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Without You I'm Nothing (Chapter 39 up now!)	By : urbanephoenix Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > Placebo Views: 5829 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is purely a work of fiction! I do not know any members of Placebo or their families, and I do not profit from these writings.

Chapter List
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Thanks for comments =) It really makes me happy that people seem to like my OCs.
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BRIAN.

It was the last day before the two week break, and a half day at that, for which Brian was eternally grateful. He and Stef were doing their music assessment in second period, which gave the black haired boy plenty of time to panic beforehand.

“Hey.” He smiled nervously as Stef sat next to him in maths.

“Hi, I um... I talked to Courtney. We’ve sorted it out and-“

“ That’s great!” Brian interrupted. “You had me worried for a moment.”

Stef shuffled nervously. “Um, Brian?”

“Shh we can talk later!” Brian was overjoyed. Of course, he’d assumed the worst, it’d kept him up all night. But knowing it was sorted, he could finally relax.

***

The music assessment came and went without a hitch, Brian had to owe it to Stef for getting them to perform on Wednesday evening. He wasn’t sure the assessors really understood their act but they’d done it, it’d gone well, and there was only recess and one more class until two weeks of sleeping in, no homework and lounging around Stefan’s place eating chips.

“So, is it ok if I come over tonight then?” Brian asked as the pair made their way outside at the bell. “I mean I’ll have to go home and get some stuff after school but I figure the sooner I’m out of my parents’ place the better.” He laughed, biting into his apple.

Stef frowned. “Um, you still want to stay?”

“Sure why not?” the black haired boy shrugged. “Oooh you mean Courtney? Hmm that’s ok I guess, there’s plenty of room, he can have your brothers’ yeah? Unless it’d be weird for him...”

“Brian, I think you’ve misunderstood.”

The colour from Brian’s face drained as he looked up at his friend. “What?” he asked nervously.

“I told you I’d sorted things out with Courtney... Well, we kinda decided to try... you know... being together.”

“What?! But... Stef he’s going back to America in two weeks! It’ll just start all over again!” the smaller boy protested. Why was this happening again? Couldn’t Stefan see what would happen?

“No, it won’t! He won’t be gone forever and I really like him.” The blonde replied softly.

“Jesus.” Brian stopped behind the main building out of earshot of their fellow students. “And you don’t like me?”

“Oh come on, you know I do!”

“So, what about everything that happened with us? Are we just supposed to put everything on hold when your scientist comes running back?”

Stef scowled. “No, I want to be with him. For real.”

A tear ran down Brian’s cheek, no, he wouldn’t give the blonde that satisfaction. “Ok Stefan. If that’s what you want. But know this, if you don’t want me now, that’s it. There are no second chances, or whatever chance we’re up to now. We can be friends, but we can’t be together. Ever.”

STEFAN.

Why couldn’t he just have a nice uncomplicated relationship? Stef rubbed his temple, contemplating Brian’s words. “Fine, that’s fine.” It wasn’t, and he knew it. He was effectively signing away any chance of being with the smaller boy again, and quite possibly their friendship. He only hoped it was worth it.

***

Stef arrived home to hear ringing. Fumbling with his keys he ran to the back of the house looking for the phone.

“Hello?” he heard a muffled voice. “Yes that’s right, ah! He’s just got home, I’ll hand you over.” Courtney smiled and passed him the phone. “Your boss.”

Oh no, was he supposed to work that afternoon? “Hi, Randy.”

“Stefan, my boy, how are you?” his manager’s cheery voice answered.

“I’m good thanks, what can I do for you?”

Randy cleared his throat. “Well, I was wondering if you and your little friend wanted another show?”

Stef was shocked, unsure how to react to such a question. “Um, excuse me?”

“My nephew’s band, Hanlon Riots need an opener tomorrow night at Fowlers, the singer of the last mob is sick or got arrested or something.”

“Wow, that’s... thanks for thinking of us but I dunno. We don’t have a drummer and last time was just a once off.”

There was a pause on the end of the line until Stef heard two muffled voices. “Tell you what,” Randy said to him. “my nephew Ianto will lend you a drum machine, he says he’ll even drop it round and tell you how to use it. And we’ll certainly make it worth your while. C’mon Stef, do us a favour?”

Stefan sighed, it certainly was a great opportunity, but he couldn’t help but think he was the last person Brian would want to see. “I’ll ask Brian, I’ll call you back in ten.”

