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Without You I'm Nothing (Chapter 39 up now!)	By : urbanephoenix Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > Placebo Views: 5829 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is purely a work of fiction! I do not know any members of Placebo or their families, and I do not profit from these writings.

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STEFAN.

“No.”

Mr. Olsdal frowned, looking at Stefan as though he’d just grown an extra limb. “What do you mean, “no”? It’s not up for debate.”

This really was the last thing Stef needed right now. “I’m not going. You can go, but I’m staying here.”

“But, sweetie!” His mother approached him looking worried. “You loved living in Sweden! We’ll be back with the family again.”

“I love living here now! All my friends are here. I’m not moving. I’ll move into the boarding school!”

“You think we’re going to fork out MORE money to send you to the bloody boarding school? Think again, mister.”

Stef rolled his eyes. Like his father had ever been concerned with money. “I’ll get a job and pay the difference, just please don’t make me move!”

“Fine! The sooner the better!” his father roared, throwing his arms up. “In fact, great, that means we can leave sooner than planned. You, find yourself a bloody job!”

***

Stefan couldn’t sleep. Why did this have to happen now? He had less than one year left of school and his family decided to move. Fine, he didn’t need them around.

Though, the prospect of living AT school was a daunting one. At least it’d keep him out of trouble. Mostly.

He rolled over, looking at his bedside table. The blonde traced his finger over the creased piece of paper stuck to it. “Transire suum pectus mundoque potiri”. Yes, it would be ok.

BRIAN.

“This is great! Just think, with your parents gone you can do… anything!”

Stef looked down at him, clearly not convinced. “It’s boarding school, Brian. I have to LIVE at school… and get a job” he sighed.

“Still,” Brian shrugged. “better than leaving the country eh?”

“True, although I’m a bit worried how easily my father gave in. It’s like he didn’t even want me there.”

“Don’t worry. I want you here. Look, after school we can go job hunting together.

***

For some reason, Brian had assumed they’d find it easy to get a job. He was wrong. Turns out not many businesses were looking for a tall, lanky teenager and his petite, eyeliner-wearing friend. They tried department stores, restaurants, convenience stores, everything within a reasonable walking distance.

“Briiiiiiiian!” Stefan whined. “We’ve been looking for ages, can’t we just… give up for today?”

“Oh come on! There’s still a record store, a grocery shop and a second-hand clothes place down here.”

The grocery store was a bust, the large, hairy owner glaring them out.

“Record store would be great,” Brian sighed. “Just think, all day listening to music.”

Stef laughed. “Oh there’s got to be more to it than that. They’re probably not even hiring.”

The pair entered the small, dark shop, greeted by Roxy Music blaring out of the speakers. Scattered around the narrow entrance were depressed looking 20-somethings, tight jeans, big hair and tapes in hand.

“Hi, are you the owner?” Brian asked, approaching the oldest-looking person in the store. He was well-dressed and oozed charisma.

“That’s me.” he smiled.

“My name is Brian, and this is Stefan. We were wondering if you’re hiring at the moment.”

“Randy,” the manager said, shaking their hands. “nice to see young people with initiative. As it turns out I do need someone. Mostly stocking duties. You fellas into music?”

The pair nodded.

“Ever had a job before?”

They shook their heads.

“How old are you?

“18…”

“Almost 20!” Brian smiled. He had this one in the bag, surely being older and wiser would work in his favour.

“Stef, come in on the weekend for a trial shift?” Randy asked.

“Huh? But… I’m older!” the black haired boy protested.

“Sorry mate. I can’t afford to pay someone who is “almost 20”. 18 is pushing it. I hear the mob down the road are hiring though?”

STEFAN.

Walking home Stef couldn’t help but smile. It may have taken them all afternoon, but job hunting hadn’t been as bad as he’d expected. “Oh cheer up.” He laughed, looking down at Brian. “At least you’ve got a test run at that clothing place.”

“Yeah,” the smaller boy muttered. “I’ll get to spend my weekends and afternoons with old ladies and creepy men who collect frocks.”

“Isn’t that a bit hypocritical?”

“Oi! I’m not creepy!”

Opening his front door, the first thing Stef noticed was the emptiness. Pictures had been removed from the walls, tables replaced with boxes. “Muuuuuuuuuuuuuuuum?!” he called out.

“Yes deary? Oh! You’ve got company!”

“Oh yeah mum, this is Brian. Where’s… everything?”

