End of an Era | By : SirenSong Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > Nightwish Views: 1733 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know the celebrity I am writing about. I do not make any money from the writing of this story. |
Title: End of an Era
Author: Aurelia (a.k.a. GoldSiren on FF.net)
Rating: NC-17, just to be safe
Pairings: Tarja Turunen/Marcelo Cabuli (mentioned), Tarja Turunen/Tuomas Holopainen
Warnings: Angst, Self-injury, Alternate reality, Hurt/comfort, Language, Possible violence (more warnings may be added later)
Summary: After being expelled from Nightwish, Tarja has to find a new path in life- but everything’s changed. Left alone in the world, can she still achieve her dreams or are they now too far away?
Disclaimer: This story has been written without gain and I neither know nor own the people involved. Lyrics used are not my own and artists used with be noted through out the story. Nightwish songs and lyrics will be the most commonly used and all actual setting are made up although the towns, etc are real. Please don’t sue; I’m only a poor student…
Author’s Note: Many bands/singers/songs mentioned (same goes for last few chapters!)… I wish I owned them but, alas, I do not… Please note: heila translates to sweetheart from Suomi (Finnish), while kulta translates to darling from Suomi (Finnish).
*End of an Era: Sleeping Beauty*
Mind still racing from her dream, Tarja pushes her way through the shadows and breaks through into the light once more. She feels exhausted and weak, sick.
Her eyes flicker around quickly, seeing the shadows that move at the corners of her vision and knowing that the darkness wants to claim her again. She doesn’t want to dream anymore today and the darkness doesn’t hold her as well as it used to.
Her breath freezes in her lungs when she hears the whispered, “the hiding amaranth in the land…”
Focusing on Tuomas as he sits there, pen in one hand and book in the other, Tarja breathes a sigh of relief, struggling for a moment in an attempt to sit up. She sees Marco and Emppu sitting across the room, a PlayStation 2 hooked up to her TV as they race each other, Marco clearly in the lead.
With her continual shifting, Tarja unknowingly attracts Tuomas’ attention, jumping when he rearranges the pillows to help her sit up. “Good morning, sleeping beauty,” Tuomas says with a gentle smile as Tarja’s emerald eyes meet his.
Noticing the fear glowing in hers, Tuomas moves closer carefully. Moving again to wrap an arm around her shoulders, Tuomas frowns when Tarja shifts away from him.
“Tarja?” Tuomas asks, catching Marco and Emppu’s attention.
Staring at the three men, three of the four remaining Nightwish members, Tarja feels so nervous, wishing she could just run away and hide. Sink into the darkness of eternal peace like she had tried to. But she wanted them here, didn’t she?
Eyes wide and face still pale, Tarja meets Tuomas’ eyes once more as Marco and Emppu move closer to the bed.
“How are you feeling, heila?” Marco asks.
Swallowing twice, Tarja tries to speak but her voice is too soft, her throat too dry and she smiles at the boys ruefully.
Jumping up, Emppu leaves the room, returning with a nurse moments later.
The nurse checks Tarja over quickly, soon happy with her progress and informs her that the doctor will be in the next morning. Thoughtfully, the nurse had also left behind a cup of ice chips, warning Tarja to take it slow and relax.
With the three men around her, Tarja carefully takes some of the ice chips, allowing the coolness to soothe her aching throat.
Marco smiles as she swallows, licking her lips to moisten them, “How are you feeling, heila?” He asks again, smiling as he reaches forward, gently brushing a few strands of her hair behind her ear.
“Sore,” Tarja responds as she shifts away, the pain in her arms flaring again.
None of the men respond for a moment as Emppu’s eyes meet hers, his skittering away as tears seem to form.
A few moments pass in awkward silence and Tarja focuses on a point beyond all of the men, beginning to wish for that strange shadowy place as butterflies flutter through her stomach.
“Tarja,” Tuomas begins, his voice deadly serious. “We wanted to apologise. Everything got way out of hand and things just seemed to snowball…”
Marco takes over, “we didn’t think that you were really committed…”
“We reacted to Marcelo and stopped seeing you as an individual, we should have spoken with you before writing the letter. Before even considering the letter,” Emppu says, staring into Tarja’s eyes. “We’re sorry, Tarja.”
“All of us are,” Tuomas adds.
Tears spill from her eyes and Tarja looks away from the three men, a reluctant and sad smile crossing her lips, “I’m sorry too. I should have seen what Marcelo was really like, I knew things weren’t working out between everyone bnt I was too busy trying to be perfect to let it go.”
Marco reaches out, taking her hand, “It’s alright now, heila, Marcelo is out of our lives.”
Moving carefully, Tuomas once again moves closer to Tarja, perching on the edge of the bed as he wraps an arm around her shoulders. Within moments, Tarja has turned into his arms, her eyes overflowing with regretful tears. They’re here, she’s not Nightwish anymore but they’re here.
