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You Learn To Love the Pain You Feel	By : heartgrenade13 Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > Green Day Views: 1521 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know the members of Green Day. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

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I took in every passing moment, slowly, painfully. I wasn't too sure of Billie. I couldn't be hurt again. I couldn't lose something precious again. Everything was a blur as he pulled my underwear down to my ankles. He crawled back up to waist level and got a child like grin on his face. "I sure have missed you." Billie whispered to my downstairs. "You've got such beautiful hair!" I covered my face with the same hands that had teased Billie before.

I sat on his lap and toyed with his blonde hair. Billie got up and grabbed me. He took me to the middle of the 70's wannabe dance floor. Flashing lights and smoke set the mood. Sweat poured down his velvet face. He had an innocent way about him yet, at the same time he was well aware of what he had and how to use it.

I could feel the music pulse throughout my once abused body. I needed someone to make me feel wanted. I needed to have some sort of a connection with someone. I placed my hand down Billie's pants and started playing with him as a downright plea to get him to make even more of a woman out of me. Finally I was comfortable with my past, or at least that fraction of it.

I now wrapped Billie's raven hair around my fingers. God he's gorgeous. "Uh. Shirl, you know, um..do remember down there on me?"

"Yes I do."

"Well, you seem like the type to like them big cause you know, your really into sex."

"I don't want a tiny penis, nor do I want a huge one...you just want a nice pound of flesh."

"Oh, so that means..my size?"

"No where near it, just messing with you dear. Yes your size."

My thoughts quickly turned as dark as night. I needed as much help as possible for my mental issues. He was amazing but was he just using me for sex? I couldn't trust him. I refused to.
I pulled myself away from him. I curled up to the head board and bit my lip. "What's the matter?"

"I can't do this again."

"Why not?"

"I don't think I'm ready to be let down...again." My voice shook with pain. I wanted to be with Billie in more ways than one. The only problem was I knew I could only be with him in a few of those ways. I began to scratching the surface of my skin with my nails. The crimson sorrow flowed out from my skin.

"I won't let you down."

"I'd love to believe you."

"Then believe."

"You’re sobering up aren't you?"

"Like it matters..you know it kind of does. It changes everything. Now I don't have the excuse that I'm drunk for fucking you. You know, like last time."

"So what's your excuse for wanting to now?"

"I'm horny?" He said it as if it was a question. As if he was seeing if it would work.

I released my grasp on myself and took in a deep breath. The room began spinning out of control as if I was losing my grasp on more than just myself. I was almost completely sober at that point and unsure of what was wrong.

"This is all cause of Eddy, huh?" Billie asked as if terrified of me.

"He wasn't a real man, because, I'm sorry, a real man gives head...get down, get busy, or get out." I only half joked as a sad attempt to lighten the mood.

"You can trust me." Obviously my "mood lightener" didn't work.

"You say that as if you believe I'll actually trust you."

"I won't cheat."

"You say that as if we're dating."

"I know we aren't really but I feel like we could make something great from this."

I stared blankly at him, not too sure what my next move should be. Billie stretched his arms wide open, inviting me to be held. I placed my body as close to his as physically possible. His arms closed and made me feel like I belonged somewhere for the first time in my life.

"God your tall!" Billie said as I stood up after just exiting his small car.

"As if it takes a lot to be taller than you."
I stumbled around the parking lot looking for something, what though I'm still not sure of. The wind brushed against my skin sending the goose bumps to pop right up. I felt a small finger make its way down my neck. I allowed my eyes to rest and my imagination to run wild.
We quickly made our ways to his room. I placed myself down on the feather filled pillows that were strategically placed on the bed. Billie ran his hands up my thighs. He cupped the tops of them. He slid his hands in between them slowly and pulled them apart at a snail like pace. I held my breath as he continued on with his journey to the unknown.

Mike was sitting on a chair across from the occupied bed. He was watching intently and taking in even the smallest details. I was already nearing an orgasm the second Billie inserted two fingers into me. "God, you’re wet."

My heart picked up speed and my eyes rolled into the back of my head. He knew what to do. He was experienced. I felt his warm breath on my cheek and this only added to the pleasure. He was getting off just to seeing me moaning and wriggling around below him. Those memories made me long for his touch more. I glanced up at Billie and laid a lot on the line. "Fuck me."

"Someone's perked up."

~~Ten Commandments of Love(By Ms. Shirley Manson)

#2

Thou shalt honor my bright-copper friend~~
He did say he liked the color. So that’s one out of two…not too bad, right?
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You Learn To Love the Pain You Feel