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Miwaku no Zakuro	By : Tcharlatan Category: > Kyo/Kaoru Views: 2861 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of pure fiction. I do not personally know any of the members of Dir en grey, X Japan, or KISAKI, and do not profit from this work.

Chapter List
- 8
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- 10
One thin hand between his shoulder blades guided Kyo to lower his torso, and he obliged shakily. Closing his eyes, he shifted back so that his knees were on the tatami and rested his chest on the cushion, face hidden in the crook of his folded arms. There was no shame in hiding, not from this. When unwelcome hands traced down his back, over his butt, down his thighs to press them apart, encouraging him to open up, he had to bite back a frantic whimper. His collar was still activated, after all; to make noise would only add injury to this insult.
Kaoru couldn’t be happier as he stared down at his pet. Even fraught with fear, Kyo was a beautiful sight to behold. The blonde’s back formed a graceful arch from where his shoulders rested on the crimson pillow, up to where his delightfully-rounded ass was raised in offering. The elegant curve of his ribs expanded and contracted rapidly, but smoothly as he fought to regulate his breathing. His legs – reluctantly parted in a tantalizing display – were that of a dancer, powerful but elegantly lean, his lightly-tanned skin near-flawless. Not being able to see his pet’s face was a slight disappointment, but that could come later. Reaching out to the small side table one more, he collected a tube of lubricant from one of the drawers.
Kyo bit his lip when he felt one slick finger press into him and for a moment, he couldn’t stop himself from clamping down, trying to push out the unwelcome invader. The digit only pressed deeper, twisting a bit as if to explore his insides at his captor’s leisure. Taking a deep breath, he forced himself – with more than a couple shuddering failures – to relax his muscles. He felt a hand come to rub the small of his back encouragingly before a second finger was added and he was clamping down again, wincing at how his own reaction increased the faint ache of the stretch.
‘I need to relax…’
‘How am I supposed to relax?! I’m being rap-’
‘No! I… I chose to do this, I chose to accept this!’
‘There isn’t… there isn’t a gun to my head this time…’
‘But isn’t it still…?’
Sniffling, Kyo wondered distantly whether or not he should be happy that Kaoru was taking the time to prepare him. It was a concession purely for his comfort, since the older man certainly didn’t have to put any effort into stretching him; to a certain extent he’d probably enjoy himself more if Kyo was tighter. But it also meant that this whole ordeal would take that much longer to be over with. That much longer on his knees with his ass in the air, that much longer allowing himself to be violated. He had been expecting to be used – to be pushed down and fucked with no regard for his comfort, let alone his pleasure – so to be shown any sort of consideration… It almost made things worse, a blatant mockery of the affection and care that should accompany this act. It also robbed him of the pain he needed to fuel the anger that let him pretend to be strong, leaving him only afraid and sick with shame.
The two fingers inside him crooked, just a bit, and brushed against a cluster of nerves that made Kyo arch, hissing at the spark of unwanted pleasure that jolted up his spine. He had to bite into his fist – the bandages wound around his hand protecting his flesh from further damage – to keep from crying out as his keeper ruthlessly manipulated that sensitive nub, drawing his body towards arousal despite his mind’s railing protests. To his shame, Kyo felt himself slowly beginning to harden in response to Kaoru’s handling. He shook his head frantically; he didn’t want to enjoy this! He didn’t want any gratification from being fucked by his captor, he just wanted the man to use him and be done with it! But the expectation of pain – the need for it – only made the truth of his pleasure that much more poignant, and his body quaked under the strain.
‘No… damn it, no!’
‘I can’t be enjoying this!’
‘I don’t want-’
His foggy mind half-registered two quiet beeps just before a third finger was added. The slight twinge and ill-gotten pleasure quickly struck the soft sound from his attention, but a quieter corner of his psyche understood their meaning. It was difficult to focus properly and though that made the whole situation a little bit easier to deal with, it also made it harder to force himself to loosen up whenever he tensed. Kaoru was merciless in a way that Kyo hadn’t been expecting, and it was hard to come to terms with it. Panting, fighting against the steadily-tightening coil of heat building in his belly, he whined softly and pressed his face deeper into the pillow.
His left hand curled into a fist, slamming once, twice, three times – over and again – furiously into the tatami mats as angry tears streaked down his cheeks.
‘I’m a fucking freak…’
‘I can’t think…’
‘Why can’t I just control-’
“Try to relax, pet,” Kaoru murmured as he withdrew his fingers. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
Thin hands grabbed hold of his hips, and Kyo’s back arched with a sharp hiss as he was slowly, relentlessly filled with something so much hotter and thicker than the fingers previously invading him. He felt his shoulders start to roll forward under the strain and had to spread his arms, bracing his hands against the floor to keep himself steady as Kaoru rocked deeper and deeper into him with languid but powerful thrusts. Kyo couldn’t help but growl helplessly, and not just because his inability to stay relaxed made every push an aching stretch; he could hear the soft clink of Kaoru’s belt with every rock of the older man’s hips, could feel the rough slide of wool slacks against his thighs. Kaoru hadn’t bothered to undress himself, which only served to emphasize the fact that he was using Kyo as nothing more than a means to his own pleasure. Bare but for his damnable collar, Kyo felt absolutely worthless beneath his keeper.
