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Surreal Moments	By : HobNobsAndTea Category: Individual Celebrities > Tom Hiddleston Views: 2315 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: None of the writers recieve any money for these stories. They are written for the enjoyment of the readers. No copyrite infringement intended.

Chapter List
- 13
- 14
- 15
Your first week back, you don't have time to think, let alone miss him. But you do. And it gets you when you least expect it. Sitting in the car, waiting for Jameson to get done with soccer practice, shelving books in the room he sat in for months. Between his filming a documentary, your class and work schedule, Marie's dance class, Jameson's soccer, you barely have time to call him. Text is your main communication and it varies from happy and fun to full on emotional torture. It's the first Saturday in September and nearly 3 weeks since you left London that the four of you get to Skype.

Marie jumps up and down on your lap as Tom's face fills the laptop screen. "Daddy!!"

"Hi Tom!"

"Hey, baby."

You watch his eyes fill with tears and your own spring up. God, you miss him. And seeing him like this, you feel it even more. "Hello, my darlings! Please tell me everything I've missed. I'm all yours."

Marie regals him with tales of preschool and dance class. She shows him a new move she learned and he claps. You stare at the monitor and just watch the way his face reacts. His eyes shine with love and pride for your little girl. His handsome face is so animated as he talks to her.

When it's finally Jameson's turn, he goes full on. Telling Tom about the goals he's scored, one in each practice. You see the pride in his eyes double when Jameson tells him that he's started practicing tennis in the backyard. "My pool is full of tennis balls." The two of you share a laugh. Tom glances at you and your heart skips a beat. Jameson finishes telling him about school and the new teacher and the new kid that likes to play with him.

You swallow when it's finally your turn. "Hang on, baby. I've gotta put the kids to bed."

"Of course." Marie and Jameson say their good night's and Marie kisses the screen. You quickly tuck them into bed then run back downstairs. Your stomach is a ball of excitement. Almost like the first time Tom drove you home.

"You're all mine now."

"I am." You hear rustling. "What's that?"

"Touching your face. I've missed you."

"I've missed you too. How's filming?"

"Boring. Narrating is fun. I love the voice work but the shots are draining."

"I'm sorry, baby." And like that, you fall into easy conversation. Tom goes into more detail about filming and you tell him about the back to school week at the library and all the course work you have ahead of you. Words fall away and the two of you stare at each other. "I love you."

"I love you. The house feels so quiet and empty. I miss you in my arms."

You look down at your lap, swallowing the lump. "I miss your arms around me. Is your bed as cold as mine?"

"Definitely, darling."

You take a deep breath and sigh. "Is it always going to be this hard?"

"I hope so. I can't imagine being alright with being away from you." You look at the clock and it's nearly 2 a.m.

"Oh god, Thomas, I've kept you up all night."

"It's worth it."

"I can't believe we've been on this thing for 6 hours."

"I've barely gotten to talk to you since we've been apart. One night of lost sleep is a willing sacrifice. But I really must turn in."

"Alright, baby. Get some sleep. I love you." You touch the screen.

"I love you. Goodnight, my darling." You and he blow kisses. His face winks out and your chest clenches.

Drawing your knees up, you cry softly in the chair, resting your face against your knees. Your phone vibrates. The picture displayed is you and Tom at the Tower of London. You sniff then answer. "Hey baby."

"Don't cry, my love. Please."

"I'm not."

"Liar."

You wipe your tears with the back of your hand. "So I'm crying."

"Countdown the days until I'm there."

"October 25th. That's like 50 days, baby."

"And I'll be in your arms." You hear sheets rustle. "I want you to do something for me."

"What's that?"

"I want you to take two pictures a day. One of you doing something that makes you smile."

"Ok. And the other?"

He clears his throat. "The other is of your face or your body when you're pleasuring yourself thinking of me." Your breath escapes you in a sigh. His tone makes things clench. "Will you do that for me?"

"Yes"

"Good girl. Now, go take your first picture. Good night, my beautiful yank. I love you."

"I love you, limey. Good night."
You stand in the kitchen boiling water for tea. It's a comfort you could afford yourself with him gone. Tom had left a whole box of his tea in your cabinet when he left, on purpose you think. He knows you loved it too and just the scent of the Earl Grey comforts you considerably. It's really too late to be doing anything but going to bed, especially after the morning you had. But your bed is so empty without him. You've never noticed how big it was before, but now that you're aware of it, you can't escape it. A few nights in the last two weeks, you've even let Jameson and Marie sleep with you in an attempt to help ease the ache left. Having your babies so close always makes you feel better.

You pull the kettle off before it whistles and risks waking them and pour the steaming water into the cup. It immediately begins to darken to a rich brown as the leaves began to infuse. As you wait for it to steep, you pull down the little cookies he loves so much and place one on the saucer. You open the fridge door and reach for the milk, splashing a little into your cup. As you turn around to put it away, you hear a small voice at the top of your stairs.

"Mummy? Are you awake?"

