Jesse's Adventures | By : Neckar Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > Jesse McCartney Views: 2999 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know Jesse McCartney. I do not make any money from the writing of this story. |
FOR THE FIRST TIME ANYWHERE: COMING SOON!!!!
At an ancient phone exhibit, Jeremy and Jesse sit in Time Lord robes. Jesse picks up the phone, “It works. Hey ever crank call a Time Lord?”
Jesse: (on phone): Hey, is Myassamacallitallpurplezitsthere?”
Old Time Lord: Hang on I’ll check for Myass…”
Jeremy and Jesse laugh.
Mr Finch and the Doctor battling in the TARDIS console room, exploding console. The doors open and they both fall out into space as asteroids pass by and ignite!
In the past: Jeremy: “You’re Galahad?!”
Galahad: “You can call me Kid Galahad, for I’m just a kid.”
Jesse: “Doctor!”
Jeremy: “It’s a Black Knight!”
Doctor: “Not just that, it’s a Black Knight with a black hole in it! A Black Hole Knight or a Black Knight Hole!”
Jesse is pulled into a black hole on the Black Knight’s chest. Lancelot holds onto him but his feet go up and Lancelot is pulled with Jesse toward the black hole.
“Oh yeah, you wanna see moves, I’ll show you moves!” The Doctor pilots the TARDIS with open doors infront of the pulled Lance and Jesse and the two fly into the TARDIS but…as doors close…
The TARDIS is pulled into a black hole. A cow passes by it. At the scanne, the Dragon from Eragon snaps open it’s jaws at them. Jesse flinches and backs away, puts an arm up to protect himself.
Doctor: “Allow me to introduce King Arthur.”
Jesse: “Sir Lancelot, I presume!”
Jesse: “Doctor, dragon!”
Doctor: “Run!” (a dragon comes flying and the pair run from it and from Knights of the Round Table)
“Draw!” (in the Old West)
Doctor: “I will not draw.”
Young gun slinger: “You killed my father!”
Jeremy looks at the Doctor.
Businessman and ranger: That thing has all the weapons in it we need. (points to the TARDIS which is on a wagon).
Jeremy: “Jesse’s inside the TARDIS and time’s moving differently for him?”
Doctor: “Yeah, don’t worry. He’s safe.”
TARDIS on the wagon is being hauled off by two fast moving horses. Jeremy jumps between the horses from the platform.
Jeremy: “Doctor!”
The wagon is running straight at a covered wagon.
Long haired blond Robin of Loxley: “I’m Robin of the Hood.”
Jeremy: “Robin Hood!”
Long haired brunette Robin: “I’m Robin of the Hood!”
Doctor: “Hoods!”
Jeremy says, “Gosh, two Robin Hoods. Will you help us rescue Jesse from King John?”
Blond Robin: “Only if he shoots an apple off your head…”
Brunette Robin: I want you to shoot an apple off your friend’s head…
Doctor: Posh, that’s easy…
“Blindfolded…”
The Doctor pulls the arrow across the bow. He’s blindfolded by Little John. Jeremy blinks, looks scared.
“William Tell taught me how to do this, but not for a few good number of years yet…”
King John (to Jesse): Robin has his Maid Marion and all his men, I want my own Maid Marion.
Jesse: What’s that to do with me?
King John: You will be my Maid Marion…
Jesse: Why it is always me?
Jeremy: You’re just too pretty.
Jeremy: What’s that?”
Doctor: I think it’s Godzilla! C’mon run!
Jesse: So we’re in a parallel Earth in the same time where Godzilla, Gamera and Gorgo and all the rest are real?
Doctor: Now you’ve got it. Come on help me with this! I don’t think I can do it. I don’t think I can recalibrate all the UNIT trucks without help…
Jesse: Help from whom?”
Doctor: Me. I think I need all of my other selves, hey if the Time Lords could do it, and they’re not around any more so why can’t I?
Jesse: You sound like Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz.
Doctor: Nice girl, she was.
TARDIS appears. A Chinese Doctor walks out (Jackie Chan): I am the Doctor, I will help you.
Another Doctor comes to them (Jet Li). “It’s my old enemy, Rodak!” He’s on the UFO fighter SID where Rodak has set up a secret base.
Rodak: The giant monsters I have control of this time will destroy the entire Earth!
Bessie drives up to a UNIT truck. The Brigidier comes out. The Third Doctor jumps out of the car, “Hello, Lethbridge Steward! Say hello the Brigidier, Jo.”
Jo Grant: Hi!
Brig: Doctor! Is there anything I can do?
Third Doctor: Reverse the polarity of the Neutron Flow.
Second Doctor: “Now Jamie! When I say run run!”
Fifth Doctor: Focus, we have to focus. Brave heart!
Fourth Doctor: That’s a great big whomping lizard!
Sarah: Doctor, stop acting childish.
Fourth Doctor: What’s the point of being 479 if I can’t act childish! Besides, I wasn’t acting childish, was I? Me?
Jeremy whispers something in Adric’s ear.
Doctor: No, Jeremy, you can’t do that!
Jeremy: Already done.
