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I'll save you from yourself	By : PunkyEmoFreak Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > Tokio Hotel Views: 2243 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know the members of Tokio Hotel. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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|| Bill’s POV ||

I hardly ever see Tom anymore, not that I really saw him much to begin with, but I knew for a fact that at least for an hour and a half every single day I was going to see him in group. But for reasons unknown to me, Tom was no longer in our group class. The first day I didn’t see him, I thought he was gone. I know I had seen him that morning when I woke up, he was still sleeping. I left before I could get on his bad side first thing in the morning. I couldn’t remember seeing him at breakfast, and when group came around and he wasn’t in there- and Georg way, I really thought he had left. But I saw him for only a moment at lunch after that, so I knew he was still there.

“Hey Georg,” I said, sitting down next to him in group about two weeks after Tom had been out of our class, I was giving him a smile that I knew would make him weak at the knees like it did to everyone to extract the information I so desperately wanted from this boy. Ever since Tom left, group was a lot more relaxed, we didn’t all sit in the same spots anymore, but rather moved around to our hearts content. I had asked Lacy about it and she told me that Tom was the one who never really changed where he sat, and everyone else just fell accordingly to him because he didn’t like too much change. It made him more on the edge and everyone in group just liked to keep a happy Tom.

“Hey Bill…” Georg said, I could hear his voice was a little unsure. I was sitting in Tom’s old chair- for some reason, even though we all move around now, we tend to avoid this seat. As though Tom is going to come back and want it. But Lacy told us that Tom was not going to be coming back to this group for a while, if ever. But she wouldn’t tell anyone what happened to him. Or with him for that matter. “What’s up?” Georg asked me, breaking my thoughts away from his dreadlocked best friend for a moment only to remember I was talking to him to find out more about him.

“I have a question,” I told him, and I saw the way Georg shivered when he looked at me again. I had him, I knew I did. He didn’t respond, so I just continued anyways, my finger latching themselves to a bit of his hair and tugging softly in a flirting manner, “I know that you know why Tom isn’t in our group class anymore.” I told him, he flinched a little and tried to look away, I only tugged on his hair a little harder to make him look at me again, “I just want to know why…”

Georg bit on his lip and looked around, Lacy wasn’t in here yet, he couldn’t use her to save himself from answering the question. “Look, Bill…” He said softly, sighing a bit. “It’s really not any of my business to tell you,” I gave him a small pout and he bit down hard on his lip, “Lacy just moved him to a private counseling class now. He was in one a few years ago, but they gave up on him. Lacy thinks it could help. And it is helping a bit, but not because he’s alone. He still wont give her a second glance, but he’s not so edgy anymore. He’s back to how he was before you came here. He’s away from you, Bill. And it helps him a lot.”

I frowned at his last addition to my question and I let my hand fall from his hair and onto my lap. Tom really hated me that much that Lacy pulled him out of group because of me? That didn’t seem fair. I don’t like the twins at all and I’m still in here. “Why?” I asked him, frowning even more, “Georg, what did I do so bad that makes him hate me so much?” I asked, looking back up now, “I don’t get it… I only want to get to know him. You are able to be close to him, what makes us so different?”

“Well, first of all, I’m not in his room.” Georg pointed out, “His room used to be somewhere where he could go to get away from everyone and everything. Tom dreads going in there at night now, given the choice between the rec room and his room, he used to choose his room one hundred percent of the time. But you’ve taken over half of it, you’ve taken over the one place that was his. I think it was the only place that has ever been his. As long as I’ve been here, Tom never had a roommate, but I was told that Rick was his roommate when he first got here. Rick asked for a room change after the first night, he claimed Tom gave him the creeps and he seriously thought that he was going to be murdered in his sleep. Rick had acute paranoia though, so it wasn’t taken seriously. But they got him a new room anyways, that’s why he’s with Andreas now. It just works that way. Tom alone has always worked and you changed that.”

I looked up; I couldn’t bring myself to talk. And I knew Georg couldn’t bring himself to stop talking, the look of hurt on my face seemed to give him a happy gleam in his eyes that I didn’t like in the least bit. And from what I’ve realized, Georg likes to talk. A lot. “You see, now he always goes to the rec room and on the days where you show up there, he gives me this look that I knows means he wants the fuck out of there. Simply because you’re in there. I know so much about him, Bill. So much I couldn’t even try to explain things to you. I know things you can only know by spending time with him, by him letting himself be, well, more himself around you. And that is something you will never get, Bill. He doesn’t like you. You could even say he hates you. So if I were you, I would just back away from him. Don’t look at him, don’t try to talk to him, keep all your things away from his things, act like you don’t exist around him. Maybe he won’t hate you so much.”

I was still for a moment longer when Georg stopped talking; I don’t know why he was being so mean to me. Saying things like that, Georg had never been so mean to me before. When I saw Lacy coming into the room, I instantly got up and moved to the only other free chair around the room- the one next to hers, and sat there. For the first time ever, I didn’t pay attention in group. I didn’t say a word. When it ended, I saw Georg give me a smirk before walking out of the room with everyone else. I stood up and Lacy touched my shoulder.

“Bill, you were awfully quiet today. Is something wrong?” I looked over at her, concern written over her face, I nodded at her. At times, Lacy reminded me of my mom back home. I may have hid things from my mom and acted like a complete brat to her, and I was mad when she thought it was a good idea to come here, but I loved my mom with everything I had. “Do you want to talk about it?” I nodded and sat back down. “Go ahead,” she told me and I bit down on my lip to try and put my thoughts into words.

