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Hard to Say	By : VenusMoon Category: My Chemical Romance > General Views: 1267 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know the members of My Chemical Romance. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

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Quinn opened the door to the room he was sharing with Bert to find him pacing beside the bed, running his hands through his hair repeatedly and muttering to himself.

“Bert, what happened?”

Bert looked up, madness burning in his eyes. “He loves me. He said he fucking loves me. What the fuck was I supposed to do, say it back?”

“Well, do you?”

“No! Fuck no! What the fuck man, you know me. I don’t fall in love with dudes! I DON’T FALL IN LOVE WITH ANYBODY!!”

Quinn blinked and took a step back. Sure, he’d seen Bert get upset before, he was always either insanely happy or insanely upset, but he’d never seen it this bad.

“AAAAHHHH!” Bert screamed, slamming his fist into the wall. Then he just stopped moving, leaning back against the wall, eyes closed. When he opened them again, the madness had drained away to be replaced with remorse. He slowly slid down the wall, pulling his knees to his chest as his body was racked with sobs.

“What have I done?” he kept repeating between convulsions.

Quinn sat next to him, draping an arm around his shoulders, waiting for the sobs to subside before speaking. “Okay, now. Tell me coherently. What happened?”

Bert took a deep, shaky breath. “After you guys left, we started making out on the bed. Things were going fine, but then he told me he loved me, and…I don’t know, I just….snapped, I guess.”

“And by snapped you mean…?”

Bert’s face contorted in pain as he remembered the things he’d said and the look of shock and horror on Gerard’s face, before he broke into tears again. “I screamed at him. I told him I could never love him, and then, and then I ran away!” he wailed, sobbing violently again.

“Whew, thank god. As long as you didn’t hit him.”

“Hit him? I could never hit Gee. I love hi-” he stopped, his eyes widening in shock at his own words as he clapped his hand over his mouth.

Quinn smiled and pulled Gerard into a hug. “Its okay, Bert, you’re allowed to love someone. More importantly, you’re allowed to let someone love you.”

Bert clung to Quinn tightly, still shaking. “I’m scared,” he whispered. “And this conversation is pointless anyway. Its not like he’s ever gonna speak to me again, not after the way I acted. Jesus! What am I going to do?” he cried, burying his face into Quinn’s neck.

“Shh, it’ll be okay. Just give him some time to cool down, then apologize. If he loves you like he says, he’ll forgive you.” Quinn looked down to find Bert had fallen asleep. Struggling with the weight of another grown man, he managed to lift him into bed. He placed a kiss on his forehead before heading to Frank and Gerard’s room, hoping to perform some sort of damage control.

*********

“Shh, baby its okay. Tell me what happened.”

Gerard stopped sobbing and jumped to his feet, nearly knocking Frankie over. “What happened? I’ll tell you what happened! I’m a stupid fucking idiot, that’s what happened!”

“Oookaay…care to clarify?”

“I did what you told me. I told him the truth. I told Bert fucking McCracken that I loved him. I should paint ‘bleeding idiot’ across my forehead for tomorrow night’s show, because that’s what I am!” he blurted, his voice bordering on hysteria.

Frankie stood up and placed his hands on Gerard’s shoulders, turning him around to face him. “Gee, do me a favor…breathe.”

Gerard slumped down, using the toilet as a chair. “I don’t know what I was expecting anyway. Bert doesn’t love anyone but himself. I was a fool for even thinking we might have something.”

Frankie sat on his knees in front of Gerard, using three fingers to tilt his head up. He wiped a tear from Gerard’s cheek with his thumb. Gerard didn’t even realize he’d started crying again.

“I’m sorry, Gee. I never would have told you to tell him the truth if I didn’t truly believe he felt the same.” Damn him! Frankie thought. I guess that bastard got what he wanted . “Come on,” he said, pulling Gerard to his feet. “We bought snacks when we went out for beer. Let’s go curl up with some junk food and watch shitty sitcoms.”

Gerard smiled and wrapped his arms around Frankie. “Thanks, man. I don’t know if I ever told you, but I’m really glad you’re my best friend.” Frankie just smiled and led Gerard to the bed.

He was just about to doze off when he heard a knock at the door. Gerard had fallen asleep about ten minutes into the first episode of Cheers, so Frankie tried desperately not to wake him as he maneuvered his arm out from under Gerard’s head. He pulled the blanket up over his sleeping body and answered the door.

“Hey, how’s Gee?”

“Sleeping,” Frank whispered, stepping into the hallway and closing the door behind him. “What about Bert?”

Not that he actually cared, but…

“Same. He was a fucking wreck, though.”

“Boo fucking hoo man,” Frank snapped, his voice raising. He took a deep breath and continued quietly. “He had no right to treat Gee like that.”

Quinn sighed. “I know. I was hoping I’d get to talk to Gerard, but I guess its better if he just gets some sleep for now.”

“What were you gonna say? Sorry my best friend’s a dickhead?”

“Look, Frankie, Bert loves Gerard. You know that as well as I do. He’s just…scared. Give them some time to cool down….” he paused, an odd expression crossing his face. “Will you do me a favor?”

Frankie sighed, closing his eyes and rubbing his temples. “Yeah man, what?”

“Just try to convince Gee to talk to Bert. You know how Bert is. He won’t make the first move.”

“Umm, have you met Gee? Because he’s not going to, either.”

Quinn had to smile at that. “Those two stubborn idiots need to hurry up and live happily ever after.”

Frankie chuckled. “Well, it would definitely relieve some of our stress.”

Quinn allowed himself a small giggle, and yawned. “Alright, dude, I’m gonna try to get some sleep. You should do the same, aren’t you guess debuting that new cover song you and Gee have been working on tomorrow night?"

Frank nodded. He’d almost forgotten.

“K, see ya tomorrow at sound check?”

“Yeah, isn’t that gonna be a barrel of fucking monkeys,” Frankie replied, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “Night, Quinn.”

“Night.”

Frank walked back in the room a stretched out across the bed. He couldn’t believe he’d almost forgotten about that song. He’d been so excited to sing a duet with Gee. Suddenly, he snapped up, fumbling beside the bed for his cell phone. Why didn't he think of this before?

“What, dude?” a very sleepy sounding Quinn mumbled.

“Listen. I’ve got an idea.”

*********

Bert sat backstage, watching Gerard finish up their sound check. Just breathe, he thought as Gerard slammed his mic down and stormed off stage, right in Bert’s direction. Yeah, he’s still pretty mad. Can you say understatement of the century? He stood up and ran after Gerard, trying to catch up.

“Gee!! Gee, wait up!”

Gerard stopped and spun around. “Just leave me the fuck alone! I don’t want to see you!!” he snapped, his voice raising to an unnaturally high pitch. He turned around and kept walking.

“Gee, please! Just let me say what I need to say!” he cried, grabbing Gerard’s arm in an attempt to stop him.

“You’ve already said enough, damnit!" he yanked his arm from Bert's grip. "Now. Leave. Me. ALONE!!” he screamed, slamming his fists into Bert’s chest, knocking him to the ground. He sat there stunned, watching Gerard walk onto his bus, slamming the door behind him.

Quinn walked up to Bert and pulled him to his feet.

“This is never going to work,” Bert said sadly, leaning his head on Quinn’s shoulder.

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Hard to Say