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Road Signs and Rock Songs	By : classic06 Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > Kelly Clarkson Views: 9486 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is purely a work of fiction. I do not know Kelly Clarkson,and I am not profiting from this story.

Chapter List
- 18
- 19
- 20
+++++++++
"You're not even home for one day, and there's already trouble in paradise?" Ashley raised an eyebrow as she walked out the back door to find Kelly sitting on the ground, absent-mindedly petting Baby who lay right beside her.
Kelly shook her head, laughing softly, "You know me...I never know when to shut up."
"Yea, you do have a problem with thinking out loud," Ashley agreed, sitting on the other side of her. "You realize you spoil those dogs, right?"
"I'm not home enough to spoil them."
"Jason said you were thinking of getting another one?"
"Yea, we haven't had a puppy in a couple years. I miss it."
Ashley laughed, "You sound like one of those crazy parents that keeps having kids because they love the sound of little feet running down the hall."
"I'll stick to the sound of little paws," Kelly scratched behind Baby's ears.
Ashley watched Kelly carefully.
"Is this going to be one of those corny best friend moments?"
"Maybe."
Kelly rolled her eyes, "Come on, lay it on me."
"I just find it funny."
"Find what funny?"
"You and the dogs. You do spoil them, and you love them so much, and you still want more because you still have more love to give."
"They're cute," Kelly shrugged.
"And?"
"And they don't judge."
"And?"
"And they love you no matter what."
Ashley nodded.
"What?"
"I think it's great. You know, the whole rescuing the dogs from the pound and stuff. You bring it from having no home to a place that must be like heaven for dogs--they get to run around on endless land, and eat all they want, and have any toy they could ever imagine. That's really great."
"But?"
"Like I said you have a lot of love in that little pint-sized body of yours. I just...I think it'd be nice if you would share that with an actual human for once."
Kelly laughed softly, "It's not like I haven't tried."
"Oh whatever," Ashley elbowed her playfully. "You call going to a gay club once every couple months, and going straight up to the VIP room where you have no actual interaction with anyone, trying?"
Kelly frowned, "It's not easy for me, you know?"
"I know," Ashley sighed, immediately regretting teasing her.
"You think I don't want to be able to go some place and just be myself and be with whoever I wanted?"
Ashley wrapped an arm around her at the sight of tears in her best friends eyes, "I know. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. I just...I just want you to be happy."
"I am happy."
"If you were happy, you wouldn't be out here being pensive Kelly. You'd be in there, cutting up with Jill and Kate, doing something dorkish."
Kelly shook her head, "I said too much."
"You always say too much," Ashley smiled softly. "That's why we all love you."
Kelly chewed on the corner of her bottom lip.
"She's worried about you."
"Who?"
"You know who. She sent me out here to make sure you were alright."
Kelly's brows furrowed in confusion as she looked down, her hand pausing as she scratched just behind Baby's leg--one of her weak spots.
"I know, right? If you said too much, she should totally be running scared right now, not looking after you. Funny how people surprise you like that."
Kelly sighed as Ashley stood, ruffling her hair playfully before walking back inside.
+++++++++
"Come in," Kelly replied, not looking up from her computer at the sound of someone knocking on the door to her office.
"You know, this place would be so great to play hide and seek in," Jill noted, walking inside.
"It is. We've done it before," Kelly nodded. "I wouldn't recommend doing it while drunk. You'll seriously get lost."
Jill laughed softly, walking around the office, looking over everything.
"I'm not hiding," Kelly commented, still looking at her lap top.
"No?" Jill smiled at a picture of Kelly and her mom that must've been from back when Kelly was in high school. "Y'all are close."
Kelly looked up, "Yea. She's great."
"Just because you told Kate you want to kiss her, doesn't mean you have to hide from her, you know?"
"I'm not hiding. I'm working."
Jill nodded.
"She, um...she told you I said that?" Kelly turned back to her lap top.
"Yea, she wasn't sure if she did something wrong...if she offended you or hurt you or anything."
Kelly shook her head, "How do you do it?"
"Do what?"
"You're gay."
"No...really?"
Kelly gave a soft laugh, "You know what I mean. You're gay, and you're her best friend."
Jill nodded, "Ah. You're wondering why I'm not trying to jump her bones every five seconds?"
Kelly blushed lightly.
Jill laughed, "Too much? Would you prefer the phrase make love to?"
Kelly buried her face in her hands, turning crimson.
"You really like her, don't you?"
"How do you do it?" Kelly ignored her question.
"Did Kate ever tell you about the time that I kissed her?"
