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Close Your Eyes and Settle	By : psychotic4llyxyours Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > Slipknot Views: 6064 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know the members of Slipknot. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 3
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- 5
Chapter Four: I'm Bound to Come Around

The first thing Joey felt when he woke up for the fourth time that day was the uncomfortable, cold, wet mess in his pants. The second thing he noticed was the delicious smell torturing his nostrils. He inhaled deeply the mouth-watering scent of chicken soup. First, though… he squirmed. He had to get some different pants.

There was a pair folded at the foot of the bed. He smiled at Wednesday's considerateness and changed into the clean ones after he'd turned the bedside lamp on; he was glad the power was back.

In the bathroom, he stared at himself for a long time in the mirror. What had he allowed to happen? He felt so strange, so wrong. He couldn't accept the fact that he was attracted to a murderer. It was horrible what they'd done, despicable, disgusting… and he'd enjoyed it. The fact alone that Wednesday was dangerous and so remorseless about what he'd done had a sort of effect on Joey that he didn't want to think about. He shook his head and tried to bury the feelings.

Joey dragged himself downstairs, though he was reluctant to face Wednesday. He was aware that he hadn't eaten since breakfast and that he really needed some food because he was getting hungry. He found Wednesday standing in front of the stove, spatula in hand, grilling sandwiches on the stove. Joey walked quietly, hoping to remain unnoticed, but when he was a few feet away, Wednesday turned around and smiled. Joey failed to hide his cringe.

Wednesday ignored the look Joey gave him and asked, "Is this okay? Chicken noodle and grilled cheese… my personal favorites."

Joey nodded and looked around for a clock. There was one on the far wall near the living room. It was only eleven-thirty, but as much as Joey had slept that day and the way the lights were on in the house, it made Joey feel like it was early morning. He rubbed his eyes and picked up a bowl of soup and a sandwich once Wednesday was finished cooking.

They ate in relative silence because Joey was too busy devouring the food to talk. Only the occasional unintentional slurp of soup interrupted his quietness. Wednesday watched him eat, smirking at how the soup ran down Joey's chin before Joey wiped it off. When Joey was finished, he burped and grinned, embarrassed.

"S'cuse me."

Wednesday smiled.

"So, where're we going tonight?" Joey asked, drumming his fingers on the wooden table.

"I thought you wanted me to show you the attic?"

"Oh, yeah. Okay." He continued to drum, using the spoon as a cymbal.

"You're pretty good at that," Wednesday noted absently as he finished off his soup. He stood, got their bowls, and put them in the dishwasher.

"Yeah, I have a drum set at my house that I practice on. Like, sometime tomorrow, do you think we could go over and pick me up some clothes? I'm almost sure my mom won't be home 'cause she goes out, like, all the time."

"Yeah, sure," Wednesday said as nonchalantly as he could.

Joey didn't suspect a thing. He stood up. "So, how many rooms does this house have?"

Wednesday shrugged. "Um… a lot."

Joey left the kitchen and started walking up the spiraling staircase with Wednesday close behind him. Once they were on the second floor, Joey paused and looked down at the living room. Only a four-foot high wooden railing separated him from the ledge where he could fall. Wednesday hit his arm and motioned for him to follow, so Joey did. They went the opposite way from Wednesday's bedroom, way down the hall, until Wednesday finally stopped. He jumped to knock the ceiling and a hinged rectangle popped out of it. Attached to the rectangle was a ladder. The space where it led was dark.

"Okay, it's probably dusty 'cause I don't usually come up here," Wednesday warned. He pushed Joey in front of him and made him climb first.

Joey immediately started coughing the moment he sat down on the floor. There was some sort of old-fashioned perfume that had polluted the entire room. Joey's eyes watered with the allergic effect it had on him. He moved over so Wednesday could get up and they sat there for a moment until Wednesday stood and pulled a chain above them.

Light flooded the room and revealed a very old, apparently untouched, girl's bedroom. Near the far right corner was a white vanity with a mirror and a small chair. There was a twin bed with a pink canopy over it that was filled with dust so that the mesh seemed to be solid material. Toward the left side of the room were a bunch of pillows and stuffed animals. Confused, Joey looked at Wednesday.

"Uh… my mom sorta wanted a girl. This would've been my room if I'd come out the way they wanted me to." There was a hint of loathing in his eyes as he looked around the room.

"My bedroom was in the attic of my old house," Joey said. He went over to the vanity and looked at himself in the mirror. There was a small music box on the counter and he wound it up. Für Elise tinkled out slowly and Joey wound it up more so that it'd go faster and last longer, then walked back and slid down to the floor in front of Wednesday. "Do you ever feel weird about what you did?" he asked, nervously twirling his hair.

"No, I don't," Wednesday replied coldly. "What makes you ask that?"

