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The Babysitter	By : redqueeninwonderland Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > Green Day Views: 12260 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know the members of Green Day. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 22
- 23
Title: The
Babysitter Chapter 20
Rating: R
Disclaimer: I don�t
own them. Never did own them. And anybody who says I did is lying. Cept for Ava, Tom and Cara. Those are mine. Oh, whilst I�m
thinking about it, the first song, Damn
is a kickass Leann Rhimes song
of her Twisted Angel album, 4 into 3 is by Cheri Lovedog
and is off the Prey for Rock �n Roll soundtrack, and this last one is by Emiliana Torrinni.
Notes: Okay guys,
this is a Christmas bonus because I wasn�t planning on this chapter getting
done as fast as all this. I hope you enjoy.

@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@%@

Ava was sitting
propped in her bed, a pillow shoved under her knee and a smaller one under her
ankle. Cara spent the night over at Matt�s, so she�d had the bed to herself. It
was a luxury to be able to stretch out like that, but it was weird too. After
who knew how many weeks having to maneuver around the bed-hog, it was strange
to have a king sized pillow mattress all to herself.
Just now, she was leaning against the
headboard, her guitar slung over her lap. It was a weird position to be in, but
frankly, she�d been writing all morning and this was the only instrument she
played where she didn�t have to be sitting up. Or have something shoved against
her side. She wondered for the umpteenth time why she�d ever let her father
talk her into bagpipe lessons as a twelve year old.
Either way, the song she was working on was
good. She knew it was good. But it was still strange to be writing it. Ava spent the better part of the night before thinking
about what she was going to say to Billie. See, he hadn�t come by the day after
the media circus like he�d said. Tom said likely because Jane was telling him
to lay low. And here it was day two and she wasn�t sure whether he�d chance
coming by today either.
So far there wasn�t anything to unsavory in the news. Ava�d been Googling Billie�s name
like a fiend and there wasn�t anything damaging. Or at least nothing close to
the truth that sounded plausible. She figured it made since him going crazy in
a crowded emergency room, what with her giving birth to Elvis� stillborn alien
twins. Ava would freak out under circumstances like
that too.
She took a sip of the water on the night
table and her fingers went back to the strings. One last time and then she
would set the guitar aside and take a nap. In about an hour, Tom would be up
with another Vicodin. And then she�d be useless until
that wore off.
�Once
in a house on a hill/A boy got angry/He broke into my heart/For
a day and a night/I stayed beside him/Until I had no hope.� She didn�t look
up from her fingers on the frets. She knew the door had opened, that he�d come
in. But she wasn�t ready to acknowledge. �So
I came down the hill/Of course I was hurt/But then I
started to think/It shouldn't hurt me to be free/It's what I really need.�
Billie watched Ava
sing. Her voice was like he remembered. Strong, but soft.
Thick like molasses. But crystalline, spun sugar
candy. He leaned against the door frame and just watched her. His phone had
been ringing off the hook for the past twenty-four hours. He, Mike, Tre, and Jane had had an extended pow-wow.
Adrienne called, wanting to know how Ava was doing.
If she suspected anything she never said a word. He�d been tempted to just
fucking tell her.
It would be nice to just come clean with
it. This is my girlfriend, what�re you gonna do about
it? And not just Adrienne, everybody. Who the fuck
cared anyway? But they would care. And words like statutory rape and
age-of-consent did merry little dances in his head. He tried to justify it, whatisname in the Stones dated one of his wives when she
was fourteen and he was fifty-something. Then there was Jerry Lee Lewis and his
fourteen year old wife. But then, that was between family
so he couldn�t really judge there.
Either way, it had never been about age.
Not to them. Not really.
�To
pull myself together/But if it's so good being free/Would you mind telling me/Why
I don't know what to do with myself/There's a bar by the dock/Where I found myself/Drinking
with this man/He offered me a cigarette/And I accepted/'Cause it's been a very
long time/As it burned/'till the end/I thought of the boy/No one could ever
forget,� Ava was fighting to keep ignoring him. Wanting
to look up, to see him, to see what he saw when he looked at her. To understand. To find her strength again.
�It shouldn't hurt me to be free/It's
what I really need/To pull myself together/But if it's so good being free/Would
you mind telling me/Why I don't know what to do with myself.�
Her hand covered the strings. Her fingers
caressed the pick guard once, lovingly before she looked up at him. And it was
just like she remembered. And he hadn�t changed a bit from the other day to
now. And it hurt and made her feel good all at the same time.
�Hey, you,� he murmured, his voice holding
question. She split her lip in the accident. There was a line of scab running
across the lower left side of her mouth and if he didn�t know any better he�d
swear it was a slender lip ring. He wished that was all it was.
�You�re late,� Ava
didn�t attempt to move either leg, but she inclined her head. When he stepped
closer to the bed she shifted, making a face. Finally she handed him the
guitar. He smiled, briefly, before sitting at the foot of the bed, his back to
one of the wrought iron posts. Unconsciously his fingers started plucking a
melody.
