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Until You Lose Your Breath II	By : theProphet Category: > Kyo/Kaoru Views: 1827 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is the work of fiction. Don't know Dir en grey and don't make any money from this.

Chapter List
- 12
- 13
- 14
Finally the direct speech is done in the right way for the English language and I won’t have to make spaces between every paragraph anymore ^^ Yay! ^^
Thoughts, as usual, are marked with **

CHAPTER 13

Toshiya didn’t even count how many weeks have passed since he last saw Miyavi. Did Myvs gave up and decided to leave him alone?
Toshiya wasn’t really sure if that was what he really wanted. He started to doubt himself. He missed Miyavi so much that it was getting unbearable. But whenever he looked up and saw Die sitting alone at the table with his notes, Toshiya felt betrayed and hurt and this feeling was stronger than the longing.
Toshiya sighted and turned from Die. He saw Kaoru talking to Shinya about something related to work. Kyo was smoking near the window, looking to be deep in thought. Toshiya didn’t like that Kyo started doing these things on stage, but he didn’t want to say anything after Kyo reacted so fiercely to Kaoru’s disapproval.
Toshiya sighted again and decided to have a cigarette as well. He went to the window and stood next to Kyo.
“Hey” he said to Kyo feeling a bit unsure if Kyo wanted to be alone or if he didn’t mind Toshiya’s presence.
“The boredom’s killing you as well?” Kyo asked.
“Nah… Just not in a mood to do anything.”
There was some silence between them, Toshiya lighted his cigarette and inhaled with pure pleasure.
“So he doesn’t come any more?” Kyo asked. “Not even to your home?”
“No.”
“It’s good then, isn’t it?”
When Toshiya didn’t answer, Kyo looked at him curiously.
“Toshiya, are you really unhappy about that? I thought you wanted him to leave you in peace.”
“Yeah… But now that it’s final… it’s hard to accept. I miss him a lot.”
“Huh…”
Kyo looked at Kaoru in the other side of the room. Surprisingly it was a pretty boring day. Not like the busy ones they always have.
“Kaoru sure is happy about the progress the band makes.” Kyo mused silently.
“Yeah, it seems like he’s the only one. You’re not enjoying it though…”
Kyo sighted and turned to look Toshiya in the eyes.
“Just ask me straight, don’t go beating around the bushes.”
“What do you mean?”
Kyo looked strictly at Toshiya and the guy just smiled apologetically.
“I did that on stage because of the reasons I told Kaoru and you all heard them. There’s nothing more to add.”
“But… it’s not normal…”
Kyo glared at him.
“Don’t you start nagging me! It’s enough that Kaoru keeps talking about it with me at home. Then we usually end up getting into a fight and having no sex that evening. It’s been going for too much time already and it’s all Kaoru’s fault!”
“Well, I wouldn’t agree, Kyo, but whatever. Do whatever you want, Kyo. Just don’t kill yourself!”
Kyo laughed loudly, looking very amused.
“Of course not, Totchi!”
“Ok, I think I believe you.” Toshiya smiled and they fell silent, finishing their cigarettes.
In the evening, after the work was done for the day, they all went to the car park at the same time. There was a big meeting tomorrow in the afternoon about their future plans, so they all decided to leave earlier and have rest before the busy day.
“Just don’t be late for the meeting, guys” Kaoru reminded them like for the hundredth time today.
“We’re not retarded, Kao, we can remember that” Toshiya laughed. Suddenly he stooped and stared somewhere in the distance.
“What’s the matter?” Kyo asked. They all turned to look where Toshiya was looking, but they didn’t see anything unusual.
“I thought I saw…” but then he just shook his head and smiled a bit. “It’s nothing. Bye guys!” He sat quickly in his car and left.
“Ok, so see you tomorrow” Kaoru said to Die and Shinya. They both nodded and went to separate directions. When they were from their earshot Kaoru sighted. They sat in the car, Kyo on the passenger’s side, and started going home.
“Kao, please, promise me one thing.”
“Yeah?”
“Don’t say a word when we get back home. Just shut up, eat your supper and then fuck me.”
Kaoru gripped the wheel tighter, hearing Kyo talk dirty. And it was quite a long time since he did that, not to mention any kind of action. They didn’t make love because they were arguing a lot lately, or simply because they were very tired.
“How on earth I could decline such a suggestion” Kaoru smirked and glanced at Kyo.
“What did I told you just now?” Kyo glared at him angrily. “Shut up!”
Kaoru barely managed not to grin stupidly. He focused on driving, for the first time feeling eager to go home.
***
Toshiya was sure he saw Miyavi in the far end of the car park. But now, as he was driving home, he started to doubt himself. It might have been just his wild imagination. He was so angry on himself for always thinking about the traitor. ALWAYS.
* Why can’t I just forget him and move on? Why? Thinking about him doesn’t do me any good. As well as listening to his songs while driving home doesn’t do me any good either. *
