Lust In Love | By : Majer Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > Linkin Park Views: 1369 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know the members of Linkin Park. I do not make any money from the writing of this story. |
The following morning.
The warmth from the sun woke her up as it broke through the curtains and hit her face. Trying hard to collect her thoughts, she opened her eyes and sat up in bed. As she placed her feet on the floor, she ran a hand over her forehead and sighed. A sudden wave of discomfort came rushing over her, putting a hand over her mouth; she ran to the bathroom and kneeled down by the toilet. Emptying herself completely, she felt a tear run down her cheek. She flushed and got up from the cool tiled floor.
Looking herself in the mirror, she shuttered as the image before her seemed to be nothing like herself. Bloodshot eyes, messy hair and pale skin were dominating her appearance. Darting her gaze away from the horrid picture in front of her, she turned on the water to take a shower, hoping that it would cleanse her sad being. She slowly pulled her t-shirt over her head and checked the water’s temperature with her one hand while the other was removing her underwear. Slowly she moved herself inside the stall and felt the water run over her tired body, making her mind clearer by the second. The soap seemed to erase the many flaws she had seen her reflection. Stepping out of the shower, she turned off the water and reached for a towel.
As she wrapped it around her body, her hand brushed her stomach quickly. Stopping for a second, she looked down and placed her hand back on her stomach. A smile took over on her lips as she remembered. The smile faded a little when Rob’s face appeared in her mind, and it suddenly became clear to her that she still needed to tell him about the baby. Her mind was dominated with thoughts regarding his reaction being extremely important to her future happiness made her stomach tense up as if a cramp was taking place. The sound of the phone ringing made her cringe in surprise and she went back into the bedroom, placing herself on the bed, she picked up the phone with one hand still placed on her stomach.
“Hello?” Her voice sounded sleepy even though she felt completely awake by now.
“Morning sunshine. Did I wake you?” Rob’s sweet and loving voice filled her mind with twirling thoughts and images of her lover’s smile and eyes.
“No... “ She cleared her throat and removed her hand from her stomach as if he could see sus suspect something. “I just finished taking a shower.”
“I see. Did you miss me?” The cheeky sound of his voice sent her into yet another frenzy of thoughts and images. She did miss him. Badly.
“So… what do you want?” She stopped her thoughts for a moment and questioned her remark. Why hadn’t she just told him ‘yes’? Why was she so afraid that he would sense that something wasn’t like it used to be?
“Uhm…” Rob sounded like he was thrown off his track of thoughts and stumbled a little over his words as he continued. “I don’t really want anything. Just felt like calling you since I missed you last night. It was strange not having you by my side.”
”Yeah… I know the feeling.” She smiled into the receiver but could tell from her own voice that it didn’t sound convincing.
“Yeah.” Her mind was racing to find things to say that would make the conversation less awkward, but she couldn’t. Damning herself for doing this, she started thinking about the picture perfect months they had shared with each other and how happy she felt inside. Only if it wasn’t for this fear of letting him know the truth.
“So… do you have any plans for tonight?” Her voice seemed a million miles away as she was still mostly concentrated on her thoughts.
“Besides sleeping next you to?!” She could almost hear his smile. “No… nothing.”
“Nice… I will be looking forward to that.” Gemz rested her head on the pillow and closed her eyes, trying to imagine his body resting next to hers.
“Good. But let me call you later about the details, okay?” He was starting to sound a little distant, and she opened her eyes with a confused look in her eyes.
“Sure. I’ll talk to you later, then.” She sat back up and sighed feeling a headache on its way.
“Yeah… love you.” His voice was already slightly disappearing as the words of love came to her, when he hung up.
---
Rob looked at the phone and wondered why she had sounded so off. It wasn’t like he had said anything psetpset her. And he knew for sure that everything between them was fine. Maybe she was just being tired or coming down with something. Rob couldn’t really shake the feeling that she was upset about something. The worst thing that could happen would be her doubting their love. All of a sudden he was questioning what he had planned. To begin with, his first intuition was to wait. He didn’t want to push their relationship into something it wasn’t ready for yet. But if she had an ounce of doubt in her mind, he couldn’t take that chance. He had to do something about it. Soon. Now.
---
Later in the night
The previous concerns over Rob not having called her like he promised were all thrown out of Gemz’ mind the minute the phone started ringing in the middle of the night. She had hoped for an excuse like him having had practise till really late. But instead all she heard was a distraught Rob. He had sounded very upset over the phone, and Gemma was trying to push away all the terrible things he could have to say to her when she got there. She hadn’t had the nerve to actually tell him about the baby. She had been too afraid when they spoke this morning and now, 5 minutes ago, when he rang her. He had sounded like his world was crashing down and it definitely wasn’t the time to tell him.
What could be so urgent that he needed her to come over so late? She looked at the clock in the car and sighed. 2:27am. She hadn’t been sleeping though, in fact she hadn’t been able to sleep since the second the first speculation had entered her mind. She’d had a feeling that something was… different for a while now. But hadn’t wanted to take a test. Until the day before. The doctor’s note today only gave her the answers she’d known for a long time now. But it made everything more real.