Kelly shook her head, sitting up as Jill sat in the chair across from her.
"We were roommates back in college, right? By then, I had pretty much come to terms with things, but I hadn't told Kate, even after we got to be really close friends."
"Why not?"
"The same reason you were nervous to tell her. I was completely crushed out."
"I am not crushed out," Kelly rolled her eyes. "I just think she's a very sweet, very beautiful girl."
"Yea, sure, anyway," Jill continued. "I was so screwed, and unfortunately I don't mean that in a literal sense. Like, think of what it would be like to share a room with the girl with the way you feel right now. You see her change clothes. You see her walk to and from the bathroom in a towel. She's always around you. Not exactly easy."
"What did you do?"
"We went to a party one night, nothing special. We both got a little drunk, but not like hammered or anything, but apparently that was enough for me because when we got back to my room, we were talking on her bed, and the next thing I knew, I was kissing her."
"What did she do?"
"Froze...then pushed me away," Jill nodded.
"Ouch," Kelly winced.
Jill shrugged, "She was nice about it. She told me she was sorry if she had led me on in anyway, but she just didn't feel like that about me, and the next few days she went out of her way to make sure that I knew that things weren't going to be awkward between us because of it."
Kelly frowned slightly, "Why are you telling me a story about how I have no chance with the girl?"
"First, there's a big difference between you and me. Second, that's not why I told you the story. I told you the story to show you that you aren't going to scare her away. You think telling her that you want to kiss her is going to make her run? Heck, I actually tried to make out with the girl, and now she's my best friend."
Kelly smiled slightly.
"You aren't going to scare her away," Jill shook her head. "And please, don't stop being honest with her. You don't want to hide it, trust me. It just drains you. Plus, I think she really likes that about you...that you're so open."
"What about you?"
"What about me?"
"Do you still have feelings for her?"
"For Kate?" Jill laughed. "God no. She's like my annoying little sister that I just can't help but love to death."
Kelly nodded in understanding.
"So..." Jill stood from her chair. "Am I gonna have to send her in here, or are you going to quit hiding?"
"I'll quit hiding," she assured. "Just let me finish these emails real quick."
"Alright," Jill smiled before walking out of the office, closing the door behind her.
+++++++++++
"Am I allowed to come in?"
Kelly looked up, smiling at the blonde. She stood, pulling a chair from around the desk to next her, motioning to it.
Kate walked across the office, sitting in the chair, "Still working?"
"Yea, sorry. I'm totally being a bad host huh?" she rubbed her eyes, yawning.
"No, you're good. You have a lot of stuff going on with the album, and the tour, and stuff."
"I was gonna come find you," Kelly explained. "But more and more stuff kept coming in...did Jill send you in here?"
"No," she shook her head. "I just wanted to make sure you weren't working yourself to death on your vacation."
Kelly smiled, "You like to look after me, huh?"
"I like seeing you happy and having fun, yea," Kate nodded.
"I, uh...I'm sorry I was hiding from you earlier..."
"Can I ask why you were hiding?" she reached out, taking the stress ball off the desk, squeezing it curiously.
"I thought I may have freaked you out."
Kate laughed softly, "I believe you told me once that the only thing keeping you from having sex with me in the middle of the parking lot was the fact that I'm straight. I didn't have a problem with that, so I don't think I'm going to have a problem with you saying you wanted to kiss me."
"They said you were worried."
"About you doing this...pulling away. You allowed yourself to be completely vulnerable with me for the briefest moment, and you became scared. I was afraid that I'd never get you to be like that with me again."
"It's hard for me to be anything but honest with you," Kelly admitted. "I don't know why...but it is."
"That's good. I like when you're honest with me."
"Can I ask you a question?"
"Oh...role reversal. My first big question...let's have it," Kate's eyes lit up.
Kelly laughed softly, spinning her chair so that she was looking at her computer instead of at the blonde, "I was just, wondering...I talked to Jill. She, uh, told me about when she kissed you."
"Are you upset I didn't tell you?"
"No, of course not. That's between you and her, I just...I can't help but think...are you just being nice?"
"What do you mean?"
"To me...are you just being nice to me? Are you just humoring me?"
Kate looked at her, confused.
"Jill said you were so nice to her about it, and that now y'all are best friends. I was wondering if that's what this was...you just being nice."
Kate nodded, looking down at her lap thoughtfully.
"I know that's kinda a loaded questioned," Kelly admitted. "I'm not asking if you have feelings for me...I just wanna know if you're just going along with it because you're nice."