Joey shrugged. "I was just wondering what it felt like to, you know, do something like that." He didn't say it, but thought how warped Wednesday's mind must have been for him to act so careless. It was creepy. "You never think about it?"

Wednesday smiled humorlessly. "Quit trying to analyze me. It doesn't do any good to think about it because even if I could go back in time, I wouldn't change what I did. Life experiences, you know? Obviously, you've thought about doing something similar or you wouldn't be asking all this shit. The only thing that makes us different is that I went through with it."

"You're right," Joey said quietly. He winced as he accidentally tugged too hard and pulled several long black strands of hair from his head.

Für Elise finally stopped playing and the only sound was that of the rain hitting the roof.

"Don't freak out if the lights go off again. The wires outside are frayed and when they get wet, they screw up," Wednesday said, absently picking his black fingernail polish off. When he looked back up, Joey was staring at him so intently that he moved back a little. "Whoa, what's the problem?"

Joey blinked and moved back as well, surprised at himself. "S-Sorry," he stuttered. He scratched the scabbed cut on the side of his face because it was itching as it healed.

"Wanna go back downstairs before the power goes out?"

"Why would the power go out again?" Joey asked, aghast.

Wednesday raised his eyebrow. "Didn't you hear a word I just said?"

"I don't guess so… Sorry. Why would it go out?"

"The wires are frayed and they screw up when they get wet." Wednesday frowned. "Are you okay?"

Joey was already climbing down the ladder. "Yeah, I'm fine." Just fine, he thought silently. The only thing that was the matter with him was his conscience, screaming at him to try to get home and away from the deviant creature that was so nice to him, so sweet. What was wrong with Wednesday? Joey would have never, in a million years, had the faintest clue that Wednesday'd done what he'd done; it didn't seem possible. In fact, a part of Joey's mind still refused to believe it. That part of his mind still insisted that Wednesday was playing a joke on him, just picking at him to see what his reaction would be to such a situation. The logical part, though, the part that knew best, knew also that what Wednesday had told him was the brutal, sickening truth. The internal wars being waged inside Joey's mind were making him distant, contemplative, and while he tried not to stare at the other boy, he just couldn't stop himself.

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And when your fears subside you… and shadows still remain…
I know that you can love me when there's no one left to blame,
So never mind the darkness, we still can find a way…
'Cause nothing lasts forever…

'November Rain' by Guns N' Roses

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Back in Wednesday's bedroom, they both sat down on the big bed and Wednesday pulled out a bag of black and white makeup. Those were the only two colors; the foundation was white while the lipstick, eye shadow, and eyeliner were black. Joey looked at him with a 'keep-that-away-from-me' expression, but Wednesday offered him a charming smile and gently tugged him by the arm until their knees were touching.

"Now, you gotta hold still, okay? Don't flinch." Wednesday deftly uncapped the eyeliner and tried to position himself so he could get close enough to do it right. He sighed and pulled Joey into his lap, not noticing the blatant discomfort that flashed across Joey's face. He nodded. "Okay, this is better." With one hand gently holding the skin under Joey's eye taut, he smoothed the cream eyeliner on. "Look up," he instructed, and when Joey did, he finished up the first eye. Smirking to himself, he moved on to the second and repeated the process with admirable expertise.

"Does it look okay?" Joey asked hesitantly.

Wednesday put a finger to Joey's lips. "Shh. I'm not done yet." He held Joey's lids shut and dusted on the eye shadow, marveling at how amazing it looked. "Wow," he sighed, "You don't even need any foundation, you're so pale. Okay, almost finished…" He took special care with the lipstick and finally said, "Alright."

Joey looked at him and blinked at the unfamiliar heavy feeling of makeup. "Um… do I really want to see this?"

"You look fucking gorgeous," Wednesday said in awe. He handed Joey a mirror.

"Oh…" Joey gasped when he saw himself. "I look…" Dead.

"Great, huh?"

Wordless, Joey nodded. He put the mirror face-down on the bed and slid himself back off Wednesday's lap. No sooner had he done that than the lights flickered but didn't go off.

At the frightened look on Joey's face, Wednesday said, "I have some candles if that'll make you feel better. Why're you afraid of the dark?"

"It's not the dark," Joey whispered. It's people like you, he thought, that appear in the dark. That was what he'd been afraid of those two days ago, when he was walking, lost, in the woods. That seemed like such a long time past. He had been more worried about the creatures from horror movies: ghosts, ghouls, werewolves. The real-life monsters were a lot worse, though, he'd come to find out. "Will you light them?"

"Sure," Wednesday replied and went over to his dresser. He took out six black pillared candles and put them on the various hard surfaces around his room. With one match, even after the flame licked his hand, he lit all of them and extinguished the match between the pads of his fingers.

"Doesn't that hurt?" Joey asked, watching him.

"What?"

"The fire."

