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The Moon and the Sun	By : soleil Category: J-Rock/J-Pop & K-Pop > Malice Mizer Views: 3125 -:- Recommendations : 1 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know the members of Malice Mizer. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 18
- 19
Epilogue

‘Why is living in loneliness much easier than allowing someone to love you?’ I wonder as I sit in my favorite corner of my window-sill and watch the dawn taking place. The soft music that is playing since hours now in the background is his. He told me that he has written, composed and sung every single one of those songs just for me. He said that if I listen carefully to them I will be able to understand. Truth is that I still don’t. Or maybe I just can’t let myself believe that he is truly addressing me when he sings how much he misses that person and how much he loves him or her. A part of me thinks that it can see some scenes of our past while listening to his songs, another part rationalizes that everything he says in them is too vague to be sure..

My head hurts from too much thinking and arguing with myself and I will my old and my new self to finally shut up and let me rest for the time being. I turn away from the window and stand up but my feet refuse to walk the rest of the way to my bed as my eyes run along the contours of the blond man that is sleeping there peacefully.

It seems almost unbelievable that he is sleeping there with my consent when I think about how many years I have hated him uncontrollably. Ignoring the awakening butterflies in my stomach as I watch him I step nearer and contemplate about waking him up and sending him to his own home but when he shifts waking slowly from his sleep and opens his eyes to fix me with this impossible tender gaze I can’t help but forget immediately about that thought.

“Come to bed love, it’s cold..” he whispers.

He stretches himself like a cat and reaches out for me with his arms. It really is a silly picture but I find myself smiling lightly and moving towards him without consciously doing so. When he has wrapped me in his arms and pulled the covers over our bodies I feel that I will be finally able to sleep.

He yawns and pulls me closer to him. “Sleep now, you can think tomorrow of a way to get rid of me” he says and I can feel his smiling lips on my forehead. The warmth in me grows making the fears that had plagued me most of the night disappear and I kiss his collar-bone before settling my face in the hollow of his shoulder.

“Hai, you’re right,” I say. “Oyasumi nasai.”

“Oyasumi enjeru.”

Owari.

A.N's:
I am really sorry for taking so endlessly long to update this, but my life has been a small disaster those last few months.
Anyway, despite that we can't be really sure that Mana doesn't decide to strangle Gackt in his sleep to end his inner turmoil, 'The moon and the sun' has finally come to its end and that's again something I feel I have to ask your forgiveness for. I am by no means a writer and I guess that you would have expected a better ending to the story and it is not that I have lost interest in it but just that I don't think that I can make it any better. So I am very sorry if I have disappointed any of you, even more so because I really do love this story which has in a way accompanied me for the last year, and through which I had the opportunity to meet some very nice people (and gain a little sister!!!)
I didn't have a beta for those last couple of chapters because I didn't want to bother the people that have done the job so far assuming that they have probably lost their interest in the story by now. (Btw, Loz: once again thanks for all your work!). So if there is anyone out there who wants to do it, please e-mail me and I sent them to you.
Perhaps some people reading this story were expecting a lemon, but truth is that I am not able to write something explicit and very graphic about Mana, because -well, I respect him too much to do so and every attempt would turn out to be a parody or something like that- so I refrained from it.
Many thanks from the bottom of my heart to all the people reviewing, rating and reading this story *hugs people to death* you'll never know how much that meant to me! (Kyoki + Morgan : the lack of Mana X Gackt fics is something I never will be able to understand. I mean, the tension between them back in Mizer is so obvious that in my opinion there should be tons of fan fiction about them, but so far I have found only very few that I like -shrugs- maybe it has something to do with the fact that I absolutely hate Mana being portrayed as autistic.. but I shouldn't go there right now! Thnx for your kind words!)
(Thinking about pairings: I can't remember reading a multiple-chapter fic about Mana X Közi that I liked and I think this is also weird, as they are so unbelievably hot together [while tipping the word 'hot' I actually managed to burn myself with my cig..ouch]. If someone out there decides to do so please let me know. I'd really love to read something about them that doesn't involve rape, BDSM, etc.)
It really is my honor if I could keep you warm company on a boring hour with this fic of mine, so arigatou for reading!
I will come back some day soon to edit this properly when I have gained the distance I lack right now, till then:

Sayonara,
sun.

Postscript to someone out there: no, love does not conquer all, but you will never know for sure unless you try.
- 18
- 19
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