“You didn’t forget we’re mo-“

Stefan rolled his eyes. “Of course I didn’t forget but that conversation was last night! When are you moving, this weekend?!”

Mrs. Olsdal blushed a little “Well, yes. We were going to wait until your Autumn break but now since we don’t have to we can leave earlier.”

“But I don’t have a job yet! I haven’t applied for the boarding school!”

“You can keep living here until we sell it, honey. Don’t worry.” She kissed him on his cheek and left. Stef had never felt so abandoned. It was one thing for his parents to leave the country, but another entirely for them to do so so instantly, and without consulting him.

BRIAN.

Brian followed his friend up the stairs to his room. Stef was visibly upset.

“Why does everyone keep leaving me!?” he yelled, slamming his bedroom door.

Brian felt a little hurt. “I… I’m not leaving you?”

“Courtney left me, now my own parents? Jesus, nobody fucking wants me.” He kicked his desk chair over and collapsed on the bed, head in hands.

“I want you.” The smaller boy smiled, sitting beside him. “It’ll be ok. You’ll get this job and it’s not like you’ll never see your family again.”

Stef sighed and smiled ever so slightly. “It’s not so much that they’re leaving, it’s more… I don’t want to be alone. I know that sounds silly, but losing all this unconditional love is a bit frightening.”

Brian put his arm around his friend, resting his head on the blonde’s broad shoulder. “Don’t worry. I’m here, and I always will be.”

The phone rang, making Brain jump in surprise. He was amazed with how fast Stef leaped to answer it.

“Hello? Oh hi! Isn’t it a bit… late for you to be calling? Your time I mean?”

Oh, it was Courtney.

“Oh so you called me to put you to sleep did you?” Stef laughed. Brian scowled.
“Look uh… I’m really sorry but now isn’t a great time. I’ll give you a call around nine your time? Ok, hope you get to sleep. Good night. I… yeah… you too.”

Stef hung up the phone and walked back to the bed. “Sorry,” he blushed. “just… yeah…” he looked down at the floor.

“What’s going on with you guys now?” Brian knew it was none of his business but he was having trouble grasping this long distance thing.

“Nothing just… I don’t really want to talk about it.” Stefan muttered.

“Fine, look, I guess I should go-“

“No!” the blonde jumped up. “No, please stay.”

Brian smiled. “Stef, I can’t stay here all night, as much as I’m sure we’d both like that.” He ran his finger along his friend’s jaw line, finishing on his lips. “I have homework to do.”

“I’ll do it for you!”

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” The black haired boy grinned, heading for the door. He felt two strong hands pull him back and spin him around. Before he had time to realize what was going on, he felt Stef’s body pushed up against him.

He hit the door hard, pushed down by the weight of his friend. Stef ran his hands under Brian’s shirt; not desperately like their encounter in the music room, but passionate and needy.

STEFAN AND BRIAN.

This was the first time Brian had felt Stef kiss him for real. There was no fear or aggression, just ardor. Something he hadn’t felt in a long time.

The blonde loved feeling the older boy beneath him, in all his beautiful detail. Being in control of everything gave him such a thrill, but this was different than before.

Brian started undoing his own buttons but Stef stopped him, smiling. “Leave it on. You look sexy in a shirt.”

Instead, the black haired boy got to work on removing the other clothing keeping them apart. Pants, ties, and Stef’s shirt all tossed aside as if they were nothing.

The blonde looked down to admire his smaller friend who was staring up at him with those beautiful green eyes, looking so cheeky, but with such child-like innocence.

Brian knew what he wanted, but was afraid of upsetting Stef, the last thing he wanted to do.

“Stefan,” he moaned softly as he felt soft lips brushing against his neck. “S… St… lie down on the bed.”

Stef obeyed, unsure of what to expect. Brian crawled on top of him on all fours, hair draped over most of his face. The taller boy stiffened up as he felt the four walls closing in on him. He felt trapped and started to panic. “No… no, no…”

“Shh, it’s ok. It’s me.” He smiled. “You need to relax, everything will be ok.”
Brian gently kissed Stef on his lips to reassure him. “I love you.”

Stefan’s eyes widened as he heard those last three words, but before he could respond he felt his friend’s warm mouth back upon his own. Delicate fingers running through his hair, Brian’s loose shirt tickling his stomach. He relaxed his body, giving in to the soft touch and hot breath on his face.

