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(Promise to) Keep Your Heart Broken	By : ceeceebullet Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > Rasmus Views: 975 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know the members of Rasmus. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 6
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Chapter 7

xx Skylar

I was so nervous about you finding out about our child. I had told myself that you would never know. I knew it would destroy your career. And I was positive that if you did find out you'd deny it to be true, call me a liar, and sue me for everything you could. But you weren't like that, Lauri. You seemed…thrilled of the idea of becoming a father.

"I'm going to be a Dad," you said with joy in your voice. You picked me up and spun me around my kitchen. I squealed as you stopped and lowered me to the floor.
"It's true," I said and smiled. "I'm debating if I want to find out the sex or not," I said to you. "I'm not sure yet."
"Wait," you had said. "Let's wait until it's born to find out," you said taking my hands in yours.
"But I'm kinda anxious to know," I said.
"So am I but its better this way," you said. "A nice, happy surprise."
"Perhaps," I said. I went to the coffee machine and poured us a cup. Sitting down at the table with you we sat and talked.
"I think you should come to Finland with me," you said. I gasped.
"Why?"
"Because," you started pausing to take a sip of your coffee. "My family has a right to know and I want them to meet the mother of my child," you told me. You did have a point. But what if they didn't like me? What if they shunned me because of my heritage? Surely they wouldn't, but I didn't know anything about them!
"Lauri I don't know…" I said.
"Sky they have a right," you said firmly. I nodded.
"And my family has a right too," I reminded him.
"I know," you said. "That's why I want to bring you and your family to Finland to meet my family. That way when the baby is born things won't be so weird," you said and smiled at your idea.
"I don't know if my family would agree to it. When would we go? How long would we be gone for? I can't just put my life on hold to travel to Finland and neither can my parents," I had told you.
"Would you stop that?" you asked in an annoyed tone. "A vacation would do you and your parents good. You could stay for as long as you'd like," you said. "I'll arrange and pay for everything."
"We couldn't ask you to do that," I said stunned.
"But I insist," you said. "After all, you are the mother of my child. I owe you much respect," you said and took my hand in yours. Raising it to your face you kissed it delicately.
"I have to convince my parents first," I said. "They don’t even know I'm pregnant yet!" It was your turn to gasp.
"They don't even know? How could you?" you asked. "Are you ashamed?" You retracted your hand and pulled away from me.
"No, no. It's nothing like that Lauri," I tried to assure you. "It's just that…my parents and I don't get along that well. Well, mostly my mother and I," I confessed. "It has nothing to do with you at all. To announce you to my family would be an honor," I told you reaching out for your face. "But the thing is…I wouldn't even know how to introduce you to them." You reached out and wrapped your hand around mine holding my hand to your cheek.
"We'd figure that out," you said slowly. I pulled my hand away and sat upright.
"Am I not good enough to be introduced to as something more than a fuck buddy?" I asked harshly.
"I didn't say that…I just…everything's happening so fast," you said. I pushed my chair back, it's squealing on the hard floor sending awful noises throughout the apartment. I stood up and glared at you.
"Get out," I said. You stood up and came over to me taking my shoulders in your hands. I jerked away from you roughly. "Don't touch me!" I hissed pushing you off.
"Sky…I didn't mean…" you begged.
"Get out!" I yelled louder. "Get out, get out, get out!" I hollered as I struggled to wriggle out of your firm grasp. Beating your chest as hard as I could I began to loose control and began sobbing. "Am I not enough? Is your child not enough? What will it take for you to let go and just…love again?"
"Sky…don't do this, don't shut off," you plead. I crumple to the floor on my knees as you kneel in front of me desperately trying to get me to look at you. I slowly raised my face to look at you. Tear stains and all, I couldn't help but smirk at your remark.
"You've shut me off, remember?" I ask and push your shoulder roughly. "I don't want you here right now," I said as I got to my feet. "I need to re-evaluate what I'm going to do about this whole mess I got myself into."
"Sky please," you reached out for me. I shrugged you away. "I'm sorry." I looked at you sadly and said,
"Sometimes sorry just isn't enough."
xx Lauri

You were so far out of reach. But your words were true. I did shut you off without meaning to. I was scared of giving you a proper title, but yet I wanted it just as badly as I wanted to be on stage. The fear was so strong that it consumed me and made everything I wanted that much harder to reach. But I wanted you. I wanted to share my life with you and our child. I wanted what Eero had, but I didn't know how to fix what disaster I had just caused.
Walking out of your apartment complex and hailed a taxi and asked to be brought to a shopping center. Getting out of the car at the nearest mall, I walked inside and began looking around for inspiration to make the things that made me upset go away. That's when I spotted what I knew would make you come back to me and be mine…forever.
It was dark inside your home when I arrived later that evening. I crept in and peeked inside your bedroom to see you fast asleep with headphones on your stomach. I walked over to you and listened to the music coming out of it. I smiled as I heard my voice singing softly. Touching your forehead you stirred but didn't wake. Leaning down I kissed the top of your head and whispered in your ear.
"I promise you forever if you'll have me when you wake up. You may not believe in us but I do. We are a part of each other for the rest of our lives," I whispered. "I'll be here when you wake up. You are my beautiful angel…mina rakastan sinua," I said to you and touched my hand to your belly. Smiling I walked out of the room leaving you to sleep peacefully.

The next morning I woke up with a neck cramp. Rubbing my neck tenderly with the palm of my right hand I sat upright and looked around. I didn't hear any noise within the house and I got worried a bit. Standing unsteadily to my feet I wandered into the kitchen to find it empty. I noticed the paper stuck on the fridge and immediately went to see what it was since I didn't recall it ever being there before.

Lauri,

I had some things I had to do today so I left earlier. I'm sorry about yesterday, but you have to understand that my emotions are running their course because of the pregnancy. Not to say its any excuse, but I've been a wreck without you here going through this with me.

Maybe we just need some time to think things through logically before we dive head first into things we're really not ready for. I've talked to my parents last night and told them about you. They're planning a dinner tonight which we have to attend. I didn't tell them about the baby – I wanted them to meet you first before I sprang it on them. We'll talk about going to Finland with them tonight, I promise. Whatever you need to feel comfortable with this situation I'm willing to help you with. I just don't want my child growing up not ever knowing its father.

We should talk when I get home. I'll be back around noon. ~ Sky

I sighed in relief when I finished reading your note. I was glad you didn't really mean everything you said the previous evening. And I was happy to see that you wanted to go home with me. I had to make you see that things between us were not just a once in a lifetime thing – that I really wanted to have you and my child with me forever. It was after I read your note that I began planning on how to make you stay in my life permanently.
I only hopped that you wanted it as much as I did.
- 6
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- 8
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(Promise to) Keep Your Heart Broken