Then Kaoru’s cockhead was brushing against that traitorous cluster of nerves so deep inside him, and Kyo couldn’t hold back a mortified little groan at the spark that coursed through him as a result. Kaoru heard it, of course, and knew exactly what it meant, reveling in the soft sound just as much as he reveled in the firm body beneath him. He smoothed one hand fondly over the sweat-slicked dip of his pet’s lower back as he shifted his hips, driving at that same spot over and again. He didn’t hit it with every thrust, but he hit it more than often enough to leave Kyo a quivering, shame-ridden mess of sordid pleasure. The older man watched through lowered lashes as his pet turned his head, face coming free of its hiding place in the pillow in search of air. And but for the tears clinging stubbornly to thick eyelashes, the sight was stunning; full lips parted for panting and breathy half-moans, soft cheeks flushed, burnt-gold eyes blazing with lust-tainted fury.
Half-lucid with fatigue and starvation, Kyo couldn’t fight for long against the sensations flooding him, a steady barrage against his already-fractured will. Humiliated tears soaked the pillow beneath him, and his stomach twisted guiltily, but still his left hand crept of its own volition across the floor, seeking out the shameful ache between his legs. A whimpering moan escaped him as one of his captor’s hands beat him to his goal, wrapping firmly around his straining erection.
The tips of Kaoru’s thin fingers dug into the heated flesh just enough to send the blonde arching back with a gasp and a needy little groan as Kyo turned his face again into the cushion, using it now to muffle the sounds he couldn’t quite suppress. His heart constricted miserably as a stuttering litany of grunts, gasps, and moans poured from his throat; a lonely corner of his mind crying its desire to buck Kaoru off of him, to push the man away and run, for hours and days and weeks until he was too far away for this heartless man to ever touch him again. But the rest of his mind had given up on rational thought and his traitorous body was running the show now, pushing back against every thrust of Kaoru’s cock, rocking into every stroke of his hand.
‘Don’t want…’
‘I don’t want this!’
‘I don’t…’
‘But it feels so…!’
Kaoru went stiff behind him, a satisfied groan heralding the flood of molten liquid that he released into Kyo’s passage. A scarce handful of heartbeats passed in still silence, broken only by two voices panting harshly, before Kaoru wound his free arm around his pet’s torso and hauled the younger man up to sit with his back against his clothed chest. The blond head lolled back against his captor’s shoulder, hips beating weakly into the hand still stroking his weeping arousal. Thin lips brushed over his ear and he reached up blindly, grabbing onto the arm holding him up with both hands. He was desperately seeking anything like stability when it felt like his mind and body were both flying, but in opposite directions.
“Such a good boy…” Kaoru murmured, his voice low and smooth with satisfaction.
The hand around him constricted just a bit as it rubbed over his heated flesh, and Kyo arched into it with a sharp cry that was equal parts pleasure and anguish. Tears flowed from his eyes, cum spurted from his cock, and the two fluids marking the culmination of deeply contrasting sensations came together as they splashed across his belly. So intense was his release – so much did it take from a body that already had so little left to give – that Kyo’s vision went grey, and for a few blissful minutes, he drifted in a glorious haze where he could not think, could not hear, could not see, could not feel anything that went on around him.
Something warm and wet across his skin brought Kyo swimming back into awareness. Kaoru had gone and returned in the time that he’d been out, and was once again immaculately tucked into his pristine suit, hands clean and confident as they gently wiped the blonde with a damp towel. The older man looked so damn satisfied – so fucking smug as he cradled his pet in his lap to clean him – that Kyo couldn’t stand to look at him. He was so sick, so tired, so miserably ashamed… he simply turned his head away from his captor and let the man do as he pleased. The warm cloth ran over his belly, his groin, his thighs, his entrance, cleaning every last trace of their coupling.
Then the towel was gone and Kyo closed his eyes. He felt like he’d been hollowed out, like all that was left inside him was a little aching ball of angry misery bouncing around the empty shell of his body. It seemed like every time Kaoru touched him, the man took away a little more of him until he could hardly remember who he was before all of this started. He felt pieces of himself breaking and breaking again under his captor’s “training.” The distant corner of his mind still clinging to lucidity wondered if his soul would survive this place even if he managed to stay alive. Something cool and slick pressed brushed lightly over Kyo’s lower lip, and his eyes opened again in weary confusion.
“Open your mouth,” Kaoru ordered, looking pleased.
With a soft sigh – what did he have to lose? – Kyo obliged without bothering to look at what he was letting in. He already felt thoroughly defiled, and he couldn’t really think of anything his keeper could do at this point to make that feeling any more poignant. Besides, anything Kaoru wanted to put in his mouth would likely end up there one way or another. Something sweet and slick came to rest on his tongue and he blinked, closing his teeth on the object and chewing slowly, entirely mystified.
