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Murdoc's Victory	By : HellsFunnyHome Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > Gorillaz Views: 1744 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: Damien Albarn and Jamie Hewlett are the rightful owners of the Gorillaz. I don't know them, own them, or make any money from them. I also do not know any characters from the band Gorillaz. This is a creation of pure fiction, made up from

Chapter List
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"Bathroom, storeroom, who-knows-what room, door that leads no where-"
"Jesus how many rooms does Kong have."
"Dunno, pet, never bothered to count. Actually, uhuhuh, I can probably tell yah more rooms where I banged some chick in than what their purpose is." He cackled, not noticing Vicky's fake smile hiding the grimace on her face. "Right, so where were we? Ah yes, the cafeteria. Right this way, love, don't want to lose yah just yet." He pushed her along ahead of him. "Haven't even gotten to the most important part of the tour."
"And where would that be, huh, Mr. Murdoc?" She turned to look at him with a smirk on her face.
"Oh, you'll see." Looking at her round behind then back up to her face, Murdoc gave her his infamous womanizing grin. He saw the color in her face change and her pace quicken when she turned back around. "Whoa, there darlin'. Yah aren't tryin' to run away from me, now, are yah?" He walked up behind her and put his hands on her shoulders, loving the way she tensed at his presence. "Yah don't even know the way there."
His hands on her shoulders, the way he looked at her, it was all new to Vicky. She hadn't ever been with a man before and she wasn't sure how to take it. Vicky looked at Murdoc who was babbling on about this room and that room as they walked down the corridor. She liked him, there was no denying that, she just didn't like the way he talked about women: like they were nothing. Maybe she just didn't understand this type of relationship with guys. 'After all, guys simply had their heads permanently stuck in the gutter didn't they?' Vicky grinned, the thought suddenly reminding her of his personal presentation at the Grammy's.
"Hey, Murdoc?" She interrupted.
"Yes, love? What is so important that yah had to interrupt me in the middle of my tour?"
"Oh I'm so sorry." She rolled her eyes at him and smiled. She seemed to be doing a lot of that since she started spending time with him. "But I just remembered watching you play at the Grammy's."
"Ah yes, the Grammy's. Wonder show that night. Madonna was spot on that night. Mmmm." He said, his eyes looking as if they wandered off.
"Riiiight. Anyway, what I was trying to say is one: great performance and two: what the hell were you doing to your bass?"
"Full frontal pelvis thrust bass shaggin', pet. That's what that was."
"Bass shagging? Really?"
"Yes, 'really'. If yah don't believe me, doll, I could always give yah a demonstration." He nudged her.
"No thanks," she laughed, "I'm good. Don't need any sort of demonstration."
"Such a shame. But whatever, it's only a matter of time."
"Time?" Vicky questioned, up until now Murdoc had been pretty flirtatious with her and she had happily reciprocated the teasing– that was fine. Him insinuating how easily he could get her into bed; that was not.
"Yes time. Oh looky, here we are! Let's grab a bite to eat shall we?"
"Let's." She pushed the doors open, seeing first the cat before anything. "Whoah. Cat."
"Yeah, he looks after the place." He followed her to a table and sat across from her. "So what'll it be?"
"Dunno. What're you having?"
"Steak and potatoes!"
"They have that? This doesn't really look like a place that would carry steak and potatoes, no offense."
"Takes a lot more than simple words to offend me, doll. And yes they have it. What kind of ultra-famous rockstar would I be if I didn't have my own chef prepare gourmet meals for whenever I-" He was interrupted by a strange guttural moan that came from the corridor outside of the cafe. Vicky looked at Murdoc and Murdoc simply stared at the door.
"What was-"
"Shh! Shh, shh, shh, shh, shush!" He quieted her with his hands, his eyes still glued to the doors.
Vicky's eyes quickly scanned the cafe, in case there was something else to be wary off. Her eyes stopped at Murdoc, whose stare was set very intensely at the door, before hearing the guttural moan again this time right outside the door. Taking a quick glance at the the cafe entrance, Vicky looked back at Murdoc who had stood up quietly and was slowly heading towards the door.
Murdoc turned around to see Vicky looking at him with a bit of fear and whole lot of confusion written all over her face. He was peeved. Right when he was given the chance to try and seduce the young Latina, a zombie had to show up. A zombie! He had thought Noodle got rid of them all when she remodeled Kong. He hated zombies, and he was going to show this one a thing or two about interrupting Murdoc Alphonce Niccals while he was trying to get shagged. He looked at the door and slowly reached for it, hoping that with being quiet he could catch the damn thing by surprise, bash it's brains in, send it back to Hell, impress Vicky and then give her a bit of the old in-out, in-out. Yes this was a good plan.
Reaching for the, Murdoc never expected to be slammed straight into the ground. That upset him first. Second, he never expected to look up at the confounded stare of 2D walking into the cafe like a bloody zombie, moaning like a stupid little shit. That set of Murdoc even further and without thinking twice about it, he jumped up and tackled 2D to the ground, punching and slamming his head into the ground in the process. 'He might not be a real zombie but I can still bash his brains in.'
"Ahh! Stop! Wot ah do? No, no, no, no, no!"
"Yah bleedin' little shit. I'll show ya!"
This was awkward. There was no other word for it. I mean, seeing Murdoc just go spastic on this blue haired lanky guy was definitely making Vicky rethink spending time with the bassist.
