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Close	By : cresc Category: > Kyo/Kaoru Views: 2302 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know the members of Dir en grey. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1-Close
- 2-Closer
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I do not own the boys, I wish I did, but I don't. I don't even own Ganesa. ;_;
Please, comment, it would make cresc smile. ^^

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Red liquid ran down his wrist and colored it with its sweet scarlet. The razor that he had been holding with his other hand slipped from his fingers and fell to the floor.

"I’m sorry…"

*

He sat on the floor, both of his wrists open, bleeding, the red razor next to him. Salty tears fell on his soft cheeks. ‘Why does no one care?’ He questioned in his mind. ‘Why does no one love me?’

The thoughts were gone as a warm hand touched his cheek.

"I said that you should stop this, don’t you ever believe me?" Softly the other man pulled him to his sweet embrace.

"Do you hear me Kyo? You must stop this." The blonde buried his face to the other man’s chest and sobbed softly.

"I didn’t… didn’t want… but I just couldn’t… and…" His voice broke as his sobbing got stronger. "Please, Kao… don’t hate me…"

"I don’t hate you." The older man kissed softly Kyo’s forehead and held him tighter against his chest. Slowly he rocked back and forth, trying to soothe the small man in his arms. "I could never hate you. Hush now, don’t cry."

Slowly the tears stopped running and the sobs disappeared.

"Let’s get these wounds cleaned, shall we?" The blue-haired man smiled to his friend and wiped off his tears with his hand. "Let’s get these wounds cleaned."

*

The tears started to run down his cheeks. How had it come to this? It was only a crush after all, right?

Just a crush…

*

"Kyo, where are you?"

The short man sighed. "At the market, as I told you five minutes ago, when you called me the fifth time."

"We really need to talk, so come soon, ok?"

"Ok, ok. I’ll just get the milk and I’m done."

"Ok, bye."

"Bye." Kyo tossed the mobile phone to his bag and made his way to the milk shelf.

‘What’s bothering him so?’ He thought as he drove to their apartment. Kaoru was already waiting him outside the house and helped him carry the shopping bags inside.

"Would you like to have some tea?" The older man asked nervously.

"Just tell me, what’s bothering you so much that I couldn’t even buy us some bread?" Kyo sat on their small sofa and motioned with his hand to his friend to do the same.

Kaoru sat next to him, looking very nervous. Not like him at all. "Kyo, I… I think I may be falling in love with someone…"

Kyo smiled softly. "You haven’t mentioned her at all. Tell me something about her." He saw a blush rising to his friend’s cheeks, a rare sight, but even more lovely.

"The thing is… The person I think I have started falling in love with… is not ‘she’… He’s a guy."

Kyo stared at his friend with a blank expression on his face. "Oh… That’s… very nice. Tell me about him." Kyo’s smile came back to his lips.

"You’re not disgusted?" Kaoru’s voice sounded relieved. "Because I wanted him to meet you, since you’re my best friend and…" He couldn’t find the words anymore and just smiled.

"Of course I’m not disgusted. Just a little surprised, that’s all. So tell me something about him."

"Well… I met him couple of months ago and…."

*

His body trembled as he tried to silent his violent sobs, failing miserably. He covered his face with his hands, trying to hide from the non existing people looking at him. No one should see him like this, he wasn’t this weak.

*

He could hear their moans through the wall and he couldn’t ignore the aching arouse it was causing him. Until now he had convinced himself that he wasn’t doing this because he was turned on by his friend fucking other man.

His hand trembled as he heard Kaoru moan in the room next to his. A long sigh escaped his lips as air passed between his teeth. His hand picked up more speed and he could feel the orgasm hit him. As his seed covered his hand, he could hear his friends name whispered by his own lips.

And he thought he heard his name moaned in return.

*

Weak, weak, weak. It was all he had ever been. Weak and stupid. Just like a little child, so naïve.

*

He found his friend smoking in their kitchen, watching outside from the open window.

"Hey, I thought you were supposed to see the new movie with…" His words were cut with his friend’s cold glare. The pink-haired man’s eyes were puffy and red. "Kaoru… Have you been… crying?" Kyo stepped closer to his friend, who threw the rest of his cigarette out of the window.

"What do you think? Do I really look this awful every day, so you can’t really tell that I’ve been crying for the past 30 minutes?" Crystal tears started running down the creamy skin again.

"Oh, Kao… What has happened?" Kyo moved closer to his friend and softly wiped the tears off his band mate’s skin.

"He…" The older man couldn’t force the words come out of his mouth and he started sobbing violently.

"Hush… Kaoru…" He had never seen his friend this vulnerable and it scared him. He didn’t know what to do, so he just stood there and softly pulled the guitarist to his embrace. "Hush…"

The older man fell to his knees as his sobbing got wilder. He buried his face to the other man’s shirt and let him stroke his hair in a loving manner.

"Hush now…" He sat on the floor and pulled his friend closer to his body. The other let his head rest on the blonde’s shoulder and Kyo softly stroked his cheek. "Don’t cry anymore, tell me what happened…"

"He said that he couldn’t go on like this… He said that I… I was in love with someone else…"

Kyo froze. ‘Could it really be…?’ "Well… Are you…?" He could hear the little hope in his words.

"N-no… Who would…" The older one gazed at his friends eyes. "..I… be in love with…?" Slowly he shut his eyes and leaned forward, letting his lips touch the other man’s.

"Kaoru…" Kyo’s heart pounded so hard in his chest that he thought it might come through his skin any second.

The older man ran his tongue on the blonde man’s lower lip and slowly made his way past the pink lips that hid the wet warmness behind them. He tasted the sweetness of his friend’s mouth as he pushed him to his back on the cold floor. As they finally parted, both panting, he started to slowly open his friend’s loose jeans just see that the vocalist didn’t prefer any underwear.