“Cheers, Stef.”

Hanging up the phone the blonde collapsed his head in his hands. He wanted to do this, more than anything, and he definitely didn’t want to let down his boss.
“What’s wrong?” Courtney asked, appearing in the doorway.

“My boss wants me and Brian to play another show, tomorrow night.” He explained, not looking up.

“That’s great!” The red head grinned. “I’m so proud of you!”

Stef felt two strong arms grip him in a tight hug but it didn’t reassure him. “I don’t think Brian will want to do it. He’s a bit upset with me.”

“There’s only one way to find out.”

BRIAN.

He hadn’t enjoyed telling his parents he’d be spending the entire holidays at home, but what else was he going to do? Brian lay on his bed flipping through pages of music he’d written. ‘All rubbish,’ he thought to himself. He jumped in surprise as he heard the phone ringing next to him.

“Yeah?” he answered. Usually he would have sounded more friendly, but he was hardly in the mood.

“Brian?” he heard Stef’s voice on the end of the line. Fan-fucking-tastic.

“What do you want?” he asked grumpily.

“My boss wants us to play another show for his nephew’s band. Tomorrow night at Fowlers, I don’t know what that is but-“

Brian bolted up. “Did you say Fowlers?”

“Yeah what is it?” Stef asked, sounding confused.

“It’s a venue just south of the city, gees, that’s kind of a big deal. I mean, it’s not huge but, wow.” He started running his fingers through his long black hair, deep in thought. This wasn’t really an opportunity they could pass up. “Do you want to?
”
“Yes, I really do.” The blonde replied quickly. “Can we just, pretend we like each other again? For tomorrow night at least?”

Brian frowned. “You don’t like me?”

“Of course I do, I thought-“

“God I hate talking on the phone. Can I come over? Tell your boss we’ll do it.” The black haired boy held the phone between his shoulder and ear, trying to pull his shoes on.

“Yeah, great! Come over whenever you like. Thanks Bri.”

Brian smiled. “I’ll be right over.”

STEFAN.

That had been far less painful than he’d expected, he just hoped they’d be able to work out this drum machine thing by tomorrow evening. Fifteen minutes after hanging up the phone, Brian was standing in his kitchen while the blonde made tea.

“Where’s Courtney?”

Stef shrugged. “He went out.” ‘Only because I begged him’, he thought to himself. But Brian didn’t need to know that.

There was a knock at the door and Stefan rushed to answered it. “That’ll be Randy’s nephew.”

Opening the door he was greeted by a tall, black-haired, 20-something carrying a large box. He’d met him only two days ago, but Wednesday night had been such a blur Stef hardly remembered. “Hi, come in.” He led the young man through the house, back to the kitchen. “Brian this is... uh sorry, what was your name?”

“Ianto, nice to meet you, whoa you’re a guy? Serious mind fuck!” The young man replied in a thick Welsh accent, laughing and holding a hand out to Brian. “And here, is one Roland TR-909.” He held out the box to Stef, who didn’t know what to make of it. “Great drum machine.”

“Uuh you might have to show us how to use it,” the blonde said, opening it. “I’ve never seen a drum machine before, and I’m pretty useless with this stuff.”

“You can teach me!” Brian interjected excitedly. “I mean, how hard can it be?”

Ianto smiled, flicking his long hair out of his face. “Shall we?”

The duo followed him into the lounge room, Stef glancing a look down at Brian who had a cheeky smirk spread across his face. He’d seen that before. “Don’t even think about it.” He hissed.

The black haired boy looked up. “He’s gorgeous, isn’t he? How could I not remember someone... like him.”

“Hey, snap out of it. He’s teaching us to use a drum thingy, not here for your entertainment.”

Brian shrugged. “I don’t see why it can’t be both.”

BRIAN.

It took the trio the rest of the day, but by the time the sun had set Stef and Brian had successfully programmed eight drum tracks into the drum machine.

“We are going to look like such idiots,” Stef groaned. “who still uses drum machines in the 90s?”

Ianto smiled. “You’d be surprised. Oh, do you guys need guitars? My uncle reckons you were using acoustics last time.”

“You want to lend us electric guitars?” Brian asked excitedly. “Really!?”

“Sure, I’ll just run out to my car.” The Welshman laughed.

Brian looked to Stefan, unable to wipe the grin from his face. “Stef, this is actually happening! Drums and electric guitars, shit!”