“Well… really, it’s… I don’t wanna get this person in trouble…” I said softly, as much as I didn’t like Georg right now, it might upset Tom if he got in trouble, Lacy promised me he wouldn’t be in trouble. I nodded, “Before you came in here I was talking to Georg…” I started, twisting my shirt nervously in my hand as I spoke and told her what Georg was telling me. She was patient, quiet as I rambled on. “And the thing is, I don’t know why Georg seemed so happy to tell me all that. To make me hurt because Tom doesn’t like me.” I frowned.

“Bill, don’t let what Georg told you or how he told it to you get you so upset. Yes, he wasn’t lying when he told you that one of the reasons Tom isn’t in this class anymore is because of you. Tom has a hard time adjusting to new things, new people. You’re really different from everyone else in here, and it frightens him. Georg was a god-send here for Tom. He needed someone and Georg is that person. Tom is very anti-social, as you can tell. But you must not worry so much about it.”

“Why did he seem so happy about it all though?” I asked, sighing a little bit. I couldn’t deny that Lacy was making me feel a little better, if not still confused. “Why does Tom trust him so much? I don’t get it.”

“Tom trusts Georg because Georg never asks for anything from him. He doesn’t ask for a response from a question, he just talks and Tom just listens. Georg was able to pick up on things quickly about Tom, and it all worked for him.” She told me, well… it made sense, even if I didn’t like it, “And Georg, he seems happy whenever Tom doesn’t like someone new because Georg is in love with him.” My eyes widened at her and she nodded, “Yes, Georg is in love with Tom. And the longer and more Tom doesn’t like others, Georg believes he’ll have more of a chance with him. What Georg doesn’t realize is that Tom won’t ever love him. Georg made the mistake of becoming his friend, and the only person he can trust. Tom can’t love him because it would ruin everything for Tom.”

I smiled, it made me feel better, and I understood a lot more. “Thanks, Lacy.” I told her as I got up from my chair. I leaned over and gave her a kiss on the cheek. “You remind me of my mom. She’s a great person, and always knew how to make me feel better.” Lacy just smiled at me as I walked out of the classroom.

“I know you’re awake, Tom.” I said as I walked into our room and Tom was lying in his bed, his back towards my own and his eyes shut. But I knew he was awake. Tom looks different when he sleeps; his breathing is much more shallow. He’s much less tense. He seems… happy in his sleep. “I don’t expect you to say anything, but I know you can hear me.” He didn’t move, “And I’m going to talk weather or not you like it, because you will listen, because I know you wont say anything to me.” I had made a decision- more of a plan, during my own free hour today when I was in the art room with Andreas.

I was going to make Tom fall in love with me. We weren’t ever going to be friends, and I knew that much to be true. But that worked to my advantage after everything Lacy told me. Tom won’t ever be in love with his friends. I don’t know why I want to make Tom fall in love with me, since all I really want from him is sex, but I’m going to do it. “You don’t like me.” I said, and I saw the way his shoulder moved a bit, he was agreeing with that. “I’m different then anyone else here, I tried to make you talk and you didn’t even try to hit me, so I know you think I’m different.”

He still didn’t move, that was okay right now. He would eventually. “You’re a brat, Tom. And I really can’t say it’s for no reason, since I don’t know anything about you really. I don’t know why you’re here, I don’t know what made you stop talking, I don’t know anything. And unless you do start talking, I’m never going to know anything. And I’m sure that’s the way you want to keep it.” He rolled over a bit now, turning and facing me. I smiled, I’m getting somewhere with him. He was looking at me, even if it was with hate.

“I don’t doubt that I will never understand you. Even though I want too…” I trailed off for a moment, sighing before looking at him again. This might be a low blow towards Georg… but if it worked to my advantage, then so be it. He was an ass to me anyways, “I mean, I know I wont ever be in love with you like Georg is, but I don’t see why that means I can’t get to know you too.” His eyes widened and I inwardly grinned, he didn’t realize Georg was in love with him. I just gave him a confused look though, as though I didn’t know why he looked so surprised, “Never mind, I suppose. Night, Tomi.” I said softly, pulling off my shirt and crawling under my covers.

I felt Tom’s eyes on my for some time after that, as though trying to read if what I told him was true or not. And if my guesses were correct, Tom wasn’t going to be spending too much time with Georg alone anymore. And if he does, well, I know Georg isn’t going to get the same reactions from Tom as he used.

It was a win-win game on my part. Tom had a deep-set hate for everyone in this place but Georg, and since we share a room, he’s going to be stuck with me more then he is the others. Especially if he gets pissy and messes up and gets stuck in our room- hopefully our room rather then lockdown that is. I just hope that much at least.

After awhile, I heard Tom shuffling around in his bed and my guess is to try and sleep. Though before I fell asleep, I never heard his calm breathing patterns. I realized though, I do know things about Tom that Georg doesn’t, I know the Tom who’s away from him, I know the Tom in his sleep. I think I’m the only one who has ever really seen him smile, a real happy smile. He only does that while he sleeps.

I’ll get to know Tom like Georg does. It’ll take time, but it will happen.
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I'll save you from yourself