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Things I'll Never Say	By : EmilyRose Category: My Chemical Romance > General Views: 1917 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know the members of My Chemical Romance. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Thanks to xXBrokenxRosesXx, lolo313 and MCRsavdME for reviewing!

The great Alex (lolo313) has offered to help me write some smut, so perhaps there will be some of that soon bwahaha ;)

I had a great birthday, thank you all who wished me happy birthday!
I wished for Gerard Way, but didn't get him this time either which sucks.
If you want to give him to me please do so MWAHA, I'll give you a pot of gold! ^_^

I also have a oneshot MCR story about Gerard/OFM out now, read and review if you want.

Disclaimer; don't own don't sue. I have nothing but a messy room and dirty dishes.

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Mikey didn't know how long he had slept when he woke up from the door opening.
He lifted his head off the pillow and looked over at the door, to see Gerard enter the room.
His brother had a bothered look on his face, but Mikey didn't think much of it right then since he was so tired. He watched as Gerard bit his lip and ran a hand through his black hair. Oh Mikey loved Gerard's hair. It suited him perfectly, the way it fell around his face down to his shoulders. To Mikey, Gerard was the most beautiful man on the planet.

"Hey Mikers." Gerard said walking over to the bed and sitting down. Mikey didn't answer; he just laced his fingers together with Gerard's. The feeling of their fingers touching made Gerard tingle all over. God that a touch from someone could make you feel like that.

Gerard smiled as he looked down at his brother's sleepy face. His brother looked so happy, and yet so troubled at the same time. Gerard looked into Mikey's eyes, seeing nothing but the perfect color of his warm eyes. Gerard wished he could read his brothers eyes, like he once used to. He lifted a hand and took of Mikey's glasses putting them away on the bedside table.

Mikey let out a small grunt of discomfort when Gerard lied down next to him again, nuzzling closer. "Where were you?" Mikey finally asked drowsily. He scooted over on the bed, giving Gerard some more space as Gerard answered.

"I just had to think about something." He said placing his head on Mikey's shoulder. Yes he had something to think about. Something important, something that had been bothering him since they shared their first perfect kiss. Thinking of the kiss made Gerard's inside feel all warm and fuzzy. So much emotion washed over him as he thought of Mikey, and his lips.

"What?" Mikey asked, trying to suppress a yawn, failing miserably. Gerard noticed his brother being almost asleep and sighed a little.
"I'll tell you tomorrow, it's almost midnight, go to sleep Mikey." Gerard knew he had to tell him about his thoughts, but not tonight. He wanted to have tonight. He wanted to have Mikey sleep next to him, breathing in perfect rhythm with him. He wanted to hold his hand and feel the friction between then every time one of them moved in their sleep.

Mikey let out a grunt as he sat up, leaving Gerard lying down confused.
"Let's get under the covers." Mikey explained yawning. Gerard nodded and sat up as well.
They crawled under the covers Mikey lying down on his back once more, and Gerard lying next to him on his side, cuddling up to him. Mikey wrapped his arms around his brother, yawning yet again as he pulled him close. Mikey loved the feeling of being the 'man' right now. He was the younger and well, smaller of the two of them. But right now he felt much bigger and… older. He smiled at the thought and yawned a last time.

"I love you Gerard."
"I love you too Mikey."

Lying like that was bliss, for both of them. Mikey fell asleep almost instantly, but Gerard didn't want to fall asleep just yet. He listened to his brother's steady breathing and smiled as he heard Mikey give out a low snore. He wished they could stay like this forever. He wished that he would always fall asleep listening to Mikey's breathing. That Mikey could always be the last and first thing he saw each day. However, since Gerard was older, and wiser, he knew that it had to end.

He and Mikey would have to let go of this dream eventually. There was no way he and Mikey could live together, as lovers, forever.
No matter how much they loved each other, they would have to go separate ways. Gerard thought about it, and he could feel tears burning behind his eyes. He didn't want it to end. He wanted Mikey, always Mikey.

Finally he reached a decision. He would enjoy it while it lasted. He would love Mikey, with all his heart and he would spend as much time with him as he could. They didn't have school, since it was summer, and well… Maybe they could have their own summer dreams.

"Fuck!" Gerard mumbled as he realized how gay he was. "Summer dreams? Seriously.
Damn that's just. Gross." He thought as he closed his eyes to try and sleep.
After another ten minutes he managed to fall asleep, finally.

Gerard woke up before Mikey the next day, feeling awfully tired. He yawned and stretched, looking over that the clock. He groaned as he realized it was only 9am and he wanted to turn around to go back to sleep. Though his groan and shifting had awoken Mikey.
Mikey blinked a few times, to get used to the bright daylight coming through their window.
"What time is it?" He mumbled as he turned to his side, facing Gerard. He let his eyes wander over Gerard's face. From his eyes, that was partly covered by his long hair, to his perfect lips, that was currently curled into a smile.

"Just nine." Gerard said smiling at Mikey. His brother's hair was a complete mess of dark hair going everywhere. He lifted a hand to brush some of the hair out of Mikey's eyes as Mikey did the same with his long hair.

"Maybe we should get up, so that mom doesn't find us like this." Mikey whispered, even though he wanted nothing more than staying like that the rest of his life.
He reached behind him to receive his glasses, and then he put them on, making Gerard appear clearer than before.

