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The One I Love	By : TenshiNoReyire Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > HIM Views: 2393 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know the members of HIM. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 6
- 7
- 8
A/N: The name Jan is pronounced Yohn.

Ville sighed happily, leaning back against the headboard of the bed. A man leaned over and kissed him on the cheek.

"You like it, don't you sweetheart?" he murmered in Ville's ear, each word an enchanting melody ensnaring him.

"Mmm, yes, Jan, I do."

"I knew you would like herion." Jan took the syringe away from Ville and placed it in a box and then wrapped his arms around Ville.

"Good thing we won all that money from the casino downstairs, eh, doll?" smiled Ville.

"It's cause you're my lucky boy." Jan smiled back, watching Ville's face as his hand drifted down into Ville's lap.

Ville only moaned, lying his head on Jan's shoulder. Could life get much better then this? A beautiful boyfriend, drugs, drinking, and tons of money? Definatly not. As everything began to fade to black, part of him remembered when he didn't care about those things.

Ville had met Jan one night while he was getting wasted at a bar. Probably because at that time in his life, not only was he struggling with his sexuality, but what people would think of him. He laughed bitterly, thinking of all the fangirls that would be happy. He didn't notice as a gorgeous twenty year old boy sat down next to him. He had long, curly brown hair that ended right above his shoulders and piercing blue eyes.

"Hi."

"Hey."

"Aren't you...nah you can't be."

"Ville Valo? Sorry to say, I am."

"Oh wow! I'm Jan."

"Jan?"

"Yeah, it's a german name, spelled J-A-N."

"Well, nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Valo."

Ville woke up after a night of binging with Jan, face down on the floor. With a pounding head, he sat up, cringing. His stomach tossed as his fuzzy memory tried to remember where he was.

"Jan," he called, weakly gripping the bed to pull himself up. "Where the fuck are you?" He fell down again and managed to pull himself into the bathroom before he vomited. Clutching his now empty stomach, he lay down on the floor. "Fucking hell..." he moaned before passing out.

God knows how long later, he woke up again. He was still sick, but able to get up and stumble to the bed. When his vision cleared, he looked around the room. A various assortment of drugs were scattered across tables and the floor. His wallet lay open on the beside table. All of his money and credit cards were gone. Though the credit cards were worthless since he had maxed them out at the casinos in town. Stacks upon stacks of beer bottles, cigarette butts and food were everywhere. There were so many stains on the carpet, Ville ceased to remember what they were...and him and Jan had only been staying there two weeks. Two weeks at a cheap motel because Jan's cousin ran it. It was the motel where all the whores took their customers.

Ville hadn't seen his friends, his family, his band for months...finally everything sank in.

Jan was gone. And all Jan had left him was a broken heart, an addiction to drugs and alchol, a fucked up life, and a shitload of debts.

There was no way this was happening. Not now. Not so soon after Jan had left him. This wasn't good. Not at all. No way. There was no brighter side to this story. And there probably never would be.

"I can't believe this."; "You've gotta be kidding me!"; "And I thought you were completly trustworthy."; and "Wait until everyone else finds out." were just a few of the things said when they all found him here. Like this. So....trashed.

You're worthless. You're nothing. You Never were anything. And never will be. No one cares about you and you know it. Everyone that ever meant anything to you has left. And it's your fault. Ville's thoughts were all like this now. After they found him like this, he couldn't help the thoughts from coming to mind. He watched them each slowly walk away. Out of the room. .....Out of his life. "No." He whispered, barely able to hear himself, "Don't leave! Please! I can stop! I can go back to how I was before!" He knew it wasn't true, but he had to try and get them to stay. Even if only for a little while longer.

Bam stirred a little before slowly coming to. He wasn't exactly sure why he woke up, but he had the feeling that something wasn't right. He blinked a few times, waiting for his eyes to adjust before sitting up, saying still for a moment. He frowned. Was that Ville? ......Who's he talking to?

With that in mind, Bam got out of bed and slowly made his way into the living room, where the...voice, yes, single voice was coming from. He stood in the doorway for a moment, trying to figure out just where in the hell Ville was. He shrugged and moved farther into the room, only to find Ville on the floor next to the couch. What the hell? Bam shook his head and walked around to the front of the couch. He knealt down next to Ville and just...watched him for a moment.

Bam couldn't understand any of the Finnish man's mutterings, as...about half of them were in Finnish, but it was interesting to watch him. After a few minutes of that, Bam decided to go ahead and wake him, since...the dream was obviously not good. "Ville..." He shook the vocalist a little. "Ville, wake up."

No.....They're still leaving. Why? Can't they at least give me another chance? Ville thought, watching them all continue to talk away. "Please! Just give me another chance! I'll stop! I prom..."

Linde's wife, Alessandra, who had randomly been with the gang today, turned around. "Promise? Is that what you're going to say?" She waited for a moment. "Well....go on. Say it."

"I pro....I prom....I promise......" Ville's eyes were filled with tears as he watched them all turn away again. "No...please. I'll do it. If I know you all are behind me....I can do it. I can stop. I know I can." And it wasn't a lie. If they would just stay.... "I never did....make a New Year's resolution...right?"

Not a single one of his band mates--his friends--listened to him at all.

Friends....right. "Through thick and thin, until the end", right? So much for that... Ville thought, painfully watching them walk right out of his life forever. Tears streaming down his cheeks all the while, I'm an idiot. A fucking idiot. "Please!"

Bam shook him again. "Ville..."

Bam jumped when Ville sat up quickly, shouting. "Don't leave me!"

His blue eyes widened. "I....I won't.." Bam said, confused about his friend's sudden outburst.

Ville looked around the room quickly, before his eyes landed on Bam for the first time since he'd sat up. "Bam..." He touched the skater's cheek for a very brief moment with his fingertips before, with both hands, he grabbed Bam's sleeve on his shirt at the shoulder, clinging to him, leaning into his friend, quietly crying.

"Ville...Ville...what's wrong?" Bam rolled his eyes at himself. Oh, yeah. Way to go.

The only response he got was a choked out, "Don't leave me, Bam...."

"I...I won't. I could never do that. I never will. I promise."

"No!" Ville hit him weakly in the chest. "No. Don't promise me anything! Promises....are always broken...."

"No." Bam shook his head, "I could never break a promise to you, Ville."

Ville shook his head, "I-I don't care. Don't promise. Never promise me anything, Bam."

Bam was confused beyond belief over all of this, but decided to just go with it, even though it didn't seem to make much sense. "Ok....I won't promise you anything...."

"Tell me you won't leave me, Bam..." Ville said, his voice going out every so often due to the crying.

"I won't. I....I won't ever do that, Ville."

Ville shook his head, "No...." He looked up at Bam, "Tell me you won't leave me, Bam!"

"I couldn't never--"

"No!" He shouted, earning a wince from Bam. Ville put his hands on either side of Bam's face, looking him directly in the eyes. "Bam. Listen. To what I'm saying...." Tears were streaming down his cheeks now. "Tell me....you won't leave me....."

Bam nodded, understanding this time. "Ville....I won't leave you. Ever. I....I could never leave you...." Bam bit down on his lower lip, feeling his own tears starting to come. I love you too much to do that to you, Ville...

Ville nodded, falling back into his friend. You better not.....you're all I've got left, Bam....you're all I have left....
- 6
- 7
- 8
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The One I Love