck by the surrealness of just what was happening. It wasn’t too long ago that she would have fantasized about this very thing happening and now, here she was. A bit of her shyness coming back, she licked her dry lips as she watched his hands go to the g-string that covered him. Granted, she had seen him naked before and had even had his member in her mouth and between her legs. Yet this situation was very different and she felt flusterment as well as mortification whirling around within her. It certainly didn’t help that Manson was now smirking at her as he pulled them down slowly, as if he was teasing her. Then he was naked and she felt a hot blush color her cheek as her gaze went right for his erection.
    It seemed even larger than before, pointing at her from a nest of dark pubes as a drop of white fluid gathered on the slit. Swallowing slowly, Raven forced her eyes back on Manson’s; forcing her breathing to slow as he slowly came toward her. “I’m not going to hurt you Raven. Lay back and try to relax,” he soothed in a throaty voice before his lipstick covered lips closed around a pert nipple. Just that small action caused a bolt of electricity to shoot right through her core, drawing a soft moan from her lips as her back arched. Chuckling, the ‘Antichrist Superstar’ swirled the sensitive nub with his tongue; seeming to revel in her gasps and keens.
    While his mouth was busy, a hand slipped between her legs; causing her to tense at the unfamiliar touch to her most private of areas. “Shhh, it’s just me,” he murmured against her breast, giving the small button a long pull. A roll of pleasurable sparks rushed through her, coiling and pulsing deep within her as her thighs relaxed.
    “Good girl,” the ‘God of Fuck’ rasped, reaching between her legs to give her sex an ever so gentle brush. Then he was switching to her other breast and her world dissolved into pleasure while his skilled fingers began to play with her pearl.
    “M-marilyn, oh fuck,” she gasped out, her back arching as arc after arc of thick pleasure rippled through her body and pulsed right into her core.
    “You’re so fucking wet Raven. So fucking ready for me,” he husked, his index and middle fingers lightly pinching her clit between them as they rubbed up and down.
    “M-mare, haaa, f-feels so... gnnnh,” the writhing female grunted, beginning to see stars as a coil within her wriggled and tightened.
    “Let go, cum for me. I need to fucking be inside you but I’m not going to take you until you cum,” the panting male rasped in an urgent voice, his teeth biting her neck passionately as she keened his name like a mindless mantra. Then she was stiffening and pressing her slit into his hands as her world exploded, her juices pouring out beneath his digits.
    “That’s it. That’s good Raven,” came a relieved rumble before his warmth left her side.
    She didn’t have long enough to feel bereft before he was back, a distinctive crinkling noise filling the room. Nerves once again washed through her as he crawled over her and cradled himself between her open thighs. His mismatched eyes met her hazel ones as he rested his plastic coated manhood against her moist womanhood. Concern and need warred for dominance as he seemed to hold himself back from simply taking her. “Are you okay?” he asked in a raspy voice, his arms shuddering from the effort of not giving in to his urges.
    Taking a deep breath and relaxing as much as she could, Raven gave a small nod before pulling Manson down for a tender kiss. Using this as a distraction, the rock star hilted himself within her and stilled instantly; breaking the embrace with a small hiss. Then he was murmuring softly, kissing her face lovingly as she tried to relax beneath him. Thankfully it wasn’t long before the pain began to fade and she was urging him to move, which he did with enthusiasm.
    Breathless keens left her lips as she rested her sweaty forehead against his pulsing shoulder. Each movement within her set off sparks of pleasure that burst within her like explosions. Her nails raked down his back over and over as she called his name like a prayer. Manson’s own snarls of her name joined hers as his hips began to jerk and snap against hers, each thrust hitting something that both hurt and felt extraordinarily good at the same time. Then she was imploding as a cry of his name left her lips blacking out just as Manson found his own release within her.
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The Rose and Thorn