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The Small Hours	By : lunavin Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > Metallica Views: 2952 -:- Recommendations : 1 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know the members of Metallica. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Title: The Small Hours
Fandom: Metallica
Pairing: James/Cliff, James/Cliff/Jason, James/Jason
Rating: NC-17 overall, R this chapter
Warnings: Slash, dubious con
Disclaimer: I do not own Metallica, I do not know Metallica, These things never happened.
Summary: James and Cliff use to share groupies on tour, male and female. Before Jason was in Metallica, he was one of them. But James doesn't remember him.
This Chapter: Jason joins Metallica. Kirk remembers Jason. Flashbacks are in Italics.

Chapter Two: Welcome Home (Sanitarium)

It was little more than a year later when Kirk stood in front of a bathroom urinal at a bar discussing the future of Metallica now that Cliff Burton had died. It hadn't even been a month since the accident. Lars had turned all business on them and had quickly steered them towards finding a replacement bassist and finishing the Damage tour. Kirk had wanted to object, but could see how it might be beneficial to just keep moving and bury the shock with exhaustion.

James was doing the worst, hands down. At the moment he was using the bathroom wall to hold himself up; his eyes were unfocused staring at a spot in front of Kirk's shoes. The night of Cliff's death he had raged like a wounded lion running on so much pain and adrenaline that it took Kirk, Lars, and 3 roadies to slow him down. Kirk had cried that night, had felt truly wretched, but nothing could match the anguish in James face. But after that first night he had become stoically quiet and usually drunk. Cliff's sister at the wake was the only person he'd let near him.

"I say Jason," Lars said, "he already knows most of our bass tracks. Thank god for fans you know."

"You didn't like Les?" Kirk answered. He'd been impressed with Les Claypool's playing. The man was a born bassist.

"Yeah, he was awesome," Lars had been equally impressed. "But his style's different than Metallica, you know. Jason knows the songs. He plays them well. The jam session was cool. He writes for his current band and sings back-up, so there's that."

"Cliff loved that band," James piped in for the first time all night. Cliff had often listened to Flotsam and Jetsam, Jason Newsted's little thrash band. Jason was one of the bass players that they had invited specifically to audition. It was obvious Cliff saw something in Flotsam and Jetsam and Jason's playing.

Before they had started jamming, the band had spoken with Jason and asked some questions, almost like a real job interview. Kirk found that he instantly took to Jason, and conversation flowed freely between them. He had this odd sense of deja vu, too. Kirk knew who Jason was, no doubt, because of Flotsam and Jetsam. But he just had the feeling that they knew each other from before.

"Does that mean you agree about Jason?" Lars asked James.

"I like him," Kirk added. "I got along real well with him. It was almost like we knew each other already. Maybe a past life? Maybe it's like fate or something."

"I'm fine with Newkid." James ruffed out.

"It's Newsted," Lars corrected.

"Whatever."

Lars sighed. "All right then. That's settled. Objections?" Lars asked, but there were none. "Okay, let's go tell him."

The trio left the bathroom and headed to where they had left Jason at the bar. He was sitting alone staring into a Budweiser. Lars went and sat in the stool next to him and Jason turned his attention to the drummer. The other two members of Metallica stood behind Lars.

"So," Lars opened, "want a job?"

Jason started with a smile, and then a few hints of laughter before yelling "Woo-hoo!" on the spot.

________________________________________________

Kirk woke up the next morning on James and Lars' sofa. After informing Jason of their decision, the band had stayed at the bar making sure Jason drank until he vomited at least twice and had to be carried into a cab. Lars kept pouring Jason drinks and James sulked in a corner. Kirk carried Jason from the cab into the apartment.

Kirk sat up on the sofa and then slowly stood up to head over to the bathroom. He then tripped over Jason who was sprawled on the floor next to the couch. A completely hung over Kirk could not hold his balance and fell to the floor, half on Jason, half on the wooden crate Lars insisted was a coffee table.

"Oh, sorry, Jase," Kirk mumbled.

Jason grunted and tried to roll over onto his back as Kirk moved off him and sat on the floor with his back resting on the sofa.

"Where am I?" Jason said, his eyes still closed.

"James and Lars apartment. You all right?"

"No, not really. Am I still in the band?"

