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Himitsu	By : theProphet Category: > Kyo/Shinya Views: 983 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is the work of fiction. Do not own DEG and do not make any money from this.

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- 1-Himitsu
- 2-Himitsu 2
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Everyone looked at Shinya questioningly. The first thing that Shinya did after coming to work in the morning was ask them all to talk in private. So now everyone sat at the table looking at Shinya, but Shinya just shifted uncomfortably in his seat looking down and was silent.

“Well, Shinya?” Kaoru inquired. “You know we have work to do, don’t waste our time”.

Shinya looked up finally and said:

“It’s about work, Kaoru”.

“So what is it?”

“I… I have been thinking about it for a very long time, I have considered all the possibilities, but this one is really the only thing I can and should do…”

“What are you talking about?” Kyo asked.

“I… I’m quitting the band.”

After a very long silence, Die laughed:

“Yeah, a terrible joke Shinya. Now stop it and let’s go to work!”

“It’s not a joke”.

And as Shinya said it, it became painfully clear that is was truly not a joke.

“But why? What are you thinking? Shinya! I won’t let you go!” Kaoru finally came over the shock.

“I’ve already said, I’ve thought this over very carefully. I can’t stay here anymore.”

“Do you have health problems?” Kaoru asked. Shinya shook his head.

“Then what is it?”

“I can’t tell you. I want to leave the band knowing that you still think about me the way you do now and that you are not disgusted with me or hate me…”

“We would never hate you!” Toshiya said. But Shinya just lowered his head again and didn’t respond. Kaoru suddenly stood up, went to the doors and locked them.

“You aren’t going out of this room unless you tell us a reason! You want to ruin our careers without any particular reason. Well, that’s not going to happen! You have no right to do this to us! So you state your reason and then we decide things!’

Shinya looked as if he wanted to disappear and never come back. But he knew Kaoru was right and that he owned them at least an explanation. But it was just too painful and humiliating.

“I… I…”

Everyone just looked at him waiting for a reply. So Shinya decided to just do it.

“I’m gay”.

After yet another long pause of silence Die said;

“We suspected you to be one for a long time now.”

Shinya just stared at him.

“What? Shinya, get real, you just look gay! You can’t help it! We all thought this way, but we couldn’t just come to you and ask you, knowing how sensitive you are when it comes to private matters”.

“What Die is trying to say is that if it’s your reason, then you must not worry. It doesn’t bother us” Kaoru reassured him. But Shinya just lowered his head and remained silent.

“You mean, there’s more?” Toshiya asked. Shinya nodded.

“I’m in love with somebody in the band… for a very long time… for years… and I can’t take it anymore. The only way for me to forget and move on is to never see him again. But… it can’t be helped when we’re working together…”

“Who is it?”

“Really, Kaoru, do you expect me to tell? And if I tell you, what are you going to do? Force him to date me so that I wouldn’t ruin the band by quitting?”

“The good news is, it isn’t you, Kaoru” Die said.

“And it surely isn’t you, Die” Toshiya added, “because Shinya’s ready to strangle you every day”.

Shinya stared at them.

“Aren’t you disgusted with me? How can you even make jokes about this?”

“We aren’t disgusted, Shinya,” Kaoru said. “We had time to accept this situation, because we were pretty sure you were at least bi…”

“So tell us, who you’re in love with,” Die said.

Shinya just shook his head.

“Ok, if you aren’t going to tell, them I make my guess!”

“Please, don’t torture me anymore,” Shinya pleaded and he barely kept tears in his eyes. Seeing this, Die immediately shut up. Only now they understood, how deeply Shinya was affected by this situation.

Suddenly Kyo straightened up and asked:

“Can it be me?”

“What?”

Shinya looked at him surprised.

“Can it be me, Shinya?” Kyo repeated. “You don’t need to tell anybody who you’re in love with, just be with me. I beg you… And I try to lighten up your mood and make you forget him…”

Shinya stared at him not knowing what to answer.

“Why?” he finally asked.

“Because… because you’re… you’re the one I ever wanted …” Kyo answered silently.

Shinya looked him in the eyes and saw Kyo’s pleading ones.

“I’d help you to forget that other guy and maybe… maybe by any chance you’d start liking me…”

Shinya struggled with the answer, but the only one he thought of was a silent “Ok”.

Toshiya, Die and Kaoru stared after them as they made their way out of the room to have a cup of coffee and try to come over the stress they just encountered, to straighten things out and to just try and imagine them being together. They just hoped it would work out and wouldn’t cause pain and problems to any of the five of them.

TBC
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