Toshiya growled irritated and wanted to turn the cd off, but his finger stopped just before it reached the button. Itoshii Hito was on. It was Toshiya’s favorite. Of course, it was his favorite after Aishiteru Kara Hajime Yo.
He ended up just turning the sound up. And before he went to sleep, he watched the video Miyavi sent him with the song for the whole ten times.
***
The meeting took more than five hours. Kaoru handled almost everything by himself with their producer and many other people Kyo didn’t even remember their names. All he was able to think was the wild night they spent and how sleepy he felt. He and Kaoru ended up trying to beat their own record and do it as many times at night as they could manage. They ended up with four orgasms and slept only two hours. Kyo couldn’t imagine, how Kaoru could still think clearly and be able to work. And on top of it, how Kaoru even let this happen, telling others have a good rest before the meeting and having wild sex himself all night long.
And the meeting was very serious. They arranged a tour in America. A whole almost two-month tour in America. Kyo couldn’t believe they were really right back on track. They were going touring. After four months, they’ll be in USA, having concerts, partying, meeting other musicians, living on the road, having fun while trying to sneak around with Kaoru to have some private time.
For the first time in his life Kyo was actually excited about something. He couldn’t wait for the tour to start and it surprised him.
Of course, seeing the mourning faces of the other three band members 24/7 was not something he looked forward to, but he thought that in a way this tour might be a good new start for everyone.
Kyo smiled a bit and looked at Kaoru. Kaoru was so handsome, so strong, so manly. He loved Kao’s nose, his small dark eyes and that hair. He especially loved Kaoru’s muscled chest and arms. And his tattoos. He loved… everything about him. How could this feeling still be so strong?
“HEY!”
Kyo jumped and turned to look at Die. It was him who screamed.
“What?” Kyo asked rather angrily.
“I want to talk to you. What were you thinking so hard that you didn’t hear me the first four times I called you?” Die asked. Kyo ignored his question.
“I’m listening.”
“Err… Not here, Kyo. Let’s go somewhere private.”
Kyo raised an eyebrow, but stood up and followed Die. The meeting was over, Kaoru was still handling some business, so they had a short break. Die led Kyo to the balcony, took out a cigarette and lit it up. Kyo did the same. Then Die started fidgeting and looking all nervous and Kyo suddenly got a bad feeling about this.
“What’s wrong, Die?”
Die sighted and leaned on the railing, not looking Kyo in the eyes.
“I’m not going on the tour.”
Kyo almost dropped his cigarette. He looked Die in the face and became really worried. It wasn’t a joke.
“What are you talking about?”
“I’m so tired, Kyo… I can’t take Shinya’s indifference and Toshiya’s hatred any more. I want to… I want to quit the band.”
Kyo was speechless. He never imagined this could ever even cross the guitarists mind.
“I know I’m giving up like a coward, but I just can’t bare it any more. Nobody talks to me about anything else but work. Toshiya tries not to even look at me. And Shinya…” At this point Die seemed barely hold his tears back. “I can’t live without him…” Die whispered looking completely broken. “My leaving would only do good to most of us.”
“But what about the tour? What about our future as the band? What Kaoru will say? What…” Kyo didn’t even know what to say, he was so shocked. “No, you can’t do this, Daisuke! You absolutely can’t do this! You’d ruin the band that we just managed to get back! Kaoru worked so hard for all of us and you’ll just screw it all! No! NO! You are not going to do this!”
Die looked at Kyo warily. Kyo was so angry, clenching his hands into fists almost ready to hit the guitarist.
“I just can’t go on like this, Kyo…”
“You must! I know how you feel, Die. When Kaoru dumped me, we still had to work together and it was a torture beyond imagination for me. But I survived.”
“Yeah, as if!” Die snorted. “You almost killed yourself and in the end you ruined the band on purpose.”
“And I’m not saying I’m proud of that. But it brought me back Kaoru, so I’d do it all again if I needed. But I’m not saying it was a good thing to do. So I don’t want you to do the same mistake. I still feel bad of what problems I caused to all of you. But this is different, Die. You can’t make the whole band suffer just because you screwed up.”
Die looked at Kyo angrily and Kyo sighted.
“I’m sorry, maybe it was too harsh. But please, try to understand that by leaving the band now you might feel better, but you’re going to ruin the future of your other four band members. And… and what would Shinya say about this?”
Die flinched at hearing Shinya’s name.
“Do you think Shinya would be happy you ran away like a coward leaving us all in deep shit?”
Die threw his cigarette over the balcony and sighted. And Kyo knew Die was not going anywhere. God, Shinya really had Die’s heart in his hands. And he had to be stupid not to know this himself.

TBC
- 12
- 13
- 14
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Until You Lose Your Breath II