�Yeah, uhm��
�Press, the kids, all
that kind of stuff, huh?�
�Yeah,� he cocked his head, �How you
feeling?�
�Like I get hit by a car,� she shrugged,
taking another sip of the water. �It could have been a lot worse.�
�Has Jake-�
�He�s called three times in the last two
days. I didn�t realize��
�He wants to marry you, kid.� Billie
grinned at that and Ava blushed, but her look got
more intent. Then he blushed, his ears burning he set the guitar aside, on the
other side of the bed. �I should have called.�
�It�s okay, you were busy.�
�No, I mean�after everything, I should have
called.�
Ava nodded once,
looking off to the right at a Chia head on the
dresser. �Yeah, you should have called.�
His eyes trailed to where she was looking,
�I don�t know why I�where the hell did that come from?�
�From Tre,
actually, he said I should start sampling different kinds of grass. Not sure
what he meant, but-�
�Don�t worry about it, half the time we
don�t get it either.�
�Liar.�
�It sounded good,� he laughed with her and
then put his hand on her bare foot. �How are you really?�
�Truth?�
�Always.�
�I feel like shit. I wake up in the middle
of the night and I can�t breathe right because I�m on my side and my ribs hurt.
Or I move wrong and my knee feels like it�s on fire. And I can�t answer the
freaking phone because dad�s afraid it�ll be reporters.�
�I�m sorry about that.�
�It�ll die down in a week or so.� She
shrugged, ever the publicist�s daughter. �Another circus and
all that. Why do you care, Billie?�
�Don�t do that, Ava.�
�No, I�m serious. It�s not like it was your
fault.� There was an awkward silence. She watched the emotions flit across his
face and wanted to reach out and smooth the lines away. But at the same time,
she couldn�t help the tiny part of her that wanted him to hurt.
�It was, though,� he sighed, tired. So tired,
�If I could take it all back, I would Ava.�
�Everything?� She
bit her lip, wondering where was the strong Ava who
just wanted to make him cry. Make him beg. Why was she only around when Ava was in a particularly bitchy mood.
Why didn�t that girl stick around to see what happened when Ava
actually said the things that flashed through her mind?
He reached out, leaning forward, his
fingers tracing the line of her cheek. �No, not everything.
You know that.� She closed her eyes against the touch and he wondered if it was
because she didn�t care any longer or because she still did. �Sometimes all I
want is to just go to some store together and hold hands in public.�
Ava�s closed lids
tightened and she felt the tears. �I�m going to Berkeley,� the words just sort of fell out of her
mouth. Like an afterthought. Like something flung into the ether to ward off
the bittersweet.
�California?� He straightened, confused.
�No� The school of
music.� She opened her eyes, �I�ve been accepted. They�re offering me a
full scholarship.�
�That�s in� like��
�Boston.� She waited for his answer.
He nodded once, taking in the information.
�Oh.� Billie rose, turning away from her and taking a step away from the bed.
His hand curled around the bed post and he just stood. Breathing.
Ava waited. Trying to be patient.
�When?�
She jumped, then
found her voice, �The fall semester. I�m hoping I�ll be off crutches and stuff
by then. It just� it was the right time.�
He closed his eyes, pinching the bridge of
his nose and forcing himself to breathe. Torn between anger that he finally
figures out exactly what he wants and then gets it ripped away and excitement
for her. Or rather, he was trying to muster the excitement for her, he wasn�t
torn. He was pretty much all in resentment at this point. �It�s a great
opportunity,� he said finally.
�Please don�t be mad, Billie,� Ava wanted nothing more than to draw her knees to her chest
and bury her head in her arms and hide. But she couldn�t, it hurt to damn much
to move. And she also hated it that she was dropping this bomb and she was
pretty much immobile on the bed so she was royally screwed if he decided to
just walk out.
He laughed, couldn�t stop himself. She
sounded so plaintive. So� lost. Billie forced himself
to turn around. But that was a mistake because then there were those eyes
staring at him with the tears in them, wide like deer in the headlights and at
the same time so intelligent. He sighed, �It�s a great opportunity, kid. I�m
happy for you.� Apparently happy now felt like he�d been chewing saw dust and
washing it down with paint thinner.
�I�m sorry,� she spread her arms and he
laughed again, �It�s just-� her face screwed up and
she knew she was going to cry and
that made it worse. The final injustice that somehow, even
with this she couldn�t just say it
and be done. She had to be all kinds of emotional.
�Ava, don�t,� he
was across the short space and sitting at the edge of the bed, taking her face
between his hands, trying for the life of him to hide his disappointment.
�Don�t, baby, I�m happy for you, really.�
�Then why-�
�Because I don�t want to lose you, you
know?� He wiped her eyes with this thumbs, forcing himself to ignore the angry
bruises and scrapes. There was a long bloody scrape just under her eye that
looked like it could have taken that eye out if it�d been any higher. �I mean,
I was all set to come over here and tell you as soon as you were eighteen we
were comin� out and now-�
�We couldn�t have done that anyway,
Billie.� She murmured softly, her eyes sad.