She pulled up to Rob’s place and turned the engine off. The lights were out and she was again overwhelmed with fear of what would happen. She walked up to the door and right before she opened it, she thought about knocking. Just in case. She knocked a single time, but didn’t wait for an answer and walked inside.
She was surprised to see candles lit in the living room and rose peddles leading a trail to the love seat placed in the middle of the room. She went over to it, and noticed a small red note. “Take a seat, my love.” She felt a pressure on her chest and gealleally nervous. What was this? But before she knew it, she felt a smile on its way. She loved him.
After sitting in the love seat for a minute or two, she saw a familiar figure appear by the doorframe. She didn’t know what to say or if to say anything at all. Her whole body was shivering with anticipation. He came closer to her and she could finally see his face in the light from the candles.
“Hello beautiful.” His voice was soft and loving, which as always sent shivers down her spine. She smiled in return, still not able to utter a single word. He sat down next to her and both the silence and the closeness made her relax more.
“I love you, Gemz.” Again his voice could send vibrations through her body and they were sitting so close that she could almost feel his breath on her skin.
“I love you too, Rob.” Her voice had a hint of wish to know what was going to happen. But the words only came out as a whisper and she only hoped that he had been able to hear her. The smile on his lips told her that he had. “But right now you are freaking me out. Why did you sound so upset over the phone?” She had a glimpse in her eye and he laughed.
“Sorry, but I had to make sure you would come over. Sorry.” With a chuckle trapped in his throat, he continued. “I think that…” He looked her in the eye and paused which made her impatient.
“You think what?” He smiled and took her hand.
“I don’t want to freak you out even more.” He chuckled and squeezed herd ond once again before talking. “But I think that I’m in love with you, and I’d to stay that way…” He cleared his throat and his eyes became intense. “…Forever.” She felt her eyes get misty and had no idea what to say. But so far it didn’t seem like he wanted a response. “I’d like you to do me a favour. Be mine forever.” His eyes searched hers with great passion. “Will you marry me?” Still not able to say anything, Gemma nodded and smiled. Rob’s arms flew around her and she lost herself in his embrace.
“But…” Gemma choked out the word. “I need to ask you something.”
“Yeah?” She could see how nervous his body became within a second.
“Are you asking me cause you talked to Brad? Or Emily?” Gemma had to let her sceptical side take over cause she didn’t want Rob to feel obligated.
“Brad or Emily?” He looked at her with questioning eyes. “Why? What do you mean?”
“So you haven’t?” They both spoke softly and were caressing each other’s hands.
“They know about this. My plans… if that’s what you mean.” Rob could tell that Gemma was holding something back.
“I see…” She smiled. “Well… I have a little secret to tell you about.”
“Okay…” Rob took a deep breath and grabbed a hold of both of Gemma’s hands.
“Yesterday at Brad and Emily’s… I discovered that…” She paused and kissed him quickly on the lips. “… That we’re expecting.” She took his hands and placed them on her stomach with a nervous smile on her face. Rob’s eyes widened and his chin dropped.
“For real?” He tried to hide the obvious shock.
“Yeah. Pretty big news, eh? I’m sorry I didn’t tell you this morning, but I’ve been so afraid of how you would take it.” She smiled even more when she felt his thumb on her cheek; caressing.
“We’re going to be a real little family now…” He said mostly to himself while returning her smile.
“Scary?” His eyes suddenly changed into a form of shock as reality hit him. Was he ready? She saw it and felt her stomach tie up into a knot. This was not happening. Was he regretting that he had asked her to marry him? She saw the confusion in his face and smiled softly. Gently letting go of his hands, she stood up. “I understand. Take your time.”
She walked out of the living room and left him behind, sitting in the love seat. She looked back a single time and found him to stare out into thin air looking more confused. But he wasn’t looking her way. She sighed, and told herself that maybe he just needed some time since it was such a big thing.
She walked out of the front door and shuttered as the cold wind met her. It had started to rain and by now it was raining pretty heavily. She felt her eyes getting misty when she thought of the expression on Rob’s face. Suddenly she heard the front door open behind her, and she head Rob’s voice yell out to her.
“NO! Not scary.” She turned around and saw him in the doorway. He ran down towards her and embraced her. “Perfect. Just perfect. That’s my dream.” He leaned in towards her and kissed her with as much force and passion as he had within him. They were both shaking and soaking but none of them made a move to go inside to find shelter from the rain. They didn’t care. They kept looking at each other and a smile spread across Gemma’s face.
“So… are we finally happy now?” She asked still awfully close to his lips.
“Better late than never, huh?” He chuckled and kissed her softly and quickly.
“Perfect.” She smiled against his lips.
“Gemz…e nee never both lusted and loved someone at the same time. But you… you really got under my skin.” Rob shivered from the cold wind and ran a hand through his hair that was dripping with soft raindrops.
“You mean everything to me. I can’t believe I almost threw it all away.” She touched his face gently and smiled.
“I love you.” His voice was so soft and full of love that Gemma felt a single tear make it’s way down her face and he watched it mix with the many raindrops.
“I lust you too…” She said with a wink and once again he leaned forward and made their lips connect while the rain surrounded them with such beauty and force.
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