“Calm down, we only have one guitar part. This is all getting pretty complica-“

“Oh calm down, it’ll be fine. We have a day to rehearse.” Brian could tell the blonde was nervous, he probably should have been too.

“Voila!” Ianto reappeared in the room, two guitars in hand. “Sorry I don’t have amps you can borrow tonight, but you can use ours tomorrow.” He said, passing a bass to Stefan.

“I can’t play this.”

“How hard can it be, Stef?” Brian asked, plucking the strings on the Stratocaster he’d been handed. “You have two less strings to worry about.”

“Brian, we have to play in front of people. TOMORROW! I’ve never even held a bass before!” the younger boy complained.

“I’ll help,” Ianto offered. “at least write some bass lines and you can perfect them later.”

***

It was dark by the time they had perfected guitar parts. Brian had secretly hoped it’d take longer, anything to get their new friend to stay.

“Want to stay for dinner?” he asked, hopefully. “It’s the least we could do after all you’ve done for us today.”

“Why is that?” Stef thought aloud. “I mean, you must know heaps of bands, why do you want us?”

Ianto shrugged. “You guys are somethin’ different. I like that.” He stood up and put on his coat. “I gotta run, but we’ll have a drink tomorrow after the show.”

Leading the Welshman out another body barged through the door. “Fuck it’s cold!” Courtney grumbled. “Sorry Stef, but I can’t stay out all night.”

The trio stood silent, apparently invisible to the red head.

“Ooh, mybad sorry. Aren’t you guys popular!” he laughed looking the stranger up and down.

“See you guys tomorrow.” Ianto smiled as he left, jumping into a beaten up Toyota.

“Fuck I’m tired.” Stef sighed deeply closing the door. “I need a drink or sleep or... something.”

“He’s a bit alright, isn’t he?” Courtney grinned, following the blonde into the living room. “Your new friend I mean. He kinda looks like Brian only tall and with longer hair.”

“I’m standing right here!” Brian pouted. He’d had a good day, the last person he really wanted to be around was Courtney. “Look, I’m going to go, can we practice tomorrow morning?”

“Yeah, whatever.” Stef replied, hardly paying attention.

STEFAN.

They’d practiced for almost two days straight, but come seven pm Saturday, Stef still felt they weren’t ready. So much could go wrong. What if they’d made a mistake with the drum machine? What if he forgot his bass part (after all, he’d never played the stupid thing before yesterday and they hadn’t even practiced with their guitars plugged in!)? What if Brian forgot his persona and blew it half way. That could be awkward.

He watched his friend get ready for their set, pulling on the skirt he’d worn to his first day at St. Winstons. Why Brian still felt the need to be Briana was beyond him, but Stef didn’t bother fighting it. Instead, he focused on adjusting the wig Brian had ‘borrowed’ from his work for the blonde to wear. He had to give him credit, short and brown certainly suited him.

The Fowlers backstage area was a nice change from Randy’s bathroom a few nights ago, it almost made Stef feel important. The venue was filling up and through a crack in the door the blonde could see a few familiar faces. Courtney, Ianto with the rest of his band, some kids from school. Great, just what they needed.

The lights went down and, taking a deep breath, Stef grabbed his bass and headed on stage. The reception they received was far more enthusiastic than last time and the blonde couldn’t help but smile. He and Brian had decided on a few things before the show. Firstly, Stef would do all the talking and secondly, they’d settled on a temporary name. “Hi, um, we’re Cygnet Committee, thanks for coming early to see us.”

Queuing up the drum machine, Stef held his breath, hoping it would work. Much to his relief, a loud, constant beat started pounding out of the speakers. They hadn’t thought up a name for the song yet but it was a good way to start, long intro, giving them the chance to gage what kind of audience they had.

Much to Stefan’s surprise, people seemed to like it, even more so when Brian started to sing the opening lines. How anybody could seriously mistake him for a girl was beyond him.

The entire set was a blur, Stef was just happy they got through it with only a few minor slip ups. He couldn’t help but laugh at Brian, flirting with half the audience. What a showman.

“You know, there’ll be riots in the streets when they find out who you are.” He laughed as they walked off stage to a roaring applause.

BRIAN.

Brian was glowing, he got such a buzz from being on stage and those guys LOVED him. Well, loved Briana. He was getting used to the audience assuming he was a girl and really, it didn’t bother him.