You sigh. It's well past time for Marie to be asleep, and all you want is a moment alone to think about Tom and how much you missed him. You walk to the bottom of the stairs and see Marie in her pink little nightgown. "Sweetie, what are you doing awake? You should be in bed right now."

"I can't sweep. I fink dere's a mons’er in my room."

You close your eyes for a moment and breathe out. "Come down here." You wave your hand. Marie climbs down the steps carefully and you pick her up, seating her at your waist. You walk back into the kitchen and pick up the saucer with the cookie on it, handing it to Marie, and carry your tea cup into the den. Sitting down, you place the cup and the saucer on the side table.

Marie curls up around you on your chest. "Mummy, I miss Daddy." Your heart clenches. Tears burn the edges of your eyes. "I wanna see him." Marie hops off the couch and reaches for your iPad. She hands it to you, meaning she wants you to Skype him. It would be almost 3:00 in the morning in London now.

"Sweetie, I think he's asleep right now. We shouldn't wake him up." It tears your heart apart to watch her face contort like it does. She doesn't understand.

"But mummy, dis how I seen him last time. Why not again?" Marie shrugs.

You fold. "Come here, sweetheart, let's try." Your heart aches. And this is actually the only thing you want in the world, so you figure screw it. If nothing else, you can leave him a video message. Marie settles into your lap as you pulls the app up and check if Tom is online. No surprise, he isn't, so you hit record and start to leave him a message. "Hi baby, it's me-"

"and me!" Marie waves.

You laugh before continuing. "Yes and Marie. We just wanted to say hello and how much we miss you, and we hope you're having fun working on your new documentary. Isn't that right, princess?" “Yes! Mummy says its got aminimals in it!"

You laugh lightly again and prompt her. "Say, 'I miss you'?"

"I miss you!”

"Say 'I love you'?"

"I yove you! And mummy do too!" Marie turns around and places her small hands on each of your cheeks.

"Okay, sweetheart, calm down, it's bedtime. Can you give a kiss?"

Marie leans over and places a gentle kiss on the screen. It makes you smile. "Night night, Daddy!" She waves at the screen as you blow a kiss.

"Good night, baby. I love you. I'll see you soon."

You don't feel quite so heavy as you hit "send" and toss the iPad to the other end of the couch and carry Marie up the stairs back to bed.

“Good night, my princess. I love you.” You tuck her back in.

“I yove you, Mummy. I see you in da morning.”

You walk back downstairs and settle onto the couch, tea cup in hand. You know you shouldn't drink it and not just because it's so late. You listened carefully to what the doctor told you that morning. This is not just the stomach flu. That sick feeling that had been following you for the last few weeks is far more than that. The doctor confirmed it, twice. And when the “p” word fell from her mouth, the breath left your lungs. You're pregnant.

You couldn’t believe it at first. There was no way. You took your birth control like clockwork, every day. You couldn’t afford to lose your focus when you were this close to the end of school. Not that a baby would ever be looked at as a burden. You’ve only known about it for twelve hours, and you're already in love with it. But what about Tom? What will he say? Surely, he will love it, right? He loves Jameson and Marie like they're his own. His actual own will only be even greater, won’t it? God, you hope so.

You hold the cup close to your nose and close your eyes. If you smell the tea enough, it's like he's right there with you. You have to tell him. Tomorrow. Before this got away from you. You nod and say it out loud in the empty room. “Tomorrow. I’m gonna tell him I’m pregnant tomorrow.”

You sniff the tea until it grows cold then pours it down the sink. You climb the stairs to your room but kneel down and pick up Tom’s shirt you’d hidden under your bed months ago. You shed your own t-shirt and slip his on. You climb into bed, resting your hand on your stomach. Tomorrow is coming fast.
The kids are at school so there is no chance of them over hearing. You log into Skype to find Tom waiting for you like he said he would be.

"There's my beautiful darling. So what's this news?" Your stomach flips. You take a deep breath and sigh. "Love? You're worrying me. What's wrong?" His face draws long.

"Oh god. Nothing. Nothing's wrong. I'm just- nervous and scared." You drag your hand over your hair.

Tom laughs. "Scared of what, darling?"

You take in his joyous grin. How could you ever doubt that he'd be upset about you being pregnant with his child.

"Tom, I'm-" You take a deep breath and blow it out. "Tom, I'm pregnant."

His face falls slightly and you flinch inwardly. Oh god. He's going to dump you. "You're-" He clears his throat. "You're pregnant."

You bite your bottom lip and look down at the sonogram picture. It wasn't much. Just a tiny spec. But the next one would look like a little bear or alien. You hold the picture up to the camera and point. "This little spec is our baby." Tom's shock is clearly evident.

"I thought you were on birth control."

"I was. Dr. Mizrahi said it was that 1% failure rate." You carefully set the pixelated picture down. "I'm sorry, Tom."

"What?"

"I know this isn't what you wanted right now with your career in full swing."

"Shut that nonsense up." You look up at him. "I'm shocked, yes. But you know I want a family. One with you. Timing is just off. I want to be there with you."

