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A Certain History	By : Redneckgirl Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > Slipknot Views: 2446 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know the members of Slipknot. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Lying on her back and staring up at the ceiling as Jim slept soundly next to her Jade could hardly believe the time had crept up on her with quite the speed it had. She would be flying home in a day’s time, and away from the man whose company she knew she was going to miss terribly. Not to mention the sex too. She would miss everything and everyone from the last thirteen months of touring, it was no over exaggeration when she classed it as the time of her life. Turning over onto her side and watching him sleep Jade reached out and stroked a stray piece of his hair from his forehead, and felt her heart grow a little heavy. If it had been a different time or another place, he would have probably been her boyfriend by now, but it wasn’t to be. As she had said to herself in Japan, all he was going to be to her was what he was already. A fuck buddy, end of.

Sighing as she got up quietly out of bed and pulling on a pair of his jeans which were at least a foot too long for her legs Jade padded quietly out of the bedroom and headed downstairs. Entering the living room she was surprised to see Gibson curled up in his cosy little cat bed rather than out chasing mice or rats as usual. He stirred as she walked past him and gave her a little meow, and Jade reached down and tickled him under the chin before sitting on the couch and reaching for her cigarettes, and video camera. She lit up and opened the viewfinder; pressing play and seeing the memories captured on film from the tour begin to flash across the screen. Immediately she started to laugh, even though she had only viewed them earlier when Emma had visited she played the tape through again, treasuring every moment she saw.

From Craig swinging from a vent pipe with a banana stuck out of his fly and Jess coming along and biting it off, to the incident when all the guys in the ‘knot were ripping shreds off Joey for being small and ‘not being a real man’ when she and Jen had come to his rescue and said they were going to take him to bed and turn him into one (and dragging him by his hair to his bunk while everyone roared laughing), to Sid and Jo beating each other with spiked belts, to Chris’ now famous incident running through the hallways with a near naked Jen over his shoulder, to a shot of her and Jim downing the latter’s own cocktail of a drink known as an IRA car bomb (a pint of Guinness with a shot of Baileys and Jameson’s whisky dunked in) in a pub in London, it was all there, and it made her feel slightly less sad as she sat smoking in the darkness.

Just then, a video of her and her uncle Jamie having an argument over which out of Scarface and The Godfather was better (Jade voting staunchly for Scarface) came on. Paul had picked up the camera in the kitchen of her grandfathers home one afternoon and was dying of laughter behind the lens as Jade and Jamie both shouted over each other, in the end Jamie pretending to throttle Jade and her trying to push him off his seat. She watched it for only a few seconds before she could watch it no longer, the pain of losing him surfacing in her heart as she saw him smiling at the camera. Turning off the stream of images before it ended she got up and walked over to the window, taking a seat on the side sill and sighing as once again thoughts of her uncle clouded her mind.

‘Jamie, why can’t you be here now? You know that chat we had? Well, I think I changed my mind, but how do I tell him that?’ said Jade, looking up to the heavens as she twirled the thick onyx and gold ring he had left her in his will on her thumb, which she still hadn’t taken off since her uncle Joseph had pressed in into her palm at the funeral. She’d felt herself starting to fall for Jim since being in his home where it was just the two of them, finding out more about the man she slept with, and liking it too. But it just wouldn’t work, it was a done deal already. She sighed again and lit another cigarette and was joined by Gibson, who stealth along the floor so quietly she jumped when he clamoured up the side of the curtain to stand on her shoulder.

‘Do you wanna tell your owner I’m crazy about him? I don’t think I’m brave enough to. Knowing what answer I’d get kinda makes it difficult too’ said Jade as Gibson rubbed his face against hers and purred. Was she crazy about him though? Or was she just mixing up feeling of great friendship and hot sex and trying to turn them into something else? She knew if she said anything she risked blowing their friendship completely, but somewhere in her mind she thought that if he really was interested in her, he’d use the last day he had in her company to tell her.

‘I hope you can hear me Jamie, but if there is such a thing as a spirit, I’d like yours to visit me now. I need you, and I miss you’ said Jade as tears began to fall from her eyes. Just as she put her head down to weep Gibson knocked a heavy bookend right off the shelf above her. Darting out of the way Jade suddenly realized Gibson couldn’t have knocked it off as he was still sitting on the sill behind her. She was in disbelief until she felt her thumb with Jamie’s ring on it growing hot, and then heard his voice.

‘I’m always with you, so you don’t need to ask me to come back’ he said, yet when Jade span around there was no one there, but she knew it was him, which made her cry all the more as she sat down on the carpet and silently wept, for Jamie, for herself, and for the mess her own heart had gotten her into. Once she was seated on the floor Jade suddenly had two thoughts straight after the other. If Jamie's spirit was really with her, would he want her to be acting like this over something they had spoken about and resolved between them? It had all come to a head in Sicily and that was where it would stay; past. She then realized she was making the critical mistake Charlotte had warned her about at around the time it had begun.

'Sex is sex, and when that's all it is never try to turn it into a relationship, never works' she had said, shaking her head. She was right, the set up had been perfect for the time, but if they were to get together how long would it be before they would even see each other again? Slipknot were to go on a tour as headliners in three months time for fourteen months and she would be spending the next year locked in a studio writing and recording the album. No, it made perfect sense for thing to end like this; except he would still be her friend. Jade got up and walked back to the window, lighting a cigarette as she watched the sun begin to come up.