"I'm not," Kate replied. "I'm not just going along with this. I...you...I like being around you. I like moments like this when it's just the two of us, and I feel like I'm getting to see this side of you that no one else really gets to see. You...intrigue me. You're just really great to be around, and I'm so thankful that I get to be around you as much as I do."
Kelly smiled, her cheeks a light pink.
"Not everyday a beautiful girl calls you intriguing, huh?" Kate teased.
Kelly laughed, "Beautiful? Who told you that?"
"Um, I believe that would've been you."
"Oh yea...well, I have to say, I definitely have good taste," Kelly winked at her, standing. "Come on, I'm sure Jason's probably starving where he's at."
Kate smiled, taking the hand that she offered, and followed her out of the room, back down the stairs.
++++++++++++
"So, what's the plan?" Jill asked as she followed Kelly, Kate, and Ashley into the music store.
"To buy stuff," Kelly nodded, taking out a piece of paper. "Jimmy gave me a list of all the necessities, just to make sure, but I figure you pretty much know what we need, right?"
"Guitars?"
"Yea, and like the amps and stuff. I had Deaner send them an email, so they know what I want for drums, and I know the basics for keyboards and whatnot."
"Sure," Jill nodded.
"Ok, so..." Kelly looked around. "Where'd Kate go?"
Ashley laughed, pointing to one of the walls.
Kate was staring in awe at a hot pink electric guitar.
"Kate," Kelly giggled, holding out a hand.
"It's so pretty," Kate walked back to her, taking her hand.
"We'll come back to it," Kelly gave her hand a squeeze.
"Oh, no," she quickly protested. "I don't want you to...I was just joking..."
"You sure?"
"Yea," Kate nodded. "I wouldn't ask you to buy something like that for me."
Kelly shrugged, "Let me know if you change your mind."
"You're crazy," Kate shook her head.
"You're hot," Kelly replied.
"Focus," Ashley patted Kelly's shoulder. "We're on a mission, remember?"
Kelly caught Kate's eye, smiling at the blush that was growing on the taller girl's cheeks the longer she held her gaze.
Ashley sighed, taking Kelly's arm, "Come on, Cassanova. Jill's already lost in guitar land. You may want to reign her in before she buys the whole store."
Kelly held onto Kate's hand, allowing her best friend to guide her to the back of the store where her other backup singer was walking around.
+++++++++++
Kelly smiled as Ashley walked to her.
"Seriously?"
"What?" Kelly asked innocently.
"You called her hot," Ashley pointed out as they waited for the delivery truck with all the instruments to arrive. Jill and Kate were busy exploring the new house.
"Isn't she?"
"Do you always flirt that openly with her?"
"I'm not flirting. I'm just being honest and saying what's on my mind."
"It's flirting."
Kelly shrugged, "Then yea, I always flirt that openly with her."
"And she doesn't mind?"
"She's never told me to stop," she shook her head.
"I don't think I like this," Ashley admitted.
"Like what?"
"This little...arrangement, or whatever it is, y'all got going on."
"It's innocent, Ash."
"It's innocent when it's playful flirting," Ashley corrected. "Not when it's honest flirting."
Kelly sighed, "You know, you're the reason why I understand guys when they say girls are confusing."
"Yea?"
"Yea, you can't make up your mind. It's like sometimes you encourage me to flirt with her, yet you don't want me to. And you want me to have fun, but not all the time. You just...you're crazy."
Ashley laughed softly, "Yea, I have to admit I'm not sure at all how I feel about it."
"Tell me what's on your mind?" Kelly offered, sitting down on the swing on the front porch.
"You want to know?" Ashley sat beside her.
"It's nice to hear an outsider's perspective sometimes," she nodded.
"Alright, well...first off, I love Kate. I think she's great, and I think she and Jill are the perfect addition to the band. I also think she's a very genuine, very sweet person, and she's a lot of fun to be around. It's also obvious that she cares about you and your well-being."
"Yea?"
"Yea. Y'all have definitely connected on some odd level," Ashley nodded. "I don't think she would ever intentionally hurt you."
"So far so good."
"I also think that even though I give you a fair amount of shit about it...you're right. You are still kinda new to this. You haven't dated that many girls. This is the first time you've seriously been attracted to a straight girl, and I know that you aren't sure how to exactly deal with that. I notice you--when you're around her--you're constantly checking yourself. Like, you'll sit down on the sofa right next to her, but then you'll scoot like an inch or two away just to give her a little space. Constantly having that on your mind, can't be easy. Not to mention the fact that yes, you are her boss. If something were to happen between you, whether it be a relationship, or you trying to initiate something and her saying no...that can have serious consequences on the band, not too mention on you."
