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Jealousy Urges	By : quoteintangible Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > Metro Station Views: 895 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not know the members of Metro Station. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1-Jealousy Urges
- 1
“Mason?”

The brown haired boy had gone completely silent as his phone slipped from shaking fingers to thud noisily to the floor of our tour bus.

“Mason, what’s wrong?” Trace tried again. Mason merely shook his head as unshed tears welled in his brown eyes.

Trace moved closer to the distraught teenager and settled a steady hand on Mason’s trembling shoulders. Mason flinched away from him.

It was unnerving, disturbingly so. Mason was usually so vibrant and energetic, but in the last three weeks he had become withdrawn and distant.

It started with a phone call exactly 19 days ago. Mason had taken the phone call in private and when he returned to the bus he hadn’t said a word. Merely ran to his bed, shut the curtain and refused to talk. 19 days later his messy and unkempt hair was a tangled disaster, he hadn’t slept in at least three days and he ate only when Trace forced him too. He still refused to talk and avoided everyone as much as we would let him.

And one day, late at night two days ago, I heard him quietly crying in the lounge of our bus.

It was hard to watch him fall apart like this, especially when we all relied on him so much. He was our energy and passion; he was our enthusiasm when we were feeling down. He entertained us when we were bored and cooked better than Ant, Trace and myself combined. It hurt to see Mason so upset and as hard as we tried, Mason refused to tell us why.

Even Trace could not get the truth from Mason and everyone knew how close those two were; inseparable from the moment they met. If Trace couldn’t figure it out, then no one could.

We still tried, though. And Ant, Trace and I would often stay up late worrying over him.

Trace moved closer and Mason flinched away from him again, but Trace pressed on. He grabbed Mason’s hand and gently squeezed before leaning over and whispering into Mason’s ear.

The smaller boy nodded slightly before letting Trace lead him out of the bus.
I was suddenly and irrationally jealous. I wanted what they had. I wanted to be as close to Mason as Trace was.

I wanted Mason.

I was in love with Mason Musso.

I had a sudden urge to follow the two of them so I got up.

“Where you going?” Ant asked.

“Just going to find some coffee.”

Ant shook his head. “Don’t do it, Blake. They need some time alone.”

I had the distinct feeling he knew something I didn’t and I think I knew what it was.

But I didn’t want to believe it. So against my better judgement, I left the tour bus.

It was easy to find the two of them, they hadn’t gone very far and I could hear Mason sobbing.

As I rounded a corner I finally spotted them in a dark, lonely alley just underneath a dim little light.

And as horrified as I was with Mason’s sobbing was I as angry now.

Trace was leaning against a wall with Mason in his arms. Their right hands were clasped and Trace had pulled the shorter man against his chest by an arm tightly secured around his waist. Mason let out another pitiful sob and Trace tightened his grip around Mason’s waist pulling him as close to him as possible.

Mason was shaking as he cried into Trace’s shoulder.

I wanted to be Trace.

I knew I should leave, but I couldn’t bring myself to move. So I stayed and watched such an intimate moment I knew I was never meant to see.

I was too far away to hear, but it did not really matter.

I still saw the way Trace tenderly pushed Mason’s hair out of his face, how he whispered lovingly into his ear, how tightly he held Mason, keeping him safe from the hurt that caused him such pain.

And it was if the world didn’t matter. It was just them under the little light and they were surrounded by darkness that meant absolutely nothing. I watched in amazement at what I knew was real love and not just a cheap imitation.

I could only imagine what it felt like. The pain I saw written on Trace’s face was Mason’s pain. To know someone else so well, to trust someone so completely, to just look in their eyes and know you were meant to be together forever…It hurt.

I tore my eyes away. This was a moment for only them that only they could understand, but still I watched.

Mason finally stopped crying as Trace rubbed soothing circles on his back. Mason pulled back and wiped at his tears ashamedly, and I wasn’t quite sure, but I thought I saw a light blush on his cheeks.

Trace smiled softly, a warm tender smile I had never seen him give before. He cupped Mason’s cheek and wiped away the tears with his thumbs. Mason smiled in embarrassment, but Trace shook his head.

He titled Mason’s head up so that the shorter boy would finally meet his eyes.

And I had never seen as much love and passion and concern as I saw in Trace’s eyes as he spoke softly to Mason in what I assumed was reassurance. I felt so wrong seeing this, but I still couldn’t bring myself to leave, to just walk away and leave them be.

And that pang of jealousy still ate away at my chest.

So I watched as Trace titled Mason’s head up and pressed their lips together. Mason returned the kiss hungrily, pressing Trace into the wall. Trace grinded his hips into the other boys and the moan that followed made the blood flow straight to my crotch. Mason titled his head back letting Trace suck on his neck as Trace flipped them around so Mason’s back was against the wall. They attacked each other’s lips again as Trace fumbled with the zipper on Mason’s suddenly too tight jeans.

My own jeans were becoming increasingly uncomfortable, but still I stayed.

And so I watched Trace kneel in front of his boyfriend, lover, friend?, and freed the younger man’s erection and wrapped the his lips around it.

Mason squeezed his eyes shut in pleasure and bit his lip to muffle his moans. His fingernails dug into the wall as Trace cupped and gently squeezed his sac. He gasped loudly as Trace pulled back and swirled his tongue around the head of his erection.

One of Mason’s hands snaked into Trace’s hair as he trust into the mouth wrapped around him. Mason moaned so loudly I could hear him from where I was and after a quieter gasp, he clenched his eyes tight and came into Trace’s mouth. Trace swallowed it all with ease that must have come with practice.

My mouth suddenly felt dry and I swallowed thickly hoping to ease the pain. I was horribly hard to the point where it was painful, but I dared not touch my own erection.

I stood there in dumb shook as Trace stood up and kissed Mason passionately, his tongue delving into the shorter boy’s mouth, but rather than take Mason’s pants off like I had thought he would, he zipped them up.

My mind was screaming Keep going and Mason seemed to be arguing the same, wanting to return the favor. But Trace smiled at him and kissed his nose and said something more that had Mason blushing again.

They grasped hands and headed back to the bus and I scrambled to take off, heading anywhere just to get away.

I was in absolute misery as I wandered aimlessly down the street. I had a tent in my pants and a broken heart. I loved Mason, but know I knew Mason was something I could never have.

I should have listened to Ant. He knew something like this was going to happen.

Two hours later I somehow made it back to the bus none the wiser and still miserable.

Ant was waiting for me.

“How long have you known?” I asked.

“Three months, give or take.”

“Did they tell you?”

“No. You can just tell by the way they look at each other how much they really care and love about the other.” I contemplated Ant’s words and realized how true they were and how blind I was not to notice it. “Are you going to be okay?”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine,” I said and sulked away to lie in my bed in misery for the rest of the night.

But something stopped me. Trace’s curtain was open enough for me to peak in and again my curiosity got the better of me. I looked in to find Mason curled in Trace’s arms in the most uncomfortable position in the tiny cramped space.

But I knew it wasn’t about being comfortable, it was about being loved. It was about giving and receiving without thinking of yourself first. It was about just being close to the other and never wanting to leave the warmth they offered.

I shut the curtain and walked away.

Mason trusted Trace, wanted him, loved him and Trace loved him back. And as much as I wanted that to be me, I knew this was something I could never have.
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Jealousy Urges