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I Am the Way...	By : mychemicalresurrection Category: My Chemical Romance > General Views: 1369 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know the members of My Chemical Romance. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Disclaimer: I do not know Gerard Way or his band of lofflies. If I did I’m sure I would be more accurate with my fictitious renderings of his personality. This a work of pure fiction, not intended to hurt or make any characters therein infamous. The follow indicates no expression of the members of the band and is in no way supported. Thankee for reading~

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~Have You Heard the News That You’re Dead?~

My body was my own again when I opened my eyes. I went to rub my eyes and gasped at the pain in my knuckles as my fingers moved. What had happened to me hours and hours ago came back in a sudden flash. Grimacing in shame, I opened the curtain to my bunk and looked out. It was dark. The clock on the microwave not far away flashed midnight. I forgot whether or not it was blinking the actual time or whether someone had actually set it.

No one seemed to be about, though the television was still going in the room at the back of the bus was clearly on. I was happy no one could see me in this condition; still stained with myself and my hands practically covered in dried blood. What would they say? ‘Gerard, stop beating yourself up for attention’? I shook my head and sighed as I went into the bathroom and started gingerly removing my clothes.

I felt so ashamed for having to turn my clothes over so the blood and cum wouldn’t show, but what else could I do while I was in here? We didn’t exactly have a cozy little clothes basket the we shared.

I started the shower and climbed in once the water was hot, leaning with my back to the wall, I closed my eyes and wished I could disappear. The dried blood cracked and flaked off of the stitches in my knuckles. Luckily, only a few of them had been pulled to the point that they cut my hand open more. As my confused emotions and shame overtook me, I couldn’t help but cry as I looked down at the sorry state of my hands, my body, myself. I was so disgusting.

“Shh… Gerard, how do you think up such terrible lies?”

I ignored the Patient, though I started trembling from the fear that he would control me again and sobbed harder. The water was comforting somehow, like a blanket of warmth over my pained soul. I turned the cold down until the water scalded me. Slowly, my back, chest, arms, face… everything went completely and blissfully numb. I sighed heavily.

A sound like the heavy trickle of water sounded outside the shower stall and made me flinch with paranoia until I realized it was just someone using the bathroom. We had a policy on the bus that you didn’t lock the bathroom just in case someone had to run in. It got a bit annoying sometimes when one of the guys ate something that didn’t agree, but I took this opportunity to peek out. It was Mikey. Why, oh why did it have to be Mikey of all people?

He finished urinating and, thankfully, didn’t flush. I stared up at the ceiling, listening. He didn’t leave immediately. I heard him mumble something along the lines of, “How are your hands feeling?”

Looking at them again, I replied flatly, “They hurt…”

“They should, you completely shattered the mirror in here. We had to have someone come in and paid out of the ass to have another put in before you got out of the hospital,” he replied, putting the lid to the toilet down and taking a seat there. “Wh-…” he paused a second, “why did you kiss me in front of the paparazzi, Ger?”

Cutting the water, I reached out and grabbed the towel beside the shower stall and pulled it inside to start drying myself. I sighed heavily, toweling my white hair, “Honestly, you wouldn’t believe me if I even tried to tell you…”

I could feel Mike’s tension as he was silent a moment. “You… you don’t… y’know? Like me that way or anything do you? Because that’s incest… and I don’t think the media or our fans are going to like it if we’re incestuous, Ger… I mean, you can still like men if you want, but… just…”

I groaned slightly. He still hadn’t let that kiss with Bert slide had he? Even with our two bands pretty much ex-communicate, he couldn’t let go that I was bisexual. How many millions of our fans had seen that kiss? How many would see this one.

“Mike, you know I love you as a brother… and you know I find it completely disgusting to kiss you…”

“Then why did you do it?” he asked, the innocence and trust in his voice. I was his brother. Somehow, I know he looked up to me. Even if it was in the minutest way, I knew he trusted me.

I wrapped the towel around my waist and opened the shower curtain. The black towel contrasted starkly with my pale skin. My brother looked a bit afraid as he stared at me, as if he didn’t know what I was planning next. I didn’t know what the Patient had planned.

I shook my head and gave the most guiltless look I could muster in an attempt to convince him as I said, “I didn’t do it, Mikey… I wouldn’t do that… you know it…”

Mikey gave me the once-over and sighed. “I think we should have left you in that hospital longer, bro… just don’t go kissing me again and I think I can be okay with whatever else you do to yourself…”

“Oh, we won’t kiss him this time, will we Gerard?”
“Shut up. Leave me alone,” I hissed.

“What did you say?” my brother asked, quirking a brow.

I could feel a chilled feeling seeping into my vocal chords and lips and face. I grabbed my throat and doubled over, the towel falling away.

“Run- Mike- ru- way-“ I gasped, trying not to give over to the Patient. Mike looked bewildered and stood.

“What’s happening, Gerard? I can help you! Just tell me,” he said, coming to me, his thin hand on my shoulders. He looked into my eyes begging for an answer.

“No- Mike- please- run,” my voice was growing croakier like that of the Patient.

My sweet brother looked from me to the door and back as if weighing whether or not he could deal with me going into some psychotic fit. Instead of running, he called out, “Bob! Hey! Something’s happening to Ger-“

I felt my hands tighten around his porcelain throat, but couldn’t stop them. He owned me now. The phantom had taken my free will away again as he forced my baby brother into the wall of the bus and grinned at him sadistically. “Hello, Michael…”

Mikey gasped for air, his eyes agape at me. I was crying on the inside, fighting my way through. The clouded vision I could see. I could feel the tears running down my cheeks as he continued to choke Mikey. With a growl and a lurch, I reclaimed my body and let him go, sprawling to the ground.

He coughed, falling beside me, as I curled into a ball and sobbed into my hands. Holding his neck, he looked over to the pitiful mass of flesh that was me. “Michael… I’m so sorry… P-please…” I reached out to him with one battered hand. “… oh, god… I’m so sorry…”

Through the pieces of dark brown hair that canvassed his blushing face, my brother had tears filling his eyes. A light of understanding passed through them for a second as he hiccupped, “Gerard…”

At that moment, Bob, Ray, and Frank burst through the door and looked at the two of us; Mikey on all fours with all of his clothes on, holding his neck and breathing hard, I laying in a curled up fetal position, completely naked, crying so hard that I couldn’t even see. I don’t know what they thought. I didn’t care. This wasn’t my fault.

“Mikey… please… I’m so sorry… wasn’t… me… the Patient…” I sobbed, biting my bottom lip as I said it. I reached to the other guys with the same desperation for which I reached to my brother minutes ago. Bob, who I knew could beat me into a pulp if I even tried to touch him, came over and knelt beside me and grasped my hand. I gripped his calloused hand back so hard that the stitches in my knuckles bled more.

“Damn, Gerard,” he cursed, pulling the towel over to me and throwing it over my nakedness. He somehow developed the strength to heave me up to my feet, which couldn’t hold my weight had I wanted them to. Ray rushed over and took my other shoulder. Between the two of them, they dragged me out of the bathroom.

Behind me, I heard Mikey choking out the story to Frank in a strained voice. “That isn’t my brother… he didn’t do it… there’s something inside of him…”
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I Am the Way...