"Oh. No." Wednesday brought a candle over to the bed and took one of Joey's hands in his. He turned it palm-down and swiped it through the center of the flame. "See? Doesn't hurt."

Joey nodded and pulled his hand back. Despite the candles, he still cringed when the lights went out. While at first, Wednesday's presence had calmed him, it'd started to unnerve him with all the new information that his brain had ingested. He found himself moving back against the headboard when Wednesday returned from setting the candle on the dresser.

Wednesday noticed his unease and bent down over the edge of his bed. He reached underneath and came up with a small box that Joey prayed didn't hold anymore makeup. Instead of makeup, inside were neatly rolled pieces of paper that looked a whole lot like cigarettes. "Here," Wednesday said once he'd lit one up and taken a puff, "This'll make you calm down." He passed the joint to Joey, who hesitantly took it.

Joey didn't look very convinced, but he took a long draw anyway and immediately had a fit of coughing and gagging. It was horrible. His eyes watered with the pain in his lungs and he almost threw the joint back at Wednesday, who was desperately trying not to laugh. Joey scowled between coughs at the ease in which Wednesday inhaled and blew it out in a perfect stream of smoke. He shook his head when Wednesday offered it back to him.

"Don't try to drain it. Just take a nice, short breath," Wednesday instructed, already a bit woozy with the drug.

With a soft sigh, Joey did as he was told and found that it wasn't as bad. His next drag was longer and he managed to blow the smoke neatly out of his mouth instead of in big huffs from his nose. Wednesday held his hand out for the joint, but Joey wouldn't give it to him, so Wednesday lit up his own. The smoke gathered around the ceiling until both boys were dazed and relaxed, stretched out on their backs in the bed. Joey's eyes were half-lidded and he had forgotten about everything that'd been worrying him, while Wednesday was drowsily playing with one of his dreadlocks.

The sound of the rain was enhanced so much that it was the only sound Joey could hear; that and his heartbeat. The two noises seemed to run together, mesh until he couldn't tell them apart, and then separate again so he could distinguish them. His head lolled over to look at Wednesday, who had taken to staring up at the ceiling. Joey sniffled quietly and focused his attention on the ceiling as well. Shadows made by the candlelight danced across the walls, forming movies that neither Joey nor Wednesday understood, but they watched, entranced, nonetheless.

"Feel better?" Wednesday asked, but to Joey, his voice sounded detached… far away, somewhere above him.

"Uh huh," he replied, because it was true: he felt wonderful. He was floating on a moving cloud that seemed to pulse with life and blood, and his own blood was pounding in his ears. He felt the mattress shift as Wednesday moved closer to him and turned him around so that he was laying lengthwise on the bed. Wednesday settled down next to him and got close, until their bodies were touching, but Joey was too spaced-out to be bothered by it. In fact, he turned over on his side and pressed himself back against Wednesday's chest, wriggling until he was semi-comfortable. Wednesday draped an arm around him and put his hand on Joey's hip, where he gently rubbed his thumb back and forth. Joey sighed and pushed himself back more, though he couldn't really get much closer than he already was.

"If I could open myself up and let you in, I would, but you're about as close as you're gonna get," Wednesday finally said, tired of the way Joey was squirming against him. It was having a negative effect and he didn't want to have anything happen; he was trying to make Joey relax, after all.

Joey reached and took the hand on his hip and moved it around to his belly. He kept his hand over Wednesday's so the other boy couldn't move away and sighed as he was finally contented.

Wednesday smiled hazily. "Comfortable now?"

"Mmhmm," Joey sighed.

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Quite some time later, Joey came out of his daze and made a quiet noise when he saw the pitch darkness. The rain thundered on outside, but the candles Wednesday had lit were burned down and had gone out. Joey tightened his hand around Wednesday's, which was still settled comfortingly on his lower stomach. From the soft, even breathing behind him, Joey was sure that Wednesday was asleep. Any sensible person would have began plotting a way out of his predicament, but Joey was still too drugged to make sense of much of anything, except that it was dark and the dark was scary. He squeezed Wednesday's hand again and tugged on it, hoping to wake the other boy up.

After the fourth tug, Wednesday murmured, "Hm?" and sleepily pulled Joey closer to him.

"Wednesday," Joey said quietly. A few moments later, as he became more anxious, he said a bit louder, "Wednesday, wake up."

"What?" asked Wednesday groggily. "What's'matter?"

Joey blinked away the frightening images his mind conjured up for him because there was really nothing there; even if there was, it was too dark to be able to see it. "The candles went out," he said at last, but Wednesday was already back asleep. "Wednesday?" He sighed and yanked Wednesday's arm hard.

Wednesday sat straight up and groaned at the head rush. "Fucking Christ, what's wrong?"

"The candles burned out and it's dark."

