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Vegetable Display of Affection	By : ChibiShiva Category: Singers/Bands/Musicians > Children of Bodom Views: 1464 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This story is a work of fiction. I do not know Children of Bodom, and I don't make any profit from this work.

Chapter List
- 1-Vegetable Display of Affection
- 1
Summary: Naughty, naughty Janne. Getting such ideas while shopping for food... Neither Alexi or the zucchini saw it coming. Janne/Alexi.

Vegetable Display of Affection

It was Alexi's fault. His own fault, no one else's. Janne Wirman's clean, pure-as-snow mind had absolutely nothing to do with such perverted things, no way, no how. Therefore, it was Allu's entire fault for picking that thing up. Even now, those large grey eyes peered upwards in a confused pout; so fucking adorable and child-like that the smaller man had to be guilty of at least something.

Perversion of a fellow bandmember.

Wasn't that a crime?

Well it should be, motherfucker. Sentenced to a hundred hours tied to my bed, with your legs spread.

Yet, Alexi sustained his look. "What?"

Stop looking so damn innocent. You're the one who said it'd be fun to pretend to be a gay couple. It doesn't matter that I agreed with you a split second after... it's your fault!

"Janne... what?!"

The keyboardist grinned in return. He reached for the item Alexi held – a zucchini, a motherfucking green schlong of a vegetable, for fuck's sake – and put it in the grocery cart. "Nothing, babe. What's next on the list?" he dismissed, then wrapped his arm around the other man's lean waist.

"In this aisle?" Alexi looked at the piece of paper in his hand and read the list aloud. "Tomatoes... mushrooms... onions..." He paused, and took a few steps towards the vegetable displays. "I'll be right back then."

Janne leaned on the cart's handlebar and chuckled. He let his brown eyes wander lecherously down Alexi's jean-covered backside... and didn't look away as the guitarist came back with more items. For added effect, he licked his lips.

With a playful smirk, Alexi closed the distance between them. He got on the tip of his toes and gave the taller man a quick peck on the cheek. "Missed me?"

"Man, that minute you were gone was the longest minute of my entire life. On the other hand, I had a nice view of your ass."

Alexi matched his grin and wrapped his arms around Janne's, then rested his head the man's shoulder affectionately. "It's always about my ass."

"Of course!" To illustrate his point, he moved his hand down Alexi's back and squeezed his right butt cheek. The smaller brunette squealed and giggled, but didn't try to get away from Janne's grasp. Instead, Alexi leaned further into the embrace. Eventually, they had to let go of each other to move.

"Come on, let's get this done. I'm hungry."

~

Alexi wasn't as bad as a cook he said. Impatient, yes, but not the kind of man to do things half-assed. The tiny guitarist diced a tomato, as part of the recipe Janne had found earlier on the Internet, while Janne had busied himself with a nice, thick chicken breast.

Once done, Janne washed his hands and set the chicken pieces aside. He moved behind Alexi and wrapped both of his arms around the other man's waist, careful not to bother Alexi as he continued his task. Facing no resistance, Janne slid a hand under his friend's black shirt and gave the soft flesh a light, playful squeeze.

Bony little cocksucker.

"Janne...!" Alexi giggled. He swayed to the left, but he didn't break away.

With his other hand, Janne pushed a strand of golden brown hair away from Alexi's neck. He slowly dipped his head until his lips brushed the other man's pale skin. A quiet giggle answered the kiss. That was all the encouragement he needed. His lips left a gentle trail of butterfly kisses up Alexi's neck.

This time, the smaller man moaned. His back arched and pressed against Janne's wider frame.

So maybe it wasn't much of a pretend relationship anymore.

Alexi let go of the knife and turned around. A flicker of lust shone in his eyes, followed by an amused grin. Pinned between the counter and Janne, the guitarist let out a light scoff. "It's not like people are gonna notice anything different," he stated, as if he had read Janne's mind. He lifted his arm and wrapped them around the taller man's neck. He pulled Janne into a rough sloppy kiss, his hands locked within the sandy brown hair.

After a long minute, Alexi pulled out, slightly out of breath. He assessed his surroundings; his kitchen, food sprawled over the countertop, the edge pressing into his back. He turned to face Janne. "Huh... Should we take this to the bedroom?"