Sixth Doctor looking at himself in the reflection of a truck gun set up, “Oh, this is still the best face…me ever had.”
Jesse: Doctor, we’re black and white, what’s with that?”
“Run!” A rhedosaur destroys a lighthouse.
Doctor: We’re in some black and white universe where the monsters or Ray Harryhausen movies are alive!
An octopus pulls down San Franciso bridge. UFO flying saucers attack Washington DC’s monuments.
TARDIS leaves but when they exit on a beach, a giant Cyclops and blue dragon fight each other close by.
Doctor: We’re still in the same universe…RUN!
“I’m Sinbad.”
Jesse: And a fucking hunk too.
“My name’s Jason. I have found the Golden Fleece but need your help in getting it back to Greece.”
Doctor “We’re in another universe. In this universe, particles allow you Earthlings to be like superheroes!”
Jesse is in a yellow cape, yellow speedo, yellow boots and a yellow eye mask, nothing more. “I get my energy from the sunlight. I am Dayoman!”
Jeremy: More like Gay-o-man.”
Jesse: Huh?
Doctor: “17th Century Japan…I have some loose ends to take care of here…”
The trio run from Samurai warriors only to run into some more. They are caught between the two warring parties.
Aoi: (look of evil on face and raising sword above Jeremy and Jesse) your new friends, Doctor, will you care for them as well as you did for me?”
Doctor: NO!
Doctor: “I have to find out if he’s possessed by the energy or not and there;s only one way for me to to that.”
Jesse: “To make love to him?”
Doctor: Yes.
Jeremy: You can’t! He’ll kill you!
Aoi: Prepare to die, Doctor!
Doctor: Love kills…
Doctor: Tiny aliens on the Titanic are trying to find their miniature ship inside a safe…if they don’t find it, the whole world could end in your time…
Doctor: This thing, this separatist Auton, is at a wedding…
Jeremy: My cousin’s…
Doctor: I don’t do weddings…
Jesse: Tough, you’re going…
Jeremy: Doctor, it seems assimulated into our culture…do you have to kill it?
Doctor points a laser rifle at the human Auton, “I must…”
Auton: Doctor, I beg you, spare my life!
In alternate Ancient Greece: Doctor: May I introduce Xena, Warrior Princess…
Xena: My son’s back, or rather returned or rather come here from another universe to take revenge on what he thinks is his bad mother…
Solan: Fight or die…
Jeremy: Then I will fight…
Solan: And kill…
In Ancient Rome: Dressed in flimsy gladiator gear with spikes on neck collar, Jeremy: “Jesse, be careful, that’s Caligula…”
Jesse: Yeah and we’re gladiators … (Jeremy jumps between gladiator boys and Jesse, who’s been knocked down)
Jeremy is outnumbered. Adam comes jumping into the arena.
Jeremy: Adam, you’re back!
Adam: Hello, Jeremy…nice outfit…
Caligula: (to a nude Jesse): I want you to have me…
Doctor: He’s mad..or is he? Possessed by some alien force that got to him when he prayed to it…
Jeremy: He thinks he’s a god…
Doctor: If what I think is going on…he’s right, he is…
Caligula: I shall kill the Doctor before you all and bring him back to life… (in a theatre)
Present day Grand Canyon, Doctor: This is 2008 and this is my old friend Kiko McGree Redwing. He’s a doctor…
Jesse: Oh no, not another one…
Kiko: No, I’m a former traveling companion of the Doctor, not a Doctor. A medical doctor… Doctor, I think those bat things are back…
Doctor: Oh no, not the Roptera…maybe the Menoptera can help us again!
Maine: Butterfly beings fly by—the Doctor waves at them and smiles.
Bat monster men attack Jesse and Jeremy at a wooden cabin in the woods. The Sixth Doctor comes out and uses a device to make them leave, a sonic sound gun. “I knew you’d need my help.”
Jeremy: Sure did.
Doctor: Did not.
Jesse: Did too, now thank the man in the Throw Up coat…
Doctor: We have to leave, right now!
Jesse: Why? I like it here.
Doctor: We’re in Sodom of Sodom and Gomarrah…
Jesse: oh.
Jeremy: Don’t forget to not look back…
Huge explosion! TARDIS seems to turn to salt.
Doctor: we’re on a planet of giants…
Valerie: Really? Why didn’t you tell us that?
Doctor: And my TARDIS has been driven away on the back of a truck…not that that hasn’t happened before…only not as garbage…
Jesse: Well, shoulda nicked a new one while we were on Gallifrey…
Jeremy: You’re gonna leave those seven people and their dog stuck on that land of giants?
Doctor: I have to. I can’t interfere with history and it’s vital that they remain there.
A cat and dog fight over Jeremy, Jesse, and the Doctor.
Doctor: I have a mission for you two.
Jesse: What is it?
Doctor: Get the two girls, Bodicca’s daughters to leave with you.
Jeremy and Jesse: Yuck.
Jesse: And what’re you gonna do?
Doctor: try to stop their mom from killing herself…
Bodicca attacks the Doctor with a sword. The Doctor points the sonic screwdriver at the sword. It melts.
“Let me die honorably!”
“No such thing!”
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