Kelly frowned, her hands folded in her lap.
"Like I said, I think Kate is really sweet, and I don't think she'd ever hurt you intentionally...but that doesn't mean she can't hurt you unintentionally. For all intents and purposes, she is straight, Kelly. And I'm not saying that she's not attracted to you, or there's not something there, because in all honestly, there very well may be something there, but do you think she'll be willing to go down that road? Do you remember how hard it was for you at first? You were beating yourself up about it, you were in constant denial. You dated Graham for months just because you refused to accept it. I don't want to see that," Ashley shook her head. "I don't want to see her hurting because she can't come to terms with it, and I don't want to see you hurting because she's pulled away."
Kelly nodded, scooting closer to her.
Ashley wrapped a protective arm around her, "In the end, all I want as your best friend is to see you happy. If this little thing y'all have going on is what makes you happy, then I'll stop holding you back, but if you don't want to go down that road, then I'm here to keep you in check if you need."
"Thanks Ash."
Ashley patted her arm, looking up at the sound of the delivery truck approaching, "Come on. We've got some decorating to do."
Kelly gave a small smile as Ashley stood up, pulling her off of the swing.
+++++++++
"Dang..." Kate's jaw dropped as she stood behind Kelly, watching the workers from the store leave.
Kelly turned to her with a raised eyebrow, "Were you looking over my shoulder?"
"You're two feet tall--it's not that hard."
Kelly laughed.
"Did you see how much you tipped those guys?"
"Well, they had to come all this way to help us set everything up, and I don't know how this works, but I'm sure house calls aren't really in their job description."
"You seriously just made like their month."
Kelly rolled her eyes, walking over to the drums, "Come on, hot shot, let's see what you got."
Kate walked to her before sitting down on the small stool in front of her.
Kelly reached over her shoulders, holding out two drumsticks.
"This is so cool," Kate took them in her hands.
"Like this," Kelly placed her hands over Kate's, correcting her grip.
"Can we bang on them?"
Kelly chuckled, "You know, all the times I've imagined you saying that, it always came out of your mouth more romantically."
Kate blushed, "You know what I meant."
"Unfortunately," Kelly teased, pulling back, allowing her fingers to graze over the back of Kate's hands and arms as she retracted her hands.
"Honestly?" Ashley asked as she walked into the large room after having gone close the gate behind the delivery truck. "You give the most spastic one out of all of us the drums?"
Kelly laughed, "Let her at least try."
"Now?" Kate turned her head, looking at her hopefully.
"Now," Kelly nodded, immediately wincing as Kate started to hit the drums loudly in no sort of rhythmic pattern once so ever.
Ashley gave her an 'I-told-you-so' look before walking out of the room, heading towards the kitchen.
Kelly placed a hand on Kate's back leaning down to talk in her ear so she could hear her over the 'music'. "I'm--"
Kate jumped, dropping one of the drumsticks.
"Sorry," Kelly laughed softly next to her ear. "Didn't mean to scare you."
"You didn't, I was just...yea..."
"I was just gonna say that I'm going get something to drink. Did you want anything?"
"Um, no thanks. I'm good. Thanks though," Kate turned with a smile, bringing them face to face.
Kelly immediately stood up straight again, taking a step back.
"Sorry," she quickly apologized.
"No, no, it's ok," Kelly assured. "I shouldn't have been...I was in your space. I'm gonna go get that drink."
Kate grabbed her hand when she turned to go, keeping her there.
Kelly looked at her nervously.
"I'm not mad."
"I didn't think you were."
"I scared you?" Kate studied her carefully.
"I just wasn't expecting you to turn," Kelly shook her head.
"You know, I don't mind you being that close to me."
Kelly smiled, "I didn't pull back out of respect for you...I wish I could say I was that chivalrous."
"Then why'd you pull back?"
"So I didn't kiss you, which again is for my own selfish reasons because right now me kissing you would hurt me a lot more than it'd hurt you," she admitted.
Kate laced their fingers together, "What can I do to make this easier for you?"
"You can quit the band and become a lesbian," she shrugged.
Kate laughed softly.
"No, actually, I don't want you to change anything," Kelly shook her head. "I like the way we are."
"But it's hard on you."
"Well, aren't you the cocky one," Kelly smirked.
"I didn't..." her cheeks were a light pink. "I mean...from what you said..."
"It is a little hard, but I can deal with it," Kelly smiled.
"You love teasing me, don't you?"
"You look cute when you're flustered...like now."
