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Miwaku no Zakuro	By : Tcharlatan Category: > Kyo/Kaoru Views: 2861 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of pure fiction. I do not personally know any of the members of Dir en grey, X Japan, or KISAKI, and do not profit from this work.

Chapter List
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One long finger – graced with a small, curling tattoo along the back – pressed a plastic button delicately. Music flared up out of the box abruptly, static-laden at first, then smoothing out into a clear, if somewhat tinny, beat. Despite the poor sound quality, the man operating the little alarm clock radio sighed in bliss. His master evidently shared some of his musical tastes, because the radio was always tuned to the station that he would have chosen.
Settling onto the narrow bench tucked into the bay window to bask in the morning sunlight, Kyo tucked his legs beneath himself comfortably, resting his most valued treasure in his lap as he flipped it open. The notebook was a terribly simple thing – just a plain black cover binding pristine white pages – but he considered it to be the greatest reward his master had ever given him. It gave him a catharsis he was unable to find anywhere else; doodles, poems, and free-form writing serving as an outlet for the constant swarming thoughts that bounced around his head in the quieter hours of the day.
Worried that the scratches on the wall in his room would become too noticeable as they multiplied, he’d also transferred his tally-mark calendar onto the first page of the book. He resolutely ignored the niggling worry that a single page might not be enough space for the number of days he was to stay there. With a steady hand, he added the fifth dash to the sixth cluster on his calendar before flipping through to a half-finished drawing he’d started the day before. His motions were unhurried as he resumed work on the image; he had nothing but time until Kaoru came back from work.
‘Thirty days…’
‘I’ve been here an entire month, now.’
‘I wonder… how long will He need me?’
Kyo had surreptitiously asked Toshiya about his master’s previous companions last Saturday. He hadn’t been able to get much out of the man before Kaoru came back, but apparently his master had gone through a great number of pets, keeping a couple for as little as two days. The one before Kyo – Die had pointed her out, a bombshell blonde named Nozomi with legs that went on forever and jealous green eyes – had been the longest lived, serving Kaoru for six straight months before he sent her back to the courtesan house. No one really knew why he kept some longer than others, or why he dismissed some who seemed to have kept him perfectly happy.
Tapping his pencil eraser against his lower lip, he frowned a bit.
‘He’s been… restless lately…’
‘All weekend, now that I think about it.’
‘He doesn’t seem upset, at least…’
‘But definitely edgy.’
It was a disquiet that he couldn’t seem to touch, in spite of his best efforts. Kaoru was often stressed by his work, but Kyo had been quickly learning how to deal with the various levels of the man’s temper with reasonable success until now. Very mild irritation could be soothed away with simple touches; Kyo curling himself up against his master’s chest as he was fed dinner, sidling against him on the couch or rubbing his neck while he watched television. Higher forms of frustration could be sucked out of him, though Kyo was still working on how to feel out when he would benefit more from a leisurely blowjob versus when he needed to be overwhelmed.
It went a long way toward preventing him from getting upset by things at work, but Kyo had been surprised to realize that Kaoru very rarely seemed to want sex when he was angry. Other than the night Kyo had shocked him out of a temper with a drug-hazed romp, every time they’d been together, Kaoru had already been in a good mood. Including that very morning, when his master had summoned him out of his cell early and taken him against the shower wall. His knees were still a bit wobbly from that particular encounter.
‘He seemed happy enough when He left, but still…’
‘It’s like He’s… anxious about something…’
‘I wish I could ask Toshiya… he would know, I bet.’
It was only Monday and Kaoru seemed content to only take Kyo out of his quarters on the weekends. Unless there was another “emergency” requiring Toshiya to help Kyo calm a particularly bad fit, he probably wouldn’t be seeing the blue-haired man soon enough to do any good. Sighing unhappily, he shook his head and went back to his drawing. Kaoru’s restlessness unnerved him.
‘I’ll have to figure it out, if it doesn’t clear up soon…’
‘I guess I could try-’
The door to the bedroom unlocked and opened in one swift click, startling Kyo badly; he hadn’t heard the front door open or close, or footsteps coming down the hall. Kaoru was standing in the doorway, pinning him in place with an unusually intense gaze, and he found himself staring back with a frozen deer-in-headlights sort of expression. For a long, tense moment, everything was still, the only sound between them the clamor of music pouring out of the radio. Then Kaoru was moving with long, purposeful strides to cross the room, one finger coming down on the OFF button with just the slightest bit too much force. Kyo dazedly registered the glowing numbers on the clock’s display: 10:53 AM. Kaoru had hardly been gone two hours.
“M-… Master?” he murmured uneasily when the silence stretched on too long for his comfort. “You… you’re back early…?”
Kaoru crossed his arms over his chest, looking somewhat tense. “I couldn’t focus on my work. I was planning on holding off on this for a while longer, until you were settled in a little better but… I need you to do something for me, Kyo. If you can.”
