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Lost Without You	By : shebyra Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > Savage Garden Views: 1698 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know the members of Savage Garden. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Disclaimer: The
following is total fiction none of it really happened. (Well not that I’m aware of anyway!) I do not know Darren Hayes or Daniel Jones and I do not know their true sexuality. I do not mean any harm or disrespect to either of them.
When Kathy and I left the stage I excused lf alf and went to find Darren. He was in his dressing room. I knocked and he opened the door and invited me in. He was alone. I was glad, nice as Cassy seemed I felt we needed to be alone to talk in private.
“Great presentation mate! Get your words a little mixed?” he said with an impish grin. “Did the nerves get the better of you?”
“Yeah, I guess so.” Trust him to pick up on it!
“So you and Kathy are still together then? When’s the wedding? Will I get an invite?
“Yeah we’re still together and if there is a wedding I guess we’ll invite you. Would you accept?”
“Of course I’d accept, why wouldn’t I? But what do you mean if there is a wedding? You’re engaged aren’t you? Next step marriage, right?”
“That’s the way it usually goes I guess.”
“You don’t sound too sure. Do you think you made a mistake getting engaged?”
“I don’t know Dar; it seemed like a good idea at the time. Don’t get me wrong, I love her, it’s just it’s a big step. Am I really ready? I think at the very least it’s going to be a long engagement, we haven’t set a date yet.”
“Well like you say it’s a big step, you’d better make sure you’re both ready for it. Believe me a divorce is no fun to go through, I’d avoid that if I were you. I think if you really loved her enough and were ready to take that step you’d know, there’d be no doubts. While you have doubts, however small, don’t do it.”
“I’ve really missed this you know, talking to you. What happened? Why did we let it go? Can we get it back, what we had before?”
“Would you want everything we had before? Or just the friendship?”
“The friendship would be a start.”
“Yeah it would, but I don’t think it would be enough for me. I’ve really missed you Daniel. Couldn’t you tell when I was singing that song? Why do you think I chose that one? It was a tribute to Delta but I chose one of the few songs from her album that she didn’t actually write. That’s because it said everything that I feel about you. I didn’t know for sure if you would be here tonight but I figured you would probably watch the show if you weren’t. When I heard you were going to be here it was perfect, and when I saw you watching from backstage I was hoping you’d be able to tell I was singing to you. Could you tell?”
“So that was for my benefit? I thought maybe, but I hardly dared to think I was right. I’ve missed you too Darren.”
“Is that why you have doubts about marrying Kathy?”
“That’s part of it I guess.”
“Does she know about you and me? The true nature of our relationship?”
“No, she does not! And she’s not going to either, she’d freak!”
“And you don’t want to lose her? What about me?”
“What about you? We’re not together anymore in any way, why should my relationship with Kathy affect you?”
“Don’t you want me?”
“Darren, don’t do this!”
“Do what Danny? What am I doing? I’m only asking if you want me.”
“You know what you’re doing; you’re playing with my emotions again. You're very good at that. I can’t go through all that again! You’ve made it very clear in interviews that you don’t need me that you never want to go back, that you’re quite happy as you are thank you very much!”
“Danny do you really think I would do that to you? That was the public me talking in those interviews. In private it’s another thing altogether, believe me. I’ve never not wanted or needed you. But you seemed happy, you had Kathy and you were getting on with your life without me, doihat hat you really enjoyed. What was I supposed to do, sit around and mope? Tell everyone that I missed you like crazy, that I was lost without you? That was the truth but I had to hide my true feelings, I couldn’t let anyone know how I truly felt.”
“So you’re not really ‘where you want to be’?”
“Not even close Dan! I love you and if I don’t have you I’ll never be where I want to be. I know I hurt you I’m really sorry but you hurt me too. I’ll forgive you if you forgive me. What do you say?”
“There’s nothing I’d like better! So you still love me?”
“I never stopped loving you Danny, you’re everything to me you always have been and you alwwillwill be. You’re always right here in my heart.”
I couldn’t believe how well this was turning out. I’d been dreading meeting up with him again after all that had happened between us. Now here we were, not only talking again but Darren was telling me he still loved me.
“So do you still love me?”
“Of course I do Dar, as much as I ever did. If you want me back it will make my decision about me and Kathy a lot easier to make. I love her but not as much as I love you. It wouldn’t be fair on her to go through with getting married to her when I feel this way about you. Especially now I know you still feel the same way about me. I really thought it was over forever. You know I even thought Cassy was your girlfriend!”
“I know you did, I saw how you looked when I said I didn’t come here alone and introduced you to her.”
“So she really is just your P.A.? There’s nothing else between you? She’s very pretty.”
“She’s gorgeous Dan, but no although she is a friend as well as a P.A. we’re just good friends. If it wasn’t for my feelings for you then maybe I would try a relationship with her, but nothing has happened between us. I don’t even know if she would be interested in me anyway.”
“Does she know about us, what we were to each other?”
“No, but only because I didn’t think there was any reason for her to know. She’s very broad-minded I think she’d be cool about it if she did find out.”
“So are you going to tell her?”
“I don’t know, are we going to try again? If not there’s really no point in telling her.”
“If you really feel the same and want me back then yeah I would love for us to try again.”
“Great! That’s settled then. Welcome back Dan.”
I was suddenly so happy! I had Darren back, the one true love of my life. On the downside I now had to break the news to Kathy. I hoped she would understand when I told her it was over.
"So when will you tell Kathy you want to call off the engagement?"
“I guess I should tell her as soon as possible, but not tonight. I won’t tell her the real reason why I’m finishing with her; she doesn’t need to know that. I still don’t want people knowing about us, it’s only for us to know, right? They can know we’re friends again but that’s it!”
“Whatever you want babe. Would you mind if I did tell Cassy?
“Do you want to? Would she keep it a secret?”
“I don’t know if I do want to tell her, I just wanted to know how you would feel about it if I did want to tell her. I’m so happy right now I feel like shouting it from the rooftops! Anyway we’re pretty close and I might let something slip accidentally, I’d hate to hurt you again. She’s very discreet she’d keep the secret for us.”
“Ok if you feel you must, but only Cassy. I don’t want the whole world to know especially as our families don’t even know.”
“Neither does Leonie! You’d think after all this time she would have figured it out but no she still thinks we were only ever close friends. If only she knew how close!”
I felt myself blushing at the thought of just how close we had been. The nights when we were on tour sharing a room, making love. Of course everyone else thought we had our own adjoining rooms but we only ever used one! His shirt was half open and I could plainly see his bare chest beneath. Oh how I wanted him now, he still had the same effect on me. The way he was log atg at me, eyes full of lust, told me he was thinking the same thing. He looked deep into my eyes and ran his tongue across his lips.
“I want you, Danny! I need you.”
“I want you too!”
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Lost Without You