‘It’s… a piece of melon?’
He swallowed and tried to sit up, suddenly very attentive, succeeding only with the help of Kaoru’s hand between his shoulder blades. The older man only let him shift into a slightly more upright position, keeping him in his lap as he reached out and delicately picked up a bit of sushi. He brought the morsel to Kyo’s mouth, and the blonde’s stomach twisted noisily with want as he eagerly accepted it, eyelids fluttering with bliss. All other thought processes shut down. Kyo forgot that he was naked, limbs quivering with post-coital exertion, cradled in the lap of a man that had just fucked him against his will – albeit with his consent – trapped in a place and situation so surreal he could hardly grasp the extremity of it. All that mattered in that moment was the food.
Kaoru watched his pet with a fond half-smile as he hand-fed the blonde a veritable banquet of bite-sized foods; fried and grilled bites of meat, sushi, fresh fruit, steamed and pickled vegetables, delicate little sweet pastries, dumplings. He had to set a steady, slow pace to ensure that Kyo wouldn’t skip chewing in the hopes of getting his next bite sooner. The younger man accepted the food from him so eagerly, shaking hands grasping at the sleeve of his suit jacket each time his hand came into range, as if afraid it would stop or change direction before he could catch its offering. Kaoru ran his free hand over his pet’s hair as he fed him, enjoying the peaceful moment between them.
A bit of peach drizzled with honey left a streak of sticky sweetness on his fingers, and Kaoru paused his motions with a sly murmur, “Oh my… I certainly can’t feed you with messy hands…”
And that was all the prompting Kyo needed to pull his captor’s hand back into range by the sleeve, running his tongue over the older man’s tattooed fingers to collect every last trace of the offending honey. He did so every time a bit of food left remnants on the hand that fed him, without hesitation or need for further encouragement. He didn’t care that the act was sickeningly reminiscent of a begging dog, he didn’t care that that self-same hand had inspired more shame and fear and anger in him over the past couple days than he’d ever known, he didn’t even care that the man feeding him now was the source of his starvation in the first place. All he could focus on was his slowly-filling belly, and the steady renewal of his energy and lucidity with every bite he swallowed. In that moment – appetite whetted, hunger forefront on his mind – he would have done anything Kaoru asked of him, if it meant the man would keep feeding him.
Eventually, Kyo’s stomach started to bulge just a little, his breath deepening between each bite, and Kaoru knew he was getting full. The blonde still tried to eat – harrowed by the uncertainty of when he would next be fed – but Kaoru shook his head shortly after, replacing the covers over the dishes. His housekeepers would deal with the mess later. Unfolding himself slowly, he stood and indulged himself in a languid stretch before reaching down to unclip the leash attaching Kyo to the table, snapping his fingers to pull the younger man’s yearning gaze away from the leftovers.
“Up. Come on, now, we’re done here.”
Kyo’s stare shifted up to his captor, and Kaoru immediately braced himself for another rebellion. Something in his pet’s too-wide gold eyes had been strengthened by the much-needed meal, and something else had gone almost feral; fear of Kaoru’s anger warring with anger at the threat of starvation. Kyo was convinced that he wanted to eat still, despite the almost-nauseating full state of his belly, and Kaoru was trying to take him away from his food. Food that he had traded his dignity for, as the persistent ache and quivering fatigue in his legs mercilessly reminded him. He felt like an animal hovering over a hard-won meal, cornered by a predator.
Kaoru – never one to be cowed, particularly not by his own pet – met the younger man’s wild gaze with his own cold stare. “You’ve been so sweet tonight, little one. Don’t make me have to punish you now, after doing so well.”
‘Punish…?’
‘The gun!’
‘Don’t make him angry!’
‘But… food…’
Kyo bit his lip, looking back at the table again. He was full, vomiting was a real risk if he continued to eat. But the memory of being so weak, so dizzy, so empty for want of food was painfully fresh, and the threat of suffering through starvation again was terrifying. And this meal was so much more than simply much-needed sustenance; it had been the closest thing to compassion he’d experienced in this hellish place. His beleaguered mind had latched onto everything here – the beautiful room, the delicious food, the soft sound of the fountain, even Kaoru’s gentled touch – and he was reluctant to leave it all behind to return to his barren cell.
-“Be happy with what you have, because in spite of what you might think, there’s always plenty more that I can take away from you.”-
‘I’m lucky he fed me at all…’
‘And he didn’t hurt me… when he fuc-’
‘Don’t make him angry.’
‘He’s so cruel when he’s angry…’
Part of him knew that in order to survive – to live long enough to find a way out – he had to obey Kaoru. Another part of him railed against his complacence, screaming that he should never have bowed to his captor, allowing himself to be mounted and fucked like a bitch. A smaller, frailer part latched onto every small kindness he was shown with alarming desperation. With one last, longing glance at the leftover food, Kyo swallowed his urge to rebel and bowed his head miserably, slowly rising to his feet as he’d been bid.
- 8
- 9
- 10
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Miwaku no Zakuro