A smile tugged at the corner of Janne's lips. "Good idea." He brought the smaller frame closer to him and captured Alexi's lips again. His hands moved down the guitarist's waist, passed his ass, and hooked under his thighs. With a grunt, he lifted Alexi in his arms and easily carried him to the bedroom, entertained by the playful yelps and laughter.

Janne set him on the bed. He towered over Alexi. He had power over this tiny, slender man and he loved it. Even more as the large grey eyes looked upwards, showing clear interest in what was to come. For a moment, he expected Alexi to take control of the situation... something about that devious smirk of his. His impression was shattered as the smaller brunette threw his shirt across the room, let himself fall over on the bed and unzipped his jeans, then stopped. An invitation for Janne to take over and undress him.

Something crossed his mind. At first, Janne shook his head. No... there was no way Alexi would consent to that. But... the guy was pretty open-minded, right?

Maybe not to that degree.

Still...

Alexi lifted his head. "Well?"

Janne snapped out of his state. Fuck it; he'd propose his idea and if Alexi said no, well whatever. At least he'd get to fuck.

Doomed to hell? Enjoy the ride.

"Stay right there," he ordered. "I'll be right back."

Alexi had no time to protest – Janne was already gone from his sight. He breathed out loudly and remained on the bed, eyes to the ceiling. Maybe Janne was simply gone getting lube, or a rubber, or something else to spice up this act...

He wanted Janne to finish undressing him. He wanted to feel those large, warm hands glide across his skin. He closed his eyes and imagined Janne above him, fingers caressing his chest, his waist, his legs, his erec-

Okay, if anything, his pants and underwear needed to come off right now. Alexi got back to his feet and unbuckled his belt, then dropped his jeans to the floor. He was about to remove his shirt when one of those magical keyboardist hands shot from behind him and covered his eyes; he yelped and chuckled in return.

"Just let me handle this," Janne whispered as he lowered a soft blindfold over Alexi's eyes. The taller man tugged his shirt upwards; Alexi raised both arms in the air and allowed his friend to undress him, before he was guided back to his bed. He sat on the mattress, awaiting further instructions.

"Alright, on your back, baby."

Alexi obeyed with a light snort. He figured he could play Janne's little game for now.

"Let's take this off you, huh?"

Janne's fingers slid across his waist and pulled his boxers off. He laughed nervously. This move let him exposed, as if he was caught on camera. He dismissed the idea and chose to focus on the calloused fingers.

A moan escaped from Alexi's throat as Janne wrapped a hand around his hard-on and gave a few long strokes before he withdrew. Alexi groaned in disappointment, but Janne shushed him.

"Be good, Allu."

Alexi scoffed and mentally rolled his eyes. It never stopped him from being naughty, and since he was supposed to be naughty... tough luck. "Come on. I don't have all day to lie around waiting to be fucked."

"So you want it that bad, huh? Well then..."

On cue, he felt something wet press against his backside. Alexi's back arched. His hands balled into fists. He let out another loud moan, as Janne's lube-coated finger entered him. "Fuck... Janne..."

The other man clicked his tongue. "Be patient. I don't wanna hurt you."

"Hurt me? Please. I've been fucked by guys be- Oh god Janne..." Another finger crept inside of him and his back arched as he let out a low, guttural moan in response. The digits moved in and out of him, reaching deep inside only to retract just as fast, circling and scissoring all the way out.

Alexi took a deep breath as the skilled fingers were once again removed from him. Disappointed, he sighed and let his body relax. It may not have been for the best, as he was not mentally prepared for something bigger to penetrate him at this moment. It didn't feel like a cock; it was harder and colder than human flesh. A dildo of some sort.

The fact Janne kept a dildo was amusing on its own, and he couldn't help but chuckle.

"You like that, huh?"

He'd have killed to see Janne's smirk – because obviously, the keyboardist smirked. He could feel that through his blindfold. Goosebumps covered his exposed skin, and his back arched again as the toy went deeper inside of him. He bucked his hips; mainly a reflex, but Janne had to understand that he wanted more.

And it worked. Janne pushed the toy further. Alexi bucked his hips again, this time a little faster, and established a slow rhythm, like waves crashing on the shore. His moans became lighter and shorter despite the unusual sensation of the dildo's slick texture and awkward curve... but damn, he was getting fucked by his keyboardist and nothing was going to stop him from enjoying it. Especially not the device used to fuck him.

