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Your Sins Into Me	By : Tcharlatan Category: > Kyo/Kaoru Views: 1394 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: Disclaimer: This is a work of pure fiction. I do not personally know any of the members of Dir en grey or Penicillin, and do not profit from this work.

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Kyo sat in his preparation room, smoking and staring at his reflection in the mirror critically. He’d done his hair and make-up differently tonight, much more subdued than usual, and he was trying to decide if he liked the effect. It was more natural, that was for sure, but was that better? He definitely thought the blue contacts had a cool effect with his bleached hair, always had. But was he attractive enough to forgo so much of his usual primping? He worried sometimes about looking too soft.
Eventually he shook his head, coming to the conclusion that he was just feeling self-conscious because he was wearing Toshiya’s clothing instead of his own. Denim shorts with frayed edges fit him like a second skin, leopard-print tights and tattered fishnets covered his legs down to the tops of his heavy boots. A collection of belts draped and crossed loosely over his hips. His ruffled, black shirt was open and sleeveless, but a careful selection of bracelets climbed his forearms, jingling every time he moved. He felt simultaneously naked and over-dressed, which he supposed was the look Toshiya had been going for.
Shifting his thoughts past his appearance, he smiled into the mirror, feeling a little thrill of anticipation for the show he had planned. He had so little to give Kaoru in return for his affection and generosity, since his possessions were still firmly in Hakuei’s custody, and it wasn’t like he had anything Kaoru would want. He could only clean so much, and Kaoru never seemed all that interested in food, no matter what he made. But after the week he’d just had – exploring a new and exciting relationship with the man, being cherished so openly and so reverently, like he was precious – he felt he had to do something for him.
It had occurred to him on Wednesday night, what he had to give. Kaoru liked to hear him sing, and tonight… tonight, he planned to pour every last drop of himself into his show for the man, his physical limitations be damned. If he was mute for life by the end of this set, he would at least know that he had given everything he had for the man he was quickly coming to care so deeply for. He glanced at the clock and stubbed out his cigarette, moving eagerly down the hall. When at last he took to the darkened stage, plucking his microphone out of its stand deftly, eyes turned pale blue sought and found the now-familiar intense gaze under the red glow of the bar lights. Kaoru’s lips curved into smile over the edge of his beer glass, and Kyo felt his heart skip a beat. He spared a glance at Toshiya – seated next to Kaoru at the bar, engrossed in a conversation with Die – and Shinya – pausing in his duties just long enough to wave to him – before bowing his head in preparation.
A slow piano tune started trickling out of the speakers, and the bar quieted a bit in anticipation. Guitars and drums rushed in suddenly, building up then fading back like the tides, and the lights swept over the slender figure alone on the stage as a low voice, soft and sweet, rolled out over the room.
“I… I came here by day… but I left here in darkness and found you… found you on the way. Now… it is silver and silent… it is silver and cold. You in somber resplendence,” Kyo threw back his head, unleashing the full power of his voice, “I hold!”
The lights flared and the music swelled, washing over the room and imbuing the surging crowd with energy, Kyo shaking his head with a pained grimace as he cried out, “Your sins into me, oh my beautiful one, your sins into me! As a rapturous voice escapes, I will tremble a prayer, and I’ll beg for forgiveness. Your sins into me, oh my beautiful one.”
~*~
Toshiya had never known – couldn’t possibly have imagined – what he was getting himself into when he asked to join Kaoru and Kyo going to the club. For the past two weeks that he’d known Kyo, he’d been thinking of him as a soft, frail little human with a quiet laugh and big, bright eyes, who had once been abused by his lover. Even after the man had stopped taking his debilitating pain killers and a more boisterous laugh and a slightly obscure sense of humor began to surface, he’d forgotten what Kaoru had told him of Kyo’s shows. He had focused instead on the simple sweetness he saw when the blonde was in the company of his doting roommate as they explored their new relationship.
But now… now he saw that sweet face twist into a ferocious mask of passion and strength. That smooth voice, so gentle at home, now screamed and shrieked and howled songs that painted beautiful thoughts with ugly words and disgusting ideas with artful prose. The man filled the stage, the building, with the intensity of his emotion and the power of his presence.
Not only that, but the way he was moving! Toshiya had worried at first that the outfit he’d chosen for the blonde was too blatantly revealing, incongruous with what he’d thought of a shy, introverted personality. Now he knew that it didn’t really matter what the man was wearing because, on stage – with his hips twisting and his belly undulating hypnotically and his tongue coming out to trace ever-so-temptingly over his upper lip – Kyo absolutely oozed sensuality.
Though if Toshiya had been blind and deaf, he still would have been blown away by Kyo’s performance. The energy he was releasing came in a low trickle that surged whenever songs would reach high points, but it never achieved the full flooding force that came from physical climax. It was thick and heady, saccharine with an underlying heat that again made Toshiya think of nothing more than honeyed ginger, and it was absolutely addictive.
“K-Kaoru…” Toshiya’s voice was shaking. “Kao, how… can you stand this?”