"Is that all? Well, fuck, I can't do anything about it. I can't see my way around; there's not even a moon out." He lay back down on his back and sighed. "Just lay back and rest. There's nothing in the dark that isn't there in the light."

Joey turned over and got closer until he could feel Wednesday's sweet breath ghosting across his lips. "That's not true," he argued quietly.

Wednesday touched the side of Joey's face and caressed the skin above his left eye. "What can I do to make you relax?"

Joey didn't answer; he didn't know how to. He didn't know what he wanted, nor what would make him feel more comfortable in the presence of someone like Wednesday. His heartbeat sped when Wednesday's hand moved down to his cheek, then his neck, sliding down his chest like cold molasses. Maybe that was it: Wednesday was cold. Joey associated cold with dead, and therefore Wednesday was altogether frightening to him. His pants were opened with one hand while his own two clenched and unclenched in his hair as his muddled brain tried to make sense of what was happening. When that one cold hand closed around his quickly-forming erection, all thoughts flew from his mind as he focused on the tremors the action caused.

"Keep still," Wednesday said to the frantically wriggling boy. He pulled Joey closer and kissed him on the lips. Immediately, with no hesitation at all, it would seem, Joey's mouth opened and their tongues met for the second time. It was sweet, the kiss, Wednesday's surprisingly gentle touch, stroking and pulling and petting, rubbing the pad of his thumb over the small slit in the head of Joey's cock that oozed sticky white liquid so freely. The harder and faster Wednesday pumped him, the more intense the kiss became until they both had to pull back and pant to regain oxygen. Joey's erratic breathing wouldn't get under control, though, and still Wednesday was relentless in his touch. On the verge of hyperventilation, Joey moaned and tensed as he came in Wednesday's hand, then relaxed back onto the mattress.

Wednesday brought his hand to his mouth and licked the warm come off his fingers, making delicious slurping noises that made Joey blush. "You taste so fucking sweet," Wednesday said as he lapped the last of it away and began trailing kisses along Joey's neck. He bit down and sucked the skin up to leave a bruise right over the pulsing jugular that still hadn't slowed the heartbeat or blood flow that ran through it.

When Wednesday pulled away, Joey's eyes opened and just as he was about to question it, Wednesday had switched places with him. Joey found himself on his elbows between Wednesday's legs, and while he couldn't see, he could hear the other's pants being slid off. Nervously, he tugged his hair, unsure of what to do.

As though reading his mind, Wednesday yanked Joey down and said, "Suck me."

From where he was laying, he could feel the heat radiating from Wednesday's cock. His face scrunched with indecision, but in the end, since he did know how to do it and also didn't want to get on Wednesday's bad side, he brought his lips down and hesitantly tasted the tip. It was warm and spongy and just like he remembered his first lover's being, except the smell and taste were unique for each. He swirled his tongue around the head and ran it around the underside of the indentation that marked the mushroom-like cap. Wednesday didn't squirm or wriggle and hardly moved at all, which made Joey feel somewhat inadequate. It got to the point where he pulled away and had to ask if he was doing alright.

"Beautiful," Wednesday breathed. Joey smiled before going back down. While he tried and made a marvelous attempt, he couldn't quite get all of Wednesday's length into his mouth. He settled on wrapping his hand around the base and jerking it in hard, quick motions, while his mouth and tongue worked the very tip, where precome was beginning to leak. His tongue swiped through the liquid and he sighed at the heady taste.

Wednesday sighed, too, at feeling something he'd only ever imagined. He didn't moan or scream out profanities when he came, just exhaled a deep, shuddering breath and trembled slightly in the aftermath of his orgasm. He didn't even say anything when Joey choked on the stream of come that had shot into his mouth and discreetly wiped some of it off his chin and onto the blanket. Joey frowned and crawled up Wednesday's chest until they were, he guessed from the warm gusts of breath, face-to-face. Joey wished he could see his facial expression because that would show him whether or not Wednesday was angry with him for not swallowing it all.

"Was that okay?" Joey asked nervously.

Wednesday guided Joey down and kissed him, long and lingering as he savored the taste of himself. "That was perfect," he said, voice quiet and depleted. "Now, why don't you close your eyes and get some rest?"

Come to think of it, Joey thought with a yawn, he was tired. He nuzzled his face into the hollow of Wednesday's neck and, as Wednesday pulled the blanket up over them and entwined him in both his strong arms, the darkness was forgotten. Joey closed his eyes, rubbed his forehead against Wednesday's jaw while his back was tenderly stroked, and he slept.

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All I hear is human noise
You make your own fucking choice
I belong to only me
Silence for my revelry

I can only die over time
Filthy hands stay away from mine
Every reason is a right to hate
Painful clutch - death is fine, gimme mine

Only one of us walks away

'Only One' by SlipKnot

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Close Your Eyes and Settle