�Why not? Because of Adrienne and the kids? We�d figure out a way�S�okay, you know? We can do the long distance thing-�
�No, we can�t, Billie.�
He sat back, disbelief on his face.
�At least, not now.�
She laughed, softly, ironically. Ava reached up and
wiped her nose, �I did a lot of thinking yesterday while I was waiting for
you.�
�I told you-�
She held up a hand, �I know, you couldn�t
call. It wasn�t about that. Honestly, Billie. It�s just� everything. It�s my
age, it�s school, it�s dad, it�s mom� when we broke
up,� here her voice cracked and she rolled her eyes self deprecatingly, �I was
pretty tore up. And I blamed you. Because you didn�t
understand me. And I couldn�t figure out why you didn�t love me enough
to get it and then I got it. It
wasn�t about you. It wasn�t ever about how you felt about me.�
�Baby-�
�Billie,� she nodded at a framed picture on
the bedside table, �I know you love
me.�
�You know Joe�s already planning next
year�s party, right? He wants a G.I. Joe theme now.� They stared at the picture
together for a beat. Then two. Then he sighed, �Is
this the �it�s not you it�s me�, speech?�
She arched an eyebrow, �I hadn�t thought
about it like that, but yeah. I don�t want to make this trite, but it�s true
you know. Cara made me realize-�
�She called me, you know?�
�Cara?� Ava
cocked her head, �When?�
�That day we fought. She said you�d just
broken some movies or something, whatever the hell that means, and then she
yelled at me for a good thirty minutes. Told me to figure out exactly what I
wanted or go be emo.�
�You�re joking.�
�No, I�m not.� He nudged her leg, �But she
was right. And I realized�that�s why I wanted to get up with you only your dad
said you were in fucking Japan and then you weren�t, but Jake was going
ape-shit and then there was the car, and now-�
�Billie, I�m sorry!� Ava
spread her arms and damned again the powers that be that she couldn�t pace the
room. �It�s just that I can�t be with you until I know I�m good for you and I
can�t be good for you until I have something. Right now it�s punk rocker and
his jail-bait girlfriend. It�s never going to be anything else until I do something. On my
own. Something that�s mine!�
�I can help you with your music, Ava!� He was a little desperate now and he didn�t like how
it sounded on him.
�But then it�d be you helping me! Don�t you
get it? I have to do this!� Ava�s eyes begged him to get it. To not
be stupid about it.
He held her gaze for a beat, then two. Then
finally, �So what happens until then?�
She shrugged, �I don�t know. But I can�t
keep seeing you like this. Not when I can�t� it�s just to
hard.�
He nodded, �Tell me about it. I�ll wait for
you.�
Ava laughed, eyes
widening to hold back the tears. She tossed her shorn hair. �No
you won�t,� she was trying like hell to sound more cavalier than she
felt. �You�ll mope for a few weeks and then you�ll be dating some model.�
�Oh yeah?� He
climbed over her on the bed, careful of her legs and the guitar. Then he leaned
against the headboard himself, easing her into his arms. �Doesn�t mean four
years down the road I won�t remember. You�ll be coming donw
the red carpet in this kick ass dress about to accept your first grammy and then,� he kissed her hairline, his lips warm and
she closed her eyes to savor it. �My heart�ll stop.
All over again, just like when you rang that damn doorbell.� His fingers
trailed over her arm, �You were an obnoxious brat.�
�Yeah� only it won�t happen that way. In
five years you won�t even remember me. I�ll be that girl that you were with
while you were divorcing Adrienne.�
�Evie?�
�I won�t have a name. You�ll see me and
nudge somebody and go �hey, who�s that girl I think I know her� and that�ll be
it.� Her voice trembled, giving voice to her fear and making it sound like they
were just daydreaming.
�One day, years from now, Jake�ll ask me whatever happened to you and we�ll fight to
remember who you were.�
�Yeah� I�ll be that girl, you know�whatshername. She had the funky hair.�
�Hey,� he curled a finger under her chin to
lift her up to look at him. �I love this hair,� he ruffled it to make a point
before bending his head to kiss her. When the kiss ended she was crying in
earnest and he curled her closer to his body. �The song was beautiful.� He
punctuated it with a kiss, �And I do understand.�
She laughed. �I�ve spent the past few
months writing you all kinds of stuff.�
�Yeah?�
�Yeah,� she lifted her head. �Write me a
song?�
He grinned, �Maybe.�
�Billie-!�
�Hey, since when is it
tit for tat?� He shrugged, laughing, �Besides, I cannot gauruntee that I will be inspired to write�� At the look on
her face he stopped, they were laughing sure, but her eyes� He kissed her nose.
Her eye lids. Her forehead. Memorizing the feel of her against his lips. �I�ll write you
an album.�
�I�ll never forget you,� she whispered, her
lips against his shirt. He closed his eyes, knowing whether he liked it or not
it was goodbye.
�I love you, kid.�

Finis
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The Babysitter