Kirk laughed softly, "Yeah, man. Welcome. I'm sure you'll live to regret it someday."

Jason opened his eyes and squinted over at Kirk. "That day might be this morning. I thought I could drink, but I got nothing on Lars."

"He's deceivingly small. You'll see."

"Yeah, I guess I will. Not particularly looking forward to telling my band I'm leaving them, though."

"We're you're band," Kirk corrected.

Jason smiled, "If it wasn't for the nausea, that would had made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside."

Kirk laughed again. "I was gonna wash my face and go for some coffee. There's a diner a block down the road. You wanna?"

"Uh, yeah sure. I should put something in my stomach; soak up the alcohol. What about Lars and James?"

"They won't be up for a awhile. I'm the early bird."

"All right. You use the bathroom first. I need some time before I can stand up properly."

________________

In little more than an hour, Kirk and Jason were sitting in the diner nursing some coffee. Jason had ordered some toast he was eating slowly.

"You know," Kirk began, "Cliff was a fan of Flotsam and Jetsam. He listened to that tape a lot."

"Really?" Jason smiled shyly.

"Yeah. It's pretty good. Did you always want to be a bass player?"

"Well, I was a big fan of KISS, and then you guys. I already knew so many other guys that played guitar; I'd figure it'd be easier to join a band if I played bass instead. And Cliff," Jason looked off into the distance, lost in a memory, "he was just so amazing. Such a great player, so amazing to watch him play..."

Jason trailed off, a mixture of awe and hurt flashing through his eyes. It was then that Kirk was certain he knew Jason from before. He knew that speech, and he was certain he'd seen the same look on Jason's face before.

"I know you don't I?" Kirk suddenly spoke out.

"Uh, yeah," Jason focused back on Kirk with confusion. "I'm your new bass player."

"No, we've met before. Haven't we? This is just way to much Deja vu to be having within 48 hours."

Jason paused and looked Kirk over a moment. "I'm a fan. I met you guys at the meet and greet during the Ride the Lightning tour."

"Oh," Kirk was almost satisfied, "what did we sign for you? Do you still have it?"

Jason looked taken aback. He scrambled for some form of answer. He was remembering that night now. At the meet in greet he had had a silver toned marker in his back pocket intending on asking the band to sign his Metallica t-shirt. But then Cliff had just started talking and talking to him and he had decided to wait for an opening and ask for an autograph, but then James came over, and then they asked him to hang out. He couldn't even remember what happened to that marker. And asking for an autograph was the furthest thing from his mind the next morning.

"Jason?"

He looked up at Kirk, "nothing. I didn't get anything signed."

"Everyone gets something signed at meet and greets, or at least a picture with the band."

Jason flinched at the words and looked away. Kirk was on the brink of remembering now, as he tried to scramble the thoughts in his head. How could Jason not have gotten an autograph? Why did the mention of getting his photo with the band seem to upset him? Why is that look of lost hurt on Jason's face so familiar?

"Oh, god," it suddenly hit Kirk what must have happened to Jason. And now he was about 90% sure he recalled from where he knew him.

It was the U.S. leg of the Ride the Lightning tour. Kirk was in the hotel lobby early in the morning going out for his customary cup of morning coffee. It was very seldom he drank the hotel coffee. Touring gave him the opportunity to travel, and he felt it a waste to spend his time abroad cooped up in a hotel room.

There was a guy about his age coming down the other set of stairs of the hotel. He had long curly hair and was wearing a Metallica t-shirt from the last tour. They're eyes met and the other guy looked away quickly seemingly embarrassed.

"Hey you!" Kirk called out to him. "Were you at the show last night?"

The guy looked up at him and responded with seeming nervousness, "yeah?"

"Cool. Are you from around here? Is there some place nearby I can get some coffee?" Kirk tried to be friendly; this guy was acting like a skittish cat.

"Um, yeah. If you just go down that way," he pointed, "and then make a right, there's a bakery/cafe three stores down."

"Thanks, man," Kirk said, "you wanna come? You know, in case I get lost?" Kirk tried to joke.

It had the opposite effect on the guy; his look became even more distressed.

"There's a cab there. I think it's for me,” he said.

Kirk gave him an appraising look. "Did you just come from Cliff and James' room?" he asked softly.

"Um, yeah."

