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Nobody's Home	By : EmilyRose Category: My Chemical Romance > Slash - Male/Male Views: 2271 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know the members of My Chemical Romance. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 6
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- 8
A/N: So here's the alternate part, starting from when Mikey tells Gerard he has to choose.
Song: Sophie Zelmani - I'll Remember You
Disclaimer: I don't own the people in this story or the song.

It's daybreak
And you are asleep
I can hear you breathe now
Your breath is so deep

Suddenly I woke up with a cry. My body burned and I threw the blankets of me to cool down. My head was spinning as I massaged my temples slowly. Finally I couldn't take it anymore and I started sobbing uncontrollable. What had just happened? Had I been dreaming, or did I really meet Mikey? If I did, then why did I not get to chose?

As I cried a million thought ran through my head, and I tried as hard as I could to block them out. At first my sobs where quiet, but after a while I was crying so hard and loud it was a miracle my parents didn't hear me. Or maybe they did. Maybe they just knew that they did best in leaving me be.

A soft tap on the door was heard, but I did nothing to respond to it. Instead I crawled out of bed onto the floor as I tried best I could not to let my heart be ripped apart. I crawled like a pathetic old dog, ashamed of pissing inside on the carpet, to the corner of my room. There I curled up and wrapped my arms around my legs as I continued crying loudly.

Finally my door opened and someone stepped inside, I didn't care to look up and see who it was. I didn't want anything, I just wanted to die. I just wanted to sleep again, and dream of Mikey.

Soft footsteps could be heard as someone walked closer to me. Soft, careful footsteps, like whoever was walking were afraid I'd jump on them and bite their head of. Finally they reached me and I felt a hand on my shoulder. I lifted my head a little and found myself staring into the warm eyes of Frank.

I opened my mouth, to try and say something, but not a sound came out. Frank didn't push me; he sat down next to me and took me in his arms. How is it that he can always tell what's the best thing to do in a situation, no matter how crazy it is? How is it that he always knows how to make things better? 'Because he loves you' said a small voice in my head.

I let my arms wrap around his body as I buried my face in the crook of his neck. I planned on crying until there were no more tears, because that was what I needed at the moment.

"Are you ready to talk?" Frank's voice startled me a little, since I hade grown used to the silence in my dark and gloomy room. I nodded a little and let him help me up and over to the bed where we sat down. I let his hands hold mine as he studied my face, waiting for me to take the first step.

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes as I tried to form the words I had in my head to sentences he's understand. Finally I opened my eyes again, and began telling him about the dream. I knew it would sound weird, but I also knew that Frank wouldn't judge me, and that he wouldn't laugh at me either. He would understand why I had woken up like I did, why I had cried like that when he came back.

It was only when I had finished my story that it hit me. He came back, even after how I treated him. He hadn't let my anger keep him away; he came back, because he loves me.

At first he didn't speak, he just let his thumbs trace small circles on the back of my hands as he looked at me. Then he opened his mouth and spoke, without sarcasm or the slightest hint of anger. "Would you have picked him?"

I had to look away from him as he spoke his question. I knew it was only fair of me to answer that question, and I knew all along that it would come. But it was still a hard thing to decide. After a few minutes of thinking I looked back at Frank and gave him my answer.

I look at your lips
I know how soft they can be
Do they know what they wanted
The times they kissed me

"I think I want to go back to sleep now." I finally said, hours later. We had been sitting on my bed, just holding hands and talking for the longest time. I was so tired I could barely keep my eyes open, and my body was screaming for sleep. He smiled and let go of my hands as he stood up. Just when he was about to leave I stopped him. "Stay here" I whispered quietly. I didn't want to be alone. I never wanted to be alone again.

He simply nodded and let his body rest next to mine under the covers after taking of his jeans. I felt the skin on his arm touch mine and it felt like I was being burned. My heart leaped violently and my pulse quickened. I felt like a million ants where marching around on my skin and I had to close my eyes and swallow to prevent myself from giving out… not a moan. But more like a content sigh.

He lay on his back, staring at the ceiling as I lay on my side, facing away from him. I heard him whisper good night, and I replied while shifting my weight to make it more comfortable. But I couldn't go to sleep. I opened my eyes and stared at the digital clock, that with its bright red digits seemed to mock me and my lack of sleep in this early hour.

Finally I gave out a loud sigh as I knew I wasn't going to fall asleep like this. I felt Frank shift behind me and then felt one of his arms rest on my shoulder as he leaned over me. "Go to sleep Gerard, or you'll be tired tomorrow." His voice was soft, not louder then a whisper. I nodded my head and closed my eyes. But I opened them again as I felt him take his hand away from my shoulder to go back to lying on his back. I turned to him slightly and grabbed his hand. Then I took it with me slowly, and turned back to the side, placing his hand under my chin, lacing my fingers together with his.