As the dawn spilled light across the creepy looking field with its waist high tall grass at the back of the house Jade felt like all her problems were being left back in the darkness as the new day shed new light on everything. Crushing out her half smoked cigarette in the ashtray Jade left the lounge and headed back upstairs to the bedroom, finding Jim lying on his stomach with an arm across the vacant pillow. She carefully moved it over and got into bed, resting it over her chest as she lay on her back and closed her eyes, and then felt his hand move and squeeze her right breast.

'Morning' he mumbled into the pillow before turning to face her.

'Hey you' she said quietly with a smile, watching as he re tied his hair in the black elastic and then lay down on his back again. He looked so beautiful; he had a defined yet not muscular body, more lithe than anything. And his eyes were amazing, sometimes she would look at them and see shades of green, amber and blue in amongst the brown.

She remembered sitting on a fountain edge with him when they had been given a week of downtime and all flown to Prague to party, and just looking at his eyes, how the sunlight reflected their various shades, and how he had put his arms around her and pulled her into his chest like he had just done in the present. She lay down with her head against his chest and felt his hand slide around to her ass and just gently cup it in his hand. She kissed his nipple and smiled up at him, and then just lay back down and enjoyed feeling him there next to her.

'I'm going to miss waking up to a woman' said Jim, rubbing his eyes and turning over onto his side, wrapping both arms around Jade as he pulled the covers right up over the both of them to keep out the November cold.

'You'll have to find yourself a replacement' said Jade as she stroked his back.

'I could, but I can guarantee she wouldn't be anything like you. I didn't think it could be possible for a woman to be so great in bed. Or just so great in general, I meant it when I said you’ve become one of my best friends' said Jim, beginning to run a hand up and down her leg and over her thigh. Jade just looked up at him, gave him a little kiss and smiled, then just lay there listening to him breathe until she felt back to sleep.

‘Are you sure you don’t want me to cancel his appointment and come with you?’ asked Jim later that day as Jade sat on the stairs with her luggage around her, waiting for the cab that would take her to the airport. His mother had booked Gibson in to have his teeth and claws trimmed at the vets on that day and his appointment was twenty minutes before Jade’s plane took off, meaning Jim couldn’t take her to the airport himself.

‘Nah dude it’s okay, don’t worry about it’ said Jade with a smile as she fussed the cat in question who was sat on her lap, observing a fly dancing around the light in the hall. They sat for a few moments in total silence, before that was broken by the cabbie tooting his horn outside. Jim opened the door and was greeted by the driver who took Jade’s two cases and ambled off down the driveway to put them in the trunk while the two J’s said goodbye.

‘Come here gorgeous, I’m gonna miss you’ said Jim, bending to hug Jade tight as she rested her chin on his shoulder.

‘I’ll miss you too big man. I would say I’ll see you soon but I can’t as I don’t know when we’ll see each other again’ said Jade, her hand stroking the back of his neck.

‘Yeah I know, but hopefully our paths will cross again soon. And you call me as soon as you land okay?’ said Jim, letting her go but keeping his hands on her shoulders.

‘So, do I get a kiss goodbye then?’ asked Jade, reaching down to pick up her last bag and swing it over her shoulder. Jim bent down again and kissed her cheek, his hand holding her head and stroking her hair for a brief moment before he pulled away.

‘Is that all I get?’ she asked, her tone amused. He just nodded in reply.

‘Don’t forget to call me when you land JB, see ya’ he said with a fleeting smile as Jade took one last look at him and turned to walk towards the cab. She turned back to the house before she got in and saw he was gone, door closed. Sighing she opened the door and got in, telling the driver the destination and pulling out her mini disc player and jamming the headphones into her ears as they set off. Back at the house, Jim was still on the other side of the door, his back pressed into the smoky glass pane as he felt like someone had drained away his energy. He had managed to say goodbye to her, but kissing her goodbye or watching her leave was something he just couldn’t do. He stayed in the same spot, but slid down the door until he was seated, then just let out a long sigh and closed his eyes for a few moments.

‘I know, I’m stupid aren’t I?’ he said when Gibson meowed at him and settled himself in his lap. If cats could talk Gibson would have said yes.
Sitting in the departure lounge Jade waited for her flight alone, save a few fans that politely approached her for an autograph or photo. She picked at the purple nail varnish that had flaked beyond repair on her nails and thought back to when she had left Jim’s place. She was glad about not saying anything to him about the way she thought she might be feeling, as he couldn’t have looked less interested at her departure from his life. And why should he? He wasn’t her boyfriend after all.

With this in mind Jade stood up as she heard her flight was now boarding and made her way to the gate. She gave the woman at the desk her ticket and looked over her shoulder towards the doors one last time before taking the stub back off the smiling blonde wearing too much pink lipstick and walking down towards the plane, away from Iowa, and away from Jim. As they took off Jade looked out of the window at the bleak scenery, feeling tears roll down her cheeks. She really was going to miss what she had left behind, just as Jim sat in the waiting room of the vets practice with Gibson meowing his head off in displeasure of being in his travel basket thinking he would miss what was flying away from him. But he would see her again, he knew that much. And it would be a long time before he did, eleven months to be precise.
Their paths crossed again when the Ozzfest rolled into California ten months later and Jade and her girls turned up to see the boys. He had expected to see her there since she told him over the phone they were attending, but there was something about her that he didn’t expect to see when their eyes met again across the backstage area, something he didn’t expect at all.
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A Certain History