Gerard nodded his head at Mikey's statement, but still none of them moved. Gerard leaned in on Mikey, carefully, still not being sure about the whole 'kissing my brother' deal. However Mikey leaned in as well, making Gerard a little more confident.

When their lips met Gerard felt lightheaded and his whole body tingled. At first their kiss was soft and careful. But then they became deeper and more passionate. Mikey felt a jolt going through his body as he felt Gerard's' tongue grace his bottom lip, begging for entrance.

He opened his mouth carefully, not being sure how far he wanted this to go. But it felt so good. Mikey had always thought that people who said some ones kisses tasted like strawberry was insane, but now he thought they must be the sanest people in the whole world. Okay okay Gerard's kisses didn't taste like strawberries. They tasted like cigarettes, toothpaste and… something that Mikey couldn't place. But he didn't care. This was amazing. He felt his brothers' tongue entwine with his own, and he couldn't help but letting out a moan as Gerard placed a hand on his thigh.

.

When Mikey moaned Gerard couldn't help but feel turned on. When he felt his pants getting tighter he stopped kissing Mikey abruptly. He wasn't ready for this, neither was Mikey. He loved Mikey he really did, but the thought of him getting a boner from making out with his brother kind of scared him a little.

Mikey looked at Gerard with confusion and sadness as his brother pulled away, thinking he had done something wrong. However Gerard cleared his mind from any 'this is wrong' thoughts and leaned in to kiss Mikey again. This time just pecking him a few times before pulling away again.

"I don't want it to go further then kissing today Mikers." He said leaning his forehead against Mikey's. He hoped he would understand, he didn't want Mikey to be angry with him. He was just doing what he thought was right. Mikey nodded and the sadness fled his eyes at once.
He knew what Gerard meant. He had felt himself being very affected by his brother exploring his mouth, and it had scared him a little. He had never had sex with a girl, and definitely not with a boy, so he didn't want to rush things.

He loved his brother, and trusted him, but he wasn't ready. Besides, they had all the time in the world.

Finally, after some more kisses, and loving words being whispered they knew they had to get up. They raced each other to the bathroom, both of them trying to reach it first so they could shower first. Gerard won, only due to the fact that he took advantage of being so much stronger then Mikey that he simply lifted his brother of the ground and threw him on his bed before running into their bathroom closing and locking the door behind him.
He heard Mikey shout things like 'cheater' and 'not fair' through the door but he just smiled to himself as he stripped out of his clothes.

Ten minutes later he stepped out of the shower, feeling so ashamed of himself. He was bright red, and had tears in his eyes. He couldn't believe what he had just done.
He had jacked of to the image of his brother!
His own fucking brother.
Sure they had kissed and made out and such but still.
He felt so bad and so ashamed. He took a towel and wrapped it around his waste as he cursed himself under his breath. This was so not okay. It was so wrong!
His head was still filled with sickening thoughts about himself as he opened the door, only to be attacked by Mikey.

"You sure stayed in there for a long fucking time!" He said pretending to be angry. He stopped however when he saw the look on Gerard's face. "Gee?" He said placing a hand on his older brother's shoulder, trying to comfort him. He drew his hand back when Gerard twitched from his touch.

Gerard didn't dare look Mikey in the eyes, and he didn't mean to react like that when Mikey touched him. He just felt completely disgusted with himself and he didn't know how to handle it. When he finally looked up at Mikey's face he could see how hurt he was that Gerard didn't want Mikey to touch him. "Mikey I'm sorry." He whispered wrapping his arms around his baby brother's body. He could feel Mikey shivering and shaking as he held him close.

"What's wrong?" Mikey asked trying to steady his voice. He knew that his brother never wanted to hurt him, so something must've happened while Gerard was in the shower. Maybe he had realized how sick they were, that they couldn’t keep on- NO! Gerard loves him, he would never…

"I did something awful." Gerard's words brought Mikey back out from his thoughts and he drew back from the hug and looked Gerard dead in the eye. "Tell me!" He said trying to sound like their father did when he wanted them to be honest about something.

Gerard took a deep breath and looked down at the floor. "I thought about you while I… When I-I… you know." He said preparing for the worst. He was surprised to hear Mikey chuckling and he looked from the floor to his brothers' smiling face.

"That's all?" He asked snickering. He had thought it was something horrible, that Gerard didn’t love him anymore, and all his brother had done was touching himself while thinking of him. He saw the confusion on Gerard's face and decided to tease him a little.
"Well I guess then you won't have any problem with me imagining you in this tiny towel while I shower." He whispered in Gerard's ear as he walked pass him and in to the bathroom before Gerard had a chance to reply.

"Well I guess then you won't have any problem with me imagining you in this tiny towel while I shower." Gerard didn't know what to think. His brother was okay with it? And… WHAT? The meaning of Mikey's words finally sunk in as he heard the bathroom door being locked. He stood there for a few minutes trying to realize what Mikey had said before smiling and walking over to his dresser to find some clothes.

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I had a lot of fun writing this, and I tried not to make it, uh, stupid xD
(If I get reviews I'll be happy and update faster *shakes fist* :P)
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Things I'll Never Say