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Feeling that Way	By : KayleighSiobhan Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > Journey Views: 5125 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not know any of the members of Journey. This story is completely a work of fiction. There is no truth to it. I make NO money from this story.

Chapter List
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Greg and Neal were good to their word. They had devotedly watched over Steve while allowing him just to rest. The rest of the previous evening and the night had been uneventful. As the doctor had hoped Steve had slept deeply. He was somewhat feverish and sedated. Greg sat by his bed and sometimes dozed himself. But mainly he stayed awake watching for any time his lover stirred. The nurse on duty provided him with cold compresses to sponge Steve off to help keep him comfortable and lower his body temperature. The IV fluids infused along with the antibiotics keeping Steve hydrated and warding off any infections. When Steve did occasionally open his eyes the nurse would come in and help him use the urinal and drink some small amounts of fluid. The singer’s throat was still sore, his voice was rough and speaking was difficult. This concerned his two bandmates but Liz had assured them that it was strain from Steve screaming and crying, and it would heal with some rest.
Neal had also spent the night sitting in the room on the opposite side of the bed from Greg. He actually dozed less then keyboardist. He couldn’t rest for even a few minutes it seemed. He had his hand resting on the bed rail and even if he started to drift off, any time Steve shifted position it startled him awake. Neal had a strong bond with Steve, it always came through in their song writing. Now it seemed like Neal could actually feel both the singer’s pain and his emotional distress.
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Sherriff Rossi had came to the hospital earlier that morning. Steve had just finished trying to swallow some breakfast, but the only thing he could manage was some scrambled eggs and some water. Swallowing hurt worse then speaking. Plus the IV fluids were keeping Steve’s bladder constantly full and using the urinal was both physically painful and humiliating. Steve didn’t even want to think about passing any solid food out of his body. The pain medicine took the edge off but didn’t bring him total relief. It didn’t really matter though as far as eating was concerned, his appetite was shot. Steve was grateful when Greg introduced the officer to him. It gave him an excuse to push the food away and focus on something else. Greg quickly explained to Steve the part Rossi had played into the investigation into his kidnapping. He shook the hand the officer extended to him and thanked him for his efforts. Then the Sherriff asked him the question he had been dreading for he knew it would eventually come. He wanted Steve to discuss the kidnapping and rape. He wanted to make sure the man who had committed this vile act was caught and punished. Steve was grateful when the Sherrif asked if he wanted Neal and Greg to stay or wait outside the room. Steve chose the later not being anywhere near ready to tell the details of the attack to the other two men. He wasn’t even sure that they were ready to hear what had been done to Steve, what he had endured and submitted to. Sheriff Rossi was patient while Steve slowly again related the details of what had happened to him. Between struggling to relieve the events in his mind Steve tried to answer the questions posed to him.

"No, he did not recognize the house he was taken to."

"He thought the attacker’s voice had been familiar but he could not place it."

"The rapist did not reveal if he had actually met Steve before or was just admiring him from afar."

"No, no one outside of the band, Herbie, Aaron and Steve’s family knew he was going to the beach house."

"He did not notice anyone following the two lovers that day"