“I’m just glad you’re all here now.” Tarja whispers, feeling Tuomas’ tense slightly.
Even the other two boys are silent for a moment and Tarja begins to wonder if this isn’t all a figment of her imagination. Maybe she’s just dreaming again? Has she offended them somehow?
Pulling away from Tuomas slightly, she quickly finds herself pulled back into his arms and held tightly.
When Tuomas finally speaks, his voice seems thick with tears, “did you think we wouldn’t come to see you after all of this?” He takes a deep breath, “did you honestly believe that we wouldn’t be here for you?”
Feeling so confused, Tarja pulls back slightly trying to look into his averted eyes. She nods slightly as she remembers the house, the lack of contact, the accusing looks...
“Kulta,” Emppu cuts in, “how could you think that? You’re like a sister to us!”
So many thoughts are swirling through her head, the letter at the forefront as they handed it to her before walking away. Some of the fans had known before she had…
It seems so wrong to bring it up again, but it’s played such a big role in her life recently- so much so that the words are seared into her brain for all eternity. What did they expect her to think? They called her a diva and threw her out of the band!
“The letter,” Tarja responds as she pushes away from Tuomas, focusing her eyes on the blanket. “That isn’t something you would write to a sister.”
Silence flourishes in the room and she knows that she’s hit the rock behind this whole debacle. The proverbial brick wall in their path. Yet, for the first time since this has all happened, the sorrow’s drained away and Tarja is left with something that she should have felt from the beginning- anger. How could they have done this to her? She’d done just as much for them as they had for her and they threw her out?
The only reason she’d ever done all the interviews was because they didn’t want too! She hated the interviews and the publicity! It was all well and good, it meant that the band was improving, but she would have been happy for them to handle it!
With no response forthcoming from the men, Tarja looks up- pale eyes meeting each of their own before locking onto Tuomas’, “would you?”
He swallows, seemingly unable to speak.
“Would you write a letter like that to a sister, Tuomas?” Tarja asks, her voice soft in her pain, anger and sorrow.
“Tarja,” Tuomas begins, “things were different at that stage…”
Blood freezing in her veins, Tarja remembers that she’d been so happy at that point- things hadn’t been great between her and Marcelo but they weren’t too bad after spending some time apart and the band was tense, but she’d thought it was still okay. They hadn’t spoken to her about it yet, but she had been so certain that they would and that everything would be fine. She just had to keep impoving.
“Why?” Her eyes are brimming with tears as she asks the question, “was it because I was married? Is that all it takes? Or perhaps it was because I was happy?” Holding herself upright and tense, Tarja feels the room spin briefly but still continues, “or is it because I hadn’t tried to kill myself yet? Would you even be here if I hadn’t?”
The silence is deafening in its clarity and Tarja looks down, her breath feeling weighted by the truth and tightness in her chest. She still loves them.
A heartbeat fades into eternity before she looks up.
Nothing is said for another moment before Tarja shatters the uneasy silence, tears glittering in her eyes, “I think you should go.”
“Tarja-” Tuomas begins, his voice only a whisper.
She cuts through whatever he’d been about to say, “Don’t Tuomas. Maybe you were right, maybe I’m not Nightwish anymore.”
The tears burning in her eyes, Tarja signals the three men towards the door, only allowing the sobs freedom with the tears as the door clicks shut. She curls up on herself, wrapping her arms around her legs as she cries- she wants them to come back, to tell her she’s wrong and hold her. But they’re not going too…
She doesn’t know when she fell asleep, but she must have because the next thing she knows she’s floating in a sea of comforting cobalt and the sun sets, burning orange against the clouded sky.
Yet on the shore stands a lone figure and she looks up, meeting the wolfish eyes of the man that holds her child. Eyes widening, she tries to swim back to shore but arms wrap around her waist, pulling her under the water as a voice, her voice, whispers in her ear, “you’re not ready…”
While AFF and its agents attempt to remove all illegal works from the site as quickly and thoroughly as possible, there is always the possibility that some submissions may be overlooked or dismissed in error. The AFF system includes a rigorous and complex abuse control system in order to prevent improper use of the AFF service, and we hope that its deployment indicates a good-faith effort to eliminate any illegal material on the site in a fair and unbiased manner. This abuse control system is run in accordance with the strict guidelines specified above.
All works displayed here, whether pictorial or literary, are the property of their owners and not Adult-FanFiction.org. Opinions stated in profiles of users may not reflect the opinions or views of Adult-FanFiction.org or any of its owners, agents, or related entities.
Website Domain ©2002-2017 by Apollo. PHP scripting, CSS style sheets, Database layout & Original artwork ©2005-2017 C. Kennington. Restructured Database & Forum skins ©2007-2017 J. Salva. Images, coding, and any other potentially liftable content may not be used without express written permission from their respective creator(s). Thank you for visiting!
Powered by Fiction Portal 2.0
Modifications © Manta2g, DemonGoddess
Site Owner - Apollo