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Until You Lose Your Breath II	By : theProphet Category: > Kyo/Kaoru Views: 1827 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: This is the work of fiction. Don't know Dir en grey and don't make any money from this.

Chapter List
- 9
- 10
- 11
Thoughts are indicated with **
CHAPTER 10
The week was very hard for everyone. Toshiya was unable to accept the situation and often would start crying in the middle of the work and excuse himself to go to the bathroom. Kaoru was getting more and more irritated by such behavior. Shinya now barely talked. He seemed not to want to talk to anyone at all, he even avoided Kyo. Die was not his usual cheery self. No jokes and grins. Just a gloomy face and sadness. Kyo wanted to say that he deserved it but he had to keep his promise to Shinya and keep silent.
But regardless all this, they were doing good in trying to make their band popular again.
One day after a week a guard came to tell that somebody wanted to see Toshiya in the lobby. Toshiya was surprised but went. When he saw Miyavi standing there, he wanted to turn and go back, but Miyavi caught up with him and turned him to look at him.
-Hi! –Miyavi smiled.
-What do you want? –Toshiya asked with a tired voice. He was unable to cry anymore.
-Totchi, I want to talk to you.
-You promised me that you’d…
-I know, -Miyavi interrupted him. –That’s what I want to talk about with you. Totchi, I’m sorry, but I have to break that promise.
Toshiya just stared at him.
-I truly want not to torture you and I want you to be happy. But… I just can’t be happy without you, Totchi!
-It’s your own fault!
-I know and I’m so sorry! I don’t even understand why I ever did that with him! I mean, he’s not even handsome! I can’t even remember anything! It was just a stupid mistake!
-But you did it all the same! –Toshiya glared at him. –Do you know how you hurt me? I loved you so much!
-Don’t you love me any more?
-I… It doesn’t matter…
-But I love you, Totchi! You’re the first one in my life that I love! I need you! I know you need me as well! And I won’t give up! I want you back!
-But you fucked with somebody else! –Toshiya tried his best not to shout. –And who was that guy, anyway? Who is so much better than me?
-He’s not better than you, Totchi.
-Well who is he then?!
Miyavi didn’t say anything and Toshiya got even more angry.
-I want to know with whom you cheated on me!
-It was Die.
-What Die?
Miyavi just looked at him guiltily and suddenly Toshiya realized everything. Tears sprang to his eyes and he hit Miyavi hard on his face.
-YOU BASTARD!
Then Toshiya turned and ran back. Miyavi wanted to follow but the guard didn’t let him.
* Well, I still have as much time as I want to try and get his forgiveness*, Miyavi sighted and went away.
***
Toshiya barely saw where he was running because tears clouded his vision. When he ran into the room where all other guys where, he spotted Die standing at the table. Toshiya ran straight to him and hit him in the face. Die stumbled and just stared at him. Toshiya started hitting Die anywhere where he could get his hands on until somebody managed to drag him away from Die.
-Toshiya! –Kaoru screamed. –What the fuck are you doing?!
Toshiya looked at Die with pure hate in his eyes.
-You bastard!!! I hate you! I HATE YOU! How could you do it?!
Die looked down unable to meet Toshiya’s eyes.
-What did he do? –Kaoru asked.
-HE SLEPT WITH MY MIYAVI! HE BETRAYED NOT ONLY ME, BUT ALSO SHINYA! FUCKING TRATOR!!!
Kyo and Kaoru were so shocked that for some time they couldn’t even say anything. Shinya just sat in his place his head lowered and his hands were gripping his pants. Die was unable to meet his friends’ eyes and just stared at the ground.
-WHY ARE YOU SILENT? –Toshiya screamed. He was so enraged that he couldn’t control himself. –IS THIS REALLY TRUE?!
-Yes, -Die whispered. –I’m so sorry, Toshiya…
-I HATE YOU! HOW COULD YOU DO IT? HOW COULD YOU TAKE HIM AWAY FROM ME? YOU DON’T EVEN LIKE HIM!
-I’m sorry…
-AND WHAT ABOUT SHINYA? DID SHINYA FORGIVE YOU?!
Die shook his head feeling that tears were gathering in his own eyes.
-THAT’S RIGHT! DON’T YOU DARE FORGIVE HIM! –Toshiya’s body was shaking from anger now. –YOU DON’T DESERVE FORGIVENESS!!!
-Toshiya, that’s enough! –Kaoru said feeling that he had to do something about the situation. –Die’s not the only one who’s guilty. Miyavi is as much guilty as Die. Shinya could just as well go and say all these things to Miayvi and you as you do now!
-WE WERE SO HAPPY! –Toshiya started to sob and slumped in Kyo’s arms who was holding him. –I love him so much and Die took him away from me…
-It’s not only his fault, Totchi, -Kaoru said sounding softer now. –Don’t blame it all on Die.
Toshiya just cried now and didn’t respond. Kaoru looked at Shinya. Shinya’s body was shaking a little from crying. Kaoru closed his eyes for a moment and sighted trying to gather patience and strength.
-Kyo, -Kaoru said and Kyo immediately looked at his lover, -take Toshiya to the common room and wait there. It should be empty now.
Kyo nodded and went away with Toshiya who didn’t struggle at all and let being led out. Then Kaoru turned to Die.
-We need to talk.
Die didn’t say anything but Shinya stood up wanting to leave the room.
-Shinya, -Kaoru said immediately, -I want to talk to you too. So please wait at the common room as well.
It was so obvious that Shinya wanted to say no, but Kaoru’s expression told him not even to try arguing. So he just nodded and went away closing the doors behind him.
-Die, -Kaoru said turning to him again.
-What do you want me to say? –Die suddenly said looking up to Kaoru. –I feel bad enough already. I don’t need your stupid speeches about personal and work…
