Unholy confessions of a vampire heart

BY : nuclear000rainbow
Category: Celebrities - Misc > Slash - Male/Male
Dragon prints: 1018
Disclaimer: I do not know Ville Valo or any of the members of HIM, This is purely a work of fiction, I do not make any money writing this. Full disclaimer in chapter 1.



Dear reader, before you even start reading this depressing story, I think I better introduce myself.

I am Pain, a creature born of shadows, doomed for eternity to walk this earth.

A demon of disaster, once a human being but no more… This is my story, my legacy, my diary. And trust me when I tell you to never wander alone after dark!


Dear diary


It was the year 1666, the year of the devil. The night was dark and the moon shining bright over the tiny village I once called home. I, the son of a poor farmer

were out working the fields late into the night. I did not make a joke when I said we were poor. We only had one day left to pay back the baron the taxes we owe him,

or else my father would lose the small farm we were so lucky to own. You see, the Baron was a scary and vicious man, the rumors said that he prayed on young boys

and the ones that could not pay would give up their first-born sons to pay their debts. My father on the other hand, would be alone if he lost me.

My mother died years ago, when I was still a toddler, the plague ripped her precious soul away from us way too early. And I can not even grasp the thought of leaving my loving father all by himself.

The moon shining brightly, lightning up the landscape around me were my only friend at the moment. The crops only just starting to turn yellow, not nearly enough

to pay our debt. Dear god! I hope it at least will satisfy HIM a little, I do not want to leave this place!




"Ville! You should come in now! Dinner is ready!" The boys father shouted through the window, sadness seeping through his every word, even though he smiled his brightest smile.


"yes father! I will, just give me a minute to clean up a little!" I shouted back, trying to sound positive. Oh, yeah, my name is Ville by the way. I ran over to the tiny lake behind our house,

it was not the cleanest water around, but it would have to do. I took of my soaking wet shirt and threw it on the ground, after all that work, I would have to clean it in the morning. It smelled

like dirt and sweat, not that pleasant if you ask me. Walking slowly over to the water I stopped and stared at my reflection, I did not look like my father, or my mother for that matter.

My skin was not the color of the normal olive tone you would see every where around these parts of the country, I was pale, almost to pale. In the moonlight I almost look dead!

And my eyes, not the warm brown of my father, or the deep mocha of my mother. But bright green with specks of gold and shaped like the eyes of a cat. The people in the village

called them the eyes of the demon, they crossed themselves every time they saw me. I just can't understand why! I did nothing wrong. Well, some day they might accept me.

I certainly hope so and pray for it every night. God can't hate me so much that he would doom me to a life in loneliness, could he?


Breaking away from my reflection in the water I wash my hands and duck my head under, trying to get rid of at least most of the dirt and grime covering my body, before running back to

the house. The wind would have to be enough to dry me off, didn't bring a rag, so I just had to deal with my wet hair sticking to my face and neck.


"father? What are we having for dinner?" I ask, even though I know already. We have been eating the same thing over and over again since we got the note from the baron.


"I am sorry son, but it is cabbage as usual, it is the only thing we can afford." Tears streaming down from his eyes, a look of misery and pain on his face.


"I am sorry father, please don't cry? We will survive this, we always do! And in a month, we will have enough money to pay back what we owe the baron! Please don't worry father"

I try my best to hide my too skinny waist from his sight, the poor diet has been rough on the both of us. My fathers’ eyes are sunken in, and his cheeks are hollow

and his collarbones stand out even more than they used to. He almost looks dying, my god, please don't take my father away from me! I do not want to be alone!


Staring at the table we both start eating, slowly, trying to trick our minds into believing we would go to bed with a full stomach.


That night, I pray, I pray for my god to let us be spared from the barons’ vicious plans. I pray for my father to be well and happy; I pray for the villagers too. And I pray for my mom to watch over us from heaven. But I never pray for him to watch over me, that would be selfish. I fall into silent sleep, dreaming deeply about happiness and silly things. Knowing nothing of what the morning will bring...


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