He never, never should have opened himself the way he had. He’d consumed as much of the spicy-sweet power as he could, eagerly lapping up every last trace as it was released. It was like an hour and a half of foreplay and he found himself going mad with want for more. Even when he’d eaten his fill, he found he couldn’t stop absorbing it, his body was so used to following the slow stream of building pleasure to the raging torrent unleashed by orgasm. He felt at once bloated and starved, filled to the brim but still craving the rush of full release.
“Kaoru, I… I need help, I think… I think I’m losing it!”
Kaoru looked a bit drunk, with glazed eyes and flushed cheeks. Kyo had spent much of the show staring at him, and in those moments it was like they were alone and the blonde was singing just for him. It was enthralling. Hearing the strain in his younger friend’s voice, he forced himself to look away from the figure on stage. He was startled to find Toshiya’s face had gone sickly pale, the irises of his eyes spreading dangerously and beginning to take on a blue tinge. The fingers that reached out to grip his arm were becoming too long, and the nails were becoming sharp and black.
“Shit, Totchi, are you okay? Hey, come on, get a hold of yourself,” Kaoru whispered furtively, putting an arm around his roommate’s thin shoulders. If Toshiya lost control of himself here, there was no way he could Sway everyone in the club to forget what they saw.
“I can’t, Kao, I… I feel so… nnnh!” Toshiya whined anxiously.
“Hey, are you doing alright?” Die, ever vigilant, had seen the strained hunch of Toshiya’s shoulders and moved over to check on them. “Is he sick?”
“He’s okay; I think he just needs some fresh air,” Kaoru assured the redhead.
“There.” Die pointed to a half-obscured doorway off to one side of the stage. “Go straight through that hallway, the door at the end goes out into a secured ally. This should be Kyo’s last song, and he always goes out there to smoke when he’s done. You can meet up with him there.”
“Thanks, Die,” Kaoru called over his shoulder as he ushered Toshiya through the crowded room toward the door.
In the alley, Toshiya fell to his hands and knees panting as he strove to regain control. He cried out in pain as his bones shifted back and forth restlessly between his human disguise and his true form. A sinuous tail came out, lashed once, then shrank back in. Black horns sprouted and spiraled elegantly at the side of his head, then disappeared into soft black hair. Ears lengthened, sprouting a velvet layer of silver grey fur and curling into long, soft tubes pressed back against his skull in distress, then dwindled back into shallow shells.
Kaoru knelt next to his friend, one hand on the man’s long back as he watched the endless shifting. “Come on, Toshiya… come on, you have to block it now, you’ve had enough. You’re going to make yourself sick.”
Toshiya whimpered, panic clutching at his chest. “I can’t… I can’t let it go! I can’t… please help me, Kao, you have to help me, I can’t-”
“Shhh, breathe Totchi, breathe. It’s okay, I’m here, you’ll be okay,” Kaoru murmured. “Breathe… in and out, with me, come on now.”
With brick walls and distance between himself and the source of that maddening trickle, Toshiya squeezed his eyes shut and focused on Kaoru’s low, soothing voice. With effort, he forced himself to fall into unison with his roommate’s slow, even breathing and settled his frantic mind enough to lower his mental defenses. He felt a presence so much older and more powerful than his own come between him and Kyo, cutting off the stream he’d been feeding on, and gasped with pained relief. As his body slowly settled into its human form, he sat back against the brick wall, panting. He still felt sick and overstuffed, but the pressing need for more wasn’t straining at him anymore.
“Okay?” Kaoru asked, his voice heavy with concern as he pulled back out of his younger friend’s mind.
“Yeah… thanks, Kaoru, I… I don’t think I could have stopped it on my own,” Toshiya admitted. He accepted the hand extended to him and stood a bit shakily, dusting himself off. “I was just waiting for… I wanted…”
“The big finish?” Kaoru asked with a knowing half-smile.
“Yeah… you feel it too, then?”
“Every damn time.”
“How did you do this every week?”
Kaoru rubbed the back of his head abashedly. “I usually get pretty drunk when I come here.”
Toshiya chuckled, rubbing one hand over his face tiredly. “You just didn’t need to this time ‘cause you’ve had him all to yourself all week.”
Kaoru grinned a little indulgently. He had been somewhat gluttonous since he and Kyo first kissed the previous Friday. They still hadn’t gone past kissing and heavy petting; he worried about rushing the younger man so close on the heels of a bad relationship, and so he waited for the blonde to make the next move. Kyo didn’t seem to mind letting things slow down a little after coming together so abruptly, but he did frequently entertain fantasies about his new boyfriend that Kaoru couldn’t help but bring to life when the blonde slept. The wet dreams he spun for his mortal treasure were wild and wonderful things that left Kyo sticky and slick with sweat and other messes, and – though he was careful not to overfeed like before – had Kaoru veritably glowing with regained health.
Toshiya ran a hand through his hair, heaving a relieved sigh. “Fuck, that was lucky, huh? I was worried Kyo was going to walk out while I was still, you know… freaking out.”
Kaoru laughed a little, “Yeah, me too. He should be out soon though, I think. I can’t hear him singing anymore, can you?”
“No, actually. Now that you mention it, I haven’t heard him for a while now…”

The song above (Silver and Cold) is intellectual property of AFI, and I do not own any rights to it or profit from its use.
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Your Sins Into Me