"So you're not upset?"

"Upset? Heavens, no. Shocked. Not upset. I just need to process. I wish I could sweep you up in my arms and kiss your belly and tell the baby how happy I am."

"So you're happy?"

"Of course." His tone makes it seem like there could be no other reaction. "Of course, I'm happy. I love you. I'm just dejected that we're so far away right now." His stunning smile breaks over his handsome face. "The woman I love just told me I'm going to be father." He leans back in the chair and sweeps back his hair. "I'm gonna be a father." You smile. "I'm gonna be a father!" He becomes more animated each time he says it. You can't help but laugh. He kisses the camera. "Oh my darling. I love you. I love you too, baby." He blows a kiss at a downward angle.

"I love you, Tom."

"If you need anything, you call. No matter the time."

"Baby, you're half a world away."

"I don't care. I'll make calls."

You look at the clock. "Shit. I've gotta go."

"Alright, love. I love you."

"I love you, too."
You stand in your bedroom, finger to your mouth. Taking stock of what could go and what could get moved to fit a small bassinet in the corner, along with everything else you’d need. You so wish Tom could be here to help, but it will only be a few weeks anyway. It certainly helps that he calls even more often than before. He doesn’t want to miss a thing. As you contemplate, you hear a chime from downstairs. It's your Skype alert.

You rush down the stairs and catch it just in time, clicking the video button and opening the window. There sits Tom, already beaming at you.

“Hi, baby,” you breathe.

“There’s my love. I was so afraid I would miss you this afternoon.”

“I caught it just in time, I think.”

“Stand up, let me see.”

You laugh and half roll your eyes. “Tom, you’re not going to be able to see anything yet. The baby is smaller than a grape still.”

“Please, darling? I just want to see for myself.” His pleading eyes make you cave and you stand up. You lift your shirt enough to show your stomach and watch as Tom smiles bigger. “No, I’m convinced, my love. I can tell a difference. I can see him!”

“Him? You think it’s a boy already?”

He nods. “I can tell. I have a good fatherly sense about it now.”

You sit back down and raise your eyebrows at him. “Oh, do you now? Of the two of us, I would hope I had a better sense, sweetheart.”

Tom doesn’t stop his laugh. “Well darling, I don’t know what to tell you about these things. A father just knows!”

Shaking your head with a smile, you can’t help it. He's unbearably sweet and unbelievably supportive of all this, despite happening so quickly.

“You’re gonna be an amazing father. You *are* an amazing father.”

“And you’re an amazing mother. You can’t imagine how that feels.” A quiet moment passes, the two of you just looking at each other. Finally, Tom breaks the silence. “Love, I’m so sorry, but I have to go. They need me soon at the studio.”

“Okay. Go, go work.”

“I love you. Both of you.”

“We love you too.” Tom blows two kisses before you close the chat window, your heart feeling light as a feather.
The toilet lid clatters against the tank. Once again, you find yourself on your knees praying to porcelain. Afterwards, you sit and rest your head against the wall. You can't remember being this sick with either Jameson or Marie. You can't keep a single thing down. Save for oyster crackers. And Gatorade. They stay the longest. You wait to see if you're going to vomit again before you flush the toilet. You rinse your mouth out and fix your hair before returning to work.
Nina watches you humming to yourself as you move around the kitchen. She squints at you and listens carefully. You hum 'Once Upon a Dream' from Sleeping Beauty. She slides off the barstool and corners you.

"Nina, what are you doing?"

Your best friend sniffs your breath. Mint with an underlying acid smell. "Oh my god! When were you planning on telling me?!"

"Shhh. Keep your voice down for fucks sake."

Nina grits her teeth and stays right beside you. "How far along are you? About six or seven?"

"Seven. And Tom and I were going to tell everyone at Marie's birthday party. We're hoping to have sonogram pictures. It'll be too early to know sex but at least, he'll have something to take home to London with him."

"If he goes back home."

You sigh and look out into the yard. Wade and the kids are in the pool. The four children gang up on him. "He has to go home to London before November 12th. He has to settle things before he goes to L.A. to film the last 2 Avengers movies."

"Is he going to be around for any of the pregnancy?"

"Nina, please. It's not like he doesn't want to be here. He almost backed out of Chicago."

Your best friend throws up her hands. "And where is this going to be?"

"Broadway."

"So what? London for the first trimester. L.A. for the second and New York for the third? Is he even going to BE HERE for the birth?"

"You know what. Just stop. Tom loves me. He loves my kids. He loves our baby. You should see him, Nina. He is NOTHING like Jimmy was. He's already talking about nursery themes and finding the right pediatrician. He's already a better father than Jimmy EVER was. So don't you even begin to compare them."

"I wasn't-"

"Yes, you were. I could see it on your face." You toss the bowl of salad into the sink and shove her out of the way. "I need to lay down. Let me know when Wade is ready to start the grill." You don't look back as you leave her by the sink and climb the stairs.
(Next Chapter -->)
- 13
- 14
- 15
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Surreal Moments