"Kaoru… I…" His words were cut by his friend’s silky finger.

"Hush… Just this once. Do this for me just this one time." With that the guitarist pulled the blonde’s jeans off and tossed them in the corner of the room.

Kyo shut his eyes as heed ted to cover his arousal with his black t-shirt. He felt the soft red rise on his cheeks.

"Don’t hide from me…" The leader pinned Kyo’s wrists above his head with his hand and used the other one to yank the blonde’s t-shirt over his head.

Kyo felt soft finger trace his jaw line, followed by hot tongue of the pink-haired guitarist’s. A soft moan escaped his lips as he felt the guitarist’s teeth sunk in his skin. The older man’s mouth let a wet trace on Kyo’s skin as he made his way down to the vocalist’s upper body, taking one mocha-colored nipple in his mouth, sucking and nibbling it as his fingers were working at its twin.

The blonde groaned, trying to get his hands free from the other man’s grip, but the pink-haired man kept his hands pinned on the floor firmly as he continued his way lower on the other’s body.

"Kaoru…" Kyo whimpered his friend’s name, his voice full of need. He felt his body tremble as he felt a hot tongue licking his navel and making its way lower. "Please…" He heard his own voice begging.

Finally Kaoru’s hand let go of his friend’s wrists and made their way to Kyo’s soft lips, caressing the bottom lip ‘til the blonde parted his lips, welcoming the fingers, each one by one, with his wet tongue.

The older man gave a feather-light kiss on the other’s upper thigh before pulling his fingers from the blonde’s mouth and moving them to his opening. He pushed one saliva-slicked finger inside the other man, moving it slowly in and out. Soon the other man started to response to his actions, thrusting his hips to his finger, and he added another finger.

"Kao…ru…" The blonde whimpered, pleading for release. He felt the third finger enter him, stretching him. "Kaoru… please… now…" He pleaded shamelessly, opening his legs wider. "Kaoru…"

Kaoru took his fingers from his friend and opened his trousers’, sliding them with his boxers to his knees. He positioned himself between the blonde’s legs. "Kyo… I don’t want to lie, this is going to hurt…"

Kyo nodded shyly. The tearing pain run through his body as the guitarist slid inside him with one smooth movement. He didn’t scream, didn’t make any noise, but the crystal tears running down his cheeks showed that it had hurt, much.

"The pain will stop soon… Don’t worry…" The older man softly whispered in the other’s ear and wiped away the tears that stained his friend’s cheeks. Ever so slowly he started moving in and out of the blonde’s body.

Slowly the pain changed to pleasure and Kyo started pushing his hips nst nst the guitarist’s, moaning loudly. The pink-haired man gripped his waist with his hand, thrusting himself harder to the vocalist’s body. "Mhh… Kaoru… more…" The blonde spread his legs wider, letting the older man push himself even deeper inside him.

Kyo couldn’t last any longer and came between their bodies with a loud cry. Kaoru followed him with a one final deep thrust and collapsed on top of the vocalist. Pale fingers caressed the long black strands on the guitarist neck as a silent whisper broke the silence. "I love you Kaoru."

*

He wasn’t gay. He had never had any interest in guys. But it just was… him. It was just his best friend. It was just Kaoru.

*

Kyo winced with pain as Kaoru finally withdrew himself from the blonde’s body. White and red stained the vocalist’s thighs. Carefully the older man lifted the smaller man to his arms and carried him to his bedroom. "Stay still." He placed the blonde to the small futon and left the room.

Soon he came back with a towel and a bowl with warm water. He moistened the towel with the water and softly wiped of the blood and seed that stained the vocalist’s thighs. "Does it hurt anymore?" He didn’t look in his friends eyes as he dropped the towel to the bowl.

"Not much…" ‘Not as much, because now you’re with me.’ He wanted to say. He watched his lover rise from the floor and lift the bowl to his arms. "Kaoru…" The other man turned his gaze on him shyly. "Please… Stay."

The guitarist looked to his friend’s pleading eyes and put the bowl back to the floor, crawling next to his friend to the small futon, wrapping his arm around the smaller body.

Kyo snuggled closer to the guitarist, letting the sweet scent of his lover fill his nostrils.

*

His whole body trembled as he collapsed to the floor, sobbing violently, his blood and tears mixing together.

*

Kyo pulled huge t-shirt over his head and yawned loudly. The memory of last night send chills through his spine. Maybe he’d walk funny the rest of the day, but he’d do it again, any time Kaoru wanted. He scratched his head as he walked to the living room.

A sight of Kaoru’s hands wrapped around the other man’s neck, their lips entwined together. As they parted the other man smiled to him. "Oh. Hi, Kyo. Good morning. We are going to dinner, hope you don’t mind if I don’t invite you."

Kaoru smiled to his friend warmly. "Don’t worry, I’ll buy you some takeout. We’ll be back in couple of hours." With that the pink-haired man left with the other man.

Kyo stared blankly at the wall. He couldn’t move, he couldn’t breathe, he couldn’t feel a thing. Only one thing could make him feel, at least pain. Pain was a feeling. And now he graved the tough of that feeling more than ever.

*

The next thing he saw was the warm eyes of the pink-haired man. "You never listen…" The older man forced a sad smile to his lips. "I brought you some food."

Kyo raised his hand, his wrist was wrapped with soft, white fabric. He lay on the other man’s lap, the soft leather of Kaoru’s jacket feeling warm against his skin.

"Open your mouth." The guitarist held a small piece of fish with chopsticks in front of his mouth. Slowly he obeyed and felt the salty taste of the fish fill his mouth as the guitarist fed him.
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