"Murdoc stop!"
Suddenly remembering that he was here with Vicky, Murdoc let go of 2D, looking at him in the process. "Hey Faceache, watch it next time or I'll punch yah so hard yahr eyes will fall straight outta yahr arse." He growled, slumping back into his seat and putting his shoes on the table, his mood turning sour.
2D, on the other hand, was confused. What had he done? He had been walking around Kong bored when he felt hunger gnaw at him and since he had just finished watching Romero's "Night of the Living Dead" he thought it funny to act like a zombie looking for sustenance. And then, next thing he knows, Murdoc is beating him down! Again! He rubbed his head, groaning as he felt a lump appear and with it a headache. Where his pills? Looking into his pockets, seemingly forgetting the ordeal that just occurred, he looked up seeing Murdoc smoking a fag and a girl sitting at a cafeteria table. Wait a tick, a girl? What was a girl doing here in the cafe, usually Murdoc just takes them straight to his Winnie to shag them rotten. "Owww..." He needed his pills, all this thinking was making his headache worse.
This was officially uncomfortable for Vicky and she wasn't quite sure she wanted to stick around anymore. Hanging around Murdoc was starting to look like a bad idea, even if she did enjoy flirting with him. She could always find someone else to play around with, right? Right. But first, she felt bad for the stranger on the ground and decided she should help him since he looked like he was having a hard time processing what just happened and Murdoc sure didn't look like he cared about beating him up. She frowned at Murdoc who was grumbling with his arms crossed, puffing away at a cigarette, and stood up rather aggressively.
"Where yah going?"
"To help the guy that you just beat up for no reason."
"Wha-I-Did yah not just see that? He just near broke my nose for the ninth time!"
"Yeah, by accident. And nothing happened to you, stop being a baby." She walked to the man on the ground and put out her hand. "You alright?"
2D looked up to see a young tanned woman holding out her hand. "Wot? Oww." He closed his eyes, the light making his headache pound.
"I said are you alright?"
Murdoc did not like being ignored, especially if it was because of the sputtering little twit on the ground. Grinding his teeth he inhaled and exhaled his fag quickly, annoyed by the scene unfolding in front of him. "Don't bother with him, he's a bleedin' idiot!"
Rolling her eyes, Vicky ignored Murdoc and grabbed his large pale hand, pulling him up. "You alright there? Do you need anything?"
"Me pills." 2D held onto his head, not paying much attention to the young woman in front of him or Murdoc who looked absolutely livid.
Seeing them under a chair, Vicky quickly grabbed them and gave them to their owner who quickly swallowed two pills dry. "Better?"
"That's it, this is getting sappy. Would yah please just sit down? Hey Faceache, sit down so I can get back to Vicky."
Vicky was surprised to see this man actually listen to Murdoc and sit at the table. If it had been her she probably would have cursed him out or something but whatever. She didn't know them nearly well enough to know what type of friendship they had, so she followed suit as well and sat down in her seat.
"See, ol' two-dents here is sound as a pound. Aren't yah?"
"I dunno, he looks kind of out of it to me." Vicky looked at Murdoc. She was still upset at his outburst but they both looked like there was nothing wrong so she figured she might as well take their attitude. "Hello, I'm Vicky. You ok? That was some beating you took." She said, suddenly recognizing this as the singer of the band from the Grammy's. He was cuter in person.
2D looked at the woman across from him who had apparently spoken to him. His headache had gone down but he could still feel it ever so slightly. "Uh, 'ello... Yew los' me at a' 'ello." He smiled sheepishly at her, showing off his two missing front teeth.
Murdoc rolled his eyes, breathing deeply as he heard Vicky answer 2D. He noticed how quickly they started chatting away as if he wasn't there but he didn't say anything. He wanted her in his bed and having her upset at him would not make things easier, so he just let her cool off while talking to Faceache. It didn't last very long, obviously. As the group's self-appointed leader Murdoc knew he was the one who should be getting the attention and was about to interrupt their chatter when he heard helicopters overhead. He looked at Vicky and 2D, they had apparently not heard it but Murdoc's trained ears knew that he had better deal with them now before they came and took him away. Deciding he would try and get Vicky into bed another time, Murdoc had more pressing matter to attend to right now so he stood up and ran out of the cafe.
Vicky frowned turning back to 2D, "What's his deal?"
"Eh, who knows. Anyways, there ah was, seven years old, watchin' Romero's 'Day of the Dead' ready to piss me pants! I've been obsessed wif zombie films evah since."
"So that would explain the T-Virus shirt."
"Wot?"
"You're shirt. It's reference to Resident Evil's Tyrant virus, right?"
"Yeh. Ah luv all zombie films, we could watch one in me room if yew wan'." He looked at her expectantly.
"Um... Actually I think I'll be going actually. It's been a weird day and I really should be getting back to my home."
"Yeh, awrigh'. But if yew evah, like, wanna watch a zombie film lemme know. Ah got loads in me room. It could be a film festival or sumfink."
His smile was contagious and he was really nice so Vicky figured, 'What the hell,' and agreed to meet up with him to hang out sometime. "Bye, I'll you later!"
"See yew."
And with that she left Kong, oblivious to Murdoc standing on the roof, looking at her go before shooting at a pirate jet.
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Murdoc's Victory