“B… Bri?” he whispered, not wanting to ruin the moment. “I-“

Brian smiled. “It’s ok, I know.” He ran his hands down to Stef’s hips, happy to see his friend’s underwear of choice had improved since their first encounter. He tugged at the elastic, pulling his briefs down to leave Stef completely naked lying on his back. He had his eyes tightly shut and Brian could tell he was still nervous. “Trust me.” He soothed.

The black haired boy positioned himself between Stef’s legs and ran his hands firmly down his torso, massaging his hips and lower down to his thighs. It wasn’t supposed to be erotic, he just wanted his friend to relax. It worked a little too well, as Brian felt the body beneath him turn into putty, reacting to his every movement. He leant down and started lightly running his mouth up Stef’s torso to his hips gently kissing around his pelvic bone, long hair brushing against his sensitive cock.
Stefan shuddered at the sudden touch, bucking his hips and tightening his grip on the mattress. He started breathing deeper, keeping his cool as Brian moved closer and closer to- “Ugh!” Stef gasped as he felt a soft, wet tongue run along the shaft of his half-flaccid cock. The teasing was driving him mad, but he wasn’t frustrated. It was nice, for once they could take their time.

Re-positioning himself, Brian knelt between Stef’s legs, carefully circling his tongue around the head of his cock just enough to instigate lust. He could tell it was working, Stefan was so hard already and he’d hardly done anything.

“S-stop before you get carried away.” The blonde giggled, motioning for Brian to come further up the bed. Wrapping his arms around Brian’s slim figure, Stef pulled him close, tasting just a hint of his own pre-cum. “You are so beautiful.” He muttered, admiring the smaller boy, drowning in his over-sized school shirt and tight underwear.

“Can I get back to work now?” Brian asked cheekily, making his way back down the bed. He started licking more aggressively, eventually letting Stef’s cock enter his mouth entirely, sucking on it slowly. He peaked up, smiling at the look of ecstasy plated across the blonde’s face. It was nice to know his work was appreciated.

Stefan was in heaven. He had a very short sexual history with...well… anyone, but he was sure this was what it was meant to be like. He’d enjoyed being with Brian before, but this was something else entirely. Though, he couldn’t help but wish he’d hurry up so he could take him just like he’d been thinking about all day. He ran his long fingers through Brian’s hair, gently coaching his head down lower, forcing more of his cock down the smaller boy’s mouth. God, he was good at it.

As much as Brian wanted it to last, sucking on Stef’s erection wasn’t doing him any good keeping calm. While many people were repulsed by the idea of performing oral sex, Brian loved it. There was something so powerful about making someone so aroused with one’s mouth. “Ready?” he asked softly.

Stef nodded, his eyes still tightly shut. “W-wait.” He muttered, as Brian climbed up into his lap.

“Think of it this way, if I’m up here, you can relax and just… watch.” The black haired boy smiled. He wanted to do things like this for more than just that, he wanted to show Stef that he didn’t have to be in control for it to be good, ease him back into it.

“O..k. Do you want lube?” he asked, opening a bedside drawer.

Brian was a little surprised. “You own lube now?” he chuckled.

Stefan blushed. “Well… just in case.”

Leaning over Stef once more, Brian looked him in the eye. “I mean what I said before.” With no further warning he slowly leant back onto Stef’s wet cock, making the taller boy moan.

Brian gritted his teeth as he felt himself being forced open. He had gotten used to feeling Stef but besides the other day at school, it had been a while since he’d had sex with… anyone. It was a good feeling, to say the least.

He relaxed his knees, impaling himself further onto Stef, continuing to do so at a slow and steady pace. After a minute or so, Brian had adjusted enough to be enjoying himself, most of all being able to admire his lover’s body. He knew Stef had been very self-conscious about his appearance since the incident with Michael, but Brian thought he looked perfect.

“It’s ok, it’s ok, it’s ok…” the blonde kept telling himself. He had been uncomfortable with Brian being on top of him at first, but he was easing into it. He was being so gentle and careful. Stef ran his hands down the smaller boy’s waist, grasping him softly by the hips. He subtly pulled him down, trying to keep the rhythm.

Brian smiled, blowing hair out of his face. He quickened his pace, throwing the other boy off. In their past encounters he’d always cum first, not today. He’d had plenty of practice in this position. Stef was starting to look slightly exacerbated, his face tightened, he was clearly trying to hold back as much as possible.

“Come on, baby,” Brian said softly. “you know you want to.”