He hadn’t been paying attention to Hanlon Riots the last time they played, but the black haired boy made a point of seeing them this time. Decked out in what could only be described as a sequined bodysuit, Ianto burst onto stage, his long hair blustering around his slim face. “What’s up FOWLERS!?” he screamed into the microphone as his band mates took their places behind him. The crowd roared approvingly. “We are Hanlon Riots and it is our pleasure to be with you tonight.”

Brian smiled, Ianto had obviously had a lot of practice working the audience, no doubt partially with his Welsh charm.

“We would like to dedicate this show to our good friends from Cygnet Committee. Hit it!”

It was an incredible show, Randy’s music store didn’t do them justice. On the big stage, the entire band made the most of the room, egging the eager punters to join them.

By the end, Brian felt more alive than ever, he ran backstage to get changed, not wanting to miss a chance to talk to the guys once they got off stage. Cringing as he pushed past Courtney and Stef sucking each other’s faces off, Brian headed for the bar. He could have spotted Ianto from a mile off, the tall singer certainly wasn’t one to blend in. “Hey, Brian!” he called out. “Come meet the lads.”

He walked over proudly where all the members of Hanlon Riots were standing, some well and truly off their faces.

“Brett, Mitch, Andrew, Pete, this is Brian.” Ianto smiled. They were clearly confused, having believed, as the audience did, that Brian was actually Briana.

“You’re a dude? Shit...” Mitch sighed somewhat disappointed.

“Sorry to disappoint.” The black haired boy smiled.

***

By midnight the band had disbursed, leaving only Ianto and Brian sitting by the bar with a few stragglers scattered around the venue.

“You know,” Ianto smirked, taking a sip of his fifth, or was it sixth, beer. “don’t take this the wrong way, but I was a bit bummed to find out you were a dude.”

“Why’s that?” he laughed.

“Well I had fully intended to crack onto you, guess that’s off the books now.”

Brian couldn’t help but be disappointed, but then, he couldn’t expect every gorgeous boy who came his way to swing that way.

“That makes two of us.”

Ianto shot him a suspicious look. “You’re not very subtle, you know.”

Brian smiled. “I don’t try to be. Gender is pretty overrated, in the end, we’re all pretty similar.”

“Oh god you’re drunk.” the Welshman laughed.

“Doesn’t make it any less true. If you ever change your mind, you know where to find me.”

“Y... you’re serious, aren’t you?” the older boy asked.

Brian shrugged. “You’ll have to wait and find out.” He looked up into Ianto’s big, blue eyes. He really was gorgeous with glitter from the show still scattered through his long hair, his partially bare chest gleaming with sweat. No, he needed to get his mind out of the gutter, god knows it lives there half the time.

It happened so quickly, Brian didn’t have time to react, but before he knew it Ianto had grabbed him by the back of the head, and pulled him into a hard, alcohol-induced kiss. It hardly mattered, he’d got what he wanted. It was over almost as suddenly as it had started as Brian felt someone pulling him back.

“Brian!” Stef said urgently. “We have to go.” He looked scared, eyes wide and brow covered in sweat.

“What the hell!?” Brian asked, more frustrated than he’d been in a long time.

“We have to fucking go!” the blonde yelled.

“Jesus, Stef! Where’s Courtney, what’s wrong?”

Stef looked around as if it make sure nobody else was listening. “He’s in the bathroom, he’ll catch up but you and I have to go right now.” He whispered loudly.

Brian didn’t know what was going on but he couldn’t stay here with his band mate behaving like this. “Fine, just give me a minute.” He said, turning back to Ianto who, like Brian, was looking completely baffled.

“No! We have to go NOW! NOW!” Stef protested.

The black haired boy turned around again, almost annoyed enough to smack his friend. “Fuck! Just wait a- Oh shit...” it was then he saw the reason Stef was so urgent to leave. “Ok, let’s go.”

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Sorry to end it there but it was getting SUPER long...

A/N:
1. You know the drill. Comments/criticism/like?/dislike?/questions/hate mail etc.
2. Free cyber cookies to anybody who understands the Hanlon Riots and Cygnet Committee =p
3. 'Cos I just know someone will point this out, I realise 20th Century Boy isn't a Placebo song, but they do an awesome cover of it =)
4. Should I keep going?
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- 26
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Without You I'm Nothing (Chapter 39 up now!)