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A Secret Between Us	By : pissiMissi Category: Musicals/Plays > RENT Views: 1048 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own RENT, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 6
- 7
- 8
Chapter Six: Trusting Desire

Mark’s POV
Mimi thought it was best for her and Roger to move into her loft downstairs. They slept in her loft that night I didn’t miss hearing their fucking. The next day Roger came up to get a few of his things, his fender of course, his clothes what little he did have and his pillow. Roger always had to have his pillow, in all of our years together he slept with an extra one. I asked him about it once, he threatened to beat the shit out of me if I ever told anyone. I promised I wouldn’t out of fear. He told me that he needed one to hug while he slept. He said it made him feel less alone while he was trying to fall asleep, Roger hated sleeping alone. When he was suffering those first few weeks of withdrawal he had me sleep next to him with his arm tightly around me. I don’t know exactly why he felt the desperate need for something to hug. At first I thought it was because he missed April and needed something or someone to fill her side of the bed, but I wasn’t sure why he would need one now that he had Mimi.....
“I can’t believe Benny said all of that shit,” Roger said, “He’s such a bastard!”
I wanted to know how Mimi was doing and had to bite my tongue to keep quiet. Don’t pry. But I wanted to pry. I wanted to know if she was alright, I wanted to hold her and tell her she didn’t deserve the shit he was putting her through.
“Mark, do you really think Mimi would do that to me?” He asked as he was about to leave. “How could she cheat on me that easily?”
I felt my heart sink into what seemed a dark black hole that would go on forever. What would he do if he ever found out that she and I have kissed numerous times? What if he found out how I felt about her? Sure, she could deny it but Roger knows me. I’m a horrible liar when it comes to him. When I didn’t answer right away Roger’s shoulders slumped a little, “You know, Benny,” I said suddenly, “He’s always trying to piss you off. I’m sure Mimi just went to talk to him about evicting us.” I didn’t want to mention I recognized her as Benny’s adulteress lover when we saw her however long ago that was. “She wouldn’t get involved with him.” I was telling myself just as much as I was telling Roger. “She has trouble with her rent too.....they probably have seen a lot of each other because of that.” I winced, that didn’t sound good.
He nodded angrily. “Yeah....yeah you’re right.”
-
The Cat Scratch Club
Mimi’s POV
My head was spinning, my skin was tingling like fire, the lights shined all around me there was the room was thick with smoke and reeked of marijuana, the boss was careless after 2 A.M. Sleazy men, business men, policemen maybe a few dykes waved crisp big dollar bills in my face it was all very tempting. There was no reason to go home early, Roger was still angry and I even if I did go home I didn’t want to talk to Roger I just wanted to see Mark. Mark wouldn’t be angry at me, he wouldn’t call me a slut. I felt sluggish and sick suddenly, everything seemed to be in slow motion, like I was watching myself in a shitty movie. My hand grazed the slick pole.....or maybe my fingers were slick I couldn’t tell, I felt myself falling. Everything went black.
When I opened my eyes again Lisa was sitting next to me in the dressing room, my head was killing me. She wasn’t really a friend just one of the girls that did the schoolgirl strip show with me a few weeks before, we’d exchanged a story or two during business hours.
“I called someone to walk you home,” she said lighting up a cigarette for herself, she lit mine from the burning head of hers. Lisa didn’t bother to take it from between her lips.
I could feel the color draining from my face as I looked at her. The last thing I wanted was for Roger to see me like this. He didn’t know I was using again even though the last few nights I’d shot up before we had sex.
She chuckled, “Don’t worry. I couldn’t get in touch with your boyfriend your phone was disconnected.”
Mark? I thought hopeful but Lisa didn’t know who Mark was much less what his number was.
“Hi, baby!”
I looked up to see Angel waving at me in the doorway, Collins’ peered around the door putting his head on her shoulder. He gave me a small wave, a joint stuck between his thumb and index finger, “Hey Mimi.”
I smiled, thanked Lisa for calling them and left.
Later - still Mimi’s POV
As soon as I got home I went to the bathroom, I needed to rinse out my mouth. My dealer had been close by Angel saw me see him, but she didn’t say anything. She knew I went over to him after they were gone. Angel knows everything.
I kicked at the sink before trying to turn it on, the water tasted like blood, but it was better then the taste of that man. I prefer tasting blood over knowing how desperate I can be when I’m broke. I wiped my mouth and stared at myself in the mirror for a long time. I sighed, pathetically shoving the small baggie I got from my dirty deed with the Man farther into my skirt pocket. Roger was strumming angry chords on his guitar, “I’m sorry I’m late....” I called from the bathroom sliding off the platform heels, “there was a problem with my paycheck.” Like he’s never lied to me....
He didn’t say anything. The chord changed to something lower, “So....” he said as I was walking into the livingroom, he didn’t look back at me, he kept playing. “Did you fuck Benny again?” Roger slid off the table and set his guitar on it, walking closer to me.
I had to bite my tongue to keep from screaming at him. It’s funny how men do everything they can to accuse a girl of cheating with an ex. What is it with men and women’s exes? If we broke up why in God’s name would we be fucking on the side? “How many times do I have to tell you, Benny and I were together before I ever who the hell you were.” I was a living contradiction. I should have stopped, left it at that, but I wanted to make him hurt. I wanted to make him pay for bringing up all the bad memories of my life with Benny and all the shit that son of a bitch put me through. I wanted to make him hurt for being in the way of any kind of relationship I could have ever with Mark. “If you want a girl that cheats on you then you shouldn't have let your precious April die! She was fucking the dealer all the time for the drugs,” I felt horrible for saying it but everyone knew, all of us knew about clients like her but mostly because I was worse then April. So much worse. The look on his face made me want to cry, my mouth kept going, “I’m fucking sick of you going on about her, she’s the reason you’re dying, Roger!”
“How dare you?” His hand came up to hit me, but he didn’t. Roger closed his eyes and spoke, “You have no right to say that. She may have fucked up but I....” He trailed off looking down at the floor.
I turned away from him fuming, “What? You have nothing else to say about little miss perfection?” My hand brushed over the pocket holding my stash, I was more then ready to use it and now. Wait.... I brushed my fingers over it again. Nothing. I turned back around to face him.
Roger held the same plastic baggie in his hand, staring at it.
Shit.
“What the fuck is this?” He asked, he looked more hurt then angry.
“What does it look like?” I said, “You accuse me of fucking Benny then expect me to sleep with you two hours later. Goddammit, Roger, he used to hit me! And now you’re accusing me of fucking someone I would never go near.” Tears were pouring down my cheeks making my face itch. Oh god....if only you knew who I really....
He didn’t say anything for several minutes, then finally he made eye contact, “You promised. I just....how could you?” Roger walked passed me towards the door he looked at the baggie and tossed it on the floor in front of me.
The stairwell - Mark’s POV
I could hear the yelling from downstairs only because my window to the fire escape was open and so was theirs.
Roger stormed out of the building, probably out for a drink. I went out into the stairwell to find Mimi sitting on the bottom of the stairs. She must have heard me coming and ran up to meet me in the middle. She was trembling when I finally wrapped my arms around her. “It’s okay now,” I whispered stroking her curly hair. “It’s going to be okay,” I wasn’t sure if that was a lie or not. It was very clear that I was falling in love with her and the way she clung to me and later kissed me that she truly felt the same.
- 6
- 7
- 8
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A Secret Between Us