Finally the sheriff had finished and Steve looked at him sadly, telling him “ I wish you had been investigating the stalker in the first place .” When the sheriff asked him why Steve said “ Because maybe they would have caught him before he raped me. Now it is too late. “ “No “ the sheriff told him. “ You survived and now we can make sure this man is punished.
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A couple hours after the Sherrif’s visit Steve was released from the hospital. While driving Herbie back to beach house the night before, Aaron had offered the use of his vacation home for Steve and Greg to stay for an indefinite period of time. It would be easier for Steve then traveling back down the coast to the city. Herbie had hired a private security firm that would have 2 guards posted outside at night and one during daylight hours. Even though any notion of a romantic vacation had been dashed Greg was hoping that quiet location would bring Steve some peace. If they went home even moving around the neighborhood would be stressful. With Herbie canceling concert it would be like the band members had targets on them, there was too much chance of them being confronted by overzealous fans. Steve’s mother was going to stay a few days also. Neal and his girlfriend had taken her home long enough to pack a few things and visit with Steve’s stepfather, then they would drive Mary back tonight. Since Steve and his mother had been so close al their life he was hoping her prescence would aid in his recovery.
Steve had not spoke on the drive home. When they pulled off the main road onto the short service road that lead to the beach house, Steve choked back a sob. Greg immediately looked over and said “ What is wrong baby, are you in pain. I know these back roads are a bit rough. “ No I was thinking that when that man was taking me away in the van, I know when we left the highway, I figured he was going to to take me away somewhere to rape and kill me, so that way my body would be easy to get rid of. Greg pulled the car over, putting it in park and turning off the engine. “It’s alright Steve it is over.” Greg squeezed his hand tight as Steve’s tears spilled over. Steve told him "I just wish I could go back in time two days. I would have fought him instead of giving in in his bedroom. I would rather just be dead. “ No", Greg said don’t think that way. “Steve we are going to get throught this." He reached out to hug Steve and the younger man pulled away. “ Please just take me home Greg. I want to wash up and go to sleep. I want to wash his touch off me.” Greg was hurt by Steve’s response to his trying to comfort him but he said started the car again and proceeded to drive toward the beach house.
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When they pulled up to the front of the house Greg went around to the side of the car and this time Steve accepted the offer of Greg’s hand to support him. He moved stiffly the doctor was right about him being sore. Actually sore was not the word for it. Front and back Steve felt like hot pokers were being jammed into him. He let Greg lead him to the house, barely noticing the private security call in the drive way. When they got inside Greg asked “Are you hungry ? “ I will fix you some lunch” Steve shook his head and reapeated “ I just want to clean up and get into bed” Greg looked so lost Steve told him “ Maybe you could just stay with me for a while, I doubt you got any sleep last night. Sure I would love to be just near you while you sleep. At that moment they were interrupted by a bundle of grey fur meowing frantically and almost knocking Steve over. Misty mewed desperately and Greg picked her up and put her in Steve’s arms. He cuddled her and said “ I missed you so much”. After stroking the kitty for a few minutes he said “ Hopefully she is ready for a nap too. Steve suddenly felt to tired to stand up. “Help me upstairs,”
Greg helped Steve undress and get into the shower. It was the first time he had seen his lover's body without clothes since the rape The bruises on Steve’s neck and belly had darkened. On Steve’s thighs was a combination of chaffed skin and bruises where he had struggled to keep his legs closed. Plus he was reddened and raw where the rapist had continually fondled and stroked him trying to get him arroused and hard. Steven looked at Greg and then looked away. “ I am ugly now aren’t I. “No” , Greg told him, you are beautiful. Steve begin crying hard and this time he let Greg hold him close. He started shivering and Greg said “ Let me get you dried off. I don’t want you to catch a cold on top of everything else. He finished up Steve’s shower and and wrapped him in a blanket while he washed and dried his hair. He helped Steve into dry clothes and into the queen bed. He then asked "You sure you are not hungry." Steve sighed the antibiotics that they had given him in the hospital were doing a number on his stomach but Greg was trying so hard. He did have to smile though the rapist was wrong Greg still loved him." "I will try to eat something light, he told Greg. Steve closed his eyes and leaned back against the pillows. Misty came padding softly into the bedroom. She immediately curled into a ball as close to to Steve as she could get. It didn’t take Greg long to return, he even had a a few pieces of fruit that was left from the pieces O’Reily had brought earlier that week. Steven finished the light meal and took a Valium that the doctor had prescribed for sleep. In the meantime Greg took his own shower. He quickly scribbled a note for Neal to see when he brought Mary back. He had volunteered to stay also he did not seem to want to be away from Steve either. By time Greg checked both door and pulled down the curtains in the bedroom, it was getting late in the day.Greg climbed into bed and moved close to Steve. The singer snuggled against him. He whispered “ I love you Greg, I love you so much. He was quiet for a minute then he said “ I was afraid that you wouldn’t want me anymore because ... because he had me you would consider me damaged goods. Greg was horrified “ Never, nothing he did could change you, or my love for you. “ But Steve knew he was changed, forever, and his life was never going to be the same.
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Feeling that Way