-I wasn’t going to talk about work! –Kaoru interrupted him. –I wanted to ask you how could you do that to Shinya?! How could you hurt him like that?! And with Miyavi on top of this!!! You hurt not only him, but Totchi as well!
-Do you think I don’t know what I did? –Die asked standing up. –I don’t know why I did it! I don’t even remember a thing! I was so drunk! I love Shinya and I don’t want to lose him!
-Then you should have kept your dick in your pants for the rest of the year!
-There’s no point talking about this now. It won’t change anything.
-But Die, I thought… -Kaoru shook his head still unable to believe what was happening. –I though you really loved him…
-I DO love him! More than anything in my life!
Die sat back again unable to stand any more. He started crying and Kaoru sighed.
-Die…
-No… don’t say anything… I deserve what I got… But it hurts so much… I can’t forgive myself… so how can I expect forgiveness from Shinya…
-And you shouldn’t. Better leave things as they are. I always thought that you won’t last. I thought I was proven wrong and I was glad because of it. But it appears now that I was right in the end. Relationships in band is never a good thing.
-What about you and Kyo?
-We were the best example. He ruined the band just to revenge me. But I hope no more fights as severe as that one will happen. But you, Die, should face the consequences.
-I can’t… I want him back…
-It’s your fault all this happened in the first place.
-I know… but I love him so much… I never wanted to hurt him… never…
Kaoru was unable to keep his cool anymore. He came close to Die and hugged him. Die sank in the embrace and cried. Perhaps it was the first time he could do that, Kaoru thought and suddenly felt bad about being cold-hearted to his friend.
-Die, but you understand that you have to somehow try not to bring it to work. It is hard for us already without any personal problems.
-I know… -Die sobbed. –I know…
***
When Kaoru stepped in the common room he looked very tired. But he saw only Shinya sitting in the corner.
-Where are Kyo and Toshiya?
-Went for a smoke.
Kaoru came to Shinya and sat near him.
-You don’t need to say anything, -Shinya spoke. –And if you want to remind me that it should not harm the band’s progress to success, you don’t need to bother. I know that perfectly well.
-Shinya…
-Kaoru, -Shinya interrupted and looked at Kaoru, -I don’t want to talk about it. It’s too hard for me and it will take a long time to get over it.
-And you’d better talk with Kyo than me?
-Yes. We know each other from high school. I trust Kyo. And I don’t want to be reminded that it’s partly my fault.
Kaoru didn’t manage to say anything because Kyo and Toshiya returned. Toshiya was looking much better already.
-Kaoru, -Toshiya saw him and stopped. –Please, I don’t want to talk with you about that! I’m sorry for making a scene today, but I promise that I won’t ever bring it to work again!
-Am I really that horrible when it comes to work? –Kaoru asked. When nobody answered, he just shook his head.
-Forget I asked anything. But still, I want to ask you all one thing. Please, don’t blame it all on Die. Toshiya, please…
-I’m not going to forgive him! Never!
-But Totchi…
-No! I hate him! And I hate you, Shinya!
Shinya looked at him surprised.
-If not you, Miyavi still would be with me!
-Totchi, you’re being unfair, -Kyo said gently.
-I don’t care! –Toshiya snapped back. –Who’s being fair to me?! Why can’t I be happy with the one I love?! Is that fair in your opinion?!
-No, it’s not. And I know how hard it is to lose someone you love, -Kyo said silently.
-Then don’t say stupid things like that anymore!
-We’re not getting anywhere with this conversation, -Kaoru sighted. –We all need to chill out. Die’s already gone. You also can already go home. But I expect you all to be at work tomorrow and not to fight.
Toshiya nodded and went away. Kyo saw that he was already crying again. Shinya stood up and sighted.
-I’m sorry, Kaoru.
-Sorry? For what, Shinya?
-For everything. Toshiya’s right. It’s partly my fault. I guess we should have never started a relationship in a band. But I couldn’t help falling in love with him and I’m sorry for that…
-Oh, Shin-chan… -Kaoru felt tears gathering at his own eyes. He hugged Shinya and felt that the drummer relaxed in his embrace.
-Shin-chan, don’t talk things like that…
After some time Shinya broke the embrace and looked at Kyo. Kyo smiled at him sympathetically. He already understood that Shinya knew from the start with whom Die cheated on him. But the drummer preferred not to tell it even to Kyo and Kyo couldn’t blame him.
-See you tomorrow, -Shinya said silently and went away leaving Kaoru and Kyo alone.
-Kyo… Let’s go home.
Kyo nodded. When they were already in the car, Kaoru turned to him and hugged him almost crushing Kyo in his embrace. Kyo gasped from the unexpectedness of it. He returned the embrace and smiled.
-What was that for, koi-kun? –Kyo smiled looking Kaoru in the eyes.
-I just suddenly felt so happy… -Kaoru smiled. –I have you.
-Yeah, you have me… I love you, Kaoru…
-I love you too, Kyo… Let’s go home. It’s been a horrible day.
Kyo nodded and relaxed in the seat while Kaoru drove them home.

TBC

I’ve looked at how many exactly chapters are still left to post and… this story has 21 chapter >_< I’m so sick of posting this over and over and over again >_< And I’m only in the middle of it >_< Damn >_<
By the way, I was really happy to see that somebody finally rated this story with these starts or whatever those thingies are XD After I posted White Nights it immediately got these star-thingies after the first chapter and this poor story got one only after 9 chapters >_< My poor “…breath” story *cuddles it to death* I was feeling sorry for it so much XD Everybody likes BD and its sequel more than this poor thing >_< lol
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Until You Lose Your Breath II