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Good Intentions	By : willjames52 Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > Kelly Clarkson Views: 2454 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I have no connections to the real people named in this story, and make no money from it.

Chapter List
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Thanks for the replies, they're really sweet and funny, lol. I didn't want to leave it off in a suspenseful place for too long, so this is shorter than the previous chapters. I'll work on the rest of the chapter and hopefully have it up soon :)

Ch 3 Pt 1

Carrie dropped her book bag by the door so she wouldn’t forget it when she left, and then she ran back to the kitchen to find the fastest thing she could make for breakfast. She was already late for her first class, but she could still catch the last half of the class if she hurried. As Carrie looked through her refrigerator for something to eat, she thought about the night before. Robbie had stayed an hour longer than she had hoped he would, but she wouldn’t have kicked him out, and she really couldn’t have asked him to leave after Kelly had bailed on her in front of him.

She had gone to bed and forgotten to set her alarm because of her late night visitors. Carrie had woken up an hour and a half later than she normally would have, and she had rushed through her apartment non-stop since then. Carrie checked her watch as she took her quickly picked breakfast back to the living room and put it in her bag. She was lucky she had already packed her backpack with the books she would need for her classes, although she wasn’t going to have her reading done for the first class. She could always read for her two later classes after her first class, she just hoped that she would be able to concentrate on the material.

Carrie was a little worried about how Kelly had ran out the night before, which was another reason she had forgot to set her alarm, but she was kind of angry with Kelly also. She didn’t mind not saying anything to the band, but she really hadn’t thought Kelly would run out the second someone saw them together. She had wanted to follow Kelly and make sure everything was okay, maybe have Kelly come back so that Robbie didn’t think anything was wrong, but she had stayed and made sure that Robbie didn’t think that something was going on between her and Kelly; because that was what Kelly had wanted. Carrie grabbed her bag, though she turned back and started to look around for her keys when she realized she didn’t have them.

Kelly knocked loudly on the door to Carrie’s apartment while she mentally told herself there was a good explanation for why Carrie had lied to her. Her anger had diminished a bit during the drive to Carrie’s apartment, though she was still upset and she wanted some answers. Kelly crossed her arms over her chest as she anxiously waited for Carrie to let her into the apartment.

Carrie ran to the door once she found her keys. “Please don’t be a neighbor wanting something.” She didn’t have the patience, or the time, to deal with anyone from her complex at the moment. Carrie opened the door, ready to cut off one of her neighbors. “Kelly.” Carrie smiled before she leaned in and kissed the brunette’s cheek. “I would love to stay and talk, but I’m already late for class.”

Kelly backed up a few feet when Carrie stepped out of the apartment to leave and lock the door. She quietly watched the taller girl as she thought about how happy Carrie had looked at her arrival. She didn’t understand why Carrie had lied to her. The sweet demeanor in which Carrie was acting, along with trying to push her out of the way, was too much. “Why didn’t you tell we slept together that night?”

Carrie almost dropped her bag at Kelly’s question, though she managed to shoulder her bag and turn around once she had her apartment secure. “We didn’t.” Carrie wanted to punch something because of her frustration when she saw the look of disbelief on Kelly’s face. “We didn’t.” Carrie knew she didn’t have extra time, but she reached out to hold Kelly’s hand anyway.

Kelly took another step back and stared at Carrie. She wanted to believe the blonde, but her memories made it difficult for her. “Your necklace was on the floor with my clothes. I didn’t pick it up by accident. And you were the one who decided to check the bedroom first. You knew you had it last in there, we both know how you are about your necklace.” Kelly tried to hold her emotions in; she didn’t want Carrie to see how much she wanted to believe the drummer. “Why?”

Carrie shook her head as she tried to ignore her hurt feelings because Kelly had moved away from her. “We did not sleep together.” She looked at Kelly again to see if the other girl believed her. Carrie wanted to be angry that she hadn’t followed Kelly the night before, obviously Kelly had remembered something and was upset, but she was angry that Kelly didn’t believe her. “I swear we did not have sex. Let’s go back inside and talk-"

Kelly didn’t want to hear Carrie lie to her again, so she interrupted. “The dream I had last night proves otherwise!” She hadn’t meant to shout, but she couldn’t remain quiet when Carrie was just trying to calm her down. “Stop lying to me.”

Carrie dropped her bag on the ground and cautiously took a step towards Kelly. She wouldn’t go to class when Kelly was so upset. “I’m not lying to you. I wouldn’t do that; you know I wouldn’t do that to you, Kel.” Carrie shut her eyes for a moment when Kelly backed away from her again. She knew she had to tell Kelly everything about Friday, but it hurt and irritated her that Kelly couldn’t believe her, that the other girl continued to avoid her. “We didn’t have sex. We decided not to, because we were drunk.”

Kelly couldn’t help the incredulous look she gave Carrie. The blonde’s explanation didn’t make sense, but she was willing to listen. “Go on.” She hugged herself again when Carrie tried to hold her hand. She didn’t want Carrie to touch her. She was too confused to hold Carrie’s hand and still remember what had happened Friday night. She didn’t want to just give in because of how much she cared for Carrie.