Kate turned back to the drums as her cheeks blushed a deeper red.
Kelly laughed, giving her hand a gentle squeeze, "You sure you don't want anything to drink?"
"Water?" she turned back to her, hopefully.
"You got it," Kelly winked, letting her hand go as she walked away. She tensed as Kate started to bang loudly on the drums once more. She made a note, mumbling to herself, "Earplugs."
"You had to give her the drums?" Ashley laughed when Kelly walked into the kitchen. They could hear Kate banging on the drums through the wall.
"She really liked them," Kelly shrugged, grabbing a couple waters from the refrigerator.
Ashley smiled, "So that's your answer, then?"
Kelly chewed on her bottom lip, looking at the door she had just walked through that led to the living room. "I can't not be open with her."
"You can't or you don't want to?"
"I can't," Kelly shook her head. "And you said you'd reign me in, but a lot of the times you aren't even there, and I don't want it to be like that anyway. I like how we are. It sucks sometimes, yea, but the majority of the time I love it. Maybe I'm a masochist?"
Ashley laughed, "You're not a masochist."
"I just really like spending time with her because it's calming and exciting at the same time, you know?"
Ashley shook her head.
"Like, with the album," Kelly pointed out. "All this mess going on is just exhausting, but I just have to talk to her, have her go into question mode that she likes so much, and it just...everything seems clear, you know? And it's just calming to be around her, but at the same time it's so much fun. She makes me laugh, and she gets my blood pumping. And she's so refreshing. I don't remember the last time I've met someone like her, especially someone that's in this industry. And that's so great, you know? What are you laughing at?" she asked, confused as Ashley covered her mouth, trying to stifle a giggle.
"You're rambling," Ashley pointed out. "Like majorly."
"Ugh..." Kelly rolled her eyes.
"So..."
"So..." Kelly looked up at her best friend.
"I'm not holding you back anymore," Ashley shook her head.
"No?"
"If this is what you want, then you should have it."
"Do you think I'm making the right decision?"
"I think you're making the right decision as to what makes you happy now, and I think you, more than anyone, deserves to be happy right now with all the shit going on. As for later on? We'll deal with that when we get there."
"Thanks Ash," Kelly hugged her.
"Yea, yea," Ashley laughed softly, pulling back. Both of their heads tilted slightly at the sound of an actual rhythm being played out on the drums.
"See? She's already gotten better," Kelly smiled.
Ashley raised an eyebrow, "Yea..."
Kelly followed her back into the living room where Jill sat at the drum set, playing while Kate stood beside her, playing a triangle that Jill must've given to her. "Jill..."
Jill stopped playing, turning back to her with an innocent smile, "What? I just figured it'd be safer for everyone's hearing if she played a somewhat quieter instrument."
Ashley laughed.
Kelly rolled her eyes, walking towards Kate, "Come on. You play guitar, right?"
"I'm not as good as Jill," Kate admitted as Kelly led her by the hand to an acoustic guitar.
"That's alright. Here, try this one," Kelly handed her the guitar.
Kate sat down on a speaker, resting the guitar on her leg as she played a couple chords.
"Maybe the triangle was a good idea," Ashley teased.
"It's just out of tune," Kelly laughed, taking the guitar from Kate and quickly tuning it before handing it back.
"You're good at that," Kate commented.
"Guitars? I'm ok. Knowing if a note is on pitch? That's kinda my job, right?" she smiled as Kate played the chords again. Her smile grew when they came out perfectly, "See? You're great."
"I wouldn't say great," Kate shook her head, playing a little bit.
"You're better than me," Kelly replied honestly. "I can play just enough to help me write. That's it."
"When did you start playing?"
"Just a few years ago. I grew up on piano."
"And violin," Ashley added.
Kelly narrowed her eyes.
"Wow...violin..." Jill smirked. "That's not nerdy at all."
"Don't be jealous of my skills," Kelly retorted.
"Are you any good?" Kate asked curiously.
"Actually, she really is," Ashley answered for her. "You should make her play for you, some time."
Kelly looked at her pointedly.
"What?" Ashley asked. "You are really good."
"You're still holding me back."
"How am I holding you back now? I'm totally talking you up."
Kate and Jill shared a confused look.
"Violin, Ash? Yea, that's totally the coolest instrument ever," Kelly replied sarcastically.
"Yea..." Ashley frowned slightly in realization. "I see what you mean. My bad...I'll just let you work your own mojo from now on."
"I appreciate that," Kelly smiled before turning back to Kate. "So, let's see what you got."
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Road Signs and Rock Songs