Now that his arm was around me, he had no choice but to spoon me, and as he did I gave out a loud sigh, knowing I'd be able to fall asleep now. After he had made himself comfortable he snuggled into my neck and kissed it softly a few times. Then came the words I'd never heard him say, even though I knew exactly how he felt.

"I love you Gerard."

Your eyes
That always makes me shiver
Now they are closed

The next morning I woke up with Franks arm still around me, and I couldn't help but smile. My eyes flew awake as I realized what I had just done. I had smiled. For the first time since Mikey died I had smiled for real. Not a fake smile to make my mother stop worrying, or a plastered on smile that I had at the funeral to make all my relatives go away. No, a genuine happy smile was on my lips. And who made me smile? Frank did. Almost like he had read my mind Frank kissed my cheek from behind startling me. "I knew you hadn't forgotten how to smile"

His comment only made me smile even wider as I turned around, so that I was facing him. At first we just lay there, staring at eachother, drowning in each others eyes. But all good things must come to an end, and I knew I had to end it. I let my hand caress his cheek as I tried to speak my mind.

"I like you so much Frank" I hesitated for a minute when I saw the glimpse of hope in his eyes. "I really do, but" When I said the last word his eyes fell again, and I could see the tears welling up. "I need time" I finished, and then I searched his eyes for any hint of anger, without finding any. He nodded and let his hands rest on my stomach, tracing small circles under the soft fabric of my t-shirt.

"I have all the time in the world baby" I smiled at the nickname he gave me, and then my face got serious again. "I mean it Frank, you deserve someone that can be yours an-" He cut me off by giving me the look. And by the look I mean 'the look'! There's no way to describe it, but when Frank gives you 'the look' then you shut up instantly. And I did, I closed my mouth and fell silent again.

"I said I have all the time in the world Gerard, and I mean it" Finally I allowed myself to take in his words. I allowed myself to trust them. I allowed myself to promise him silently that I would be his, no matter how long it would take.

Later that day I knelt in front of my brother, tears burning behind my eyes and a single white rose in my hand. I let my fingers trace the text on his tombstone as the wind caused my hair to dance around my shoulders.

Michael James Way
1980 – 2002
Beloved son and brother
"I'll wait for you"

Maybe it was stupid that we had imprinted the text from his suicide note on the tombstone, but I wanted it there. I wanted to be reminded of why he did it. My parents didn't understand what the note meant, but they knew I knew. And they understood that they did best in letting me have my will. I'm sure they hoped that I'd tell them someday, the meaning of Mikey's last words on this earth. And I'm sure they're right. Some day, far off in the future, I will tell them about Mikey's last hours in life. But not now.

"Hi Mikes" My voice was just above a whisper, and it almost flew away with the sharp, cold wind as it left my lips. I leaned in to kiss the stone lightly, and I knew it must have looked stupid. But I didn't care, I was doing something I should've done a long time ago, and I didn't care if anyone thought I was insane.

I bit my lip and closed my eyes as I mentally slapped myself for not being able to get any words out. "I love you Mikey, and I always will" Tears flew freely down my cheeks now, and I did nothing to stop them. "But I have to let go" I sobbed and took a deep breath before continuing. "You'll always be my brother, but I have to let go" I said again, my voice trembling with emotion. "There- there will never be a day when you're not on my mind. You'll always be my first love, and you'll always be my best friend" My heart was pounding in my chest, and it got harder and harder to breathe. I felt a pressure over my lungs as I tried to continue. "I'm sorry Mikey, but it wasn't my fault, I understand that now. I'll never forget about you. Never. I'll remember you"

Finally it was done. I had let go of my brother. My dear baby brother that had been dead for almost eight months. I knew I had to do it, and now that it had been done I felt alive again. The pain in my heart subsided, and instead it was filled with joy. I knew I would never forget Mikey, and I didn't want to. I knew I'd always be sad, and I'd always miss him. But I'd continue living. And I'd always have Frank by my side, because he promised he'd never leave me. And I trusted him. For the first time since Mikey died, I trusted someone. And I knew that in time I'd come to love Frank just as much as he loved me. Because now I wasn't afraid anymore, I wasn't scared that Mikey would hate me.

I knew he would want me to move on; he'd want me to be happy. And I was going to be happy, for the first time since Mikey said 'I love you' I was going to be happy.

I stood up, after placing the rose on his grave, and took a few steps back to the path. But before leaving to join Frank in the car where he had been waiting I let my gaze fall upon the gravestone one last time. And as I whispered "I'll remember you" I swore I could hear a soft "I'll wait for you" in reply.

I'll remember you
You will be there in my heart
I'll remember you
That's all that I can do
And I'll remember

A/N: So it's not the end, there will be plenty more!
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Nobody's Home