‘He called me by my name…’
‘He never calls me by my name.’
‘He looks even more worked up than He was before…’
Kyo closed his notebook and set it on the window bench carefully. “What is it?”
“Come with me.”
Kaoru turned on one heel and stalked out of the room, and Kyo was quick to follow, eyeing his master uncertainly. The older man was practically humming now with that agitated energy and it leant an almost predatory grace to his every movement. Kyo was mildly surprised to find them following the familiar path to the tea room, but what struck him dumb was Kaoru walking up to a wall the blonde had been certain was solid and opening a small panel, revealing a door handle. Though Kyo saw no key or pin pad, he heard a lock click when Kaoru grabbed the handle, and stared on in apprehension as a portion of the wall slid away to reveal another small room. Kaoru gestured him inside.
‘What… what the hell is this?!’
The first step he took into the room made him stumble a bit, and he looked down in confusion. Wall to wall, the floor was made up of a springy black material that sank slightly under his weight. There were no windows; the room was lit by an odd arrangement of small lights fixed along the outer edge of the ceiling, all twisted to point to the center. The far wall was one enormous mirror, the others were painted a deep shade of blue-violet that gave the space an almost surreal sort of feeling. Two heavy wooden posts stood in the center of the room, about two-and-a-half meters apart with sturdy steel hoops mounted up their lengths at regular intervals. More of the hoops also adorned the ceiling, the walls, and even the floor. Off to one side, a folded step ladder and a small stepping stool were tucked neatly under a table holding a camera, a collapsed tripod, and several meticulously-wound bundles of black rope.
Kaoru’s voice, unusually husky in his ear, sent a shiver down Kyo’s spine as he wondered, “Have you ever been tied up, my pet?”
Kyo felt his mind grind to a halt.
‘…Oh…’
‘Oh gods…’
‘Oh-’
-“Tied up.”-
-“Do you trust me?”-
-“Tied up.”-
‘-gods, oh gods, oh gods…’
“I… I ha-” His voice cracked then, just a bit, and a wild blush flared on his cheeks. “N-Not really? I… y-you mean, like… shibari?”
In the mirror, Kaoru’s mouth pulled into an amused smirk, his eyes near-black with anticipation. “Yes, like shibari.”
Words failed him. The handcuffs-to-the-headboard kind of thing he’d done, certainly, but what Kaoru had in mind was obviously so far removed from that kind of bondage that they could hardly even be considered related. Kyo had always been somewhat fascinated by the more elaborate forms of rope-play that he’d seen online, but he’d never been with anyone patient enough to indulge in the art, let alone anyone he trusted enough to be so completely and utterly vulnerable with.
He tried to swallow, and found his mouth had gone dry. “You… you want to…?”
“Oh yes. If you think you can handle it.”
There was a forced sort of consideration to Kaoru’s voice that caught Kyo’s attention and he turned slowly, putting his back to the foreboding room to face his master.
Kaoru leaned against the doorframe, looking just slightly frustrated now. “This is one thing I will never require or force you to do for me. Without your complete cooperation, I can’t do it properly, and I can’t enjoy myself. Before you decide, know that I won’t be angry if this is too much for you to accept right now, just disappointed. I will, however, be incredibly pissed if you agree to it now and try to bail out halfway through.”
Kyo bit his lip, looking back over his shoulder at the hooks in the wall.
He wanted to say “no.” He wanted to take advantage of the one real choice he’d been offered and opt out of this terrifyingly foreign situation. He wanted go back to the things he’d managed to come to understand; the relative comfort of his clean white cell and his daily routine and the simple touches and simple sex that had kept Kaoru happy thus far. The thought of being so thoroughly restrained, so undeniably helpless at the hands of his captor was deeply terrifying in a way that nothing else had ever been. And Kaoru had promised not to be mad if he refused!
-“I need you to do something for me, Kyo.”-
But…
‘He’s unhappy, now…’
‘I have to take care of Him…’
‘He needs me…’
He spoke softly, carefully. “This… this will make you happy?”
Kaoru nodded. “Very much so.”
“And, you won’t… you won’t hurt me?” Bondage was one thing, but sado-masochistic play was another game entirely; one that he knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that he couldn’t handle at this point.
“You’ll be fine if you behave. I don’t usually do anything too painful, but it can be somewhat uncomfortable, and putting up too much of a fuss in the ropes can hurt you.”
Kyo took a deep breath.
‘This is all about trust, isn’t it?’
‘He’s asked me to trust Him before…’
‘To bare my throat when He was holding a razor… He does it every night.’
‘That’s way scarier than this, right?’
‘He needs this.’
‘He needs me to do this for Him.'
Clenching his fists at his sides, Kyo looked up at his master with every last shred of resolution he could muster. “Just tell me what to do.”
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Miwaku no Zakuro