The tip hit just the right spot – Alexi yelled out in pleasure... only for the thrusting to halt. Ripped out of the fantasy, he opened his mouth to complain and raised a hand to the blindfold. Like a bolt of lightning, Janne's grip shot out and pinned him down to him from removing it. The mattress shifted as Janne crawled on top of him. He felt the taller man's hot breath against his neck as Janne gently nipped at his collarbone. Alexi thrust upwards and his swollen erection came in contact with his bandmate's. "Come on, Janne..." he pleaded, "just fuck me..."

Janne bent his head and caught Alexi in a short sloppy kiss. The tiny guitarist under him grinded against his crotch, and actual penetration suddenly made a lot more sense.

But torturing Alexi was so, so damn worth it. Janne retreated between the slender legs and resumed his ministrations. He pushed the toy in and out faster while slowly going deeper. The skinny frame writhed and snaked under his touch, warm skin against warm skin adding to his own frustration. Shit, he wanted to get off too.

"Hold on. Sorry, babe," Janne apologized before he moved again, despite the annoyed grunt which followed. He sat up, careful not to hurt Alexi of course, and cupped the back of the man's head. With his free hand, he tugged at his own erection and directed the tip towards those pink lips. A pleased moan passed Janne's throat as Alexi instinctively wrapped his mouth around the engorged cock. To reward the smaller man, Janne reached for the toy and continued to fuck Alexi with it. The height difference between them proved to be quite handy, so far.

He loved the vibrations caused by Alexi's groans and moans, the soft lips brushing against his sensitive flesh, the skillful tongue lapping at the tip of his cock... "Goddamn, Allu..."

Proud of his fellatio skills, Alexi acquiesced with a chortle, followed by a drawn-out moan, the result of that toy being pushed against his prostate once more. Close to climax, his entire body stiffened. More muffled sounds of sheer arousal escaped his mouth as he continued to suck Janne off. Even with the blindfold on, his eyes widened – he still couldn't see shit, but he didn't even care. He reached for his shaft and thrust in his hand.

"Alright, I wanna see your eyes... Look at me, babe."

Finally, the blindfold came off. Alexi winced as the light hit his already-sensitive eyes. He shut them tight and waited a few careful seconds. Expressive grey orbs then looked upwards and met with Janne's browns, before curiosity got the best of him. He tilted his head until he could see what was going on between his legs...

Amusement and complete surprise mixed on Alexi's features. His eyebrows knit and his jaw would have promptly dropped... if only he hadn't been busy sucking Janne off.

Was it... was it really a fucking zucchini?

Literally, a fucking zucchini?!

Huh...

Hmm...

Whatever.

Janne knew how to use it way too well.

Alexi closed his eyes and went back to deep-throating his friend, as if to take his mind off the actual fucking vegetable. His body barely followed suit – he stilled. His limbs stiffened and his eyes nearly rolled in their sockets. A warm, tingly wave spread from his backside to the tip of his fingers. He curled up automatically, his moans and squeals stiffled by the cock in his mouth. His body ablaze, Alexi spilled himself over the sheets. His fingers dug into Janne's skin and thankfully failed to draw blood.

Not that Janne would have minded.

After long seconds, Alexi withdrew his mouth from the shaft. He needed to breathe. Exhausted, he turned to his stomach. He completely ignored the thick white liquid spread around his surroundings and went back to the task at hand.

"Yeah, that's it... keep sucking..." Janne urged. He drew both hands into the golden brown hair above his crotch and closed his eyes. "Fuck, I'm close..."

"Mmmmm-mmm..."

He really tried to delay it, he really did. Janne threw his head back and hit the wall as he reached climax. He forced his eyes to stay open so he could see the tiny man swallow his seed, fistfuls of hair preventing Alexi from freeing himself. The guitarist did not thrash or show signs of discomfort as Janne came in long spurts and forced him to drink the liquid.

Alexi let go of the softening member and moved in order to curl up against Janne's broad frame. His grey eyes drifted to the discarded zucchini. With a snort, he buried his head into Janne's shoulder.

"We're... we're not cooking with that..." he managed, somewhere between laughter and disbelief.

Janne, on the other hand, nearly choked. He secured an arm around Alexi's waist, pulled him just a little closer and kissed the top of his head.

"... Definitely not."
- 1
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Vegetable Display of Affection