Kirk sighed heavily. "We'll send the cab away. Okay? Just come with me and have some coffee, I'm not gonna molest you or anything."

The guy looked up at him then, with this look of lost hurt in his eyes. He nodded and the two went to get some coffee together.

"I remember you," Kirk said. "It was you, right? In Arizona?"

Jason nodded. "I didn't think anyone would remember me."

"I doubt that James remembers it. No offense, but he and Cliff did that kind of stuff often enough. I would see them sometimes, pushing some poor fan out the hotel room door. But I never spoke to them about it, wasn't my business. And I certainly didn't speak to any of the guys coming out of their room, not until I ran into you."

"Not exactly my finest moment."

"Why on earth did you want to join the band? You were pretty upset if I remember correctly."

Kirk had taken the guy, Jason, he'd learned, over for some coffee. Jason was pretty quiet the whole time and wouldn't meet his eyes often. Kirk knew that sometimes Cliff and James picked up a male fan and not a female one, but it wasn't until one night when he saw them laughing over some Polaroid’s that he realized that there was something rotten in the state of Metallica so to speak.

Kirk had experimented with having sex with guys, even with Lars on a couple of occasions. But he realized that at some point this must have turned into a game for the singer and bassist. He'd seen the guys coming out of the hotel rooms sometimes, and they always looked upset somehow.

"Look, I'm not exactly sure what James and Cliff do or how. They're kinda like a couple but they don't want to admit it, so they keep having all these threesomes, foursomes, orgies... Are you all right?"

"I'm fine, I guess. I just wasn't expecting that. I... well, I'm not gay... they said it didn't matter. I... but it felt good... I don't know."

"Fuck," Kirk ground out. "I really, really, don't want to have this talk with James or Cliff. But they really need to chill the fuck out."

"I'm not scarred or anything. At least I don't think so. Who'll know anyway? You said I'm just one of many, so soon It'll be forgotten," Jason said into his coffee.

"It's still a great band," Jason said. "And like I said, I didn't think anyone would remember me. I figured I was just one of many. Besides, you guys called me to audition. I thought I was going to burst from pride at that."

"Oh, god," a new thought occurred to Kirk, "maybe Cliff did remember you."

"Why would you think that?"

"Well, he was always listening to Doomsday for the Deceiver. You had just formed Flotsam and Jetsam right? Did you tell him about it?"

"Oh," Jason said, "you're sure James doesn't remember?" Jason soon started frowning again and a new thought occurred to him. "Did they take pictures of all the fans they... fucked?"

"No, just the guys for some reason," Kirk replied. "They use to keep them in this 'inconspicuous' shoebox, like if Lars and I didn't know what they were up to. Don't worry about that though. Cliff's family took everything off when he died. James kept his fave bass, Lars the picture of Cliff with Ozzy, and I took his leather jacket."

"Then there's no reason to tell James, right?" Jason looked hopeful.

"Ugh, damned if you do, damned if you don't," Kirk played out all the possible scenarios in his head. " It would be best, I think, if James didn't hear about this right now. You should probably tell him someday, but maybe we should at least finish the Damage Tour first."

"Deal," Jason said with relief.

"James, he's not doing to well right now with Cliff's death. I mean, none of us are, but like I said, I think they were in love, like for real. He's a controlling fuck, and Lars is turning into a real bossy bastard now. But they're real great guys to be friends with actually, the closed fist and all that. So, just take it easy and try not to get offended, it's just a bad time right now. Unfortunately, you're in the middle of it."

"Thank you," Jason said wholeheartedly. "I know this can't be easy for anyone. I just hope it all works out."

__________________________________________

When Kirk and Jason returned to the apartment Lars and James were sitting on the couch in front of the TV.

"And what the hell is wrong with my coffee you dicks?" Lars yelled in way of greeting while holding a mug of said coffee.

"It tastes like piss," Kirk said.

"Can't argue that," James piped in, but took a sip of his own mug anyway.

"Two hours, okay?" Lars was all business again, "Then we'll go down to the studio for some rehearsals with Jason before we get back on the Damage tour. I got this idea last night about making an EP next instead of a full album. You know, to get the fans use to Jason. I called for a photographer to come in today, get some pics of us. Then we'll have something to get to the magazines as soon as possible."

Jason sat by on the love seat. "Just tell me what you want me to do.”
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The Small Hours