Carrie backed away from Kelly and put her hands in her pockets. She didn’t want Kelly to deny her again, so she wouldn’t let herself reach out any more. She held on tighter to her keys as she tried to think of where to start her explanation, though a sniffle from Kelly made her look at the brunette. “We were drunk and we made out at the bar, you remember that. The stuff about leaving the bar and the taxi is all true, but once we got back here we started making out again. Things escalated pretty fast-"

“Yeah, we ended up naked in bed together.” Kelly continued to speak, even though Carrie was staring at her for the interruption. “Drunk, but we didn’t sleep together.”

Carrie wanted to walk away. Kelly’s sarcastic words frustrated her since she knew what Kelly was doing. “We didn’t.” Carrie removed her hands from her pockets and stepped forward. She quickly grabbed Kelly before the brunette could pull back. “I didn’t want to hurt you. I left because it was what we both wanted. You think I would have left you alone if I had known you were going to forget everything?” Carrie loosened her grip when Kelly refused to look at her. “I didn’t say anything because you woke up and freaked out on me. I just tried to fix it so you weren’t hurt.”

Kelly looked up at Carrie when the silence lengthened. She still didn’t understand why Carrie hadn’t told her. Carrie could have spoken up the night before when they had talked about their feelings, so there had to be a reason why Carrie hadn’t. She wanted to hug Carrie because of the sad expression on the younger girl’s face, but she didn’t believe Carrie completely. “So it was better that you lied to me, even though you knew I didn’t remember? It was better that you lied last night instead of telling me the truth? You know this is exactly why I didn’t want-"

“You know why.” Carrie let go of Kelly, though she continued to stare at the shorter girl. She had wanted to avoid the argument they were having now, that was why she hadn’t said anything to Kelly. She knew that Kelly would react badly, and she had been right. She wanted to just leave because of the way Kelly stared at her, like she was wrong, like she had planned to keep things from Kelly. “I didn’t say anything because you didn’t want to hear.”

Kelly took a step forward. “You should have told me. You could have told me last night after we had established what we are, and it wouldn’t have been a problem, but you decided to lie again.” Kelly stopped speaking when Carrie humorlessly chuckled.

"Establish what? What are we? We’re an ‘us’ but I’m not your girlfriend, you want to keep me a secret.” Carrie shook her head when Kelly looked down at the ground. “I didn’t want to keep it from you. Do you know how much it hurt me when I realized you didn’t even remember what had happened? That we had finally been real with each other, and you forgot it? Because you couldn’t deal with it.” Carrie walked back to where she had dropped her bag; she wasn’t going to stick around if Kelly wasn’t willing to listen to her.

Kelly didn’t know what to do, but she didn’t want Carrie to walk away. “That is not true. You know that I was drunk, it’s not my fault I couldn’t remember.” She knew Carrie was hurt, but it wasn’t like she had forgotten on purpose. “I’m sorry I didn’t remember, but you can see how I would be upset.” She blocked Carrie’s path when the blonde picked up the book bag and walked towards her. “You should have told me and neither of us would be hurt right now.”

Carrie sadly stared at Kelly for a few moments, although she knew Kelly was too stubborn to back down. “There is a reason nothing has happened with us in the eight months that we’ve known each other.” Carrie took her keys from her pocket as Kelly looked away from her. She waited a moment for Kelly to deny or confirm her thoughts. She didn’t want to leave, but she wouldn't stay if Kelly continued to blame her and deny the real reason Kelly was upset.

“The band. We couldn’t because of the band.” Kelly glared when Carrie repeated her words back while staring at her with a doubtful look. “I’m sorry that the band means so much to me, but you know that. You said you understood. Is that why you lied to me?” Kelly had to bite her lip when Carrie turned away and snickered at her. “What? This is serious. Why are you laughing when I’m trying to have a conversation with you. I could have just not come over at all, but I’m doing what you asked. I’m not shutting you out, I’m trying to hear your side.”

“No, you’re not.” Carrie sadly watched Kelly. She hadn’t laughed because she was amused, she just had been unable to believe Kelly couldn’t say the truth. “The truth is that nothing happened before Friday night because you didn’t want it to happen. You have always known that I like you. I know how much the band means to you, and out of respect to them and you, I have never made my feelings an issue. It’s pretty simple. You don’t want to make the decision, you don’t want to be the one to make it real." Carrie sighed at Kelly's inability to look her in the eyes. "It’s really shitty of you to yell at me, Kel. All I've ever done is looked out for you, even if it hurt me.”

Kelly honestly couldn’t believe that Carrie had said those things to her. She had wanted to leave the decisions up to Carrie, but she had proven that she wanted to be with Carrie. Maybe she had used the band as an excuse for too long, but she hadn’t run away from Carrie Saturday morning. “You shouldn’t of lied to me. We could have worked all this out without this fight. Neither of us would be hurt if you hadn't lied.”

Carrie took a step towards Kelly, though it took her a moment to look the shorter girl in the eyes. “I had to or you would have run away again. I’m sorry.” Carrie shouldered her book bag higher as she sorrowfully looked into Kelly’s eyes. “I wasn’t going to go back to pretending after what we did and said to each other. I can’t do that because I’m not scared like you.”

Kelly tearfully watched Carrie as she tried to hold in the urge to yell that Carrie was just making up excuses to shift the blame. She wanted to say the blonde was wrong, or to have Carrie hug her and say it was okay and that they could work it out, but she didn’t because part of her knew that Carrie was right. Kelly turned and walked back to her car. She was too angry to deal with the issues the younger girl had brought up, she was too angry to deal with Carrie.
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Good Intentions