Stef’s body jolted as his friend started forcing himself on him harder, and faster. The sound of his voice sending shivers up his spine. ‘No, not yet, not yet’. His body had other ideas; not being able to hold back any longer, Stefan felt that familiar warmth spread through his body as he came hard into Brian. ‘Damnit,’ he thought. ‘that wasn’t the plan.’ “O… off.” He muttered.

Brian frowned, disappointed. He was so close to completion himself, but carefully pulled himself off of his friend’s shrinking erection.

“Lie down.” Stefan told him, scrambling to get on his knees.

Tentatively taking the blonde’s place, Brian rested his head on the pillow, watching Stef lean over him, planting a soft kiss on his mouth. “Thank you.” He whispered.

Before he had time to take anything else in, Brian felt his hard cock engulfed by heat and a familiar soft, wet feeling. Stefan had shoved his entire length into his mouth and was sucking mercilessly, clearly aware how close his friend was to the edge.

Brian leant back, his eyes rolling back as he sunk into an inescapable state of bliss. Stef was becoming a master of sucking cock. It didn’t take long. Stefan carefully licking up every trace of cum he could find.

He crawled up the bed to lie next to Brian, who was still coming down from his orgasm; his school shirt now drenched in sweat clung to his delicate body.

“I missed… tasting you,” the blonde muttered. “is that weird?”

Brian smiled. “No, it’s sweet.” He kissed him lightly on the forehead and pulled off his shirt.

Stef stroked his friend’s hair softly and pulled him in closer so their hot, damp bodies were pressed together. “Will you stay?” he asked.

“How could I leave?” Brian kissed him again, this time hard on the lips, his tongue forcing its way through a barrier of teeth. Stefan quickly kissed him back, loving the feeling of their mouths joining together, tasting his friend in all his intimate detail.

STEFAN.

Stef woke up with a headache. Served him right for falling asleep at six, he told himself. Snuggled into his pillow, laying right next to him, was Brian. Looking so peaceful, so beautiful. His naked body dimly lit by the light from the hallway creeping under the bedroom door.

Stefan looked at his clock. Shit, he was supposed to call Courtney half an hour ago. Oh well, not much he could do now. He got up and tried looking around for his briefs in the dark, eventually finding them on the other side of the room.

“What time is it?” came a sleepy voice from the bed. Brian stretched out, yawning softly.

“Almost one,” Stef replied, laying back down on the bed. “we must have both fallen asleep right after…”

Brian smiled. “That was different.”

“Different how?”

“Well,” Brian propped himself up on his side. “it wasn’t like the other times. It wasn’t just sex, it was… making love.”

Stef laughed. “Oh I’m sorry dear, I didn’t realize it was your time of the month.”

Brian smacked him playfully. “I’m serious! There was a connection, a deep connection, something beyond lust and just wanting to get off. Besides, who snuggles after ‘just sex’?” he grinned.

It was a good point. Stef agreed it wasn’t quite like the other times they’d been together, but ‘making love’ sounded like such a tacky title.

“Whatever you want to call it, gorgeous.” He kissed Brian on his nose and pulled the covers back over them, resting back on the pillow.

BRIAN.

He was sure Stefan agreed with him, he was just… confused. Yeah, that was all. Brian flipped over on his back, looking up at the ceiling. He could see the faint outline of where something used to be taped there.

“Stef?” he asked softly, still looking at that same spot. “You know how I told you… before… that I uh… I loved you?” this was hard for him to say, and he realized the timing probably wasn’t the best, but he had to ask. “Do you… love… me?”

There was a long pause, during which Brian held his breath, expecting the worst. Yelling, crying, ruining their friendship. Oh God, he shouldn’t have asked. What had he done?

After almost a minute of silence, he turned his head to look at Stef. He was sound asleep.

---------------
A/N:
1. Tell me if you want more, I realise by chapter 20 some people may have lost interest. I have a pretty good idea of where everything is going but there's no point continuing if nobody wants to read it =p

2. If anything I write about sounds similar to other Placebo fics it's totally unintentional. I'm only reading two at the moment and mine isn't like either of them, if it looks like I'm stealing ideas from other stories, it is a coincidense. I've never even read them.

3. Feel free to correct me, call me out on stuff. I was writing the sex scene in this while doing my essay for Theology (religion) class lol. That was interesting.
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Without You I'm Nothing (Chapter 39 up now!)